


something to talk about

by tarantism (orphan_account), thominewt (obliviate1d)



Series: faking it au [1]
Category: The Maze Runner (2014), The Maze Runner Series - All Media Types, The Maze Runner Series - James Dashner
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Angst and Humor, F/M, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Faking It AU, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Masturbation, Slow Burn, but not really, newt is amy, thomas is karma, two of the pairings arent endgame guess which ones, you don't need to have seen the show to read
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-15
Updated: 2015-12-05
Packaged: 2018-01-05 04:28:29
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 26
Words: 156,972
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1089620
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/tarantism, https://archiveofourown.org/users/obliviate1d/pseuds/thominewt
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After numerous failed attempts to become popular, Thomas and Newt are mistakenly outed as a gay couple, which launches them to instant celebrity status. Seduced by their newfound fame, Thomas and Newt decide to fake their relationship to win homecoming kings.</p><p>Things were going perfectly as planned, but then one of them fell for the other.</p><p>-</p><p>watch the trailer made for the newtmas faking it au by our wonderful friend, charlie: <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=57A17HQs8SQ">youtube</a> or <a href="https://vimeo.com/119267220">vimeo</a>. fic also available in spanish and russian! check notes at start for link.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. one

**Author's Note:**

> so this fic is based on the au me (obliviate1D) and my friend (tarantism/[@grantgustins](http://twitter.com/grantgustins)) are doing on twitter. [here's the link to the tweet](https://twitter.com/hecallsmetommy/status/533762982040174594) and a few other friends/readers (including kinkynewt, author of spilled drinks) made fanmixes that you guys seriously need to listen to whilst reading this, so [listen right here](http://8tracks.com/samuiet/collections/something-to-talk-about).
> 
> the fic is being translated into español and русский! read it the spanish translation [here](http://www.amor-yaoi.com/viewstory.php?sid=147970) and the russian one [here](https://ficbook.net/readfic/3414510)

Newt was playing with his Xbox when a buzz from his phone interrupted him for the umpteenth time that evening. He took his phone in his hand, typed in his passcode — eyes still glued to the TV — and opened the message. He wasn’t surprised to find four text messages from his best friend – and as the other called himself, “partner in crime” – Thomas; he was forcing him to go to what was apparently the  ‘biggest party of the year’. The blond rolled his eyes at Thomas’ habit of showing his excitement even in text form.

 

**Tommy: newt bro dont ignore me**   
**Tommy: NEWT COME ON!!!**   
**Tommy: thats it im picking u up at 7.**   
**Tommy: tonight’s the night – phase one: chick magnet!!! SO excited**

 

Newt didn’t reply, knowing he didn’t really have a choice whether he went or not – this was Thomas, and he always got his way with Newt. Getting up to shut his TV off and change, he knew Thomas would eventually come and knock at his window. Newt had told him countless times to act like a normal human being for _once_ in his life and knock on the door, instead of climbing his tree to his roof, risking injury. But Thomas was Thomas; he never listened.

Walking into the bathroom, Newt approached the sink and washed his face. He didn’t bother to shave since he had never seen a hint of stubble on his face in all seventeen years of his life. Still, Newt ran his hand up his neck, toward his jaw and chin to check. He opened the cupboard to remove his hair gel, and when he stuck his fingers in he realized there was only a smidgen left. He groaned and put it back inside.

It wasn’t that Newt was obsessed about styling his hair up, he just hated how flat it laid on his scalp – and the gel did make him look more decent. He sighed as he ran his hand through his hair (deciding that people would probably be too drunk to care what he looked like for most of the night), ruffling it before walking out of the bathroom to his wardrobe to get some fresh clothes.

“Dude, you were supposed to be ready like, five minutes ago!” a voice said behind him. Newt jumped and nearly knocked over a table lamp beside him. Wasn’t his window locked? Newt turned around and found Thomas sitting on his bed, munching on an apple like he hadn’t just appeared out of nowhere and shocked the hell out of him.

“You need to stop doing that or I’ll bolt my window shut for good.” Newt glared as he threw his shirt at Thomas who caught it easily with his free hand, smirking and chuckling to himself. _That jerk._ “And I thought you were picking me up at seven.”

Thomas furrowed his eyebrows in confusion and threw his arms open as if saying ‘so?’.

“It’s still six-thirty, Tommy.” He watched as Thomas crunched on his apple quickly before swallowing.

“Oh, yeah. I wanted to pick your clothes to make sure that you won’t end up going to this thing in one of those ugly sweaters of yours.” Thomas admitted as he got up and made his way toward Newt’s wardrobe. He always knew Thomas hated his fashion taste, said it was too “British” and wintery for summer outfits in Denver – whatever that meant. Newt only ever scoffed at him and wore them anyway.

“My _jumpers_ aren’t ugly. It’s not like you’re dressing up fancily!” Newt exclaimed and pointed at Thomas’ plain white t-shirt, covered up with a maroon hoodie, jeans and well-worn converse.

Thomas dismissed Newt with a hand. “I’m already handsome. I don’t need to look _fancy_.” He emphasized the word with a quote on quote movement. Thomas was good looking. Newt had admitted that ever since Thomas hit puberty around fifteen and had grown his hair. Back in secondary school, Thomas always kept his hair buzzed. But now it was long and gelled up — like most of the boys in their school — which was what Newt knew suited him best.

Thomas threw him a navy blue t-shirt that Newt didn’t know he owned and a pair of plain jeans. Newt shook his head. “I am not going with this shirt.” He knew he would catch a cold if he went out with that. Call it an unusual habit – or his undying love toward oversized clothing. Thomas pouted at him, but Newt didn’t back down. “You know how I feel about thin t-shirts at night time, Tommy.”

Thomas groaned and rolled his eyes as he went back to his apple. “Ugh, fine! Go back to your stupid sweaters and let’s go.” Thomas already opened the window for him to leave through. Newt had promised himself never to jump off the roof.

Newt pulled on his jeans and put on a white button-up shirt before topping it with a gray woollen cardigan.

“Don’t blame me when you’re all sweaty and hot at the party, dude.” Thomas scoffed before disappearing from the window frame. Newt rolled his eyes when he heard a loud thump, followed by an ‘ow!’ after. Before he left, he told his mum where he was going, who made him promise to not to drink too much.

When he opened the door, Thomas was leaning against his mum’s black Toyota minivan, swirling the keys around his fingers once he spotted Newt.

“You ready?” Thomas said as he stepped away from the door. Newt nodded and got in.

The drive toward Minho’s house was spent with them betting about which of the two was going to get a girl first. Newt knew if it happened that it would be Thomas, but he played along anyway. Minho’s driveway was already full with cars, so they had to park the van almost three houses down from there.

When they got out, Thomas cursed immediately. “Shit. You were right. Should’ve never gone out on a cold night wearing a very thin t-shirt.” He said. Newt threw his head back and laughed.

“My mum said it was always this cold in the UK. She thought that it would be pretty much the same here - so she literally bought like, thirty jumpers each for us both before leaving.” He didn’t remember much about his childhood, about his friends back across the pond, about his dad. He was only seven when he moved here, his mum deciding that it was time for a new start for the both of them.

Thomas seemed to sense Newt’s change of attitude, so he put one arm around his shoulder and shook it lightly. “Hey, no more of that sad face, alright? We’re going to have fun tonight.” The hand on Newt’s shoulder dropped when the blond smiled at Thomas.

The strong smell of alcohol and sweat were the first things they noticed once they were inside. The loud music and people making out were a close second. They both froze and took the whole scene in.

“Whoa, so this is what a party thrown by Minho looks like.” Newt raised his eyebrows as Thomas nodded along with him.

“Speaking of the devil, let’s go find him.” Thomas grinned as he dragged Newt toward the background where it was less crowded. They weren’t popular, but they also weren’t the nerds either. Point was that they were popular enough to be invited to this party. Recently they had become friends with Minho, the most popular guy at school when they’d been put together for a science project they all aced.

Newt spotted Minho first, who was talking to one of the juniors at school. The girl was dressed meticulously provocative for this party. And her make up was definitely too much. He saw Minho telling a joke, and stole a glance at her breasts when she threw her head back and laughed. Newt shook his head and pulled Thomas — who already had two cup of drinks in his hands — towards them.

“Hey, Newt. Hold up, stop.”

Newt frowned and stopped in his tracks, whirling his head round to the brunet. He furrowed his eyebrows as Thomas continued, “Just wait here for a bit. Let him spot us – we don’t want to seem too desperate to get in his good books, you know?”

Mouth open in confusion, Newt shook it off and sighed. “Fine, whatever. But if you think he’s going to leave that girl to come speak to us any time soon, you’re dumber than me when it comes to these situations.”

Thomas huffed and shoved the second drink into Newt’s chest, forcing the lankier of the two to accept it. The two of them leant by a wall where countless ornaments and cups were piled on shelves, and people chatted loudly either side of them. They both knew how out of place they looked.

But apparently, the Asian did spot them. Minho looked up at them and stood up immediately, taking both boys in his arms. “Thanks for inviting us, Minho.” Thomas said as he took a sip of his drink awkwardly in that position, Minho squeezing both his and Newt’s upper arms.

“Of course I'd invite you two.” Minho turned back to the girl and dismissed her with a promise he would call her later. She shrugged and smiled.

“You taking her to homecoming?” Newt asked as he watched the girl leave, re-joining her friends to probably tell what just happened.

“Maybe.” Minho shrugged, “she’s kinda hot." He craned his head to the side, waving to the girl before pulling Newt and Thomas down to sit. Thomas shoved two chips in his mouth from the plate that was served on the table. “What about you two? Who are you guys taking?”

The question made Newt look at Thomas. It was yesterday when they both decided that they weren't going to attend homecoming. Not with a date anyway. They were too busy doing other things, and eventually forgot that homecoming was only two weeks away. By that time, both of them were sure that all the girls already had a date.

“We’re not going.” Thomas shrugged. What he said seemed to be shocking enough that Minho choked on his drink.

“What?” Minho said as he wiped his lips with the back of his hand, then wiped it on his jeans. “It’s your _last_ homecoming and you two decided not to go?” he raised his voice in disbelief.

Now it was Newt who shrugged. “We're not really looking forward to it. Plus, we've got no dates.” Newt said as he slapped Thomas' arm for taking too many chips. “You'll get a stomach ache if you keep eating those.” he said lowly.

Minho looked at the both of them as if he just realized something. “Why don't you two just go together then? Since it’s pretty obvious you’re dating.”

The chips in Thomas' hand dropped to the floor, his mouth agape. And this time it was Newt that choked on his drink. Newt snapped his head up as Thomas craned his. “What?” He managed to croak up.

Minho raised his eyebrows, his mouth quirking up. “You guys should totally go together!” he said as he sat closer to the edge of his seat, moving closer to Newt and Thomas. “The two of you are the first gay couple ever in our school. Maybe you can even win homecoming!”

Newt didn't respond. Thomas did it for him. “Minho, dude.” Thomas said as he clapped Minho's back. “You do realize that we're not gay _or_ a couple, right?” There was that humorless laugh – the one that Thomas always did whenever something ridiculous was said – at the end of it. Newt nodded along with Thomas, not liking the idea even just a bit.

Pretending to be a couple just to win homecoming? Even from the sound of that made Newt want to shake his head and scoff. No, they were not that desperate.

“Yeah, of course you guys aren't.” Minho said unconvinced. What was he up to? Minho then put one of his hands on Thomas' back. “Thomas, why don't you go outside while I talk to Newt here?” he suggested.

“Why?” Thomas narrowed his eyes suspiciously at Minho.

“Oh, it's nothing.” Minho dismissed. “Just a necessary, friendly boy-to-boy talk. I'm sure you'll find someone to talk to for a while outside.” He said as he tried to get Thomas up to his feet. The brunet reluctantly stood up and shot him a look. Newt shrugged and threw his hands up. He watched as Thomas walked out, slowly getting swallowed by the crowd.

Newt then turned his head at Minho. “So?” he asked. The lounge was starting to empty now that all the people inside had moved to the pool, so he and Minho were the only ones sitting there. Except for one of the school's football team members who was leaning over a blonde backed against the wall.

“I'm really not good at pep talks, so I'm just gonna get to the point.” Minho said as he poured Newt another punch. “You're gay.”

He was lucky Minho hadn't hand him the drink otherwise Newt would’ve spilt it at the statement.

“Again, Minho. What?” he accepted the drink from his friend and chugged on it immediately. If Minho wanted to suddenly conclude that Newt was gay, why would he send Thomas away?

“Newt, it's just me. You don't have to deny it in front of me.” Minho pointed at himself before he leaned on the sofa's arm, looking down at Newt. “And it's fairly obvious, to be honest.”

Newt frowned. “What's that supposed to mean?”

Minho crinkled his eyes as he sat next to Newt. “Ever since that group study we had – you, me, and Thomas – I started to notice things. I didn't say anything until right now.”

He remembered them being paired together for the project. Thomas was the one that was super hyped about that. At first, Newt was annoyed. He was sure that the jock would be a total jerk that did nothing to help. But he was wrong. Minho helped with a lot of stuff, he also bought them food whenever they were coming over. That’s when he had come to the conclusion that in fact, Minho was not that bad.

“Well, what is it?” Newt asked impatiently, wanting for this talk to be over as he suddenly wasn’t in the mood to party, wanting to find Thomas.

“Okay, so first; it's the way you dress, dude!” What was wrong with people in Denver and jumpers? He could hear Thomas’s voice laughing inside his head saying 'I told you so!' repeatedly. Newt gaped at Minho who shook his head immediately. “Not that I have anything against it, or anything. Moving on. Second, the way you act around guys – _especially_ Thomas.”

Newt was sure that he and Minho were friends for only a mere month, how was he noticing all these things? And saying it like it was _fact?_

“You talk differently whenever you're having a conversation with boys.” Minho paused, bringing his feet up onto the sofa. “Boys like Ben and his friends, I mean. You get all fidgety whenever they're speaking with you.”

He wanted to say, “Maybe that's because they intimidate me,” but decided that it would make him look like a wimp. He shrugged instead.

“And finally; Thomas.” Minho said again. “I'm not sure about this one. But dude, you two are extremely close for best friends. In a more-than-friends sort of way.”

The last point made Newt whip his head toward Minho. Clothes and attitude was one thing, but how was hanging around with Thomas all the time making him seem gay? “You have lost your mind, Minho.”

He made a move to stand, but Minho held him down. “I know this must be really hard for you to take in.” Newt gave him a ‘you think?’ look, but Minho ignored him. “But think about it. If you do come out, we would throw you a congratulatory party. There's nothing to be afraid of.”

It should've scared Newt to realize how the jock's tone had softened, like he was reassuring Newt. Minho was being serious.

“Yeah, I'm done here. Thanks for this whole,” he trailed, pointing at the two of them, “deduction thing.” He stood up to get outside and find Thomas, thinking if they came together, they should at least leave together. He was done with this party.

Newt wove his way through the crowd outside a few times, but Thomas was nowhere to be seen. He went back inside and climbed the stairs, spotting a familiar brunet sitting at the large window frame, but he was not alone. Newt stepped closer to realize that Thomas was talking with Teresa Agnes: The girl version of Minho in terms of popularity.

Thomas seemed to be too deep in a conversation with her that he didn't see Newt coming in. So he cleared his throat. “Uh, Thomas?” the brunet looked up at him with a grin still plastered on his face. It was then that Newt realized that Thomas' shirt was wet. It showed his abs and chest completely through the material.

“What happened to your shirt?” Newt frowned as he pointed at Thomas' abdomen, causing Thomas’ eyes to trail down to his shirt, grabbing the hem of it with his fingers.

“That was my fault.” Teresa finally spoke. And it shocked Newt that he was talking with Teresa Agnes too. “Spilled my drink on him.”

Thomas brushed her off with a wave. “It's fine. I told you that,” he said.

“Well, aren't you going to clean that up or something?” Newt said. He remembered Thomas saying how cold it was just before they walked in here. Now Thomas was sitting in front of an open window where the wind was blowing in, with a wet shirt clinging to his body, managing to not freeze to death.

Thomas shrugged at Newt, and gave him a stern look. “I'm fine.” If this were any other time, he would've left Thomas alone with Teresa. But he was tired and not in the mood anymore after his encounter with Minho. He pulled Thomas' arm to make him stand, and dragged him away from Teresa, who was stunned behind them.

They turned at the hall and Thomas wriggled his arm free. “Dude, what the fuck? Do you even know who that was?” he said harshly. “That was Teresa fucking Agnes!”

Newt turned around to face him. “I know. But we need to go.” Thomas threw his hand up in disbelief and made his way back toward Teresa. Newt stopped him. “Tommy, please. I-I can't stand being here anymore. Please. I don't have a ride home.”

He knew he would drag Thomas with him even if he had a ride. The idea of Thomas having a great time without him was unbearable. Thomas sighed in front of him, his expression changing from anger to compassion. Or pity? Newt didn't know.

“Fine. But after driving you home, I'm coming back here.” Thomas said. Although Newt agreed, he knew the slightly taller boy would stay with him.

They made their way down the stairs, and Newt was about to open the door when Minho appeared from nowhere and dragged them toward the living room by their arms, where the guests seemed to gather up. He stepped up onto the large coffee table in the middle of the room.

“Everyone!” Minho called out to the party and most of them quietened down, drinks lowered as they watched the host. Newt did not like where this was going. “As you know, this school has about seven-hundred students. So the possibility of having gay couple was inevitable. And I have an announcement to make.” Minho said in a low tone. He placed his hands firmly on Newt and Thomas’ shoulders, throwing them a quick glance.

“It’s my honor to introduce to you and hopefully score your vote for your future homecoming kings, Newt and Thomas!”

The pair mentioned froze, too stunned to do anything. Minho yanked both of them by their hands to stand on the coffee table. Cheers interrupted as the crowd raised their cups at them. Newt turned to Thomas; his mouth was agape as he reluctantly let Minho lift his hand.

Then Minho pulled them down as people they’d never met before started to come over and congratulate them, telling that they had their vote. Newt felt Thomas tugging Minho’s hand. “Hey, could we have a word with you, please?” Thomas said through gritted teeth.

“Of course.” Minho said as he let himself being dragged away by Thomas. When they were far enough from the crowd, Thomas let go.

“What the _hell_ were you thinking, Minho?” Thomas asked ponderously. His arms hitting Minho’s chest made the buffer of the two double back, throwing his arms up in defeat.

Newt stepped forward so he and Thomas were shoulder to shoulder. “Minho, what you did back there crossed the line, alright?” Newt tried to keep his voice calm. “Especially since you didn’t even give us a head-up.” He put both hands on his hips, glaring at Minho. The poor boy seemed to regret what he did. At least Newt thought so; Minho’s eyes were apologetic.

“Guys, I’m sorry!” Minho exclaimed with a strangled laugh on his throat. “But,” he paused again, “people seem to accept you guys just fine!” Minho clapped both of them on the back.

Thomas sighed and Newt ruffled his hair. Why did Minho do that? Suggesting that he and Thomas should go to homecoming together? That was fine. But outing them when they weren’t even together or gay in front of everyone? Newt could only imagine what would come for them on Monday. “And what, may I ask you, made you think like that?”

Minho scoffed as if the answer was obvious. Except that it wasn’t. Minho turned to Thomas, who seemed to have calmed down. “Did you see Teresa out there? Her eyes lit up at the announcement. She seemed sort of slightly interested in you before, even more so when she found out you and Newt are together.”

Newt had never seen Thomas so stunned before. Maybe it was because Teresa Agnes had never noticed him before tonight, let alone talk to him or look solely at him when other hotter, more popular guys were around. Not voluntarily at least. In fact, although Thomas liked to think he was a chick-magnet, not many girls really had shown much interest in him. Thomas even cried when he got three letters on Valentine’s Day from different girls, and Newt didn’t have the heart to tell the brunet that two of them were written by him because he felt bad. “Are you serious?” Thomas breathed in disbelief.

Minho nodded with a huge grin. “Totally.” He craned his head toward the living room, and Newt saw that the junior girls were about to leave. “Okay, I gotta go. But trust me, this could work if you two be yourselves. Plus, I know that you two are together however much you want to deny it.” Minho winked and left them be.

“Dude, we are so screwed.” Thomas whined, his eyes wide as he picked up a half empty cup — God knows whom it belonged to — before chugging it down completely. Newt started to walk away as Thomas followed closely behind them. He was done with this party. He snuck out from the back door to avoid more crowds, and walked in the direction of Thomas’ car.

“Where are you going?” Thomas asked from behind him. Newt didn’t answer as he reached Thomas’ car. It wasn’t that Newt was furious or anything, he was just tired, slightly irritated and extremely overwhelmed. He sighed and turned around, Thomas only a few feet away from him.

“I’m going home.” Newt almost forgot that he took a ride with Thomas. “I mean, you’re taking me home. Right now.” Thomas sighed in front of him as he rubbed the side of his face. Also another habit of the brunet’s when he was either tired or stressed. Mostly tired, though.

“But I still want to stay.” Thomas said as his shoulders slumped. Newt understood, especially after what Minho told him about Teresa. But still, Newt felt a bit upset because Thomas was choosing the party over him. Then Newt remembered something. If Minho talked to him about his sexuality, there would be no doubt that the stupid shank had done the same with Thomas.

“Hey, did Minho talk to you about any, uh, nonsense at the party?” Newt asked, and hoped the answer would be a no.

“Other than that ridiculous talk about us being together? No.” Newt let out a relieved breath. Thank God. It would’ve been embarrassing. “Why?” Thomas looked at him suspiciously. Newt shook his head so fast that it gave him a light aching sensation in his forehead.

“Nothing.” He covered up quickly. “Now will you please drive me home? My head’s throbbing.” It wasn’t throbbing because of the alcohol he consumed tonight; it was the fact that someone had falsely ‘outed’ them so brutally that it made him want to laugh. All he needed right now was his bed.

“Can we please stick around for another half hour? Plus, if we do go home, people will think that we’re having victory sex. Or something.” Thomas said. The thought of people thinking that they were having victory sex was worse than this whole thing, and Newt shuddered.

“Well, can’t you at least drop me off first? I’m really tired, Tommy.” Newt almost pleaded, avoiding the sex talk. He really was tired though.

Thomas squinted his eyes, the thing he always did when he was thinking. “Then they would think that we’re having a victory blowjob.” He retorted. And Newt was done.

“You know what, Tommy?” Newt sighed as he put his hand on his hip. “Go ahead. I’m walking home.” Newt’s house was not that far away, it would probably only take him fifteen minutes of walking in the cold, dead of night. He turned around as if to leave, hoping that Thomas would call his name and apologize.

Thomas did step forward, but no apology was said. Instead, Thomas handed him his car key. “Here, use my car. I’ll get someone to drop me at your house in an hour or so.” He compromised, his fingers cold against Newt’s as the blond accepted the keys. He was too dumbfounded to even move. Was Thomas really abandoning him for a stupid party?

He shook his head as he muttered a low, ‘fuck you’ toward Thomas who didn’t seem to hear. He climbed into the car and sighed. Newt was glad he didn’t drink that much that evening.

 

* * *

 

When Thomas walked back in, he realized half of the crowd were jumping into the pool. Now he regretted not tagging along with Newt. He almost turned around to ask anyone to drive him to Newt’s, but then he saw Teresa (surprisingly) sitting alone. He took a few deep breaths before walking toward her.

“Uh, hi, Teresa.” He wanted to curse at himself for sounding so nervous.

Teresa looked up at him and smiled. “Hey, Thomas.” She looked past him, as if searching for someone. “Where’s your boyfriend?” Thomas flinched at the word boyfriend. It was then when Thomas realized that Minho misleadingly spread the ‘fact’ that he and Newt were together. He told himself to deny the announcement.

“He’s not my-“ Thomas was cut off.

“I gotta admit, it’s actually pretty hot – you and Newt.”

“He’s my boyfriend and he just went home.” Thomas said quickly, taking a seat beside her. So Minho was telling the truth about Teresa. She looked at him weirdly before laughing; her head thrown back, Thomas couldn’t help but glance at her pale neck. Beads of sweat were dripping from her jaw, which was sharp and just so perfect.

“Did you two fight or something? Because of what Minho did?” Teresa asked with curiosity as she lifted her feet up, their knees touching. Thomas shook his head. Sure, both of them were upset about it, but now that he’d seen what he could get from it, he was starting to think how good this idea was.

“We’re not fighting exactly. I mean, yeah – of course he felt bad about it.” Thomas explained, his mind whirring to find excuses. “Um, he always wanted for our coming out moment to be special, you know?” Teresa nodded and hummed beside him, taking the whole story in. “I guess what Minho did just made him upset because he didn’t get the chance to pick the perfect time.”

“Then what the hell are you doing here?” Thomas looked at her in confusion. “You should be there for him!” Again, Thomas forgot that he was supposed to be a good boyfriend and cheer Newt up instead of staying here. He made a few confused, flabbergasted noises.

“Uh, of course! I was just leaving now.” He made a move to stand up, but remembered that he gave Newt his car. “Newt took my car.” Thomas smacked his forehead as he sat back down, hoping that Teresa brought a car here. It seemed that he was in luck tonight, because she pulled out a bundle of keys from the pocket of her tight jeans.

“I can give you a ride.”

 

* * *

 

Newt liked to break his promises sometimes. And this time, he broke his promise to never sit on his roof like Thomas always did. He slowly stepped out from his window and lifted his arms for balance. Newt had to close his eyes when he sat down, and he realized he was nowhere close to the edge. He crossed his legs as he sighed. Tonight was a mess, he concluded. Never in a million years had he imagined himself being so publically humiliated. But then again, he wasn’t being humiliated. Still, the thought of people he knew thinking that he and Thomas were together made him groan.

It wasn’t like Newt was disgusted by the idea, it could be worse. Like-

His thoughts were interrupted by the sound of a car pulling over in front of his house. He couldn’t see anything from his angle, but he heard a door being shut and a small ‘thank you’ echoed in the silence of the night. He recognized the voice immediately. Bracing himself on the roof, Newt shuffled closer to the edge, threw his legs over and peered down. Thomas was standing in front of his tree, ready to climb up.

“Hey, Tommy.” Newt said lowly, legs dangling over the side and watched as Thomas doubled back in shock. The brunet looked up at him as if stunned to see Newt sitting on the roof.

“Am I dreaming or is Newt really up there on his roof?” Newt scoffed at Thomas’ remark, rolling his eyes. The anger and sadness earlier slowly faded. Thomas walked back so he could see Newt better.

“It hasn’t even been an hour, Tommy. What happened? Did they throw you out?” Newt tried to joke and earned a scowl from Thomas. He didn’t answer for a long time before Thomas sighed loudly.

“Newt, I need to talk to you about something.” Thomas’ tone was serious, and the smile on Newt’s face disappeared. He mumbled a small but audible ‘what is it’ as Thomas climbed his tree easily, dropping beside him unharmed. “We should probably start talking about what happened tonight.”

Newt groaned lightly and buried his face on his hands. “Do we have to?” He asked as he lay back on the tiling, looking up at the clear night sky. He was starting to get used to the height and cold air surrounding them. Thomas scooted closer as he lay down beside Newt.

“I think we should pretend to be a thing.” Newt sat up at Thomas’ words.

“What?” Newt exclaimed in disbelief. Just an hour ago Thomas was cornering Minho for outing them, and now he wanted to go along with his ridiculous notion?

Thomas seemed to not realize what he just said, because he nodded enthusiastically. “I mean, how bad can it be?”

Newt gaped at how careless Thomas could be sometimes. “Oh, I don't know. Maybe the chance that people would find out? Or that we're not convincing enough and people get suspicious?” Newt exclaimed truthfully, "And why do you care so much about winning homecoming king now anyway?"

Thomas dismissed Newt. “Don't be too panicky, Newt. As long as we act convincingly, none of them will find out. Minho already thought we were together and people seemed to latch onto the idea quickly, so we’re obviously doing something right. Besides, when they cheered for us back there…it felt nice. If we win homecoming, maybe it will be like that more.” Thomas tilted his head to look up at Newt. The blond sighed.

“Tell me,” Newt rubbed his eyes tiredly, “one good reason to why I should do this.”

Thomas' face lit up as he smirked, thinking for an answer. “Because you love me?” Thomas' bottom lip jutted out. How childish could Thomas be? Newt shook his head.

“Obviously. Any other reason?”

Thomas' mouth quirked up once again. “Well,” he started, sitting up to rest his head on Newt's shoulder. “I get to hold your hand at school.” Thomas looked up as he teased Newt.

“Disgusting, Tommy.” Newt said as he laughed. Thomas tried to lace their fingers together, and something burned inside Newt, his breath suppressed on his throat. What the hell just happened? Newt brushed the feeling off as he coughed. Thomas let go shortly after.

“See?” the brunet looked at him, “that wasn't so weird!” Thomas turned his body around, facing Newt's. “So? Will you do it with me?”

Newt held Thomas' gaze for a while, before he groaned and rubbed his neck in defeat. Those bloody puppy dog eyes. “Fine! Just until homecoming, though, okay?”

Thomas threw himself at Newt, whose eyes were wide, afraid to fall. “Thank you! Oh, I owe you so much for this!” He said as he helped Newt back up.

If there was one annoying thing about his Tommy that he liked, it was his ability to make Newt do whatever he said. Even as bizarre as it was, it was one of the reasons he stuck with Thomas this long. Thomas was never boring.

“You better buy me some bloody expensive shit for his, Tommy.” Newt said as he hugged his knees, suddenly feeling cold. “Like video games kind of expensive.” he shivered once. Thomas laughed as he put an arm around his shoulder. He guiltily leaned into the touch, _just because he was cold_.

“This is going to be _wicked_.” Thomas exclaimed, causing Newt to snort.

“Wicked? Seriously?” Newt looked at Thomas, whose face was smugly happy.

“Yes. Just imagine years from now, we get to-” Thomas was cut off by his ringtone blaring out into the cold night. Newt pulled away slightly so Thomas could retrieve the phone from the back pocket of his jeans.

“Shit, it's my mom,” he said as he picked up. “Hello? Yes? Yeah, I'm at Newt's. Yeah, we left early. No, I'm not staying over. Okay, yeah. Sure. Love you too.”

Thomas' answers were clear enough for Newt to know what his mother was asking. So he shrugged of the hand around his shoulders. “Going so soon?”

Thomas nodded. “She wanted me to go home, like, right now.” He turned to Newt again. “Thank you so much, Newt. For agreeing to do this with me.” He stood up to leave, unsurprisingly by climbing down his tree. When he landed, he waved at Newt. “See you on Monday, Newt!”

Newt waited until Thomas was out of sight before he went in to his room. He flopped on his bed with a sigh, the nights encounter coming back to him. Things would change completely on Monday, Newt just knew. He was excited for whatever this was. Then the thought of what Minho said about him floated back.

Could he really be gay? He was too out of experience with both genders to classify. But if he were, he probably would have known by now. He was never one to predict his future or imagine his wedding day. Newt cared too much about the present time to do so. No, he thought, I'm definitely not into guys.

He felt his phone buzz next to him. It was a text from Thomas.

 

**Tommy: Sleep well sweet cheeks xx**

 

What had he gotten himself into? Newt chuckled as he replied.

 

**Newt: u gonna start sexting me now?**

 

Thomas sent him a kiss emoji, and two boys next to it. Newt shook his head and laughed, typing back.

 

**Newt: fuck off tommy**

 

He shut his phone down and put it on charge when he knew Thomas wasn't going to reply. He tossed and turned until sleep finally hit him.


	2. two

Much to his irritation, Newt was woken before his usual alarm went off at six-thirty in the morning, by three missed calls and four messages from Thomas. After straining himself to sit up on his bed, the blond yawned, stretched and groggily reached for his phone on his nightstand. Rolling his eyes, Newt opened his messages and squinted at the bright screen.

 

**Tommy: we should catch a ride to school together today**

**Tommy: wait scratch that we always do**

**Tommy: Newt?**

**Tommy: hellooooooooo?**

 

Newt threw his legs over the side of his bed, pulling the covers off of him. Thomas woke him up just to state the obvious, same routine they took every day? He groaned and huffed out a sigh, replying quickly before pressing send. That boy would be the death of him.

 

 **Newt: just come**  

 

The shower he took after that lasted just over five minutes, washing the shampoo out of his hair. Newt grabbed a towel and wrapped it securely around his waist, going to brush his teeth. His hazel eyes drifted down to his phone screen on the bathroom counter, when he saw it light up under the fog that had accumulated there. Wiping the phone dry, he picked it up with his free hand as he moved the electric toothbrush around his bottom teeth. Not surprisingly, the message made him roll his eyes once more.

 

**Tommy: ooooooooh, thought we weren’t going to sext**

 

The text was followed by a shocked face emoji, which caused a small chuckle to escape from Newt’s mouth after he rinsed and spat. He responded, _‘not what I meant’_ and walked back to his room as his usual alarm went off. Clicking the button to stop it, Newt trudged to his wardrobe to pull out something to wear to school that day. Settling on the usual trousers and t-shirt combo, he reached into the closet to pull them both out when a final ‘ping’ sounded from his phone, alerting him to a new message.

Newt grabbed the first bits of clothing out that he got his hands on and threw them onto the bed, holding his towel as he waddled towards where his phone sat on the duvet. He swiped it up and read the home screen, eyebrows furrowing. He slowly paced towards the window and threw the phone back onto his bed.

 

**Tommy: I’m waiting outside for you, so throw on some pants and get down here!!**

He tugged on the shut curtains by his windows, pulling them apart and there he was, waiting outside by his car, arms folded. Thomas grinned and unknotted his limbs to wave up at his best friend. Newt opened his mouth to speak, opening the window latch a little, but the brunet cupped his hands around his mouth and yelled up first.

“Thought I told you to put on some pants, dude,” he placed a hand over his winced eyes to block out the sunlight. Newt saw that his next-door neighbour stopped mowing her lawn for a second to glance over at the pair of them, huffing before she went back to her chores.

Newt’s damp hair splayed out as he shook his head in disbelief, retreating from the windowsill to get changed. He stripped of his towel and tugged on a pair of fresh underwear, as Thomas used the key under the Union Jack plant pot outside to unlock the door and step inside. He made a stop in the kitchen first to retrieve an apple from the fridge before starting his ascent up the stairs. Newt tugged on his jeans and began to buckle them when Thomas swung the door open, leaning against the doorframe. The blond jumped slightly in shock.

“Hey, knock before you enter,” Newt scolded his friend as Thomas ran and launched himself onto his best friend’s bed, “I could’ve been naked.”

Crunching and slurping on his apple, Thomas shrugged and leant against the headboard. “Wouldn’t have minded if you were. Besides, you should be pleased I didn’t climb the tree like you’re always nagging me about!”

“Because it’s unsafe! You could fall and land on your leg wrong and develop a limp or something – then you wouldn’t be able to be in the cross country team anymore.”

“Sorry, _mom_ ,” Thomas teased and took another bite of his apple, “I just wanted to tell you that we’re going to hold hands today.”

Newt pulled the white shirt on over his head and arms, not saying anything in response at first. He ignored Thomas’ first few comments about him being nude and calling him mom – they were just Thomas’ usual jokes and Newt had started to just tune out all the nonsense (he had to after being by Thomas’ side for ten years, otherwise their friendship would’ve been unbearable sometimes) – and pulled on his jacket.

“Only when we get to the school, yeah?” Newt picked up his rucksack and placed one strap on his shoulder as he looked at Thomas.

The brunet scoffs and lurches up from the bed, swallowing his mouthful before he takes Newt’s hand in his own. “Please, it’s not like we haven’t before.”

Newt reluctantly let Thomas hold his hand at first but sighed, giving into his puppy dog eyes again before they made their way down the stairs. The half-eaten apple was chucked into the bin as Thomas opened the front door and stepped out onto the Isaacs’ porch.

“You’re getting really into this already,” Newt let go of Thomas’ hand to lock up the house, putting the key under the plant pot in a different place under a loose floorboard. Looking up he saw Thomas sitting on the steps, nodding at what he’d just said.

“We need to be convincing to win this thing,” He shot a look back at Newt who started to walk down the steps, causing Thomas to stand and continue moving towards the car. He ran ahead to unlock it, pulling the door open for Newt to enter.

Chuckling, Newt shook his head and raised his eyebrows at Thomas, “Oh, _sod off_ , Tommy. I can open my own bloody car door.”

“I was only being chivalrous,” Thomas pouted jokingly before he shut the door, jogging around to the driver’s side to slide in next to Newt. They both clicked in their seatbelts and the engine rumbled to life, allowing them to back the car out of Newt’s drive and start their journey to school.

They drove in silence and Newt felt extremely nervous in the face of the unknown – he had no clue what would happen at school when they got there. Maybe I’m overreacting, he thought as he twiddled his thumbs, maybe no one will really care or remember the party last Friday and it won’t be that bad.

Thomas looked over at Newt early on in the journey when he first noticed him fidgeting, but the glances became more frequent in the last three minutes of driving. He took his hand off the gear stick and placed it reassuringly on Newt’s leg. “Newt, don’t worry so much. I promise it’ll all be fine.”

“Tommy, what if we get caught and all this brings us is the opposite of popularity?” Newt took a deep breath as they parked in the school parking lot and Thomas turned to him.

“If we play this right, it won’t. I promise.” He removed his hand from Newt’s knee after a small squeeze. They both nodded at each other before they exited the car. When they began to walk onto the main school grounds, they noticed people were staring.

Newt’s nerves hit him like a knock out drug once more, palms all sweaty. Thomas slipped his hand into his anyway and squeezed it, pulling him slightly closer so they walked with their shoulder’s brushing; a girl holding their picture stopped them dead in their tracks, causing them to frown slightly.

Taking one of the flyers she was holding, Newt’s eyes scanned over the picture of his and Thomas’ heads photo shopped onto two bodies in suits at a homecoming. The words surrounding the ‘masterpiece’ glistened in gold and read, ‘Vote Newt and Thomas your Homecoming Kings!’

Thomas piped up and asked what the flyer was, reading the paper over Newt’s shoulder. The girl only smiled, holding the stack of flyers tightly to her chest as she explained, “Minho told us to give these hand-outs to everyone. You’ve got my vote.”

“Right,” Thomas nodded as the girl bounced away, allowing them to walk into the school – only to find the same flyers being handed out by the student body and some being plastered to walls in poster format. There were big posters, small posters, banners hanging from lights – some were even being pasted over the other running candidates’ promotional flyers.

Newt didn’t know how to feel. People from all different year groups that he didn’t know approached them, telling the pair that they were perfect for each other and that they had their vote. It was all a huge, confusing blur to him until Thomas squeezed his hand once more, calming him and making the blond feel as if everything in the world was right again.

It’s strange however, that Thomas’ simple touch, simple action makes Newt’s heartbeat that little bit faster. But he pushes it aside, putting it down to a mixture of nerves and the adrenaline coursing through his body as they wove through the crowd of students heading for their first class.

Halfway through their history lesson on the roaring twenties in America, Thomas felt a scrunched up ball of paper hit him unexpectedly on the back of his head. His face screwed up as he turned around, rubbing the spot of contact as his eyes met those of the person sitting behind him.

“So?” Minho grinned widely, “Do you like the posters? Had Zart on the yearbook team edit them especially.”

His smile was so big that Thomas felt bad saying no, so he forced a smile and nodded before turning back around. “They’re great – yeah, they’re really promoting us for this crap.”

Minho throws him a thumbs up, “Don’t be a jerk and deny that you love the attention.

“Yeah,” Thomas craned his head to Minho again, “but poor Newt doesn’t.”

“Yeah, well, he’d do anything for you. He’ll get over it,” the Asian shrugged and once more Thomas turned back to his desk to get on with his textbook work.

However, before he began writing, Thomas’ gaze trailed to Newt who currently had his head rested on the table, a stack of books and loose paper being used as a makeshift pillow. The brunet couldn’t help but smile at him, but noticed a hand waving at him from behind the blond head of hair.

It was Teresa, and Thomas felt his heart beat faster as he waved back with a smile on his face.

“Everything okay there, Mr Murphy?” the teacher asked and Thomas quickly withdrew his hand back to the table.

“No, uh, Sir – I mean yes, everything’s fine. I was just… nothing.” He could hear Teresa’s slight scoff and muffled laugh from all the way over where he was sitting.

“Just because you’re the top vote to win homecoming king doesn’t mean you can slack off in my class, Thomas. Understood?”

Thomas nodded quickly and swiftly glanced over at Newt who had lifted his head from the pile of paper, one of the top pieces stuck to his cheek until he swatted it off with his thin fingers. The brunet catches himself smiling at his best friend – and fake boyfriend – again. He winked at Newt once the teacher went back to writing on the interactive board, causing a few people (mostly girls) that were still looking at Thomas after his scolding, to squeal audibly.

Newt looked around, noticing all the girls looking at Thomas and he sunk down in his seat until the bell rang, signalling the end of class. He gathered all of his books and non-completed work, stuffing them in his bag before he joined Thomas’ side and they made their way to their lockers. Thankfully for them, in their freshman year they had been assigned lockers only three down from one another.

The pair entered their locker combos, stuffing their books from their bag onto the shelves inside before they were startled by a familiar voice from behind them. Newt and Thomas craned their heads around at the same time, momentarily confused when no one stood at their eye level. A tug on Newt’s sleeve caused them both to look downwards at the curly haired, rather stout boy that stood there, smiling.

The sophomore, Chuck stepped back and placed his hands on his hips. “Hey, guys! My student rep team told me to tell you that as homecoming nominees, you have to do this promotion speech today in the auditorium at lunch.”

They closed their lockers in sync, Newt and Thomas nodding at Chuck whom they knew through various student council events throughout school – he was a friendly guy and both of them liked his enthusiasm and positivity about things.

“Hey, Chuck,” Thomas returned the smile and made his way to Newt’s side, “that’s cool. We’ll be there.”

The brunet’s hand slipped into Newt’s once again as Chuck gave them a thumbs up and a wave before departing for his next class. Their eyes followed his bobbing figure until he disappears, Thomas chuckling to himself as they set off for their next class. All around girls and guys were looking at them and their intertwined fingers. Newt attempted to ‘play it cool’ but felt his cheeks flushing in embarrassment… _totally_ not the fact he was holding Thomas’ hand.

Muttering was heard around them, and for the most part it was fairly pleasant, causing Thomas to grin and nudge Newt as another girl squealed, ‘they’re so cute together!’

Class was over fairly quickly once they got into the swing of it and once they were out of geography, Newt and Thomas made their way outside. Almost immediately they spotted Minho in amongst a gaggle of girls, talking and laughing as they fawned over his every move. Newt wasn’t sure about approaching, but Thomas lead him closer, picking up on the fact that the group were discussing _them_.

“Guys!” Minho stops whatever he was saying mid-sentence, “Have you prepared your speech for today? I told Chuck to give you a heads-up!”

Newt’s face contorted into a confused and slightly nervous frown, “No we haven’t. Chuck only told us that we had to make an appearance, not a speech – we were nominated on _Friday_ …”

Moving his way out of the parting crowd, Minho swung his arms around the ‘couple’s’ shoulders, patting them. “You’ll do great. I mean, you’re only speaking in front of the whole school against Brenda and Aris. How hard can that be?”

Minho must’ve felt both the boys tense up under his grip, so he removed his arms and let them hang loosely by his sides.

“Great…” Newt mumbled under his breath, “I have to win against my soon-to-be stepsister.”

Winking at them, Minho smiled and began to walk away backwards, “I’ll catch you guys later in the auditorium! Break a leg!”

For a good five minutes neither Newt nor Thomas spoke to one another, sitting themselves down on the grass out the front. A mixture of fear, excitement and panic coursed through their bodies, causing Thomas to bounce his knee in agitation.

“Tommy? Are you still sure about this?”

Thomas calmed his fidgeting and turned his gaze to meet Newt’s worried one. The brunet shuffled closer slightly and Newt saw the anxiety in his face completely disappear, replaced with a confident smile.

“Relax, Newt.” Thomas’ words exited his mouth in a low whisper, close to Newt’s ear so only he could hear, “No one is going to find out about us. We can do this.”

The blonde nodded quickly in response as Thomas pulled away, an uneasy feeling swooping over him. His brown eyes darted around to make sure that what his best friend had said was true, and that no one could tell they were faking it.

“Newt, are you okay?” Newt realised he was standing when he heard Thomas’ words and they brought him back to reality.

Thomas stood up beside him and took both of the lankier boy’s hands into his own, giving Newt a reassuring smile. Newt nodded and froze as Thomas leaned in to kiss his forehead in front of three juniors, causing them to incoherently squeal. After swallowing the lump in his throat that had formed at the contact, Newt looked at Thomas, the brunet winking. _If he weren’t the one doing this with me_ , the blond thought to himself as they headed towards their first of two lessons before lunch, _I don’t think I would’ve gotten through this so far._ Newt knew Thomas was his rock in this situation.

* * *

When Thomas met Newt outside of his art class, the pair held hands once again and Newt felt the former’s hot breath on his ear as Thomas whispered, “Let’s do this.”

The auditorium was overflowing with more students than it’s ever seen for any drama production held there, much to the drama society’s dismay. People were pushing each other for seats and anyone that left for any reason, left knowing they wouldn’t find their seat still empty when they returned. The room was light, however as there was no need for big dramatic technical displays at a tiny, promotional homecoming event.

When Thomas and Newt arrived at the entrance, Chuck was there to chauffeur them backstage, where the pair of them spotted Brenda and Aris speaking strategically by the stage left curtain.

“Thomas,” Newt pulled him aside, away from the curtains and any chance that people could see them, “what the hell do we say out there?”

Thomas bit his lip and released it, fiddling with his shirt button before he began to straighten out Newt’s top, "It’s okay. Let me do the talking if you like. We’re going to be just fine.”

He trusted him; Newt always did, and gave him a nod as they heard the crowd cheer then quieten as Headmaster Janson stepped out to the middle of the stage. The pair watched him from the sidelines as Janson tapped the microphone and encouraged everyone to be quiet.

After being pushed from behind by Chuck (he may have been small but _god_ , he was forceful, Newt thought), Thomas and Newt followed Brenda and Aris onto the stage to stand behind the clapping headmaster. The blond turned to his left to look at Brenda, but neither her nor Aris acknowledged him as they smiled and waved out at their 'adoring' crowd. _Figures_ , Newt scoffed.

“Alright, alright, I’m not going to say crap that you guys won’t care about. I’m only here to tell you to listen carefully to what both couples have to say and please, be nice. Brenda, Aris, if you’d like to now deliver your speech.” Janson stepped backwards, motioning for Brenda and her boyfriend to approach the microphone.

Newt watched his almost stepsister take the microphone in her hand and smile, Thomas sneering at them. Brenda loved to steal the limelight, and Newt felt almost bad running for something that she cared so much about and he, well, _didn’t_. He was only doing this for Tommy.

Her entire speech alongside Aris mostly consisted of Brenda repeating the word ‘tradition’ over a hundred times, stating how important it was that the school selected someone worthy, who actually wanted the title, rather than two nobodies who suddenly decided to run three days prior. The crowd’s excited attitude very quickly faded to one of drowsiness. Thomas muttered into Newt’s ear that they were practically asleep, as Brenda ended her monologue by saying how much it meant to her compared to the other competition.

Then it was their turn. Newt and Thomas took a deep breath, gave each other a supportive nod before stepping up to the microphone to speak. Almost immediately the crowd awoke from their groggy state, standing to cheer and whistle at them – and they hadn’t even began to speak yet.

Thomas looked to his side at Newt as he smiled, noticing the blond staring at the floor. A quick nudge signalled to Newt that _everything was going to be okay_. Newt peeled his gaze from the polished floorboards of the stage, and he grinned nervously at Thomas as the crowd ‘awww’ed.

Drowning out the things around him, Newt only focused on Thomas. Sure, he wasn’t paying attention to what he was saying to the student body, but Newt watched Thomas’ jaw as it moved, mouth as it formed words and smiled, moles that he joined together with his eyes like he was playing dot-to-dot, eyelashes as he blinked and nose as it wrinkled when he sniffed.

“Newt?”

Blinking, Newt snapped back to reality to find Thomas raising his eyebrows at him, urging the boy to say something. The blond opened and closed his mouth silently as he turned.

“Um, uh,” Newt cleared his throat, playing with his fingers behind him, “I just wanted to say that it’s a complete privilege and I’m honoured to be nominated for homecoming king this year.”

He said nothing else as Thomas came up behind him and muttered, “It’s okay.” The brunet nodded before pressing his lips to Newt’s cheek in a quick spontaneous kiss, leaving Newt blushing once again. For a while, Newt was frozen to the spot and all he could think was, _I thought we said no kisses, which includes forehead and cheek ones too, Tommy._ But he soon snapped out of his internal soliloquy to look at Thomas, who was beaming out at the crowd like he belonged there.

“Thank you all for nominating us at such short notice. As Newt said, It’s a real honor!”

Then they were off the stage and out of the auditorium in a flash, Thomas laughing as he led Newt down the wide corridor. Newt let himself be pulled away, he was happy to no longer be the centre of attention once again. He knew this relationship and possible homecoming win would change that for good, but Newt wanted to treasure these last few moments of almost-normality alongside Thomas.

“That was amazing! We are so going to win now!” Thomas’ expression was happy, but quickly morphed into one of concern when he spotted Newt’s not-as-pleased appearance, “What’s wrong?”

“Do you think we did enough?” Newt rubbed his folded arms, head turning towards the entrance to the auditorium as it opened and hoards of students filed out.

Booming footsteps and enraged huffs of breath stopped Thomas from speaking as Aris Jones, Brenda’s boyfriend and other half in the homecoming line up, stormed towards the pair of them and shoved the brunet on the shoulder.

“What do you think you’re playing at?”

“Whoa, dude. What do you mean?” Thomas asked coolly, raising his eyebrows, as he knew where the conversation would go already. Newt watched with wide eyes, as did other students who stopped to watch the encounter.

Aris pointed his finger at Thomas’ face, “You’re not fooling anybody with your game, just drop out of the line up for homecoming and go back to being best friends. You don’t even care about this competition!”

Newt felt himself getting panicky as Aris folded his arms in a rage, Thomas saying sternly, “We’re together.”

A scoff could be heard leaving the shorter boy’s mouth as Aris shook his head, “Yeah, right! How do we know that? You two have no proof – just admit you don’t care about this and drop out. Go back to being best friends.”

The blond stared at Thomas who was practically backed up against a locker. His eyes weren’t on Aris though, and Newt followed Thomas’ gaze until it fell on a certain dark-haired somebody appearing through the crowd. Teresa. Newt could see Thomas trying his hardest not to smile.

Realising it was him who had to do something otherwise Thomas would blow this thing for good (or at least get a punch in the face from Aris, who was fuming), Newt cleared his throat as he found his voice.

He stepped closer to Thomas, the crowd muttering, palms sweating. With a deep breath, Newt stood tall and stated, “Would a best friend do _this?_ ”

Thomas furrowed his eyebrows and turned to Newt when his voice filled his mind. But before he could say anything, Newt took Thomas’ face in his hands and brought their lips together swiftly.


	3. three

The moment their lips met, Newt’s body felt like it was on fire. At first he thought that it was because of embarrassment, from the catcalls that surrounded them. But as Thomas moved his head so their mouths were pressed more firmly against each other, Newt let out a sigh in realisation that it was because of the kiss itself.

Thomas’s lips were soft against his, although a bit chapped, making his eyes flutter shut at the feeling. The side of his nose brushed against Newt’s softly as the brunet angled the kiss more to the side. Seconds passed by, the whistles eventually died down as the hands that were originally placed on both of Thomas’s cheeks dropped flatly onto his chest, resting there.

Thomas pulled away, catching his breath; their eyes remained closed as their foreheads and noses touched. Newt opened his eyes first slowly, and looked at Thomas’ furrowed eyebrows. Then it was gone as he gave Newt a smile in the most convincing love-struck manner and (guiltily) Newt’s heart did a _thing_ he couldn’t really describe.

A familiar snapping sound from a phone made Newt turn around. Students stood in a circle around them, all mouths agape at the sight of them kissing. The blond blushed a rosy red as he felt all their eyes on him. Though, he was quite relieved to find no hatred or disgust behind them from what he could make out. He then realised why he had kissed Thomas in the first place and turned to Aris, “There, you have your bloody proof.”

He dragged Thomas away from the now cheering crowd — and a very un-amused Aris — to an empty class a corridor or two away. Silence surrounded them, the only audible noise being scraping sound of Newt’s shoes as he closed the door and shuffled into the room – along with the small gasp escaping his throat at the realisation that he kissed his best friend. Totally against the rule that _he_ had made.

“Holy shit, Tommy. I am _so_ sorry that I kissed you.” Newt finally blurted out as he ran his hands through his hair, feeling sick of the awkward tension between them. “You just seemed so… lost back there.”

Thomas looked up at him with an amused expression once he took a seat on one of the desks. “Calm down, Newt. Easy. I wasn’t mad or anything and I’m still not.”

Then Newt realised that his tone _was_ a bit panicky. “But you weren’t saying anything the whole time!”

“Neither did you.”

That shut Newt up. Thomas had told him to let him do the talking, but Newt brushed that thought aside. The brunet’s shoulders shook, eyes crinkled as he sniggered. The blond tried to hold his own laughter, but joined in anyway when Thomas finally let go.

“Oh, god. I can’t believe that we just kissed.”

Thomas shook his head when their laughter died down. “ _But…_ ”

 _Oh no,_ Newt thought. Thomas held a finger up as his eyes showed mischief.

“What now?” Newt whispered to himself the same time Thomas stood up from the desk, gripping him by the shoulders. Despite not wanting to, he tensed under his best friend’s touch, but let him guide him wherever he was going

“I think it’s the perfect way to sell it.” The brunet pulled him out of the empty class to find themselves alone at the hall. “I mean, constantly showing them PDA’s couldn’t hurt, right?” Thomas looked at him with so much hope, as if saying ‘you wouldn’t mind, right? For me?’

He and Thomas had always been rather... touchy-feely toward each other. Even for best friends that had known each other for ten years. One time they had a sleepover and had woken up with their limbs tangled around each other, huddled so closely. Neither of them felt weird about it when they unknotted themselves. Newt also remembered that time where they went out to play with Thomas’ new skateboard, but then it rained hard and they had to wait until the rain stopped at the bus stop. Newt was freezing so much that his body shook, but then Thomas took his hands in his and blew out hot breaths onto them to warm them up. Always smiling. It still wasn't weird. Not to them.

And they kissed today. If he looked back to their history together, Newt decided that today was almost _nothing_. So what harm could a little bit of public displays of affection do?

“Fine.” Newt agreed after a minute with a sly smile. “Only because I don’t want my ass handed to me by my sister and her arsehole of a boyfriend, alright?”

Thomas beamed wide and, Newt’s eyes wide, lunged for the shocked, lanky blond by his side. He secured Newt’s head under his arm, rubbing his knuckle on it as they laughed and he thanked the blond for being _so damn amazing._ Quote.

They ended up skipping the rest of lunch — planned to bail English as well — and sat at the deserted park at the very back of the school. None of the students understood the point of the supposedly childish, crowded place – none knew the fact that it was the perfect place to bail to if you didn’t want to get caught – but Newt was glad that it existed. Nonetheless, he was surprised to find a couple of girls sitting on the grass, their chattering turning to excited gossip when they saw the high school’s new star couple approaching. He groaned.

“Do we really have to stay here?” Newt whined as Thomas pulled him down on the grass. One of the girls noticed the action and started to giggle. “I feel like a bloody celebrity now.”

Thomas chuckled and raised his eyebrows. “I hope you meant that in a good way.”

Newt _was_ excited about this. Only a tad though, he told himself. Though the thought of getting caught made him doubt just a little. And the things they had to do to _not_ get outed required them to kiss, hold hands, all that PDA Newt always saw in the halls and tried to avoid. It wasn't weird doing it though, no, Newt had been used of physical contacts with Thomas. It was just the fact that it made him feel like a desperate loser, having to fake yourself to be noticed. But whatever, Newt was doing this for Thomas. He always did.

“All good, Tommy.” Newt said before pulling out a textbook from his bag. Before he even got it out, Thomas sniggered at him and rolled his eyes at him.

“Dude, we bailed on a class and you're gonna use this time to do _class_ work?” he said, moving his bag around behind him, puffing it out a bit, before he laid his head down on the item like a pillow.

“I'm not doing classwork. You are.” Newt said, dumping the book on Thomas's chest, who let out an exasperated groan at the sudden hit on his torso. “Because I'm pretty sure you haven't studied for that History test after this.”

And immediately, Thomas sat up. “The History test is _today_?”

Newt threw his head back and laughed. “No, I'm just kidding.” Thomas threw the book at back at Newt and huffed out a breath. The brunet muttered a low, angry, 'not funny, Newt' before going back to his position.

It was silent as the blond continued to read his notebook, and when he looked up, the girls were gone and Thomas was closing his eyes. He checked his watch, ten more minutes before the next period.

 

* * *

 

“Hey, Newt?” Thomas muttered after a while. Newt looked down at him, his eyes were still closed, a hand over his forehead to probably block the sunlight. He gave Thomas a hum in response.

“What do you think of Teresa?”

Teresa? Teresa Agnes?

“You mean that Teresa you talked to at Minho's party?” Thomas nodded as he opened his eyes, turning to lie on his side, using his right arm for support.

He never really talked with Teresa enough to have an opinion on her. But he had heard enough information about her flying around the school from the other people's mouths. He knew she was the most popular girl in school. But not for the right reasons. He knew that she never really had boyfriends. And liked to sleep around. So he settled on her looks as an answer.

“Uh, I think she's a gorgeous, hot girl.” Newt said slowly, and narrowed his eyes when Thomas muttered, 'hell yeah she's a gorgeous, hot girl'. “Why?”

Thomas grinned at him, eyes lighting up. “Oh, no… nothing. I was just asking your opinion about her.”

Newt frowned at him. The brunet was grinning as if they hadn't been friends for years. No. He knew that look. It was the look when Thomas denied that he had a crush on Harriet back in sophomore year. The bastard _liked_ Teresa.

“You like her.” Newt stated bluntly, arms folding across his chest.

“What? No! _No_ , I don't!” Thomas said quickly, which earned a knowing tilt of the head from Newt. The brunet sighed. “Alright, maybe. A little. But I can't!”

“Why not?” Newt asked in confusion.

“ _Because,_ ” Thomas started as he packed Newt's stuff and put it inside his bag. He pulled Newt up easily as he stood, taking the boy’s hand in his own, “we're in the middle of something here. We're faking it, remember?”

Ah. Newt had almost forgotten that they were 'dating'. Which meant they couldn't have other girlfriends. Because they were _an item_.

He wanted to kick Minho's ass _so much_ for starting this.

“Well, yeah. It would be weird if you just started to date other people.” Thomas agreed at that, but furrowed his eyebrows like he always did when thinking. When they entered the halls, it was crowded. Thomas repositioned his hand in Newt’s, linking their fingers together. Thomas's hand was warm against his cold one. Like always, Thomas completed his missing piece. In lots of ways.

“Do you think I should tell her? About us, I mean. I think she could keep the secret, and then who knows?” Newt groaned and shook his head before Thomas even finished his thought. “What? Why are you shaking your head right now?”

“It's just, _I don't know_. Don't you think it would defeat the whole point of this?” Newt reasoned. How would Thomas know that Teresa could keep the secret? “Plus, you've only hung out with Teresa once, Tommy. This is a big secret.”

Thomas nodded beside him, seemingly getting the point. “Okay. But when we're done with this, I'm going for it.”

Newt rolled his eyes and muttered a low, 'do whatever you want, Tommy'. The brunet apparently heard it and shoved Newt playfully. “Really? Oh, Newt – I could kiss you right now!”

He was about to push Thomas away when he felt his phone buzz in his pocket. He tugged the device out and unlocked it, gasping slightly when he opened the message.

It was a picture of him and Thomas kissing, already edited with filters and hearts around them. The caption said, “ALL HAIL OUR KINGS” in huge gold and red letters. When he looked up, he noticed Thomas had received the message too. And so did everyone around him.

“Hey, this is so cute. Newt, did you get the pic too?” Thomas said, looking over his shoulder to see Newt's phone. “I'm going to make this my lock screen picture.”

Newt knew that Thomas wasn't serious, because he let out a grin when two girls cooed at them. Thomas leaned closely, lips almost touching him and whispered in his ear. “We are so going to win this now.”

He nodded and quickly clapped Thomas on the back. “Okay, Tommy. Class is gonna start soon, we better go.”

Thomas put Newt's hand down, confusing him as he saw his best friend’s head turn in the opposite direction to where they were meant to be going. Newt looked at Thomas before following his gaze. Unsurprisingly, Teresa stood in front of her locker, eyes glued to her phone screen. She probably got the picture too – it seemed like the whole school did. “Hey, I'll meet you in class, alright? I'm gonna talk to her for a while.”

Newt groaned and rolled his eyes, watching as his best friend suddenly turned into a giddy puppy. “Okay. Don't be late.”

He turned to the right to head to History while Thomas went forward to talk to the girl.

 

* * *

 

 

Newt waited for Thomas in the parking lot, they planned to play some FIFA before finishing their project for Science that was due in two days. It was supposed to be group work, the other member being a guy named Clint, but his relative passed away so he had to leave town for a week. Though he had told them that he could do the work from scratch by himself.

So here Newt was, leaning against Thomas' mom's car, playing with his phone as he waited for Thomas. Just as he was about to beat his high score on a stupid time-passing game, a text from Thomas made Newt mis-touch the screen, causing the player to slip and hit the maze wall. He groaned.

**Tommy: look up. right. now.**

He reluctantly did what he was told and there Thomas was, grinning so widely in Newt's direction with Teresa Agnes close by his side. So close that their hips and arms brushed as they walked. She was laughing as Thomas probably told her the lame jokes he always told Newt.

When they stopped in front of him, it was concluded that they were talking about that time when Justin Timberlake's hair resembled an uncooked noodle.

“I'll send you the picture later.” Thomas said through fits. Teresa calmed her giggling and smiled at him beautifully, causing Newt to raise his eyebrows and part his lips in response. She then shot a look to Newt quickly, and turned back Thomas when his laughter died down.

“I like you, Thomas.” She said, gripping the top of his arm to give it a squeeze.

Even from Newt's side, he could feel the way Thomas' body jerked very lightly in shock, then froze on his spot. His mouth was opened. “R-really?”

Newt rolled his eyes. _Pathetic little puppy,_ he thought.

Teresa nodded, seemingly oblivious to the fact that Thomas' cheeks were redder than a second ago.

Thomas was still gaping, so Newt took pity on the boy and stepped forward. He grabbed Thomas' waist and pulled him closer. The movement must've surprised the brunet as he looked at Newt confusedly.

Ah, so Newt wasn't the one that kept on forgetting that they were faking it. But the difference was that Thomas was the one who most wanted this.

Though Teresa must've got the cue, because she looked at Newt's hand briefly before nodding. “I should go home. Catch you later!” She walked away with a skip in her step, hips waggling. If there was any seventeen-year-old girl that would look cute-but-not-annoyingly-childish while skipping her steps, it would be Teresa Agnes. It made Newt dislike her.

“Dude, did you hear that?” Thomas finally breathed once they both looked away from her. “She _likes_ me!” And then Thomas let out a triumphant wheezy cheer. Newt scoffed at how desperately pitiful Thomas sounded right now.

“I think she meant she likes you as a _friend,_ Tommy.” Newt said once they got into the car, nearly trapping his foot when he closed the door. “Before you ask me why, just remember that it was your idea-”

“Minho's idea,” Thomas tried to correct softly.

“-to play along with Minho's stupid and also false assumption of us dating.” Newt finished as he put on the seatbelt, a little too tightly around his crotch from the vicious pulling he did while he spoke. “I'm more than happy to quit this.”

Though some part of him really wanted to keep going. Popularity had its perks in Newt's life this past day. A junior even offered to stick some of the posters that he was carrying after last period to the walls.

“Hey, don't ruin it.” Thomas whined as he stole a glance at Newt. “We _have_ to win homecoming kings.”

“You're the one bloody ruining it by making goo-goo eyes at her!” Newt pointed out as Thomas started the car.

Thomas laughed and shook his head. “ _Goo-goo eyes?_ ” he mocked and ruffled Newt's hair, giving him a grin with his eyes focused on the road. “Don't worry, I'll still love you the best.”

Newt groaned and slammed his head back on the chair. The rest of the drive was spent with Thomas singing along to whatever that was on the radio.

 

* * *

 

 

Thomas was already making his way to climb the tree as soon as the car stopped and they hopped out, but Newt stopped him and said that his mum was home, he should use the stairs like a _normal human being_. There was a light grumble he heard from Thomas and he mimicked Newt’s words, but the boy followed him inside anyway.

He had expected for his mother to be in the kitchen preparing for dinner, but what he did not expect (not just now, _ever_ ) was Brenda, wearing this ugly, hot-pink coloured apron that he had never seen before, slicing onions with a big smile on her face beside her. She looked up at him, her smile turned into a scowl as she put down her knife. “Well, look who’s home.”

His mum turned around from the stove, strong southern English accent flowing out of her mouth as she spoke. “Newt! How was school today, honey?” he walked over to her to give her a kiss on the cheek.

“It was...” he looked over at Thomas who just walked into the kitchen. Thomas apparently heard his mum and gave Newt a knowing grin. “It was interesting.”

Brenda scoffed behind him, and sliced the onion more viciously, probably picturing it as his head. She knew what they were talking about; he hoped she wouldn’t tell his mum.

“Oh, Thomas is here, by the way. We're going to work on our science project.” Newt informed as he took two cokes from the fridge before making his way out of the kitchen.

“Hey, Anne. Guess what,” He heard Brenda say behind him as he continued to walk, but slowed. “Two new candidates are running for homecoming this year.” Both him and Thomas stopped in their tracks as they got to the foot of the stairs. He turned back, only Brenda visible to him, and he gave her a hard look. _Don’t you dare_.

“Oh, honey. Those two new nominees stand no chance against you.” Anne said cheerily and ran her hand over the dark-haired girl’s cheek. Brenda craned her neck around to give them a sly smirk. Newt rolled his eyes and pulled Thomas up the stairs in a huff.

“What a bloody jerk.” Newt muttered when they reached the top of the stairs. Thomas nodded beside him as they both got into his room.

He might have slammed the door a little harder than necessary.

Newt flopped face first on his bed and groaned. “I hate her _so_ much.” He mumbled against his pillow.

“Yeah, she was kind of...” Thomas trailed beside his bed, finding the right word. “Rude?” Newt let out a snort as he nodded at Thomas.

“My mum loves her because she finally has a little girl to do all that... _shite_ with.” He remembered when his mum was too quiet at dinners of just the two of them, thinking about all she had lost in the past few months. Newt was glad that she'd changed when she met Steve, Brenda’s doting father, even more so when he and Brenda moved in here. As much as Newt hated to admit it, Brenda was the perfect daughter that she needed. His mum was so much happier now.

He sighed as he buried his face further into the pillow, and suddenly felt a strange electric-like current run up and down his spine when Thomas placed a comforting hand on the small of his back.

“Wow, dude. Your body relaxes so much under my touch!” Thomas said in awe, chuckling. He heard Thomas' bag being thrown onto the floor beside the bed, and felt the bed dip a little so he looked up to find Thomas sitting behind him.

“What are you doing?” Newt asked with a raised eyebrow.

Thomas shushed him and pushed his face back onto the pillow gently. Then he felt Thomas' hands on his back again, gently kneading the skin over his shirt. He dug his hand into the knots in Newt's back. “Bloody hell, that feels amazing!”

He heard Thomas let out a chortle as his hands kept working its way up and down Newt's back in circles. He tried to recall the last time he'd had a massage this good, but found nothing. He was glad that he had Thomas as his friend, he was handy when it came to this sort of stuff. _Again with the touching…_

The door swung open and they heard Brenda squeal in disgust, causing both of them to look up at her scrunched up face. “Ew, ew, _ew!_ ” She waved her hands about frantically in front of her. “You two aren't doing _that_ are you?”

Thomas snorted and held back his laugh beside Newt. “Oh, god. Gross! I don’t want to be scarred for life!” Brenda said against the door as she closed it and her footsteps descended down the stairs in a hurry.

“That was funny.” Thomas said after they both laughed. Newt agreed as he sat back up, feeling much better as all the tension in his body was gone. “Well? Was it good?”

Newt nodded and muttered thanks before making his way to the bathroom to wash his face. When he looked down… _oh god,_ he realized that he was half-hard. What the _hell?_

He stood frozen in his place, eyes darting back and forth from the mirror and the small bulge in his pants. Where the hell did that come from? Was it because of the massage? Okay, he might have thought about those porn films where massages turn into sex a _little_. But that didn't mean that Newt was imagining his _best friend_ to be the one he was doing it with.

He squeezed his eyes shut and counted back from five, hoping that _five_ once he opened them that _four_ the bulge would _three_ disappear enough for _two_ him to be able to face Thomas. _One…_

A loud thump from the other side of the room jerked him from his thoughts. It startled Newt so much he nearly let out an embarrassing noise. “Dude, are you jacking off right now? Because I'm gonna order some pizza and load up FIFA.”

“Alright, I'll be out in a sec.” Newt tried his best to sound normal and splashed some water onto his face once again. He looked down and… nope, still there. Maybe it wasn’t that noticeable. He hoped. Newt took deep breaths to calm whatever that was happening _south of the equator_ before walking out. “And I wasn't jacking off, you dick.”

“I better not detect come on the sink, Newt.” Thomas joked before laughing at Newt's horrified expression and threw his phone at him. “You make the call, I want pepperoni.”

When the pizza came, he heard his mum gush about they shouldn't have ordered food since she made dinner. But thankfully she still paid for the bills. “God, your mom is an _angel._ ” Thomas said once there was a slice in his hand and they were sprawled out on both the floor and the bed.

Although they didn't talk about the strange things that had happened today, Newt couldn't help but recall some of it.

First, their speech. Newt had always been a shy person if around people he wasn't close with. But not around Thomas. That boy just had _something_ in him that made Newt felt so comfortable and safe by just being himself. But today changed him a bit. He felt something build up inside him when the crowd cheered for them. He felt good. Confident.

The second thing was the kiss. It didn't even last that long, but Newt still felt it as if he's kissed Thomas a million times before. They angled their heads so easily, their noses side by side, touching like they knew each other's frame, and the way the other moved, perfectly. Everything fit like two puzzle pieces finally being put together. He tried to remember the last time he'd kissed a girl, and remembered it was months ago and they were pretty damn drunk. But it was sloppy and messy and just plain _ugly._ It was nothing compared to this one simple touch of their lips.

It wasn't like Newt was in love with Thomas after the kiss, what he meant was that he wouldn't mind if they'd have to do it again.

Was he fucked by saying that?

The answer would be that he didn’t know _,_ because the third weird thing of today was the fact that he got a little bit hard just from Thomas's touch. That had never happened before. He wouldn't even think about this in the wrong way two weeks ago. The massage was good, yes. And the more Newt thought about it, the more he realised that his little imagination of porn scenarios was not the reason for it.

Then Thomas stood up to gather his things, did their secret-awesome-mega-cool handshake (Thomas had named it that ever since middle school) before Thomas made his way out the window as usual to head home. But the brunet turned around slightly to give Newt a side-smile before disappearing into the night. Newt watched Thomas jump safely from the roof, and didn't move until Thomas's car was no longer visible from his view.

Newt flopped back on his bed with a small sigh. Things were definitely changing now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> both me and ilsa (obliviate1D) apologise for the late update for this. we know it was christmas, but we feel as if we updated way later than we should have. ilsa wrote the majority of this chapter but she is putting school before au's and fics which is why it took so long for her to write and for me to beta and upload. thank you for waiting and we hope to update much sooner in the future! feel free to follow the original au before it's uploaded as a proper chapter on @newtmasfakingit on twitter.


	4. four

The next morning, Newt waited for Thomas at the bus station. His mind raced with thoughts, it had been that way ever since last night. Newt wished for it to stop, but as Thomas approached him, the blond frowned. Something inside his heart screamed at him about how _good_ Thomas looked in his flannel and khakis. His hair was gelled messily, like always, but still made the boy attractive nonetheless.

Newt snorted at the fact that he just _voluntarily_ called Thomas attractive.

“What?” Thomas said, looking at Newt with a slight frown. It came to him that he hadn't said anything the whole time.

“Nothing.” he said quickly before pulling Thomas down to sit next to him on the bus shelter seat. “Mornin’, Tommy.”

“Morning,” the excited tone from Thomas told Newt that the brunet was about to ramble on about stuff he didn't really care about, but of course, Newt listened anyway. “I have found the perfect place for us to buy the suits for homecoming.” Newt only nodded, playing with his nails as Thomas went on and on about how amazing the store was. Then the school bus arrived, Newt saying silent thanks to it’s timing.

Thomas stood up first, Newt following behind. The blond wanted to try something out. From what he gathered from his research last night (he had started googling things after Thomas left, from _'signs that you like someone',_ to _'what the bloody fuck do I do when I probably like my friend while being in a fake relationship with him'._ It was pretty horrible and not much that was all that relevant had popped up), the first sign that meant you liked someone was that you could feel a sort of heat and electric current running through your body when you made skin contact with said person.

Newt challenged himself. He took a seat beside Thomas as other people jumped into the bus. Then finally the vehicle started to move, the sudden jerk made Newt throw his body to the right, and his shoulder and upper arm met Thomas's slightly. The brunet draped an arm around him, asking if he was all right.

Newt regretted looking those things up last night. Because the stupid, fucking electric current and heat _was_ there.

 

* * *

 

When the bus stopped, Newt nearly let out a cry in relief, blowing some of the hair out of his eyes. He stepped over Thomas and walked off the bus, toward the school. Then he felt someone grab his hand, he turned around to find Thomas moping at him. “You left me on the bus!”

Newt shook his head. He really needed to stop this. Eyes trailed from Thomas’ hand on his smaller one, up to the brunet’s eyes once again. He is such a _puppy_ , Newt swallowed, Thomas’ eyes glistening and making him feel bad like they always did.

“Uh, I'm sorry?” Newt tried, but let Thomas hold his hand as they strode toward the school ground. “My stomach hurt.” he reasoned.

“I thought so. I knew something was up. Explained why you didn't say anything the whole time.” Thomas nodded, smiling at Newt in a sympathetic way that made the blond turn away because he didn’t want to blush.

Crowds of people were still approaching them and talking to them. Thomas loved the attention, Newt could tell from the way he lit up at every greeting aimed at him. They had gone from absolute zeroes to school heroes in a day. Newt wasn’t quite as excited as the brunet, but he went along with it, not wanting to let his best friend and fake boyfriend down. God, why did fake smiling at everyone hurt so much?

“Hey, dudes!” Newt recognised Gally’s voice – he was their classmate in wood tech class and not the brightest of souls – as they passed him, “You two… together? That’s actually pretty awesome. You’re cute – I’ll be voting for you guys!”

Thomas thanked him and Newt tugged on him to take a seat on the field, as classes didn’t start for another twenty minutes or so. He didn’t pay attention to the other people that flocked around them like birds, and lay down on the grass, his mind taking him back to what happened last night.

Then Thomas turned towards Newt from beside him and licked his lips, tilting his head to the side. “Do you find me attractive?”

The question startled Newt so much that he sat up, clearing his throat as his hazel eyes scanned the faces around them.

“Uh, that’s a stupid question, Tommy.”

“Dude, we’ve been friends for years, you _know_ that’s not the stupidest question I’ve asked.”

Knowing that a lot of the student population was listening into the school’s new favourite couple, Newt swallowed and nodded, “Yeah, I think you’re good looking."

He wasn’t lying.

Thomas beamed at him; the left side of his face slightly more turned up that the right as his dimple appeared.

“Thanks, Newt.”

He leaned in to press a kiss to Newt’s cheek, lips soft against the blond’s warm skin for a second before he pulled away. He turned and grabbed a book out of his bag, causing Newt to raise an eyebrow.

“What are you doing?” He chuckled and shifted a little bit as Thomas patted Newt’s legs to open them, so he could place himself in between and lie his back against the smaller of the two’s chest.

“I’m going to study and use my boyfriend as a head and back rest.” Thomas looked up at Newt, with a smirk on his face.

Newt was terrified that at that moment as he rested against him, Thomas could hear and feel how much his heartbeat had quickened. He was sure that anyone around them could pick up on the loud thumping in his chest.

“Uh, studying? What for?” He tried to keep his voice as calm as he could.

Thomas peered up at him again, holding the open textbook in his hands, “Science, man! You know, anaerobic and aerobic respiration when running?”

Looking at Thomas’ pupils through long eyelashes, Newt noticed for the first time that his best friend really did have beautiful eyes. Something about them made his chest flutter a little and his stomach knot, both making it hard for him to breathe.

“Newt, are you okay?”

He couldn’t find his voice to answer Thomas, so Newt blinked a few times and nodded. A flash suddenly went off and brought both of them out of their gazing contest, turning their heads to look up and see Minho smiling, holding his phone.

“Damn, you guys are so in love.” The jock laughed to himself as numerable beeps and text tones began to ring all around them.

Newt retrieved his own phone from his pocket when he heard the familiar jingle go off, opening his messages to find the picture of them Minho had just taken had already been edited with the words ‘VOTE THESE LOVEBIRDS FOR HOMECOMING KINGS’ bordering it. Thomas glanced over at the picture and Newt looked up at the Asian before them, Minho throwing a wink his way before walking off.

A wink? What the bloody hell did that mean? Newt pondered, shaking his head to clear himself of the thought when he heard Thomas giggling at the picture.

“We are _so_ cute.” He enlarged the photo a tad with his fingers, chuckling one more time before he picked his book back up and flipped over the page, mumbling science-y stuff to himself Newt didn’t quite get.

They did the exact same thing in their thirty minute break, Thomas nestling into Newt’s chest as he got out his science book to read and test the blond. Most of the time Newt just watched as people walked past, staring and muttering about them and he hoped it was all good things. He occasionally hummed and nodded, staring at Thomas’ blabbering lips.

“So, what’s your answer?” Thomas sat up, turning to face Newt properly with a concerned frown on his face.

“Uh, answer to what?”

“I asked you a question,” the brunet tilted his head, narrowing his eyes a fraction at his best friend who clearly hadn’t been paying attention.

Newt’s chestnut eyes darted from Thomas’ moving lips to the assortment of moles scattered delicately across his face, “Um, could you repeat it for me?”

Rolling his eyes, Thomas repeated, ”What’s the chemical equation for anaerobic respiration?”

He racked his brain for an answer in the little knowledge he had of the subject from class, but all Newt could think about and that kept coming to mind were Thomas’ lips and eyelashes, his moles and that cute little dent in his nose… Oh god, _stop!_ he thought and ran a hand over his face.

“I’m sorry, Tommy. I have no idea.”

Thomas told him the answer: a mix of letters and numbers that Newt regretted not learning sooner because it would be a bugger to learn later, before he added on, “You should pay more attention next time.”

He closed the book and Newt apologised again as the bell rang to signal the end of break. He watched Thomas stand up, stuff the book in his bag and offer a hand to Newt to help him up. Newt missed the warmth of Thomas’ body against his chest so he was grateful for the hand up, and he kept holding it as they made their way to history class.

They took their usual seats beside each other near the back of the class, pulling out the equipment they needed. Their teacher was always late, so Newt tapped his pen on the desk and looked over to his left at Thomas who was sat facing him.

“So, I know you’re also failing math,” Thomas blurted out suddenly, “do you want me to help you out?”

“We’re in history, Tommy. One subject at a time, yeah?” Newt raised his eyebrows as he held up the textbook on the desk to confirm the lesson to his best friend.

“I didn’t mean now,” he watched as Thomas shook his head, chuckling quietly, “I meant later at your place. What do you think?”

Newt placed the book back down on the desk and rolled his eyes, sighing. “Fine, Mister Mathematician. Mine, five o’clock.”

Scoffing at the name Newt had assigned him, Thomas nodded and gave him a thumbs up, “Five o’clock it is.”

Their teacher arrived to their class just after the bell rang and Newt bit his lip. Was it bad that he could barely wait for it to be five o’clock?

 

* * *

 

 

The rest of the day was filled to the brim with lessons and lunch and people asking what they were wearing to homecoming, until it reached the end of the day and Newt let out a sigh of relief. He sped home as soon as the final bell rang signalling that they could leave the building, wanting to give his room a quick tidy before Thomas came over – even though he did most days and this wasn’t really a special occasion.

He went over some of the science stuff he missed (including aerobic and anaerobic respiration), before he jogged downstairs to get some snacks and coke for them when Thomas arrived in a few minutes.

As he made it back to his room, he noticed his phone was buzzing on the duvet signalling someone was calling him. Newt quickly set the snacks and drinks aside on his dresser before he dived for the phone and answered the call.

“Hello?” Newt greeted, not looking at the ID of the caller.

“Hey,” Thomas’ voice sounded through the phone, sounding exasperated, “I may, uh, may be a bit late to the study session we organised – I promise there’s a good reason, but I’ll be there at some point.”

Newt frowned, looking at the clock. It was seven-past-five now, so how long did he expect to be? As he was about to ask exactly that, he heard Thomas gasp and someone moan his name on the other end before the call cut out, signalling the brunet had hung up.

For the next five minutes, Newt held the phone hard to his ear, the only sound being the never-ending hum of the ended call screen. He blinked, mouth wide open. He couldn’t believe it, was Thomas… Newt screwed his eyes up and dropped the phone to the side of him, hands curling into fists before unclenching.

Newt set his phone aside, hugging a pillow to his stomach as he sulked on the bed. He closed his eyes, knowing that Thomas was with _Teresa_ right now somewhere, getting close and intimate and – _ugh!_ Newt sat up and rubbed his face.

“What the bloody hell is wrong with me?” Newt asked himself, sighing.

 

* * *

 

 

Back at the school, Thomas let his phone fall to the ground with a thud. He would worry if it was broken or not later, right now he was a bit distracted.

He grasped Teresa’s face with his hands, forcing his lips against hers hard as she pushed him up against the lockers in the men’s changing room. There was a bolt from one of the doors sticking into his lower back, but Thomas was once again too occupied with kissing _Teresa Agnes_ to care.

“Was that Newt?” The dark haired temptress asked as Thomas moved his lips down to kiss along her jawline, making her run her fingers through his hair, messing it up even more than usual.

“Yeah,” Thomas mumbled against the skin at her throat, completely lost in the moment.

Teresa tugged him up forcefully to crash their lips together again in an obscene kiss. Her fingers continued to play with and run through his hair, one running down to his neck to hold him there as she hummed, “You two are… really cute together.”

“You think so?” He asked as he took a breath, pulling her up, holding her under her thighs as he slammed her against the locker. She wrapped her legs around his waist, nodded to answer and bit her lip before kissing him hard again.

Thomas couldn’t believe his luck when the swim team entered, forcing them to quickly scurry away and cut their make out session short. They escaped to the front of the school, Teresa – in her short skirt, leather jacket and slightly messed hair – pulling him along by his hand until they were alone, out in the open.

She let go of his hand promptly and turned to face him, a small smirk on her face.

“We should do that more often,” Thomas said, only now just catching his breath.

Teresa giggled and raised an eyebrow, tongue visibly poking at the side of her mouth, “As long as your boyfriend’s fine with it, I’m in.”

Thomas ran his hands through his hair to try and tame it a little, but nodded rapidly, “Oh – _yeah_ , he’s _totally_ cool with it! In fact, he has a secret thing like this too… It’s, yeah, totally cool.”

Smiling, Teresa bit her lip and flounced away, leaving Thomas to silently fist pump the air in his triumph. He gave himself a minute to compose himself before checking his watch. He was only, what, fifteen minutes late? The walk would take him ten too, so twenty-five at the latest. It wasn’t that bad, he thought as Thomas jogged to the school exit and began to make his way to Newt’s.

 

* * *

 

 

Thomas felt so happy that he burst into Newt’s room from the window, causing Newt to wake from the sleep he wasn’t aware of.

“Oh, god. Sorry, Newt.” Thomas apologised as Newt groaned and pulled the pillow he’d been clutching to his chest over his face,

He held the cushion there for a while before tossing it aside to sit up and rub his eyes like a young child. “What bloody time is it?”

Newt was awake now as he smacked his lips and watched his best friend pull his phone out of his pocket. The blond narrowed his eyes at the face Thomas made when checking the time.

“It’s uh… six-thirty-two.” Thomas smiled like he knew he’d done something wrong and Newt brought his hands up to his face, kicking all the revision books off the bed.

“That’s an hour and a half late. Tommy, come on. There’s no point in studying now.”

Thomas let out a sorry sigh and sat on the bed beside him, “Newt, I’m really sorry, I just got caught up and it’s a very valid and good reason for me being so late.”

The blond screwed his face up and shoved Thomas’ shoulder slightly, “Yeah, I know you were with that Teresa chick.”

“Oh…” Thomas blinked at Newt a few times, who wasn’t looking at him but staring at his hands, “You, uh, heard us moan didn’t you…”

It was more of a statement than a question, and there was a tone of embarrassment in his voice. Newt nodded, trying not to wince at his best friend’s words. But he sighed and finally looked at Thomas, taking a moment before asking, “How was it?”

“You really want to know?” Thomas raised his eyebrows, the blond noticing that he was already perking up at the chance to talk about it. With that, Newt hesitantly agreed and his best friend’s whole face lit up.

Thomas talked about how he was going to ask to borrow some math books from one of the teachers when someone had pulled him into the guy’s locker rooms. He explained that at first he thought that someone had finally snapped about the whole ‘gay thing’ and was about to beat him up, but… Thomas caught his breath; “instead of attacking me with fists, it was Teresa attacking me with her lips. She just kissed me.”

Newt raised his eyebrows, “And?”

“And it was shucking incredible, Newt. God, her lips were – _are_ perfect, and oh, I think I really turned her on-!“

“That’s great, Tommy,” Newt cut him short, not wanting to hear the rest of his best friend and fake boyfriend’s hook up session with the hottest girl in school.

Thomas stopped talking at that, taking a minute to observe Newt before he asked, “Newt, are you _jealous?_ You only ever cut me off like that when you’re jealous.”

Newt flushed a deep crimson, “No, I’m not-!”

“Because I will back off if you have a crush on Teresa, no matter how much it will pain me.”

The blond had to stop himself laughing at that ridiculous statement. He shook his head, hair splaying out slightly as he did. “I don’t have a crush on Teresa. It’s just what you’re saying is kind of personal and, y’know…”

“But you asked about it! And you’re my best friend I’m _supposed_ to tell you about all the girls I get with!”

Newt rubbed his arm, suddenly feeling guilty at what he had said to Thomas.

“Maybe you should get yourself a secret girlfriend too…”

“What?” Newt choked out, “No! Absolutely not!”

His brain whirred, trying to take in what Thomas had just said. Him? A secret girlfriend? The idea was stupid, but he wondered to himself if it would help him figure out or get rid of these confusing thoughts of his best friend for good. And since _when_ had Teresa named herself Thomas’ Secret Girlfriend?

“Come on,” Thomas pleaded, shaking Newt’s knee with his hand, “I’ll find you someone. I already told Teresa that you had one, so let’s do this, yeah?”

Pulling at the corner of his shirt because it was suddenly rather hot in his room, Newt shrugged. “I-I don’t know, Tommy.”

“You’re _hot_ , man.” Thomas smiled, installing confidence into Newt like only he knew how to do, “Tons of girls will be falling before your feet, ready to jump you at the first chance they get.”

It was his smile, his stupid, heart-warming, _‘trust me, I’ve got this under control’_ smile that made Newt give in, rolling his eyes. “Fine… Find me someone.”

Thomas grinned toothily and nodded, pulling out his phone again in a hurry in his happy mood. “Okay! So, I know a bunch of girls…”

“Oh, do you now, Mr Popular?” Newt raised his eyebrows, shuffling slightly in his seat so he was facing Thomas head on.

“Shut up, and stop with the nicknames,” Thomas chuckled, pressing something on his screen, “So, how about, Harriet?”

The brunet turned his phone around to show Newt the girl’s Facebook profile. He knew her from his social studies class. She was pretty, but not really someone he ever pictured himself dating. Newt shook his head.

“Alright,” Thomas turned his phone back around, clicking on another girl’s profile, then another, then another. Newt rejected all of the options until Thomas announced that the last single girl he was friends with was, “Sonya?”

The phone screen displayed her Facebook profile, the icon being of her smiling brightly, her pretty ginger hair cascading over her shoulders, dressed in what appeared to be a costume from the previous year’s school production of _Les Misérables_. Newt went to open his mouth to protest, but considered the option.

Thomas spotted Newt’s pause and smirked, concluding for him. “Sonya it is. Nice choice, Newt.”

“Thomas, girls aren’t just a pick and mix, you know?” He rolled his eyes and the brunet apologised, asking if he wanted to start their revision now. Newt gave in and nodded, not looking forward to the prospect of studying maths all night.

But they did, and Thomas was continuously scolding Newt for his lack of concentration, when really he was just as bad as he was constantly on his phone.

“Tommy, I’m taking your phone away.”

“Hey, what? Newt, you don’t have to do this!” Thomas complained, but Newt snatched the device away anyway, just as an alert appeared on screen, notifying him of a new text message. It was from none other than Teresa, and Newt’s heart sunk.

The text was… disgustingly flirty, and Newt could hardly look at it. Maybe Thomas had been right earlier, maybe he was slightly jealous. Only slightly. But he hid his envy as he turned his head to Thomas and scoffed.

“I can’t believe this. Days ago you were asking me to be your fake boyfriend so you could win Homecoming, which obviously isn’t as important to you as you make it out to be, seeing as you’re ruining it!”

“I’m not ruining it,” Thomas rubbed the back of his neck after he tried and failed to grab his phone, “I’m just having a sexy secret affair with the hottest girl in school – not to mention the only girl since middle school who’s ever shown a genuine interest in me.”

That caused Newt to shut up. It was true, neither of them had ever dated anyone, not seriously anyway as they were both pretty sure a week of handholding in kindergarten and middle school did _not_ count as a blossoming relationship.

He sighed, “Well, you can talk to your hot girlfriend later. Right now you’re teaching me this stupid trigonometry stuff.”

After a while, Newt and Thomas forgot all about their phones and were back to being themselves before all of the lateness and secret girlfriends happened. They gave up on the homework after twenty questions out of the thirty were completed, and Thomas laughed as Newt drew a fake moustache on his upper lip.

The brunet snapped a picture and announced he was uploading it to Instagram. A mere few minutes after the picture was uploaded, twenty people had already liked it. Thomas smiled, “Woah, popularity really has its perks.”

Newt gazed over Thomas’ shoulder at the screen when the page was refreshed and it stood at thirty-four likes. But it was the comment that made the pair of them burst out laughing.

_FrypanTheMan: are u guys having a mexican mustache kink?!_

The blond rubbed the moustache with the back of his sleeve, causing Thomas to laugh harder as it only made the stain on his skin worse, smudging it into a funny shape.

“You’re such a dork,” Thomas chuckled, raising his thumb up to Newt, “Here, lick this.”

Looking at him in shock, eyebrows furrowed, Newt replied, “Dude, what?”

Thomas nodded, giving his best friend a reassuring look, “Just do it.”

Hesitantly, Newt stuck out his tongue and Thomas quickly ran his thumb over it before Newt felt him attempting to rub away the remaining marker ink from his face. The blond swallowed and let him continue, not able to look away as Thomas pulled a face of concentration, tongue sticking out slightly to the side between his teeth.

“Why did I have to lick your thumb for you to wipe my-?”

“I didn’t know if you wanted my saliva on your dumb face or not.” Thomas pulled at the skin slightly as he rubbed away the last few dregs of pen, “There. All gone, señor.”

Newt swallowed again, still wearing the same face of shock he had the whole time. Did it even occur to Thomas how sexually wrong that was? The licking and the touching… That was on a whole other level. Newt was too stunned to do anything, so he just cleared his throat.

A buzz from Thomas’ phone is what woke them both from their daze, the brunet reaching over to where it lay to check the cause of the alarm.

“Crap, it’s almost ten-thirty. I better go.” Thomas looked from the phone screen, back up to Newt, “We’ll start Project Sonya tomorrow.”

Thomas stood up and again, Newt could barely respond with anything other than a nod. The brunet gave him a weird look, as if he didn’t have his thumb in Newt’s mouth a few seconds ago. “Thanks, Newt. I’ll catch you later.”

The blond opened his mouth to say bye, but instead waved as Thomas opened the window and climbed out onto the low roof and jumped off onto the ground, the darkness of the night seeming to swallow him up.

Newt lay back on his bed, breaths shaky as the events of the evening came back to him. “What the fuck just happened?”

He soon found himself unbuckling his pants, aware of the predicament in his boxers. Newt threw the jeans aside and ripped off his shirt, shoving his hand into his underwear, taking himself in his palm.

Newt had no idea what he was doing. Despite him being a hormonal teenage boy, he had never actually jacked off to anyone before, let alone to the thought of his best friend.

It felt strange, and Newt tried to position himself so that he didn’t feel so awkward, but he decided it was always going to be awkward – he had gotten hard over the thought of Thomas, and that only made him rub himself up and down faster, eliciting small gasps from his throat.

It was all over in a matter of minutes, and Newt came with Tommy’s name on his lips.

Once he had changed and brushed his teeth, Newt curled himself up on his side under his covers and placed his hands under the pillow. Everything was a big confusing blur. He didn’t know what his feelings were doing, but as Newt closed his eyes and began to drift off, he only hoped that whatever Thomas had in store for him in ‘Project Sonya’ tomorrow, would help him clear everything up once and for all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter is a slightly longer one to make up for the said lack of updates these past few weeks. we hope you enjoy. thank you for your continuous support and comments :)
> 
> so, there was a lot going on in this section! what did you guys think? be sure to leave a comment below on any upcoming predictions, etc of what you think is going to happen with thomas/teresa and poor newt
> 
> OOH! and make sure to check out the teaser trailer our friend made for the fic if you haven't already: [right here](https://vimeo.com/119267220)
> 
> obliviate1d/tarantism


	5. five

Both Thomas and Newt dreamed very vividly that night. While Thomas dreamed about him and Teresa back at the locker room – recounting the entire event in slightly more explicit detail than it actually happened – Newt’s dream was fairly different. In what he believed to be reality, he was grasping Thomas’s face tightly, smiling as he kissed him under the covers and used his other hand to run through the brunet’s messy bed hair. They sighed into the kiss, and Newt felt the overwhelming urge to just pull Thomas up against him as close as possible, one hand moving down from Thomas’ moving jaw to his waist.

“Get up, loser!” Brenda’s voice projected into his room along with the loud banging on his door, rousing Newt from his dream. He let out a heavy groan, cursing at her for interrupting the fantasy world he was in during his slumber. “Don’t make that noise when you slept through your alarm! It’s time for school.”

When she closed the door behind her, Newt pulled the covers over his head, groggy and vision cloudy. That dream was too _real_ he could almost still feel Thomas’s lips against his. He didn’t know how or why he had dreamed about them kissing in the first place, but as he looked down at himself, he realized that a part of his body _liked_ it.

Ever since last night, becoming hard over the thought of Thomas didn’t bother him that much anymore. It was still weird, of course, but he didn’t mind. He _was_ a teenager after all; anyone could end up in his wet dream, and it was just a coincidence that it was Thomas, surely.

He showered with cold water rather than hot, knowing it would help to calm his hard on. Once he was done, he wrapped himself in a towel and walked out to grab his clothes quickly, shivering from the temperature of the water. What he didn’t expect was Thomas to be lying on his bed, causing Newt to let out a small yelp in shock.

“Bloody hell, Tommy!” he said, grasping his heart whilst the other hand held his towel tighter around his waist, “Will you ever stop doing that?”

The brunet only chuckled and tossed him his clothes. It was unsurprisingly a set of clothing that Newt usually avoided; he rolled his eyes, too tired to complain, and walked into the bathroom again. He would’ve usually been fine to dress in front of his life-long best friend, but since last night he thought it may be best to change in private. It would be less _weird_.

He pulled the white t-shirt over his head, looking at his reflection in the mirror as Newt smoothed out his top and his hair settled back into place. He couldn’t help but scoff when he realized it was Thomas’s favorite band shirt. He had bought it for him a few months back when the brunet had dragged Newt along to their small concert. It had been a great night and Newt couldn’t help but feel a smile forming on his face.

Shaking the memory off, he let the towel drop and he quickly found his underwear. Pulling it on hurriedly, he made a start on getting changed into the jeans he was given. Newt hadn’t even put both feet into the legs when Thomas banged on the door. “Dude, hurry the fuck up!”

He cursed inwardly; the jeans were stuck on his foot. Newt began to yank on them and turn his back to the door as he hopped up and down to try and pull them up. “Uh, just a second-“ the door was opened all the way before he even finished his sentence. Thomas stood in the doorway, looking at Newt’s ass in tight boxers, jeans suddenly coming unstuck as he drew them all the way up. “Thomas, _what the fuck?_ ”

The mentioned boy only laughed, dismissing him with a hand as Newt – _mortified_ – zipped up his jeans rapidly. “Please, it’s not like I haven’t seen you before. Have you forgotten the fact that we used to shower together when we went to that swim club? You didn’t even have boxers on then. Don’t feel embarrassed.”

 _No,_ he answered to himself. He hadn’t forgot, but still, they were just kids. It was different now.

He bumped his shoulder with Thomas’ a little too harshly on the way out, but smiled anyway. “So,” Newt started, sitting down on his bed to put his socks on, “Why are you in such a rush?”

Thomas leaned on the wall opposite the bed, and Newt noticed that Thomas was wearing the shirt he had worn Minho’s party. The brunet looked up from his phone, probably replying to Teresa’s text. “Project Sonya, remember?”

Ah, Newt had almost forgot about that. He wasn't too keen on doing the stupidly named project, but if he wanted to get over his confusing feelings for Thomas, this was the only way.

Newt finally finished putting on the left sock – his mother always told him to wear the right one first – and stood up. “Where are we meeting her?”

Thomas looked down at his phone, scrolling through something Newt couldn't see, but the blond watched for a second as his best friend’s face screwed up as he read. He took his backpack from under the bed, sliding it over his shoulders easily as the boy across the room locked his phone.

“Apparently, she wants to see us outside of the school.” Thomas said, making his way out of Newt's room. “I was expecting her to make us drive a cool car and pick her up.”

Newt only shrugged, closing the door behind him as he followed Thomas out onto the landing and down the stairs. He bid his mother and soon-to-be-stepfather goodbye, before they made their way to the bus stop.

When Thomas surprisingly took his hand on the way, Newt didn't say anything.

 

* * *

 

 

“So, cupcake-!”

“Never call me that.”

“Right. Newt,” Thomas corrected as they sat on the rickety bus. “I think Teresa likes me. Like, _really_ likes me.”

The stupid statement made Newt turn around with a raised eyebrow. “And what,” Newt said, pinching the bridge of his nose, “made you say that? Doesn’t she have a track record of sleeping around?”

Thomas was silent for a moment, probably agreeing with Newt on the inside. But still, Thomas was a stubborn guy. “Well, whatever this thing is that I'm having with her, I want to keep it.”

Newt dared himself to ask Thomas why, despite the crushing feeling he felt inside. He was glad he also did a research on _How to Hide Your Feelings From Your Crush_ last night. He tried not to sigh, because that was one of the many ways to hide and also brush off your hurt.

“She's a great kisser.”

If Newt wasn't in such a sulky mood, he would laugh. Because _'she's a great kisser'_ sounded so stupid coming from Thomas. He gritted his teeth, annoyed at himself for sounding so damn _jealous_ in his thoughts when he _wasn’t_. Not jealous at all.

Then Newt somehow managed to change the conversation into something he would enjoy more. And minutes later, thankfully, the bus stopped at the school.

They both walked out of the yellow vehicle, holding hands as they strolled to the school ground. Not millimeters away from the bus stop stood Sonya who was wearing a very tight dress, doing wonders for her figure and… Newt blushed, _large bust_.

“Hey, Sonya!” Thomas greeted the girl like they'd been friends for a long time. She gave Thomas a side-hug before turning toward Newt.

“Uh, hi, Sonya.” Newt tried, and she let out a giggle. Such a girly thing to do, he thought, but it made him smile a little until she went in to hug him. At first Newt went to embrace her, but just before they made contact he changed the hug to a handshake, awkwardly chuckling to himself as she frowned, confused.

“Newt… Are you alright?” Sonya tilted her head with a soft chuckle, red hair cascading over her shoulders like a shower of lava.

Newt cleared his throat and nodded, “Uh, yeah! It’s just, um, you… look beautiful today?”

He heard Thomas scoff under his breath beside him, but the blond tried not to react to it. However, Newt wasn’t able to hide the blush slowly creeping onto his cheeks as he readjusted his bag strap, Sonya grinning at him.

Thomas broke the silence between them by suggesting they go inside, clasping both of their backs as he pushed them towards the school. He leant close to Newt’s ear, breath hot against his skin. “Don’t be too obvious, Newt.”

Practically hissing at Thomas as the brunet removed his hand from his back, Newt watched as the brunet departed from his side and made his way to his first class. The blond stood still beside Sonya, remembering that they had citizenship together so they scurried to their class.

Not even a minute after they sat down, Sonya dumped her bag on the floor and leaned over to Newt from the desk beside him. He swallowed and tried to focus on the front of the room and not the sight beside him.

“So,” the redhead hummed quietly as the class filled up, “Thomas told me you have a thing for poly relationships.”

Newt almost choked on thin air as he heard her speak those words, coughing as he turned to her, wide-eyed. He could feel himself beginning to sweat.

“H-He did?”

She nodded, smiling and biting her lip slightly ( _really_ , Newt thought as he raised an eyebrow, suddenly feeling really uncomfortable, she made that face in a room full of people?). Sonya rested her head on her hand, tapping her nails on the side of her face lightly. “Yeah, and I am _so_ down. I think that sort of thing is super hot – like open relationships.”

Taking a deep breath, Newt leant in slightly so his voice wouldn’t be heard so easily. “That’s great… Just, you can’t tell anyone about this.”

She sat up straight and made a symbol with her hands, “I won’t tell – Girl Scout’s honor.”

With that, the lesson commenced and throughout Newt found Sonya touching and chatting with him a lot. It wasn’t important talk, just mindless chatter mainly about her friends and the drama society. Newt felt very self-conscious, especially when she laughed and placed her hand on his upper arm and he found himself seriously regretting ever giving into Thomas on this plan…

When class ended and the teacher dismissed them, Newt couldn’t have been more grateful.

Newt rushed out of the classroom, but groaned when the flood of rushing students blocked his path, meaning Sonya came up behind him. He span and wore as convincing a smile as he could manage.

“So, Newt – Thomas said you wanted to ask me something?” She smiled and Newt found his mouth hanging open as he went to reply.

The familiar flush brushed across his face and he pulled at the collar of his t-shirt as they walked down the corridor. “He did? Well, uh, not anymore… I’ve forgotten so it must not have been that important. I have to get to class, sorry.”

Sonya looked confused for a second before shrugging, turning around to walk off with a slight bounce in her step to class.

Newt sighed, relief sweeping over him before he felt an arm drape around his shoulders.

“Dude!”

He froze on the spot, only his head turning to face Thomas’ seemingly disappointed face: forehead wrinkled, eyebrows furrowed and pouting lips.

“What the hell happened there, man? Did you just chicken out of Project Sonya?”

Newt tutted and lowered his shoulder so his friend’s arm slid off it and back to his side.

“I didn’t ‘chicken out’, Tommy.”

Scoffing, Thomas tilted his head, “Well that’s what it looked like to me. Listen, I-!”

“I have to get to class.” Newt stopped him and scurried off, feeling hurt. He knew Thomas hadn’t meant it in a mean way – in fact, he thought he was doing it for the best – but the attitude of the brunet suddenly made Newt feel sad and at a loss. Like he was heartbroken, however ridiculous that sounded.

“Hey, wait up!” The sound of footsteps approached behind and soon Thomas was by Newt’s side once more, “We have English Lit. together, remember?”

“Right…” Newt drew out and stopped, the brunet walking ahead frowning back at him, “You go on ahead, I just remembered I forgot something from my locker.”

Thomas went to protest, knowing something was up, but instead he nodded and said he’d save Newt a seat before heading for class. The rest of the corridor cleared behind him so only a few stragglers and Newt were left in the halls.

Newt felt himself breathe for the first time in the past hour.

“That Sonya girl seemed… strange.” A quiet voice echoed beside him.

Turning slowly around, Newt spotted the source of the voice in a girl he vaguely recognized, that was closing her locker with her elbow as she clung onto a pile of books. If Newt remembered correctly, her name was Rachel and she had been in his math class last year but she’d moved to the more advanced class… and she was nice, that much he knew.

“Uh, well, yeah. Not my usual type of crowd.” Newt rubbed the back of his neck, walking forward to help Rachel (that was definitely her name, he could see it on the text book) with the masses of school supplies she was juggling in her arms.

Newt took a few of the books from the top of the pile and she thanked him, shoving the ones she had in her bag before slinging it over her shoulder and receiving the others from the blond.

“Sonya is part of the drama society and they’re all a little bit…” she raised her finger to the side of her head and twirled it in a motion that meant ‘they’re all crazy’. Newt chuckled, appreciating the humor.

Once the laughter subsided a second later, Rachel asked if he had English class and Newt nodded slowly, questioning, “How do you know that?”

She smiled, rosy lips making her pretty features light up, “I overheard you and your boyfriend talking.”

“Oh, right.” Newt completely forgot for a while that he had a boyfriend, even if it was a fake one.

Rachel nudged him with her side and said, “let’s go,” before she took off down the hallway in route to the English classrooms.

Frowning, Newt thought to himself, ‘she’s in our English class? How did I not know this?’ but the truth was he didn’t know half of his classmates as he was always preoccupied with Thomas’ crazy antics in any class they shared.

They arrived in class just as the last bell rang and the lesson started, taking seats beside each other as Thomas had tried and failed to save the spot next to him.

The lesson rushed by, the teacher telling them to pair up to work on analyzing one of Poe’s poems and Newt motioned to Thomas that he was going to group up with Rachel, much to the brunet’s dismay and the puppy dog face Newt hated so very much.

He got on with Rachel well. She was smart and Newt enjoyed how easy it was to talk to the girl. So by the time the teacher told them to pack up, the blond was completely shocked at how fast the time had gone by.

Rachel waved goodbye to Newt as she scurried from the classroom alongside the other pupils, leaving Newt to shove various worksheets and textbooks into his bag as Thomas slammed his hands down on the table and smiled. The blond retracted his hand from the wave back at her when he noticed his best friend.

“So, who was that?” Thomas asked quizzically, hovering over Newt’s shoulder.

“Rachel.” Newt zipped up his bag and stood up, slinging the rucksack over his shoulder. “Don’t ever try to pick up girls for me again.”

Thomas fell into step beside Newt as they made their way out of the classroom, frowning in confusion at what the latter had just said. Newt caught the look on his face and rolled his eyes.

“Sonya,” he whispered, leaning in close as the corridors erupted with students heading for lunch to make sure no one heard, especially the redhead herself, “she was awful.”

The brunet laughed and threw his head back, “Oh god, dude, I am so sorry.”

Newt couldn’t help but laugh at the wondrous sight of Thomas laughing. It was a joy to experience and it was infectious, even when the butt of the joke was him.

“But,” Newt added once his breathing calmed down and the laughter subsided, “I think that Rachel could possibly be secret girlfriend material.”

Grinning, Thomas clapped Newt on the back and smiled widely at him, “I’m glad you finally found your girl, Newt.”

A feeling of excitement washed over Newt but soon subsided once Thomas’ hand trailed from his back, down to grasp at his hand, giving it a slight squeeze before they walked toward the cafeteria.

 _It’s just for show_ , Newt kept telling himself. _Just for show_. 

The various greetings and smiles came their way as they walked through the school and ended up in the canteen, approaching an empty table before they took a seat. As Newt began to sit, he spotted Brenda across the room, eyes cold and hard as she glared at him.

Thomas apparently saw it too, as he leaned in close to Newt’s ear, making the blond shiver as he said, “Ignore her.” 

Newt nodded stiffly, turning away from his soon-to-be stepsister, only to spot Teresa waving her wingers at them from the front of the food line. He turned his gaze to his side, his eyes falling upon Thomas sitting, mouth hanging agape at her. 

Moving his hand up to shut his jaw, Newt turned Thomas’ face towards him. “Don’t gawp, Tommy. You’ll catch flies.”

The brunet blinked a few times before his mouth was open again in disbelief, “but, Newt – she’s _hot_.”

Newt sighed, feeling his ears suddenly burn hot and prickly. He bit the inside of his cheek and folded his arms on the table, trying to convince himself that he was not jealous of Teresa. His gaze fell to the table, a hand going up to rub away the new heat on the back of his neck.

“Well, I’m your boyfriend so I must be hotter.”

His gaze didn’t meet Thomas’ for a second or two after he muttered those words, but once he looked up, Thomas had turned his head only slightly back towards him.

“Yeah, you’re hot but she’s…”

Newt frowned at the half-gasping noise that protruded from his fake-boyfriend’s mouth, but as the blond opened his lips to add something else, Thomas excused himself and waddled over to Teresa’s side. Newt sighed and turned away once the subject of Thomas’ fantasies flicked a long strand of midnight black hair behind her shoulder and grinned at the brunet. They abruptly left the canteen and the blond rested his hand on his palm with a long sigh.

“Dude, if you’re going to start crying right now, it better be because you’re jealous.”

The voice startled Newt a little, but he watched as Minho slipped into Thomas’ absent space, only a bottle of some kind of energy drink in his hand.

“Wh-What do you mean ‘jealous’?” Newt scoffed, trying to pretend he hadn’t just seen his best friend sneak off with Teresa, the hottest girl in school and possibly the whole of Denver. He picked at a fry on his plate, only to drop it soon after when he realized he was no longer hungry.

The buffer boy shook his head, dropping his gaze from Newt with a small smile, “Whatever, it doesn’t matter. I can read people pretty well.”

Newt swallowed, wanting to yell at him then and there because of how he had ‘read Newt’ at the party and that was how all this complicated nonsense had begun in the first place. But he didn’t, instead he looked toward the food line again and spotted Rachel’s mousy locks in the line.

The pair made eye contact and Rachel smiled, waving her free hand at him as the other held onto a black tray. Newt prompted for her to come over once she’d gotten her food and she nodded, moving forward in the line. 

The blond heard a huff and he turned to see Minho sitting with a raised eyebrow, sipping his drink. “That your new beard?”

“I… No, she’s just a friend.” Newt stammered, not wanting to explain Thomas’ whole secret girlfriend project to the boy who had presumed the pair of them were dating in the first place.

“That’s good.” Minho smiled and began to pick at Newt’s uneaten fries when the blond had pushed them away. He took a few and nodded at Newt before Minho departed from the table in time for Rachel to join the blond.

Placing her tray on the table, Rachel took her seat and chuckled a little, looking around at her surroundings. “The cafeteria is like a watering hole for dangerous animals – I usually don’t come here.”

Newt found himself chuckling at her comment, agreeing wholeheartedly. It really was a wild place to be – people pushing and fighting all around for the best food and best tables, and the chatter was so loud that even people with the faintest of hearing could make out the whispers from the hall.

Nodding, Newt laughed, “Yeah, but the food’s decent – it almost makes it worth the risk of getting torn apart. Almost.”

His reply made Rachel giggle quietly as she played with her food, and Newt noticed that she had pretty eyes underneath her fake, long lashes. Thomas’ stood up on their own, long and beautiful, framing his doe eyes.

Rachel tucked her hair behind her ear and he noticed that she was turning a deep shade of rouge. 

“It’s sad really, that someone as kind, easy to talk to and as handsome as you doesn’t know he is all those things.”

The stray chip that Newt had put in his mouth during her comment suddenly felt as if it were lodged in his throat.

“And just my luck… I finally find a guy I like in this school and he turns out to have a boyfriend.”

He couldn’t believe his ears, the chip slowly coming dislodged as he coughed a little to clear his awkwardness and the silence around him. But, Newt continued to stare blankly at her as Rachel covered her face a little with her petite hands.

Pulling at his shirt’s collar, Newt asked bluntly, “You like me?”

“I kind of have for a while. You’re just sweet and nice and… why wouldn’t I fall for a guy like you?” She confessed, holding her burning cheeks in her hands.

Newt was in total disbelief, unable to process what had just been said. He also felt guilty for only getting to know her so recently, when she had been crushing on him for a while. He gulped. Maybe Thomas’ project thing hadn’t totally failed… he did like Rachel and that was something he could work with, right? He only had to tell her the truth… 

“I, uh, well-!” Newt began, stopping suddenly as he was interrupted by a loud yell and the sight of a slice of pizza being chucked across the room. Less than a minute later the cafeteria was in a full-out food fight.

Newt ducked and covered his head with his hands, grabbing his bag as he jumped out of his seat. Dipping, ducking and dodging, he darted for the door as the chaos ensued. He was lucky to make it to the corridor with what he thought was only a few minor splashes and _splots_ of tomato sauce.

Rachel followed his trail swiftly, running into him as she bolted through the cafeteria doors laughing loudly. She straightened up and burst out into louder laughter when she saw the state of Newt: breadcrumbs and spaghetti tangled in his already untidy hair.

“You’re a mess!”

She reached up to pick out the bits of food as he chuckled under his breath, the commotion of the food fight still at it’s optimum just behind the doors to their left. Once Rachel had gotten most of the junk out of his hair, the pair made their way down the empty corridor, chatting about what had happened for a while.

They had just turned the corner onto another long stretch of hallway when Newt looked at Rachel, only to see straight past her into the classroom behind at two figures pressing close to one another.

Newt watched as the male figure pinned the girl to the front desk, pulling off her ugly blue sweater – the same one Teresa had been wearing in the canteen. As the male pulled back, Newt’s eyes widened at the sight of Thomas diving in to kiss at the girl’s neck.

The blond snapped, unable to watch anymore of the messy ordeal. Newt heard Rachel ask him what was wrong as he scurried away, only to hear her gasp a few seconds later, signifying to him that she had seen the incident as well.

 

* * *

 

 

Back in the geography classroom, Thomas gasped and pulled back as Teresa reached down to unbuckle the belt holding up his jeans. The brunet let out a breathy laugh and looked at her through his long lashes, going to connect their lips again _just_ as the bell rang.

Their foreheads rested together until Teresa pulled away to put her sweater back on, leaving Thomas to groan and fiddle with his belt.

“I hate bells _so_ much.”

He felt a soft yet cold hand touch his cheek and Thomas looked up at Teresa before she pressed a quick peck to the corner of his mouth.

“We’ll pick this up again later.”

Thomas watched as she strutted out of the room, leaving him there to compose himself and explain why the hell he was in the room when the geography teacher came in to set up. He apologized and left quickly, smiling to himself as he went to his next class.

 

* * *

 

 

When classes cleared for the end of the day, Newt left his last lesson and headed for his locker. He opened it forcefully, a stern look on his face as he shoved his books back in and retrieved his coat from inside.

“Woah, Newt. Are you okay?” Thomas’ voice appeared beside him, the brunet leaning against the locker to Newt’s left.

“Really, Thomas?” Newt closed his locker as Thomas made his way towards his own locker only a few doors down. “Fucking really? This was _your bloody idea_ in the first place and you’re going off to have secret make out sessions in classrooms with Teresa!”

Thomas tried to tell Newt to calm down and lower his voice as people began to fill up the corridors to leave the school.

“How _bloody dare you_ drag me into this and then hurry off with her?” Newt continued with a scowl on his face.

Taken aback by what Newt said – well, _shouted_ – Thomas shook his head, retorting as the ruckus of people died down, “Are you fucking serious right now? Are you mad because I have a crush on the hottest girl in school and she seems to like me back too? Are you mad because I’m just a normal teenage boy with needs?”

Newt bawled his fists up, not usually a violent person, but Thomas slammed his locker shut before he could move.

“You should eat some of that food left in your hair. You’re always _cranky_ when you’re hungry.”

Thomas stormed off, leaving Newt fuming on the spot. He punched his locker, immediately regretting it when pain shot across the knuckles as he retracted his fist.

“Fuck you, Thomas!” He shouted after the brunet as he saw the back of his best friend disappear through the exit at the end of the corridor. Newt swallowed and slumped against his locker, bringing his hands up to hide his face as he breathed out, trying to let the anger go.

He heard faint footsteps approach him and then a small finger tap his shoulder. The blond dropped his hands to his sides to see Rachel looking at him concernedly, eyes sad.

“Newt, are you okay? I heard you shouting and then you were out here looking like something had happened and I wanted to see if-!" 

Newt didn’t know what came over him, but before he could convince himself that it was a bad mistake, he took Rachel’s face in his hands and brought his lips to hers in a kiss. He felt her stiffen at first, but then relax under his touch. Snaking a hand around her waist, Newt opened his mouth against hers and went to deepen the kiss by adding tongue, but he felt no spark, nothing.

The final measure he took, Newt pulled her up and pinned her to the locker… but still there was nothing there. Just a small warming feeling in the pit of his stomach, nothing on the scale of what he felt the first time he and Thomas had spontaneously kissed in front of their peers.

He pulled back immediately after letting her stand once again, but kept his hands on her face a second longer as they caught their breath. Newt looked into her eyes as she opened them, a small but confused smile forming on her lips.

“I-I’m sorry…” He muttered as he let her go, pulled his bag on and walked away from her speedily. He didn’t turn around, too afraid to look at Rachel’s hurt expression as he walked further and further away from her, out of the school.

Blinded slightly by the light, Newt bumped into someone as he walked out and apologized to whoever it was. Once his eyes adjusted, he wanted to take his apology back as he saw Teresa looking back over her shoulder at him. He pushed forward and ran the rest of the way home.

 

* * *

 

Once Newt was in bed – or more like on it in a mess of blankets and pillows – he finally let the tears he had been building up fall. He had no idea why he cried, but he felt so inexplicably angry and betrayed.

He buried his face deeper into the pillows, asking himself over and over why he hadn’t felt anything. He was _meant_ to feel something when kissing a girl – a girl he very much liked. But he hadn’t.

Another tear slipped from his eye and disappeared into the fabric of the pillow, sniffing as he rolled onto his back and ran his hands through his hair until he just held them there.

Was it true? Could he really be falling for his own best friend? Newt asked himself. It was the only possible explanation for any of what he was feeling at this moment, and he hated himself so much for letting this happen. He hated the whole faking it ordeal. He just wanted Thomas, his stupid, dorky _best friend_ and the way they were before, back.

But now, he questioned whether he wanted Thomas as a best friend or if he really wanted more.

“Newt, have you seen your mom’s-!” Brenda unexpectedly walked into the blond’s room, stopping as she saw Newt sniff once more and attempt to quickly wipe away the tears from his eyes before she saw.

She stepped further into his room and approached his bed slowly, head tilted to the side. “Why are you crying? Did your boyfriend abandon you?”

Although her tone was mocking, a concerned look on her face betrayed her, clearly worried that something was seriously wrong with her stepbrother-to-be. She wasn’t an ice queen after all, Newt thought.

“I’m not going to talk about it with you,” Newt rolled his eyes, grabbing a pillow to his side to cover his face with.

A dipping sensation in the mattress alerted Newt to the fact that Brenda had jumped on his bed, alongside the sudden bashing sensation as she hit him with the second pillow.

“Tell me! Come on, tell me!”

Brenda soon abandoned the pillow and Newt wailed out a laugh as she attacked his sides with her fingers in a vicious tickle. He flailed his limbs in an attempt to get her to stop, but she laughed along with him, enjoying seeing Newt completely helpless, but also seeing him smile as he cackled.

Newt tried his very hardest to quell his laughter but he couldn’t help but gasp out, “S-stop it, Brenda! My insides are going to b-burst!”

Luckily for him, she ceased her attack and sat comfortably on his bed.

“Okay, truce – as long as you tell me what’s wrong.” Her voice was hard again and Newt swallowed, the moment of sibling bonding over a tickling session suddenly scary and not light-hearted anymore.

Newt was certain that she would go blabbing to all her ‘popular’ friends about his problem, so sighed, “You wouldn’t understand.”

He couldn’t tell her. There was little mutual trust between either of them, and besides, Newt didn’t want to risk her exposing him before homecoming was over.

The brunette pouted and Newt felt guilty for a second. Before high school and they had moved in together, things hadn’t been too bad between them – they had been happy for their parents finding each other, but once they shared the same house things just became difficult, and he didn’t know why.

“Whatever,” Brenda said, trying to sound like she didn’t care as she shuffled off of the bed and left the room. She reappeared in the doorway a second later however to add, “If that Thomas boy hurts you, I’m telling Anne and I will not be held accountable for my actions.”

“I thought you hated the idea of us together.” Newt raised an eyebrow at her, hugging a pillow to his chest.

She shrugged, tapping painted red nails on the doorframe, “Only because you’re stealing my crown.”

When Brenda disappeared again, Newt felt a small smile tug at the corners of his mouth. He made a promise then and there to himself that he would try and mend his relationship with his soon-to-be stepsister after homecoming. He had always wanted a sister, and she was the closest he was ever going to get – he didn’t want to mess it up forever.

After changing his pillowcases so they weren’t sopping wet from his tears, and sorting out the assortment of blankets he had on his bed, Newt retired to his bed for an early night’s sleep.

He was exhausted from the mayhem of the day, and prayed that a little sleep would sort out any thoughts and emotions of Rachel and Thomas that ran awry in his brain so he was ready to face the next day when he woke. It was a long shot, he knew, but the thought lulled him to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> super un-beta'd at the moment so we apologise for any mistakes and we are so sorry for the lateness of this chapter! a mix of writers block on both our behalfs and some personal problems but HERE WE ARE. apology for the weird ending but hopefully the next chapter will pick up nicely for you all!
> 
> a little angst in this chapter and the appearance of one of my favourite lines from the show with a little adjustment woo cranky heh
> 
> thank you so much for the continuing support of the faking it au :)
> 
> watch the trailer for the fic here: [faking it au trailer](https://vimeo.com/119267220)
> 
> tarantism


	6. six

To Newt's unfortunate surprise, Brenda was the one to wake him up once again the next morning (it was becoming a habit of his, sleeping through his alarm after a night of intense thinking and emotions, swirling around like a typhoon in his head).

"Get the fuck up!" His almost stepsister yelled from the doorway, the drumming of her nails and tapping of her foot making Newt's head ache.

"Can't," Newt fake coughed, turning over under his covers, "I'm sick."

A moment later the blond was shuddering from the cold, as Brenda yanked his duvet off him and threw it to the floor. He curled up into a ball but managed to peer out at the brunette through the tangle of limbs by his face.

"You're not sick, now get up." She pushed his legs slightly so they fell off the bed, prompting Newt to stand as she waltzed out of the room and down the stairs, her mission complete.

Newt groaned, rubbing his eyes like a little boy of about five years, as he dragged himself lazily to the bathroom, ready to complete his usual morning routine.

He regretted looking in the mirror as soon as he did, mouth contorting to a grimace as he saw how red and puffy his face had become after he had cried last night.

"Shit," he sighed, making his way to the shower to quickly rinse himself, then back out to the sink to douse his face with cold water in an attempt to get the skin to resemble what it usually did. To his relief the puffiness did decrease in intensity, but even still if you looked at Newt directly you could tell he'd had a rough night prior. He was glad all the same - he didn't want to look weak if he came face to face with Thomas.

Sighing, Newt styled his hair a little and dried himself with a towel before he reentered his room and got changed into an outfit for the day. He hurried as much as he could, stuffing what books he thought he had lessons for that day in his backpack, before he scurried down the stairs and out of the house much earlier than usual. He wasn't afraid to admit that he did this to avoid a journey to school with Thomas, and besides, he was starting to get used to getting to school early - it was the brunet's fault if he didn't catch him.

 

* * *

 

Newt strolled around the half-empty school football field, kicking tufts of grass up as he did to pass the time. A few people asked him where Thomas was, to which he replied he didn't know and eventually retreated into the halls of the school, making his way to his locker.

The first school bell rang as Newt pulled out a book he needed for his first lesson, a familiar voice chattering away alerting him to his presence. The blond slightly turned his head to look down the corridor, regretting doing so when he saw Thomas approaching him, in a full-on conversation with none other than Teresa Agnes. It was the brunet's huge smile that irked Newt the most, as if their row yesterday hadn't even happened - or as if it didn't phase Thomas at all.

Thomas spotted his best friend and muttered something to Teresa before making his way over to Newt, just as the latter closed his locker and began to zip up his bag. Newt glared at the approaching figure, turning to walk down the crowded corridor. He turned into science, taking a seat on a laboratory table to the side of the room, making the mistake of sitting at an empty desk.

He heard the clearing of a throat beside him and Newt didn't look up from taking his books out of his bag, opening them to the correct pages on the table.

"Hey..." Thomas said softly, rubbing the back of his neck. Newt only turned his back to him, feeling himself beginning to grit his teeth.

Newt still refused to answer until Thomas moved from the seat and knelt in front of the blond, peering up at him past the shaggy blond locks.

"Newt?"

"Go away, Thomas." Newt picked up all his books and his bag, sliding out of his chair to move to a table at the back that was already full with two other people, so there was no chance of Thomas taking a seat beside him.

Even still, Thomas moved a chair from in front to beside him, folding his arms on the table in a non-threatening way. Newt had to give him points for his persistence.

"Newt, please talk to me. I'm so-!"

"Mr Murphy, please return to your proper seat, not a new one you created to sit next to Mr Isaacs." The teacher spoke as she entered the room, and Newt bit the inside of his cheek as he watched Thomas move back to the desk in front, glancing back at his best friend occasionally.

The glances kept occurring throughout the lesson and about halfway through, Thomas began to send notes back to him, even when the bunsen burners were out. Newt shook his head and scolded him, refusing to read what he had written as he stuffed the paper into his bag. A final note was passed when the bell rang and the class was dismissed, depositing the lab goggles into their containers on the way out.

Every lesson they were in together (three of the five they had that day) Thomas attempted to get Newt to talk to him by sending notes, and by the end of the day the blond's bag was overflowing with scrunched up bits of paper he hadn't peeked at.

He drove home fast, wanting to escape the clutches of school and most importantly his seemingly omnipresent, ever-insistent best friend.

Once in his room, Newt headed straight for his bed and flopped onto the mattress, closing his eyes as he sighed and rested there for five minutes. He then got up to sort out his bag for the next day.

Newt crossed his legs in front of the bag on the floor, emptying the contents on to the white carpeted floor. Endless bits of paper fell out one by one, _klunk klunk klunk_ , until finally his books landed flat on top of them. As he removed the books, his hazel eyes scanned the floor and Newt was sure there were at least one hundred scrunched up notes from Thomas scattered all around him.

Biting his lip, Newt reached out for one in the middle with his small, slim hand, his fingers brushing the paper when he heard a loud rapping at the front door. He jumped slightly, leaping up to run to his wardrobe, pulling down an old bag he never used from a shelf there. He stuffed all the notes inside as the knocking continued, placing the bag back into the closet before he retreated downstairs.

The blond hop-skipped down the stairs, a slight frown on his face. His mum and Brenda weren't due home for a while due to work and after-school activities, and Steve rarely returned home before eight most days - it was only four in the afternoon. Besides, they all had keys to the house. Newt secretly hoped it was Thomas.

"Newt? You there?"

Newt tilted his head to the side as he reached to unlock the door, remembering that if it were Thomas he would've used the window to enter - no matter how much Newt wished he used the front door. But the brunet also knew where the spare keys were, and he was allowed to let himself in as he was practically family.

Opening the entrance wide, Newt was greeted with a small smile from none other than Minho. It was a pleasant surprise - and unexpected, to say the least.

"Minho?" Newt questioned, holding onto the wood of the door.

"Hey," the Asian tapped his foot, eyebrows raised and hands securely in the pockets of his trousers, "can we talk?"

Newt furrowed his own eyebrows, opening the door wider for his friend to enter. "Yeah, uh, sure. Come in."

After offering Minho all the traditional welcoming traditions like a drink and a snack, the pair made their way upstairs to Newt's room, cans of soda in their hands.

"Is everything okay?" Newt asked as he shut the door behind them, watching as Minho took a seat on the edge of the blond's bed and took a sip of his recently opened drink.

When he had swallowed the liquid, Minho lowered the can to his lap and tapped the side of it with his finger. "This is going to sound super blunt - but is everything okay between you and Thomas? Because in science I'm almost ninety-eight percent sure that you were ignoring him, the other two percent is put on you being a tease. Seriously though, you guys are still dating, right?"

Newt didn't look Minho in the eyes as he leant against the door for a while, making his way over to sit beside the buffer boy when he finally decided to answer.

"I don't know, I mean... yes? I think?" The blond paused, completely unsure at what was happening between him and Thomas, "It's complicated, Minho."

 "You guys can't break up before homecoming!" Minho put his drink down and - to Newt's millionth surprise that day - took the other's hands in his own, "You can pull through this because hell, I'm not going to see another one of those stupid popular kid couples being crowned King and Queen again this year."

"You mean like my sister?" Newt managed to chuckle a little, looking at Minho as he smiled. The blond soon slouched over again however, huffing out a sigh. "I'm trying hard to keep us together, I really am. I... just saw something and I don't know what it means for us. I don't know if I can do this anymore. I hate complicated."

Letting go of Newt's hands, Minho sat back slightly and folded his arms before saying in a gentle voice, "I'm all ears."

That was when Newt decided that he _needed_ to tell someone about what had been happening, even someone as gossipy as Minho - the person that had given Thomas the idea to make Newt go along with this in the first place. He didn't know if the boy would believe what he was about to say, but he knew it was worth a shot and would let some of the weight off his chest.

"I have to tell you something," Newt muttered, swallowing back the nerves, "but you have to _promise_ not to tell a soul!"

Newt rolled his eyes with a small smile on his face as he watched Minho silently cross his heart and lean in to listen.

After a final moment of composure, Newt admitted, "Me and Thomas are faking it."

Minho didn't say anything for a good minute, the blond looking into his eyes until he heard his friend say, "What?"

"When you announced at the party that me and Thomas were a 'thing', we weren't. Never were." Newt said slowly, watching the boy as he frowned and took all the information in.

"So you two..." Minho trailed off, pointing a finger between Newt and thin air, which Newt presumed was where Thomas was meant to be. He obviously wasn't entirely convinced by the statement. "You weren't together this whole time? _Wow_ , maybe I can't read people as well as I thought. Damn. But what about the kisses? Those couldn't have been fake."

Newt hung his head, staring at his hands as he twiddled his thumbs. "After that first kiss I wasn't sure what to think, my emotions were a bloody mess - and Thomas kept sneaking off to be with Teresa, so I thought I'd get myself a secret girlfriend too. But when we kissed..."

Newt timidly looked back up at Minho, trying to stop his eyes from glassing over, tears beginning to form. He was unusually emotional as of late and he hated it, he felt so hopeless.

"When you kissed you didn't feel anything." Minho finished Newt's sentence, the blond nodding as the first tear rolled slowly down his pale cheek.

"What's happening to me, Minho? Why didn't I feel anything?" The frustrated tone of his voice scared Newt himself, more tears falling and he tried harder to stop them by biting down on his lip.

"So you were only pretending to be in love with him?" The raven-haired boy asked, now beginning to understand his friend's situation, starting to feel bad.

"Thomas is," Newt started, taking a deep breath as he choked out the words, "but I'm not so sure about myself anymore."

A hand on the blond's back calmed him a little, but he still felt shaken.

Minho asked why he's changed his mind and Newt thought about it, questioning himself as to what it was. Was it their first kiss? Possibly, but the more he thought about it, sure it was an incredible feeling, but Newt knew it was not the main reason why.

"I guess it was when I saw Thomas and Teresa... making out."

Silence filled the room for a second and Newt could feel his heart beating out of his chest. It felt as if all his hurt and confusion had merged together, taking the form of an animal that was trying to claw its way out of him. The pain was vivid and he only stopped focusing on it when Minho rubbed his hand up and down on his back, the feeling soothing.

"Have you told him any of this?" Minho asked, not ceasing the calming movement.

Newt leaned away from him slightly, frowning at him. "Of course I haven't! Why the bloody hell would I?"

He threw his arms up and then held his head in a hand as the other fell to his lap, sighing, "I am so screwed. We've been friends since I first came to America and I can't ruin that."

"But Newt," Minho spoke again, hand on top of the one on the blond's thigh, "you have to think about your feelings too, about your happiness and not just Thomas'."

Jerking his hand away from the touch, Newt stood up and began to pace in front of his friend before eventually walking to stand and look out of his window. He tapped his chin with a long slender finger, contemplating what he was to say.

"I have to think about the bigger picture, and maybe this will pass once we end this. Who knows?"

Newt craned his neck to look over his shoulder, noticing that Minho was shaking his head, an unusually sad expression on his face. "No, Newt, things like this don't just come and go that easily. Trust me, I've been there, and if you're into Thomas the way I think you are that's going to be tough to let go of. And I just want you to accept this and be happy.

"I want you to be who you are with or without Thomas." Minho stood up, moving slowly towards Newt. It reassured the blond slightly, grateful that he had someone to talk to and get advice from.

Turning around to lean on the wall adjacent to the window, Newt crossed his arms and scuffed his foot on the floor. "I don't even know if I am _gay_ or whatever. I've never really had much interest in anyone until now - at least, not on this scale."

"Maybe you're _Thomasexual_ ," Minho smirked, coughing a little to put back on a straight face in the serious situation.

However, Newt smiled at the word and chuckled, "maybe," before he went to sit back on his bed, reclining on the mattress so his legs dangled over the edge.

"I just don't know what to do, Minho. Thomas convinced me to do this so he could feel popular and have friends and win homecoming king, but all he does is go off to have make out sessions with Teresa at every moment possible! - I'm pretty sure he used a toilet excuse to go meet her outside the changing rooms at one point."

"Woah, Newt - easy there! You're going bright red in jealousy. You need to breathe." Minho once again joined Newt on the bed and the blond sat up, taking a breath as instructed. "I can talk to Thomas for you If you want me-!"

"No!" Newt turned to Minho, eyes pleading, "Don't talk to Thomas about this. I can figure it all out after homecoming."

The raven-haired boy ran a hand over the back of his neck, blinking as he stared at Newt. "You're still doing this then? For him? You're still going to continue the charade even after what he's put you through?"

Newt bit his lip, letting out a deep sigh, "I don't really have a choice. Homecoming is in two days and then after that we can pretend none of this ever happened."

The blond caught sight of his friend staring at him sadly, guilt-ridden. "Are you sure this is what you want?"

Nodding, the lankier of the pair slumped over, "Nothing could ever happen between him and I, Minho. I don't want to ruin our friendship."

Minho continued to rub the back of his neck and occasionally eyes too as he gritted his teeth. "Man, this is all my fault. If I had just kept my shuck mouth shut at that party..."

"No, don't you dare blame yourself," Newt placed a soft hand on the boy's muscly upper arm before he stood and paced again, "I was weak and couldn't control my feelings."

The Korean watched the Brit's steps back and forth, rubbing his hands together as his head hung low. "Yeah, but I called you out and If I hadn't then none of this would've happened, dude."

"Please, Minho. Stop apologising, this isn't just you."

"I'll stop apologising if you stop pacing and stop thinking about it so much."

He agreed, letting out a breath as Newt retook a seat on the bed. Instead of pacing, he began to fidget, playing with his fingers and some of the lint on his jeans. He could feel Minho's gaze on him and his breath lightly teasing the side of his face. The blond turned slightly and tried to smile at Minho to show his appreciation. But what the boy said to him next caused him to gawk.

"You can, uh," Minho chuckled to try and clear the ridiculousness of the suggestion, "you can try kissing me if you want - to see if you feel anything. Purely as an experiment, of course."

Not knowing how to respond, Newt just sat there in a frozen state. He realised after a while that Minho was serious, but his intentions were good - the only problem was that he had no idea how to respond to him. The blond saw Minho raise his eyebrows as if to say, "well?", but still Newt just bit his lips, unsure of what to do.

But then Minho began to lean forward slowly, one hand coming up to delicately tilt Newt's chin upwards before their lips pressed together softly. And Newt felt his heart beat faster and the sensation was like a furnace being lit inside of him - much more than the dull flame he got when kissing Rachel.

Minho's lips were slightly rougher than Thomas', but Newt seemed to like kissing them just fine, enjoying the varied pressure that his friend ( _kiss_ buddy?) added as their mouths moved together. He even went to curl a hand around the boy's neck to deepen the embrace a tiny bit more.

Newt felt strong hands resting lightly on his waist, and he gasped as Minho tilted his head to the side and ran his tongue along the blond's lower lip. The prior went as far as to call himself breathless at that point, trying his best to replicate and respond to what his friend was doing.

The blond definitely wasn't as experienced at kissing as Minho _clearly_ was, and as he started to get a hang of the stride of the kiss, he heard keys fall to the ground behind them. The noise startled the pair and they broke apart, hands lingering until they too fell to the side.

In the open doorway stood Thomas, warm chocolate eyes and mouth open wide in shock at what he had just seen.

"What the _fuck_?"

Newt was completely frozen and couldn't say a word with the way Thomas was looking at him - he couldn't read the brunet at all at that moment in time, and that truly terrified him. He had always been able to tell what was going through his best friend's mind, but as of late he seemed to had lost touch with that ability and that saddened him.

"Hey, Thomas! Did you let yourself in, bud?" Minho broke the silence as if nothing had just happened, going to pick up his drink and take a sip happily from the top of the can.

Newt watched as he saw Thomas glaring angrily at the boy beside him, obviously acting that way as he thought that Minho didn't know they were faking it.

"Why the hell were you kissing my boyfriend?"

The blond heard Minho snort and watched as the Asian folded his arms, replying, "What? You jealous or something?"

Thomas scowled, trying his best to act angry at Minho for kissing Newt. "You've crossed the line, Minho."

"Oh yeah? Well your _boyfriend_ here was crying. And where the hell were you, Thomas, huh?" Minho pressed on, standing up as if to defend the blond that was still sat on the bed, playing with his fingers nervously.

Frowning in a mix of confusion, fury and worry, Thomas looked past the buffer boy at his best friend. "Crying? Wait, Newt - this isn't to do with me, right?"

Newt's heart sunk and he managed to pry his lips open to mutter, "Don't flatter yourself, Thomas."

There was a seriousness in Newt's voice that Thomas seemed to understand, letting his attacking stance fall to a normal, standing one. He outstretched his hand towards the blond, "I-I'm sorry, Newt. I was-!"

"Don't say anything. After homecoming, this," Newt stood up beside Minho and motioned between himself and Thomas, "is done. It's over."

The brunet took a sharp intake of breath and held eye contact with the blond for a moment, before his gaze trailed to Minho who had folded his arms across his chest. Thomas cleared his throat and looked back at Newt, shuffling slightly closer to him.

"Newt, please. Let's talk."

Taking that as his cue to leave, Minho nodded and placed his drink on the side before he embraced Newt in a hug. His arms were strong and comforting wrapped around the smaller boy. After pulling away, Newt looked at Minho and the jock winked, giving his arm a squeeze before he excused himself and said he'd see the two of them in school.

The thudding of the door after their friend left made Newt look at the floor, then back up to Thomas. God, he wished he knew what the brunet was thinking.

"So?" Newt prompted, raising his eyebrows nervously.

He watched as his best friend swallowed, running a hand haphazardly through his dishevelled hair. Newt pursed his lips and frowned as his friend exclaimed his name (" _Newt_?!") with a mixture of what he thought was both confusion and... excitement?

"Why did you kiss him?" Thomas walked towards Newt, hands splayed out in front of him as if to grasp the blond.

Rubbing his neck, Newt racked his brain for an excuse that wasn't the truth,"Well, _he_ kissed _me_ and... uh, he was helping me practice kissing convincingly... if we have to do it again?

Thomas nodded, "Oh."

Newt really wanted to tell Thomas that Minho knew, but a part of him liked seeing the brunet all fired up and jealous, even if it was an act.

"Well, we might have to kiss again at homecoming." Thomas shrugged, rubbing his newly-shaven chin until he snapped up, remembering something. "Were you crying?"

The blond quickly rubbed his eyes and shook his head, "No, but you should leave. I'm still mad at you."

Thomas' expression changed, face falling, "Newt, I'm sorry I yelled at you. I shouldn't have. Not since you were mostly right."

The brunet took another step forward as if to go to embrace his friend in a hug, but Newt backed down. "No, just... just go, please."

Newt saw Thomas' surprise at the decline as he stepped back again, letting his arms fell to his sides in defeat. The blond took a seat on his bed and looked down at his lap, listening to the sound of the spare keys being picked up and footsteps fading down the steps. He'd used the front door - Newt knew Thomas only did that when he knew he'd done something wrong, and that left him feeling terrible for not accepting the apology.

It took all his strength to not call after the boy and run to him in forgiving.

He brought his hand up to his lips, touching his fingertips to them where Minho's lips had been a mere few minutes ago. Newt pondered the event, comparing the kiss to the ones he had shared with Thomas and Rachel.

Sure, Newt had enjoyed kissing Minho more than he had Rachel, but even though it was a deeper kiss he had just shared with the jock that made him feel warm inside, Thomas' lips on his had sent his head spinning and made butterflies flutter in his stomach. He decided that he would still take one kiss from Thomas than a thousand from anyone else.

Maybe the things he felt for Thomas had always been there, lying dormant in his subconscious. Or maybe not, he didn't know. Either way, his feelings towards his best friend and fake boyfriend had changed and there was nothing he could do.

His mother, Steve and Brenda arrived back shortly after, asking about his day over dinner around the table. By the time he went to bed at ten, Newt decided that the last thing on his mind before he fell asleep was going to be the memory of Thomas smiling at him, lips parted as they pulled away from one another and he said, "Wow."

 

* * *

 

Thomas walked home, the event he had experienced when entering Newt's room replaying in his mind. He wasn't exactly sure what he was going to find - he didn't even know if Newt was home or not - but he definitely had not expected _that_.

He had been stood there for quite a moment - before he had accidentally dropped the keys - to know that both the boys were _enjoying_ the kiss too much. But Minho? That was the main thing he didn't understand. He had never pictured the most popular guy in school to be the type to go and make out with Newt. 

Minho was bi or something like that, he wasn't entirely sure the jock had ever stated point blank, but the leader of the running team at school had never been afraid to flirt with anything or anyone at parties and in the corridors before class. So, Thomas thought, maybe he used 'kissing practice' as an excuse to go and make out with his best friend now that the blond was ' _into guys_ '.

Thomas decided to not linger on Minho as he got back to his house, but what was Newt thinking, going and kissing the guy that got them together in the first place? His mind soon trailed back to asking why the blond would kiss Minho for practice anyway. Were they really that unconvincing when embracing in public?

His cheeks burned and he retired to bed early, shrugging the whole evening off as he shrunk under the covers. It was homecoming the day after next, and Thomas didn't want to worry about anything other than that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> here's a shorter bonus chapter for you guys as an apology for being so shoddy with updating, hopefully it will tie you over until the next chapter is out - whenever that will be (soon we hope).
> 
> we also apologise for the TON of talking in this part, but it's all very important stuff so it had to be quite talky. and MAN newt is getting it on with a bunch of people just not the guy he wants agh
> 
> thank you again for continuing to read and support this fic! make sure you check out the trailer for it if you haven't already because it's wonderful: [here](https://vimeo.com/119267220) :)
> 
> tarantism


	7. seven

When Newt woke up the next morning, he wasn’t at all surprised to find that Brenda had turned his alarm off, much less that she’d scolded him for sleeping through it again. They had made a promise last night that they would look for their homecoming outfits together, as Brenda had decided that even though she was pissed at Newt for stealing her title, she didn’t want him to look like _complete and utter garbage_ – and she was shocked that he had left getting a suit to the very last minute (not that that was unusual). Though the sound of outfit searching sounded fun, he wasn’t exactly keen on going through the day alone with Brenda just yet – or the fact that they'd have to ditch school – which was why he texted Thomas.

 

**Newt: are you on your way to school yet?**

 

He decided that it would at least take a good minute before Thomas would reply, so he took off his clothes when he entered the bathroom and left his phone on the sink, just in case Thomas replied.

He forced a smile onto his face once he saw his reflection in the mirror; it was kind of hard to let out a genuine one these days. Newt wanted to believe that it had nothing to do with Thomas, but in the end, even if he wasn't _kind of_ head over heals for Thomas, he still missed his best friend.

 

**Tommy: good morning to u too, cupcake. and no im very much still in my bed textin u. y?**

 

He smiled at his phone screen (old habits die hard), rubbing it with his thumb lightly at the mental image he’d made of Thomas on his bed with his stupid messy bed hair, playing with his phone with one eye open.

The next few messages came faster, though.

 

**Newt: we're ditching school today. need to look for our outfits.**

**Tommy: oooooohhhh that sounds v rebelious. but good idea. b there in 15.**

**Newt: rebellious***

**Tommy: missed u buddy.**

 

The last message made Newt's heart flutter in his chest. It was as if Thomas could read his mind, and delve deep into his very soul.

It had always been like that with Thomas, the brunet always managed to fish the thought out of his mind or plant something there so the blond felt or did something related. Newt didn't even have to say the words and Thomas would be all over him, asking if he was all right. Hell, it wouldn't even surprise him if Thomas found out about his growing feelings toward the brunet by the end of this week.

He decided to put his phone on charge back in his room and leave it as he took a shower, thinking about homecoming night that was inching closer. In just a little over twenty-four hours it would be upon them. He knew he and Thomas would be the centre of attention there. So Brenda was probably right for saying that they needed decent outfits.

Knowing Thomas would already be in his room, he put his underwear and boxers on and wrapped the towel on his hips just a tad tighter and walked out of the bathroom. Just like he predicted, the brunet was lying on his back with three pillows propped underneath his head.

“Bro, you always take forever to shower. Did you know that?” Thomas asked rhetorically without so much as looking up from his phone.

Newt decided to screw manners and get dressed in front of Thomas. But with his back turned, of course.

“So, what's the schedule for today?” Thomas asked once the silence probably got unbearable for the brunet.

“Brenda's taking us out to look for our suits. Apparently,” Newt paused to grunt as he put on his jeans before continuing, “she doesn't want us to look like utter trash and embarrass her.”

And right on cue, Brenda stepped into his room wearing heels that were so high and sharp that Newt felt pain in his own toes. He didn’t understand how anyone could wear those shoes and be comfortable, but he let it slide. It wasn’t his problem. “That's right. And we also don't want to be late. So, let's go, losers.”

Newt scoffed at Brenda's words, but took his phone and wallet and left the house anyway. They decided that they'd take his mom's car, since Thomas didn't bring his.

“So the three of us are ditching school.” Thomas said as less of a question than a sassy comment, as he sat in the passenger seat beside Newt, who was driving.

“Duh,” Brenda popped herself down in the row behind. “we're homecoming nominees. It's like a tradition to skip school to look for outfits.”

Newt rolled his eyes at his soon to-be-stepsister, and got out of their parking lot. “Yeah, but you also forgot that we aren't exactly fond of homecoming things.”

Thomas agreed beside him, and a comfortable silence fell upon them. But there was so much more to it, Newt thought as he drove. He could still feel the barrier between him and Thomas. He really wanted to end it, apologize if he had to. Though he knew that he didn't exactly do anything wrong.

Newt was just about to touch the gear, prepared to take a turn when a hand stopped him, pulling it against Thomas' thigh. “Newt.”

He didn't answer, though his eyes shifted to his hand sandwiched in between Thomas'.

“Newt?”

Thomas tried again, and this time he did turn his face, looking at the brunet's eyes before returning his gaze back to the road. “What is it?”

Newt realized how he faked his rather sweet tone, afraid of what Brenda would think if they fought here all _uncoupley-like_.

“I'm sorry,” Thomas said. And Newt really, really hated how he could feel Thomas's eyes baring into him as he drove. “Please. I really am.”

“It's okay.” Newt understood the real meaning of Thomas' apology, and he couldn't help but scold himself for (yet again) giving into Thomas so easily. “The past is in the past.”

Thomas squeezed his hand once, and before Newt got a chance to return it, the brunet let go.

“Ugh,” Brenda whined, “You guys are so much worse than those sap couples on TV.”

Thomas sniggered, and Newt rolled his eyes. They were so much more than that.

 

* * *

 

 

Brenda jumped out of the car first (yes, _jumped_ – and in those heels) and strutted up to the store, saying how she couldn't take being alone with them for another second. Newt liked to think that she was just jealous that her relationship with Aris wasn’t as strong as theirs, but then he remembered that at least her relationship was real.

“Newt, what happened yesterday?” Thomas asked as they strolled slowly into the mall, walking about fifty feet behind Brenda.

The only thing Newt could think of doing was shrugging as if nothing had happened, hoping that Thomas would drop the subject. But as he started to take a step forward, the brunet pulled him back.

“Hey, uh, why did you kiss Minho?”

Thomas's tone was hard, almost accusing. And Newt hoped it was because of jealousy. “Because I wanted to.”

“Wanted to?” Thomas asked, confusion present. “You said it was for practice!”

“Oh, shut up, Thomas. It's not like you're not doing the same thing with Teresa!” Newt pressed. “And just like you, I wanted to do it because _Minho is a great kisser._ ” Newt mimicked Thomas' words, with the accent and all, he didn't care that he just outed himself in front of his best friend.

He could hear Thomas's realizing (“But- _Oh!_ ”) as he turned to leave, but then the brunet caught up with him. “For the record, I don't mind if you, uh, like boys or-!”

“Don't.” Newt had to cut Thomas off, watching as his best friend rubbed the back of his neck. “ _My god_ , don't even go there, Tommy.”

Newt was too humiliated to even look at Thomas, so he started to walk faster, the suit and dress shop in front of his eyes. He was sure his cheeks were flushing a deeper shade of crimson than the lipstick his almost-stepsister was wearing.

“Nice hearing you using my nickname again.” Thomas said as they fell into step walking to the store, smiling at Newt so sweetly. Those were the moments where it felt like they were dating for real. Like they weren't faking it. But now that Thomas knew that Newt _kind of sort of possibly_ liked guys, it felt like he could be himself more than the last few days. He felt more relieved than afraid.

“Welcome, welcome, muchachos!” The store employee greeted them in an instant. “My name is Jorge and I will be your assistant for your time here. What can I do for you guys?”

Thomas took a step forward, noticing Brenda was already sifting through the suits on racks. “Uh, we're looking for suits. For homecoming.”

“Ah, alright.” The man smiled at them. “Homecoming is a very big event. I’ll be make sure to find you two the perfect suits to match your lady-friends.”

Newt cringed at the unnecessary politeness, but decided to follow Jorge (who was ushering for them to do so) into the fitting room, where a large white couch that looked too comfortable to be put inside a suit store sat in the middle. More racks of suits and dresses were lined up in the corner, where it met with five empty cubicles.

“Do you guys have a picture of your date's dress?” Jorge asked, and both Thomas and Newt looked at each other.

“We're actually, uh, going _together_.” Thomas said so uncomfortably that if Newt didn't know better he would’ve laughed at Thomas' face.

“Oh.” Jorge said at first. Then something seemed to click at the old man's head, “ _Oh!_ Perfect!”

Jorge left the room, and came back with yet another rack full of suits. All of them looked so polished and well groomed that Newt felt nervous about how much they were going to cost.

Jorge handed both of them a matching pair of black suits with a white buttoned up shirt inside. They each took it and entered their own changing room.

Once the red curtain was pulled across the opening, Newt looked at the suit that he hung in front of him and decided that he didn't care about the price. He knew he had to at least try to look good in front of Thomas – who knew if looking moderately handsome could change the brunet's mind?

He tried the trousers first and they didn't exactly fit the best, but they were secured as he pulled the belt around his hips tighter. He hadn't even finished buttoning up his shirt when Thomas drew the curtain open.

“Man, look at you! Finally in decent clothing.” Thomas said with a smirk on his face, taking Newt’s suit jacket off the hangar. He held it out and Newt looked at him subtly over his shoulder before turning around slip his arms into the clothing. Thomas's hands didn't leave Newt's shoulders, and the blond realized this as he looked at their reflection in the mirror. Their bodies were touching, back to front, and it felt so right and so good that he lost himself a little. Newt thought he saw Thomas smiling at him in a way he’d never seen before, but he put it down to a trick of the light when the brunet stepped away.

Newt reluctantly turned around so Thomas could take a look. “Hm, I don’t think this is the one. Jorge, do you have any other suits you think would suit me?”

The old man nodded – “Not to worry, I have just the thing!” – and went back to the racks. Newt wished he was Jorge, so he could look at himself and Thomas from another person's perspective.

“Here,” Jorge handed each of them a different pair, this time blue for Newt and a slightly different shade of black for Thomas. “Try these. They match the best.”

Newt did as he was told; the suit looked and fitted him much better than the last one. And he felt pretty bloody good in it too. As Newt smiled and drew back the curtain, stepping out into the fitting room, the old man let out a wolf-whistle.

“Hey, pretty boy. Come see the blondie, here.”

Jorge pushed against the red curtain a little and Thomas stepped out backward from it. When Thomas turned around, his expression changed into one of awe.

“Newt, you look...” Thomas paused, walking toward him. “You look amazing.”

Newt tried his hardest not to blush, and it was weird seeing as Thomas always complimented him on lots of things. Still, he coughed and shuffled his foot on the ground, trying to sound normal as he took in what the brunet looked like all suited up. “You don't look so bad yourself.”

They stared at each other, for how long Newt couldn’t tell. But it got so unbearable that Jorge had to break the silence by saying, “Are these the suits that you want?”

Thomas was the first one to turn away. “Yeah.”

Jorge nodded, walking toward both of them before wrapping a tape measure around different parts of their bodies. “The length and fit is right on pretty boy’s, but let me just adjust the fit of your jacket blondie, so it sits nicer on your frame. Shouldn’t be longer than fifteen minutes.”

Once again the pair of them were left alone as Jorge took the blond’s suit jacket to adjust it slightly for him . Newt continued to shuffle his feet nervously as Thomas started to gather up his normal clothing. The Brit was just about to say something, when _the_ _reason that he can't have nice things_ spoke, as if out of nowhere.

“Well, isn't this nice.”

Newt didn't have to look up to know that Teresa Agnes was the owner of the voice. The girl was holding a blue dress that he saw in front of the store. How did she even know where they were?

“Oh, hey, Teresa!” He heard Thomas pipe in. “Newt, you don't mind her tagging along, right? I mean, we’re almost done.”

Newt furrowed his eyebrows and looked sternly at Thomas. He had invited _Teresa?_

Newt let out a grunt, followed by a surrendered sigh. “Yeah, no. I don't mind.”

He retired to a cubicle to change, closing the curtains behind him when he heard Teresa speak again.

“Hey, Tom?” Newt cringed at the ugly nickname (though it was very, very close to Tommy, but still), “Could you possibly help me get this on?”

Okay. That crossed the line.

Newt purposely slammed his weight onto the wall beside him and it sent a loud vibrating sound through the fitting room.

When Newt looked out through the curtain, he saw that Teresa hadn’t even bothered to actually _get into_ the cubicle, and began to get dressed in the open hall where anyone could’ve walked in. When he saw that Thomas started kissing her neck as he zipped the back of her dress up, Newt had to swallow down the jealous sick taste that had accumulated in his mouth.

He hated Teresa Agnes _so much._

Thankfully, Jorge came back with Newt’s altered jacket in his arms, and a very confused look on his face when he saw the sight. He turned to Thomas at first, then to Teresa, and finally at Newt who had stepped out from behind the fitting room curtain.

“I thought you two were together?” Jorge motioned Newt and Thomas in the thin air.

Newt turned to Thomas, folding his arms loosely as he wondered how the brunet would weasel his way out of this one.

“Well, yeah, it's complicated.” Thomas shrugged as he took the bill, and then passed it to Newt.

He could feel Jorge's concerning eyes, and Newt tried to avoid the gaze as he looked at the prices. Bloody hell, Newt thought, maybe he did care about the price of the-

“Here's a deal,” Jorge interrupted his trail of thought, “I'll give you half off the suit.” He then turned to Teresa. “But I'm afraid the dresses here are still full price.”

Newt _really_ wanted to snort at Teresa. Served her right. He saw Thomas had a brief, whispered discussion with Teresa, and eventually they all agreed to the deal.

“Perfect.” Jorge nodded. “Blondie, if you’d like to quickly try this on to see if it fits and then step out of those suits and I'll have them bagged for you.”

Newt nodded and tried on the altered piece (which fit perfectly as he told Jorge and Brenda, who had come to confirm his choice of outfit before leaving, satisfied) while Thomas took it off inside a cubicle. Teresa opened the curtain to his room, and muttered a low but very audible, “Hey, there.”

Thomas turned around and smiled, but lowered his head and cleared his throat once he realized that Newt _and_ Jorge was staring. Newt rolled his eyes at the brunet and went inside his cubicle again, wishing the day to just end already.

Once he was done, he stepped out of the room and handed the suits to Jorge who lead them out to the cashier. Newt felt somehow glad that Thomas decided to join him instead of Teresa. But when Newt was done paying after the brunet, the girl dragged Thomas out with her, leaving Newt the only customer inside.

“What is it with you two?” Jorge asked as he handed Newt's card back.

He shrugged, not knowing what to say.

“Well, whatever it was, you looked pretty...” Jorge paused, and Newt braced himself to look at the old man's posture, “pardon me for saying but, _jealous_ back there.”

“Me? Jealous?” Newt scoffed. “Nah, we're just... Complicated.” He repeated Thomas's word with a sneer that tasted almost like poison.

Jorge looked at him with sad eyes as he handed him the suits. “I hope you know I gave her a full price for a reason. She seemed like a total brat.”

Newt smiled gratefully at him. “Yeah, apparently Thomas can't see that.”

Jorge smiled at him, even gave him a piece of gum. “Have fun at homecoming, hermano.”

Newt frowned at the strange word but thanked him for all his help anyway, running to catch up with Thomas.

“Newt, what took you so long?” He couldn't believe his ears; Teresa Agnes actually had the audacity to talk to him! He held back a groan, but replied in a very-nice-but-curtly way.

“Had a lovely chat with Jorge.”

Teresa nodded and walked backwards. Newt had never wished for someone to fall over as badly as he did then. “Well, I'll see you two lovebirds at homecoming, alright?” Teresa shot a wink at Thomas.

All Newt could think was, _thank god she’s gone!_

“Man, she is so hot.” Thomas said beside him and Newt groaned. The day was not over yet. He took a seat at the free bench by the food courts and Thomas followed his action. “She is so into me, Newt.”

He had to hold the urge to roll his eyes for the umpteenth time this week; he was surprised that his eyes still functioned normally. “Good for you buddy.” Newt tapped Thomas's shoulder lightly. “Good for you.”

Then Thomas let out a triumphant breathy laugh, “I think it's, uh, time for me to become a man, you know?”

Newt's heart sank just a bit, his mind wondering through the possibility of what those words could mean. “What are you talking about?”

“Do you think I should do it with her? And by _it,_ I mean…” Thomas raised his eyebrows and bit his lip.

Newt's head was screaming with the word _‘NO!’_ a thousand times over _,_ but with Thomas having a brief idea about his sexuality now, it would seem too obvious that Newt was pinning after him if he said what he really thought. Wouldn’t it?

So instead, he shrugged.

“Oh, wow.” Thomas said breathlessly. “God, Newt. This is going to happen! Shit…”

Newt thankfully didn't have to respond as Brenda found them, three new bags in her hands. He gladly got up to help her, not able to sit beside Thomas for much longer.

“Let's go home, Brenda. I'm tired.”

Despite her want to eat lunch first, she saw something in Newt's eyes. She nodded and followed him toward the car, Thomas trailing behind both of them, totally away with the fairies.

The three of them got inside the car, and Newt turned on the radio to avoid talking with Thomas. It was weird how two weeks ago Newt would have cheered and thrown a party because his best friend was finally going to have sex with a really hot girl. But right now, all he wanted to do was to punch Thomas for being such an oblivious bastard.

Newt didn't blame Thomas for that, he couldn't. Who would have thought that Newt would like his own best friend, when said friend finally got the girl that most guys could only ever dream of? He realised how he sounded just then and sunk a little in his seat.

He sighed as he parked his car in front of Thomas' house, dropping the brunet off. “I'll call you later about tomorrow.” Thomas grinned as he took his suit bag and left the car, waving at them before he disappeared into his house.

“Is it weird,” Brenda spoke up, the car starting on its homeward journey, “that I don't really feel the love connection between you and Thomas? I mean, are you both seriously that uncomfortable that you can’t show PDA or anything?”

Newt's heart thudded in his chest. Negative thoughts (such as _oh no Brenda definitely figured it out,_ and _my god she is going to tell the whole school and mum!_ ) occurred inside him. But he was glad to know that it was only because they were not all smooch and cuddly enough. Which he was more than glad to prove wrong. “What do you mean?”

“I've never seen you two kiss aside from the sudden and unnecessary one in the hall, just after the speeches from nominees.”

Newt rolled his eyes (again?) and scoffed. “Just because you’ve never seen us kissing doesn't mean that we don’t.”

He laughed loudly when he heard Brenda said, “Oh, god. I can't believe you are forcing me to imagine you two kissing!”

 

* * *

 

 

Newt flopped down on his bed with a sigh, it had been a long day (he and Brenda had gone out for lunch afterward to kill some of the afternoon) and all he wanted to do was sleep now it was the evening. But his phone buzzed in his pockets, and he answered it in an instant.

 _“Newt, I am so sorry but I think we have the wrong suits.”_ Thomas.

Newt got up to look in the bag beside the bed, and Thomas was right. It wasn't his suit that was inside.

_“I'm on my way to yours to switch.”_

Newt grunted a ‘whatever’ back at him and waited for Thomas to arrive. Around ten minutes later he heard rumblings from the tree in front of his house, and finally Thomas came in through the ever-unlocked window.

“How did you even manage to climb up without damaging the suit?” Newt asked in disbelief as Thomas unzipped the bag to check, and there it was – Newt’s blue suit, spotless.

“A magician never reveals his tricks, now, does he?” Thomas said as he sat down on Newt's bed, putting the suit beside him.

“Still excited about tomorrow?” He added, turning his head toward the blond who was stood just in front of him. “Teresa told me we practically have it in the bag.”

“Yeah,” Newt replied, stepping from the brunet slightly. “Not as enthusiastic as you are, though.”

“Oh, come on. It's going to be fun!” Thomas whined as he pouted and stood up. “We get to eat and sing and have fun. And I get to hold hand and kiss and dance with my best friend...”

Thomas' words made Newt gulp and his back hit the wall as he had stepped too far backwards. He hoped he didn't mess up tomorrow, because just imagining them doing that stuff already made Newt feel dizzy. “Glad you still take me seriously.” Newt replied with a flat tone.

“Oh, come here, Newt. I've missed you!”

Newt didn't move into Thomas or away from him. He just let the brunet engulf him in his embrace, and Newt felt warm and safe.

Thomas groaned against him. “Ugh, come on, dude.” He said as he took Newt's arms and hooked it around his shoulders. “This totally feels one sided now.”

Newt scoffed, _as if._

They stayed like that for a good few seconds and Newt eventually held onto Thomas in a real hug.

“Hey, we gotta practice for our first dance!” Thomas suddenly added as he pulled back to look the blond in the eye, and Newt wondered how he felt so confident that they were going to win tomorrow.

“Do you even know how to dance?” Newt asked as he let Thomas put his hand on his shoulder while the brunet's own hand was on Newt's waist. The spot Thomas touched suddenly felt like it was burning.

“Nope. Which is why we're going to practice now.” Typical of them, leaving everything to the last minute.

He could only nod, because then Thomas pulled him even closer as they spun around the room, constantly stepping on each other's feet.

Newt stopped the both of them and told him to step in a box of four. Then they started over. There was no music there, but the way they moved together, so in sync and _so right_ that it sent a powerful urge for Newt to claim Thomas as his right there.

Then Thomas span Newt under his arms, earning a shocked look from Newt as they returned to their position.

Just when Newt thought they were done dancing, Thomas pulled him tight against his body and muttered, “I think we should also practice for our kiss, too.”

Newt's heart stopped.

“What?” Thomas asked, tilted his head. “That's what you've been doing with Minho, right? Don't you actually want to try it with me? To make it _convincing?_ ”

Newt didn't have the time to react when Thomas smiled at Newt, eyes flickering down to his lips. Thomas very slowly leaned in, his eyes still glued to the blond’s mouth. Newt hoped the brunet couldn't hear his heart trying to leap out of his chest. So he froze, but felt himself parting his lips in anticipation. His eyes fluttered closed, and he leant forward slightly as well, expecting to meet Thomas's lips at any second.

But they never came.

Instead, he heard Thomas' snigger that turned into laugh. “Oh, god! I couldn't do it!”

Newt quickly retraced his head and broke into an awkward laugh, rubbing the back of his neck. What was he thinking?

He felt Thomas clap his back lightly as he stepped away. “Tomorrow's going to be so _fun!_ Imagine all the stories we could tell our future kids.”

Newt had to stop and think, realizing that Thomas had meant their own _separate_ kids.

“Well, I better go and get my beauty sleep.” Thomas joked, already slinging one leg out of the window before Newt grabbed Thomas' shoulders and pulled him back inside.

“Be a normal teenage boy and go out through the bloody front door, Thomas.”

Thomas rolled his eyes, but smiled nonetheless. “Yes, _mom,_ ”he laughed before disappearing downstairs where he could hear Thomas greeting his mum politely as he left.

He watched from his window as Thomas waved at him and yelled 'See you tomorrow!' very loudly that Newt laughed.

Once the brunet was swallowed by the darkness of the street, he recalled all the things that had happened there tonight. Everything felt so right, like they belonged together. And Newt was determined to make Thomas realize that too.

He was awoken from his daydream when his soon-to-be-stepfather called him down for dinner. They said grace (something that Newt and his mother had been made to do when they’d moved in with Steve and Brenda, despite not being religious themselves), and his mother said that she had a special announcement.

“Well, what is it, mom?” Newt’s mother had insisted for Brenda to call her mom instead of Anne, her name. And Brenda gladly obliged.

“Guess what,” Anne teased, all eyes around the table on her, “the local news station wanted me to cover a story about your school homecoming tomorrow!”

At once, Newt dropped his fork and Brenda's eyes were on him. “What? Why?”

Anne frowned at Newt's behaviour, and Brenda nudged his leg under the table knowingly. “Apparently, they are allowing two boys to become kings! I mean, two boys! What happened to tradition?” Anne laughed and Steve nodded, picking up his cutlery to start eating.

“So you're going to be there tomorrow?” Newt still had a hard time believing it, because if she did do the report, he was going to be _so screwed_ when she found out that the gay nominees were her son and his best friend.

He quickly finished his meal, and went upstairs to tell Thomas everything. His text was rushed, typing so fast that he missed out spaces and added ones in that weren’t needed.

 

**Newt: mymum's going to be doin ga news report at the homecomingtomorrow. imso screwed**

 

The brunet didn't reply right away and Newt worried. He couldn't imagine his mum's reaction when she found out tomorrow.

His mother had never been the most accepting person, completely convinced that out in the world there was a perfect princess waiting for her darling son. She just didn’t see that not everyone was the textbook Disney prince or princess – maybe Newt wanted to find his own Prince Charming rather than Sleeping Beauty. But if he told his mother that, she’d make any excuse to ignore the fact he wasn’t the son she wanted. And he loved his mum, which is why he didn’t want things to change between them just yet. Not until he was certain of who he was himself.

A beep from his phone startled him and he quickly opened it.

 

**Tommy: what?! no!! thats horrible!!!!!**

**Tommy: sorry just got out of shower :/**

 

Newt tried to focus on his situation instead of imagining Thomas getting out of the shower.

 

**Newt: i know! she cant goand find out that the report shes doing is on US!**

 

Newt slipped under his blanket as he prepared to sleep, turning the lights off so that his phone was the only source of light.

 

**Tommy: don't worry. we'll figure smthn out ;)**

 

He sighed and turned around, trying to find a better position as he typed out his reply.

 

**Newt: whatever. im going to sleep. night, tommy**

**Tommy: night sweetcheeks xx**

**Newt: god no.**

 

He put his phone down, ready to sleep when his phone buzzed twice.

 

**Tommy: you love it**

**Tommy: you love ME**

 

He sighed again, this time with a small smile.

If only you knew, Tommy. _If only you knew._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> woo! a quicker update! but MAN, jealousy is really getting to newt. big hand to jorge for being a newtmas shipper too
> 
> homecoming is the next chapter and we're nearing some big stuff coming up influenced by the tv show :) ITS GETTING EXCITING
> 
> also if you'd like to get notifications once a new chapter is posted you can click on the 'Subscribe' button at the top of the page!
> 
> we hope you like this chapter and check out the [trailer right here](https://vimeo.com/119267220) or [here if you cant open vimeo](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=57A17HQs8SQ) if you haven't done so already! thank you so much for reading!
> 
> tarantism


	8. eight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter is the longest of them all. it wouldn't make sense to split it so we hope it's an okay read. here's the moment you've all been waiting for: homecoming!

Waking up the next morning, Newt felt surprisingly chipper and managed to get ready for school before Brenda had the chance to even set foot in his room, let alone yell at him like she had been doing the past few days. He gave himself a mental pat on the back, smiling at himself in the mirror just before he left his house for the day.

As per usual, Thomas and Newt met at the bus stop to catch a ride to school and chatted nonchalantly about what was happening that evening for Homecoming. Thomas insisted that they made their way there together to look the part, and the pair agreed that the brunet would pick up Newt around half-six from his house that evening to go to the event. Newt nodded a little, biting the inside of his lip as he watched the corners of Thomas’ mouth curl up in excitement.

The school day dragged on, full of people giving them various ‘good luck’s’ and praise which certainly boosted Thomas’ ego, and in turn, lifted Newt’s spirits seeing his best friend so happy and appreciated. All the time the blond had known Thomas, all the brunet had wanted was to fit in and be loved by his peers, and even though he knew inside that what they were doing was selfish, he felt happy that Thomas was finally getting that admiration.

But once the day was over, every single student in senior year was buzzing with excitement for Homecoming that evening at seven o’clock. The school dances were known for their greatness, so annually it attracted a ton of eager pupils ready to party.

When the clock struck ten-past-six that evening, Newt stood in front of the full-length mirror by the front door and ran his hands down the front of his dark blue suit. His hazel eyes looked himself up and down and he let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding after fixing his hair a little, so it didn’t stick up in odd places as usual. He looked good, or so he thought as he fixed his cufflinks and let his limbs fall to his side.

Newt tapped his foot anxiously and checked the clock in the living room as he awaited the arrival of Thomas in his rather underwhelming Homecoming transport – the Murphy’s black Toyota minivan.

A buzz in his pocket alerted the boy to his ringing phone, and as he fished it out he heard his mother squeal down the hallway.

“ _Newtie_ , don’t go anywhere without me taking a picture! I’m getting my camera!” Anne cheered, throwing her hands up as she waddled into a room in her work clothes and high heels, in search of the family camera she just _knew she left there last week._

Lips pressed together, Newt pulled his phone out of his pocket, replacing the empty space with his hand as the other answered the call. He brought the cell to his ear and greeted the caller.

“Hello?”

“Did you get my present?”

Newt frowned a little and scuffed his polished shoes along the floor a little. “Present? Uh, no, I don’t think-!”

“Of course you didn’t,” Thomas cut Newt off with slightly chuckled words. “Go and check your roof, I left something there for you earlier.”

Walking past the room his mother was still scrambling around in for a camera, Newt quickly jogged up the stairs and entered his room before heading straight for his window. The anticipation for what Thomas had left there for him grew by the second.

Opening the window and securing it up in place, Newt leant out to see that on the black tiling in the dark sat a long white box, all neatly tied up with a bow. He carefully reached out to take it, wary not to get his suit dirty before he slunk back inside and closed the frame.

“What is this?” The blond asked as he paced slowly towards his bed, taking a seat on the end of it with the phone still glued to his ear.

“Just open it.”

Setting the phone aside on speaker, Newt’s small fingers pulled at the ends of the bow so it fell away from the box elegantly. He lifted the lid and slid it underneath the actual gift box. 

“Tommy… Is this…?” Newt smiled heart-warmingly at the tie he pulled out of the box and held in front of him.

“Yeah. It’s a matching tie. I thought it was a nice final touch. Do you like it?" 

Chuckling to himself, the blond turned up the collar of his shirt and placed the tie around his neck. “It’s bloody great, Tommy.”

After a few swift movements (thrice around the tree, and under the bush just like his mother had told him) he wriggled the knot about so the tie sat nicely by his neck, and went to the bathroom to quickly observe his handy work.

Newt scooped up his phone again once he returned to his room, turning off speaker as he held the device to his ear. His grin was still wide spread across his face.

“Is your tie the same colour as my suit jacket?” The blond lay back on his covers momentarily.

“ _Maybe_ ,” Thomas’ voice sang down the line and did nothing to stop Newt’s smile.

“Well,” Newt chuckled, “we certainly will look the part.”

In that moment, he realised how badly he couldn’t wait until he was stood next to Thomas. How perfect it would be, how perfect _they_ would be – if they weren’t faking it.

“It looks really great, Tommy.” Newt confirmed down the phone as he stood to make his way back downstairs, and he could tell his best friend was smiling on the other end of the call.

The sound of music and other voices sounded down the line too, and Newt raised his eyebrows in complete confusion.

Then it clicked. “Wait, you’re already at the school? I thought you were picking me up at half-six?”

A momentary pause made Newt think he’d gone deaf until Thomas cleared his throat. “Uh, yeah. About that…”

Newt could hear the sounds of Thomas’ shoes being shuffled along the floor once he stepped onto his ground floor. He presumed he was about to tell him he’d forgot that he was meant to pick him up and that Newt would have to make his own way to the school. “What?" 

“Newt, listen,” the usual happy, playful tone of the brunet suddenly changed to one that was more serious, yet had a hint of excitement in it. “If you don’t find me when you first get here, please don’t panic.”

Frowning deeper, Newt made his way to his living room and began to pace. “What do you mean? Why? What’s going on, Tommy?”

Completely baffled, the blond stood and tapped his foot, not used to the long breaks between speaking that Thomas was taking – the brunet was the type of person to get everything on their mind out in a single breath of air, so everything they said was spoken very quickly. It unnerved Newt that his best friend was taking so long to say what he wanted.

“It’s Teresa.”

He still didn’t get it, but the word ‘ _no_ ’ came to mind straight away. “What about her?”

More silence down the line, aside from the party music and Thomas’ breathing.

“I’m going to her car, man.”

Newt subconsciously balled his fists, realising what was going on. No no _no_. 

“Tommy…”

“This is it, Newt. Tonight is the fucking night. I’ll see you after as a brand new man, reborn.”

He couldn’t find his voice. It was like someone had kicked the blond in the chest and stomach repeatedly, knocking the air out of him. He was winded. Newt’s mind was suddenly alive with countless images and thoughts revolving around Thomas and Teresa in her car in various compromising positions, the word ‘sex’ taunting him. The whole idea of the ordeal made Newt feel nauseous with burning jealousy.

The phone dropped from his ear onto the couch, the ringing of the ended call still looming in the air. Newt had to take a seat to steady himself and held his head in his hands, trying to calm himself and his racing mind down. 

 _Why did it have to be her?_ He took ragged breaths until his mother came into the room brandishing her camera. 

“I found it! Now let’s get some- what’s wrong, honey?”

Newt panicked a little as his mother approached him and took a seat beside her son. The blond swallowed and turned his head a little to look at her. “Uh, my date cancelled on me.”

“Last minute?! That’s just downright rude! And how on earth could anyone want to cancel on a handsome boy like you?” Anne wrapped an arm around Newt and he felt himself relax just a little. “Are you still going to go? You have Thomas there to keep you company, right?”

Thankfully, Newt managed to not react much to the mention of his fake boyfriend’s name, but replied sadly, “He’s… he’s currently occupied.”

“Oh, Newtie, you’ll still have fun there and besides, he won’t be occupied all night. That boy would never let you suffer alone. You’re practically joined at the hip whenever you’re together!” 

The comforting rub of his mother’s hand on his upper arm made Newt nod and smile a small smile at her. He was grateful that she knew how to get him down from a funk or upset like he just had.

“And maybe if you have the chance, you can come and dance with me at some point after my report,” she laughed and suddenly Newt went stiff again.

He chuckled nervously and the pair stood up once Steve entered the room, asking if they wanted him to take the photo. Newt tried his best to smile as the flash went off, posing for a few solo shots, and a couple alongside his mother. Newt was actually quite sad that Brenda had already left with Aris, because he would’ve really liked to have had a picture beside his almost-stepsister.

Steve pecked Anne on the cheek and clapped Newt on the back affectionately as the Isaacs departed from the house, his mother going to her reporting van whilst Newt unlocked the family car and slid in.

Not the most glamorous of ways to arrive to a Homecoming I’m nominated in, Newt thought, but he wasn’t fussed by how fancy his transport was as he pulled out of the driveway and drove towards the school. His mind was occupied with other things involving his best friend, the school’s resident sex goddess and her car in the school parking lot.

 

* * *

  

At Homecoming, the dance was starting to pick up as it neared seven o’clock. People arrived by the second in groups or couples, all dressed in their best formalwear for the occasion. Dresses of all designs and colours flowed from the women’s bodies and the men sported suits or waistcoats as they entered the huge, decorated school gym.

Thomas, however, wasn’t inside where the punch was being spiked by Gally or where the local café owner, Frypan as he was known, was serving out refreshments and singing along to the various tunes blasting through the speakers. 

No, hand pressed to the inside of Teresa’s car window, Thomas was enjoying himself without the need of the school dance. Lips pressed hard against Teresa’s, he breathed hot breaths from his nose and gladly tangled his hand in her non-styled hair. They fidgeted about until Teresa was straddling the brunet, pinned to the seat below.

They both kissed heavily and Teresa grinned against Thomas’ mouth, taking his bottom lip between her teeth. This action stifled a low moan from the boy and she shifted, whispering in a hot mess, “God, I’ve wanted this for so long.” 

The brunet freed himself from her and began trailing kisses down her neck as he panted, hands moving behind her to unzip her dress. Thomas’ kisses moved to her prominent collarbones, then slightly lower to the top of her chest before he pulled her dress down to her waist completely.

“Fuck, me too.” Thomas sighed against her skin.

Lips locked again and Teresa made swift work of unbuckling his suit pants as she laughed. This made Thomas pull away slightly, confused as to what she found so funny.

“What is it?” He asked, his breathing still ragged as she moved to kiss his neck.

“Just what you said.”

Thomas’ hands began to explore her chest less timidly, holding her over her bra. “Oh, what did you mean?”

“I’ve always wanted to have sex with a gay guy.”

Immediately, Thomas’ hands stopped wandering and dropped to his sides, Teresa’s kisses on his neck not subsiding. His face went pale, shocked at what she’d just said to him.

“What?” Thomas asked. _So, after all this time…_

She pulled back slightly so her ocean blue eyes were able to stare into Thomas’ chocolate brown ones. “What’s wrong?”

Thomas shifted below her, sitting up so she had to crawl backwards off him. He was suddenly not in the mood, any of the things he was feeling before had vanished completely at the simple statement. And he felt his predicament below becoming not so much of a problem anymore.

Clearing his throat to break the silence, Thomas began to quickly button up his shirt and buckle his belt once more, all whilst Teresa looked upon him in confusion.

“I just remembered I have to meet Newt back in the hall, so…” He snatched up his suit jacket and tie before fumbling for the handle. He opened the door and exited quickly, tying his tie rather shoddily as he walked speedily towards the gym.

As Thomas slid on the jacket and straightened his outfit out, he heard Teresa trying to catch up with him.

“Hey, Tom! Hey! Why did you stop? I thought you wanted it!”

He was so angry. How could he have been so stupid? A girl like her wanting someone like him without some sort of ulterior motive was impossible. But still, he turned around, continuing to walk towards the gym but backwards.

“I just really have to get back before they announce the winners. Oh, and your bra is showing!” Thomas called out, causing Teresa to stop and look down to fix her outfit before he turned and half-ran toward the flock of people entering the school. 

Jogging down the school halls, Thomas passed various classrooms he and Teresa had made out in and he winced. Of course Teresa only wanted him to fill her wants and desires – like having sex with a gay guy! And he wasn’t even gay!

Thomas excused himself as he wove his way through the herd of couples, bursting into the brightly coloured hall, filled with students, balloons and music.

 

* * *

 

 

Newt stood at the side of the room, lowering his cup of punch from his lips when he spotted Thomas entering the gym in a frenzy.

 Frowning at him, Newt tilted his head and pursed his lips. Where was Teresa? And why was Thomas not beaming at him, all giddy with happiness as they made eye contact. The brunet tottered towards him and stopped when he was a foot away from the tall blond.

"So," Newt forced his words out, tapping the side of his cup. He tried so hard to hide the bitterness in his tone of voice, that he asked the question through his teeth, "how was it?"

Chuckling nervously, Thomas reached past him to grab a cup from the table that wasn't the spiked punch. "I realised that I didn't want my first time to be in the back of some beat up old car..."

Newt's eyes opened wide. Thomas... hadn't gone through with it? Letting out a breath he hadn't realised he'd been holding, he nodded in not-so-subtle relief. "That's good."

Swallowing his drink, Thomas furrowed his eyebrows as he looked at him. "What do you mean?"

Continuing to tap the side of his cup, Newt racked his brain for some kind of explanation for Thomas as to why he wasn't happy for him almost popping his cherry.

"Well, uh, you wouldn't want to lose your V Card in a car - that wouldn't be a great memory for you, and talk about cliché."

Thomas scoffed, but nodded slowly in acceptance. "Yeah, you're right. I'm going to wait for the perfect moment and place."  

The cheeky tone to Thomas' voice made Newt's heart ache in his chest. Something about those words gave him hope, and he put his unfinished drink back down on the table just as the lights in the room dimmed.

The crowd 'ooo'ed and the chatter fizzled down into small whispers between friends and couples as they anticipated what was to come next. All eyes were turned to focus on the stage at the far end of the hall where the principal walked towards the microphone, hands behind his back. Principal Janson tapped the microphone a few times and the speakers rang loud, causing the students to clasp their hands over their ears for a second. 

"Looks like I got here just in time," Thomas chuckled and Newt couldn't help but smile at him.

Clearing his throat as he spoke into the microphone, Janson smiled out at all his students' faces. "Now, without me going too over the top, I wanted to welcome you to this years Homecoming and now is the moment you've all been waiting for." 

Suddenly feeling a presence beside him, Newt turned his head to see his mother holding a microphone and a cameraman beside her for the local news. His eyes stayed on her as the shorter woman sorted out her hair and muttered to herself. Nerves suddenly took over his body. This was not the way he wanted to fake come out to his mother... his mind hung on the word fake and he shook it off, playing with the cufflinks on his suit jacket. 

Newt felt someone nudge his other side and he swallowed as Thomas spoke close to his ear, "Don't be nervous, Newt."

He was sure it wasn't the cold that made him shiver.

The principal received an envelope and the whole crowd silenced instantly. To his left, Newt's mother was counted down and once signalled that she was on air, welcomed her viewers to her network. The blond nominee felt himself starting to sweat.

Janson smiled out at the school, "let's get this over with shall we? First, your Homecoming king for this year is..." The crowd stamped their feet and drummed their hands on their thighs as a makeshift drumroll. "Thomas Murphy!" 

Newt saw in the corner of his eye, his mother turning towards her son. "Newt?"

The blond didn't answer as he clapped for Thomas, who made his way towards the stage with a huge smile. The crowd erupted into magnificent applause and the brunet looked the happiest Newt had seen him in a long time.

"You didn't tell me that Thomas was... gay." Anne said antagonistically sweetly, turning away from the camera as it filmed his best friend climbing the steps to get to Janson.

Newt turned to her, suddenly all his fear dispelling as he felt the surge of courage take over him, wanting to protect his best friend. "Is that a problem, mum?"

"No, of course not, honey." She shook her head, and just when Newt thought that maybe he'd misjudged her she said, "Just maybe limit the number of times Thomas sleeps round, yeah?"

Fury boiled inside of him and he turned away, face turning red but not visible under the low lighting. If he hasn't been so angry, the nerve-wracking wait would've shook him to his core. He couldn't imagine how his mother would react to him, when what she had just said about Thomas had hurt him so much.

"Now, I think it's pretty obvious to us all who the other king is, don't you think?" Janson's voice echoed through the room over the speaker. "Your other Homecoming king is..." 

Newt held his breath and closed his eyes. _Here it comes._

"Newt Isaacs! Come on up here, Newt and everyone give a huge round of applause for your new Homecoming kings!" 

A small yelp escaped his mother's mouth and the blond turned to her, a half-smile half-sneer present on his face before he began to make his way forward through the crowd. He wasn't sure how his mother's expression was right now on live television, but he didn't turn around to find out.

People congratulated him and touched him on the back and shoulders in happiness as he neared the stairs. Newt forced a small smile onto his face, his heart beating out of his chest. The chatter and cheers made his ears ring so much that it overwhelmed him and drowned out most of the other sound.

Before he realised it, Newt was stood by Thomas' side in front of the few hundred people at the dance, a crown being placed on his fluffy blond hair. He flinched and looked up slightly, then his gaze turned to Thomas who was beaming at him as a crown was placed on his head, and the crowd gave one final chant: "Newt and Thomas!"

Strangely, Newt began to smile, and although he knew that they'd tricked them all, seeing Thomas as happy as he was once again made Newt feel happy himself. The brunet embraced him tightly in a hug and he hugged him back, arms wrapped around his upper body, near Thomas' neck.

"We did it! We won, Newt!" Thomas whispered excitedly in his ear, pulling back to look into the blond's chestnut eyes.

Newt nodded, smiling toothily. "We did it."

Thomas then, taking the thinner boy by complete surprise, leaned in and sealed his lips with Newt's. The blond's eyes widened for a second, hands moving up spontaneously to rest on the brunet's waist and then he shut his eyelids. Confetti sounded and fell all around them, but Newt didn't care.

Thomas was kissing him. Again.

The hand furthest away from the crowd moved up to Thomas' jaw, holding it there as he kissed Thomas back, pressing his mouth harder against his fake boyfriend's. It did nothing to stop his heart racing, and he felt himself beginning to feel lightheaded as his blood pumped rapidly around his body. 

Despite a few groans about how gross PDA was (probably from Brenda out of spite of them winning the title and not her), the crowd continued to applaud them. This made Newt smile into the kiss and Thomas held Newt closer to him, chests firmly against one another.

He couldn't breathe, but Thomas' kiss was like air to him, keeping him alive in that moment.

Their lips slotted together so perfectly and Thomas tasted so good, a mixture of whatever drink he had had prior and the mint toothpaste he used lingering on his tongue. The whole sensation had him feeling dizzy.

But sadly he knew the moment wouldn't last forever, and just like that the brunet pulled away, resting his forehead against Newt's. The blond peeled his eyelids open and saw Thomas do the same, eyes wide as he muttered,

"Woah."

Newt tried to catch his breath, feeling himself quiver, unable to hide the smile and blush clearly present on his face. 

"I know." 

Quieting down (they heard a few 'Woop!'s and 'Go Thomas' or 'Get it, Newt!'s before the noise died to a chatter), Principal Janson raised the microphone to his lips and cleared his throat again, a bad habit of his. "Well, that was... something. The kings will now share their first dance, so if you'd be so kind as to move to the side of the gym to create a dance-floor, it would be much appreciated." 

Taking Newt's hand in his, Thomas led the blond off the stage, down the steps and to the cleared gym floor as the music started. Newt's eyes scanned the crowd and he spotted Minho, dressed up very dapper. The boy gave him a wink and smile, but the leaner boy couldn't do anything in reply as Thomas had already taken Newt's hand to put it on his shoulder. The brunet's other hand made it to his waist.

"Just like we practiced, okay?" Newt finally found his voice and the brunet grinned, nodding as he pulled him in closer. The blond rested his head against Thomas' shoulder, nuzzling into the crook of the brunet's neck.

The music started and the pair of them began to slow dance, holding each other close as they slowly swayed and box-stepped. Newt prayed that Thomas couldn't feel his heart racing as he daydreamed. He was soon woken up from his thoughts when Thomas dipped him backwards, grinning at him goofily.

When Thomas spontaneously leant down to place a soft kiss to Newt's nose, the boy with the blond hair almost forgot that they were faking it. He smiled widely, eyes crinkling in the corners when he was pulled back up and spun under the brunet's arm. 

As he turned, he spotted his mother in the crowd, staring at him with her mouth agape and eyes watery. Anne shook her head and waved the cameraman away before departing through the crowd herself, letting the students swallow her up.

Just then the dance floor filled with all of the other couples, the song getting gradually more upbeat and funky. Newt was grateful because it took some of the pain away for the moment, after seeing his mother look so... disappointed. 

Thomas pulled Newt even closer to him - for what reason, Newt didn't know, but he didn't complain.

"Thanks for doing this with me, Newt." Thomas dropped his head to the blond's shoulder.

Newt's arms wrapped themselves around Thomas' neck, one hand in the hair at the nape of his neck. His eyes became glassy as he tried to remain composed, but his smile was obvious as he pressed his head to the side of the brunet's. 

"Don't mention it, Tommy."

"You were right about Teresa," Thomas sighed and Newt stopped holding the boy so tightly, pulling away to look in his eyes. Arms were still draped around his friend, but loose.

"What do you mean? Which part?" He asked, raising one eyebrow in confusion.

"I don't want my first time to be with someone who doesn't love me."

The sparkle in Thomas' eyes as he shrugged and rubbed his lips together made Newt nod, pulling him back in for a tight hug. His face transformed into a magnificent smile once Thomas was unable to see his expression.

"So, you're saying you want your first time to be with someone you love?"

There was an obvious hope in Newt's tone. His whole body tingled as the brunet nodded. He couldn't believe it. Could Thomas possibly love him bac-

"Which is why I'm going to make Teresa fall in love with me."

Small falling from his face as fast as an avalanche, Newt's eyes drooped. No. No no no please no.

He pulled away slightly, noticing that Thomas was looking behind him to the right, so Newt turned around to follow his best friend's gaze. His trail of sight fell upon Teresa, leaning against the gym wall as she talked to Minho.

"But tonight is all about you and me as Homecoming kings." Thomas looked back at his fake boyfriend's face, a smirk present at the corner of his mouth.

Those words meant nothing and Newt felt nothing after the brunet's last declaration, only sorrow. 

Newt wanted to pull away completely. His heart ached too much to remain standing where he was amongst the crowd of students. Everyone was smiling around him, having a great time. A minute ago he was like them, but one simple sentence had turned his night around.

"I need a drink." He muttered solemnly, untangling himself from Thomas' body.

"I think Gally spiked the punch," Thomas informed him and Newt started to make his way through the crowd.

"Perfect," Newt muttered.

A slightly uneasy chuckle came from Thomas as he walked beside the blond. "You want to go through the rest of the night drunk?"

"Yes," the blond answered quickly, "don't you?"

"I wouldn't mind remembering tonight. So i'll pass, thanks."

The little things Thomas said were what gave Newt hope, but he didn't want to bring them up too high.

Newt made his way to the punch bowl, Thomas getting lost in the people that surrounded them, shouting out congratulations. The blond was slightly glad to be alone for a moment as he swiped up a cup and the ladle, pouring himself a drink. The stench of something very strong filled his nostrils as he lifted up the cup. Yep, he thought as he wrinkled his nose, there's the alcohol Gally put in.

"So, that was a big win, right? Up there with Thomas?"

Turning his head to the side, the blond's chestnut eyes fell upon the welcomed face of Minho. Newt was so relieved at the appearance of his friend and the smile on the Asian's face made him want to grin too.

Minho's words reminded Newt that Thomas had just kissed him mere minutes ago in front of the whole school, and a rosy flush gently dashed his cheeks. Newt turned his head away slightly to conceal his complexion.

Without looking back at the boy, Newt muttered, "Yeah, it felt... good. Felt right." 

"Yeah," Minho scoffed un-mockingly, smile still very much present as he placed a hand on the small of Newt's back. "I could see that."

The blond took a swig of the drink, face contorting before he set the cup down to rub his face.

"So," the buffer boy leant back against the table, "what did he say to you when you were dancing? You were smiling like a complete idiot shank."

Laughing faintly at the weird words Minho always seemed to come out with, he took in a breath. “He just said that he wanted his first time to be with someone that he loves." 

“Dude!” Minho exclaimed, hands making huge gestures, excitement plastered over his face. “That’s good news!”

Newt shook his head, wincing. “Yeah, aside from the fact that the only person he sees himself falling in love with is Teresa, Minho.”

He sighed as he fought back the aching feeling that usually led to tears. His body felt drastically weaker with the overwhelming sadness that suddenly overcame him. He sniffed, figure falling limply as he hunched over and downed the drink.

Strong hands held the top of his arms, moving up to his shoulders and Newt looked up into Minho’s concerned eyes. The raven-haired athlete smiled sweetly, and the Homecoming king knew he was trying to lift his spirits. 

“Hey, listen to me. No crying or feeling sorry for yourself tonight. Put on a brave face and we’ll figure something out, yeah?”

Newt swallowed back a rising sob and nodded as the buffer boy muttered a “come here”, and soon the blond was pulled into a hug he very much needed.

“The pair of you practicing how to hug properly now as well?” A voice rang out over the music from behind them, and Newt felt Minho let go of him slowly to step forward and attack-hug Thomas who had reemerged after most of the congratulations had been said.

“Congrats, man!” Minho laughed as he rubbed the top of Thomas’ hair with his fist, the pair of them fooling around as Newt loosely folded his arms. Once the athlete let the brunet go, he clapped both Newt and Thomas on the back. “Told you that you would win!”

“Ow!” They groaned in synchronisation, wincing.

Thomas coughed, smiling at Minho as he and the blond turned out of their friend’s grasp. “Thanks, man. We kinda owe it to you… we wouldn’t have won or, uh, come out of the closet if it weren’t for you.”

Newt quickly glanced at Minho who was looking right back at him, like he knew what Newt was thinking. Don’t let Thomas know that you know, he repeated in his mind, trying to keep a blank expression on his face.

“Thomas,” Minho said whilst still looking at Newt and the brunet raised his eyebrows, “can I steal Newt for a dance?”

Frowning at Minho, Thomas turned his head to the blond by his side. Newt shrugged and the brunet looked back at the Asian. “Yeah, sure. Go ahead.”

A mumble of thanks escaped past Minho’s lips and he nodded towards the dance floor. Newt walked by his side amongst the dancing guests, risking a quick glance over his shoulder to see Thomas wave slightly at him.

Newt was about to move his hand up to replicate the action when he felt Minho lean close and whisper, “Newt, look, I talked to Teresa earlier.”

Can everyone please stop talking about Teresa for one bloody minute? Newt thought, but curiosity got the best of him as they settled on a spot on the dance floor. 

“Talked to her about what?

Minho took Newt’s hand in his and started to dance with the slimmer boy. He moved in close to the blond and Newt swallowed. The athlete had his head against the side of his own so he could talk quietly without anyone else hearing.

“About what the fuck she’s doing.”

“And what did she say?” the Homecoming king frowned. Thomas hadn’t really told him anything about what had happened, and he wanted a good explanation.

Leading the dance in time to the music, Minho turned around with Newt and the blond spotted his best friend watching them not so subtly as he sipped his drink.

“She said she’s not stepping down from him because she – and I quote – ‘likes how he makes her feel.’”

Newt scrunched up his nose in disgust, the hand on Minho’s back moving up to rest near where his head was placed just above his broad frame.

“What a great coincidence now that Thomas wants to swoon her.” His head flopped onto Minho’s shoulder and he added quietly, “I won’t stand a chance.”

“Hey, hey now,” The blond felt Minho rest his head lightly against his own, “don’t be such a downer. There’s always a chance.”

“I don’t see one.”

There was a pause for a while and the music ended, prompting Newt to pull back. But before he could do it of his own accord, his friend gripped his shoulders tight and held him at arms length. The look of excitement on his face was even more vibrant than it had been previously, and it scared Newt a little. 

“I’ve just had an amazing idea! If Teresa isn’t backing down, the way you can have your chance with him is by having a threesome with them!”

Jerking his head back in shock, Newt almost choked on his tongue. A _threesome?!_

“Wh-what the- No! Absolutely not!”

“I know it’s a huge thing and that having sex with Teresa might make you feel…” Minho shrugged to convey his point without words, “but it’s the best way!”

“Not if I was the last person on Earth and it was the only option to repopulate the planet!” Newt stated.

Minho rubbed the back of his neck and sighed, showing off his (very attractive, Newt realised) biceps. The boy was only trying to help him, but his plan was ridiculous. “Just consider it?”

“I don’t know. It’s just a lot to take in.” 

Another thought now captivated his mind. Noticing Minho’s arms made Newt ask himself when he had even started liking boys on a whole now? The blond realised he wasn’t so much against girls – they were pretty and had great hair and their laughs filled him with such joy, he would say he was still moderately attracted to them – he was just against Teresa. Thomas must’ve been the trigger; he bit the inside of his cheek.

When the music came back on after its brief interval, Newt shuffled on the spot and suddenly felt extremely out of place. He reached up and took the plastic crown off his head that had been there no longer than half an hour. The blond stared down at it, turning it in his hands.

“I’m just going to go home,” he concluded, walking backwards for a few paces before he turned and started to make his way out of the bustling gym. 

Spotting Thomas, who looked at him in confusion at the sight of his crownless head, Newt turned his vision away and sped up until he was out of the stuffy room. He was exhausted already and walked down the corridor until he found an exit and made it out into the night. 

“Hey, Newt – hey, wait up!” His name was called behind him, and Newt knew it was Thomas sprinting after him. It took all his strength to not just speed up so the brunet couldn’t quite catch up to him. “Where are you going?

“Home.” He replied curtly.

Taking heavy breaths, Thomas jogged in front of the blond, holding out his hands to stop him in his tracks. Once Newt had ceased his movement, the brunet placed his hands on his knees as he leant over to take in a few gulps of air.

“Newt, Homecoming has barely even started,” Thomas stood back up and looked sadly at Newt and the crown in his hand.

“We can stop pretending now, Tommy. You got what you wanted – you won Homecoming king and you’ve got Teresa practically all over you.”

The brunet frowned, confused – but his eyes radiated sadness. “Why are you being like this? Did I do something wrong?”

Newt wanted to scream yes, yes, _yes_ you did you… _shucking_ idiot! But he wouldn’t do that, not to Tommy. So he shrugged instead, “go back to your party, Thomas.”

With that he began to stride away from his best friend once more. He had felt this same emotion before, and the more he thought about it, it seemed all too similar to what he had felt at Minho’s party. He was lost.

“No, here,” Thomas refused to give up, walking alongside Newt as they headed deeper into the parking lot and towards Newt’s car, “let me drive you back.” 

The sudden loyalty to him made Newt’s skin prickle. He wished his emotions would sort themselves out, and that Thomas would stop being so unpredictable. It didn’t help him stop falling for him when he just decided to drop everything for Newt.

“Thanks,” he muttered.

Chuckling, Thomas opened the door for the blond. “Don’t mention it.”

 

* * *

 

 

It surprised Newt that Thomas – who was so consumed with the idea of popularity – had not only driven him back to his house, singing along to old songs on the radio as the journey went on, but also stepped out of the car to lock it. He didn’t appear to be in any hurry to get back to the party that had just secured his way into the limelight.

Even so, Newt licked his lips and paced slowly up to his porch, and decided to check just in case he was wrong.

“Are you going back to the dance?”

With a short pause followed a shrug from the brunet. “Maybe. But right now I want to climb up to your roof." 

Newt rolled his eyes and folded his arms over his chest. Before he could get a word in edgeways, Thomas had thrown himself at the huge tree looming over his tiled roof and began climbing it like a less-amazing Spider-Man. The blond shook his head and climbed the steps of his porch to go and unlock the door, opening it to find his mother crying on the stairs.

After the loud thump upstairs – obviously coming from Thomas managing to do something clumsy – had subsided, Newt swallowed and approached his mother slowly.

“Mum? Are you okay?” He asked, concern apparent in his voice. 

Anne wiped her eyes with the crumpled tissues balled up in her hands, and then took a long breath before she blew her nose. “How could you do that to me? Embarrass me on television…”

Sighing, Newt flopped down on the step beside her, tilting his head to the side. “I’m sorry, mum. I should’ve told you sooner that I was…”

He should have, Newt thought, but he was confused and too scared of what his mother or soon to be stepdad would say. And this reaction was exactly what he hadn’t wanted. 

“No,” Anne sniffed loudly, “it’s okay. It’s just one of those high school phases that comes and goes, just like mine back in the day…”

A phase? Newt subconsciously let his mouth fall slightly open. He didn’t think it was a phase, but then again he hadn’t ever seen himself falling for his best friend either. He pondered whether to tell her about the whole ordeal or not; maybe that way he could understand more.

“But what you did on that stage with Thomas…” Newt’s mother said, looking at him sternly now with eyes red from crying, “What you did was – there isn’t a word for it. Newtie, sweetie, I want you to think long and hard about the choices you’re making and just know that somewhere out there is the _perfect_ girl for you.”

Newt brought up images of Rachel. She was funny, nice and pretty in her own delicate way. Then he thought about Sonya. Again, she was pretty like all of the popular girls were, though slightly annoying. And he realised that neither the redhead nor Rachel were, well, Thomas. Not a single one of them could make him feel as happy as he was when he had Thomas by his side. They weren’t _his Tommy._

“You’re wrong,” Newt muttered quietly, just audible enough for his mother to hear and furrow her eyebrows at. “There’s nothing wrong with me, it’s you.”

The blond stood up and immediately darted upstairs for his room, feeling like he wanted to cry the entire time. This was exactly what he had been dreading. As he entered his room, he closed the door with his back and covered his mouth with his hand. The action helped slow his choked dry sobs a little, remembering that Thomas was waiting for him outside on the roof.

Opening the window, Newt chucked his crown onto the bed, carefully crawled out of the room and made his way to sit down beside Thomas. He nervously let his legs dangle over the edge and even though the drop wasn’t that high, Newt had never been a fan of heights.

A thick smog of what smelt like mint and tobacco filled the air as Newt turned to the side just when Thomas let out the puff of cigarette he’d just taken in. He was sure Thomas was smoking because he had heard most of what had just gone on downstairs.

Snatching the cigarette from Thomas’ hand, the blond took a long drag of it (his first smoke in a good few months since he’d told himself he’d quit), letting the nicotine calm him from inside out. He felt as if he could breathe again – as ironic as that was.

“Newt? Hey, uh, what happened down there?” Thomas hesitantly asked, noticing how on edge his best friend was.

“My mum thinks that we’re actually a couple and she didn’t react,” he winced, “ _well_ to it.”

“Tell her we’re not, then.” The brunet said carelessly as Newt rolled the cigarette around between his fingers, and the blond’s heart sunk at the thought of ending his fake relationship with Thomas.

“Tommy, do you want-?”

“Was I a better kisser than Minho?” Thomas queried suddenly, interrupting Newt mid-sentence. 

Newt was so taken aback by the question, not sure whether he was being taunted or teased or not, that he almost fell off the roof. He placed a steady hand down to hold himself in place securely.

“I… uh…” 

“Don’t make me kiss you again to make up your mind.” Definitely teasing, Newt confirmed to his disappointment, and he was clearly joking about kissing him then and there.

Rubbing the back of his neck to try and rid himself of the hot prickly feeling there, Newt nodded, “Yeah… you were a much better kisser than Minho.”

It was the truth.

Thomas smirked, the corner of his mouth playing host to a dimple there and Newt couldn’t take his eyes off it.

“I knew it,” Thomas laughed, snatching the cigarette back from Newt to hold it between his teeth, “experience isn’t everything after all.”

The blond rolled his eyes, but once the motion had come to an end he swallowed hard at the sight of Thomas. The brunet held the cigarette between his index finger and thumb, his cheeks hollowed out as he took a drag of the roll-up before tilting his head back. Neck exposed and features facing skywards, Thomas blew the thick smoke out from between his pursed lips, the smog escaping and dancing in the cold air around them. Newt wanted nothing more in that moment than to sit himself on Thomas’ lap and suck in the smoke that the brunet blew out, right as it left the boy’s lips.

Thomas lay back on the roof, feet dangling freely off the edge and soon Newt followed suit, head resting on the cold slate tiling. They lay there for a while just staring up at the dark sky, the first few pinpricks of light were dotted overhead as stars appeared.

“What you said before, when I walked in on you and Minho… do you still want to end this thing since Homecoming is over?”

Newt turned his head toward his best friend, holding eye contact for a moment before he shrugged. His mind went back to the first time they had talked about faking their relationship. It felt like a lifetime ago, so much so that he almost didn’t remember the time when they were just plain best friends.

“It’s your call, Tommy.”

Puffing out another breath of smoke, Thomas chewed on his lip. “It would seem kinda sudden to just end this after winning… Maybe we can carry this on for a while longer, just until it burns out.”

The brunet raised his eyebrows a little as if asking Newt’s opinion on what he’d just said. Newt’s heart swelled in his chest at the thought of being able to hold onto their fake love a while longer. 

“Burns out?” The blond furrowed his eyebrows, “What do you mean?”

A thought suddenly popped into Newt’s head, about how Thomas would be Teresa’s in his entirety if this ended. And he couldn’t have that.

“We can tell everyone at a later time that it was just complicated, but we’re fine being friends.” Thomas tapped the cigarette a little.

“And then everything will go back to being-?”

“Normal, yeah.” The brunet finished Newt’s sentence, and in turn the blond felt as if a huge void had opened up in his chest.

Praying Thomas wouldn’t hear, Newt muttered lowly, “I don’t want it to, though…”

But he heard, and the brunet tilted his head slightly. “What?”

Newt swallowed as his face burned a deep shade of red. To try and distract his friend from what he’d said, he reached for Thomas’ cigarette but the boy pulled it away.

“What do you mean you don’t want to?”  Thomas sat up and stared down at his best friend in confusion. 

“Nothing, Tommy. It just came out wrong.” Following the brunet’s actions, Newt then sat up and sighed, “Now give me the cigarette.” 

Thomas licked his lips and shrugged off the comment, handing the roll-up over. The leaner boy of the two put the cigarette in his mouth, wishing for it to help keep his mouth shut and stop him from blurting out something even worse that he couldn’t wriggle out of.

Softly, the brunet said, “I’m so grateful for everything you’ve had to put up with these past few weeks.” 

Newt saw that his friend was looking at him with such thankful eyes, the stare making his nerves boil up inside. 

“I mean, that’s what a best friend does, right?”

“Yeah,” Thomas smirked (with that stupid, fucking dimple he wanted to kiss so badly), chuckling a little as he ran a hand through his hair. Newt tried his best not to grit his teeth and blew out the last drag of smoke from the cigarette, blunting it on the roof.

“Thanks, Newt.”

The blond found it hard to swallow, but looked down at his lap and nodded slowly. Before he realised what was happening, Newt tensed up as Thomas leaned over and placed a soft yet quick kiss to his cheek. 

“That’s not even weird anymore,” Thomas admitted, his voice almost melodic, so much so it could’ve lulled Newt into an euphoric sleep.

But his whole body was screaming ‘ _are you fucking serious?_ ’ despite the words that escaped from between his lips in an easy chuckle. “Yeah, I guess not.”

Thomas stretched his arms up and yawned, shirt riding up slightly and Newt couldn’t believe how badly the world was against him this evening. He looked down at his hands on his lap, rather than the happy trail he’d caught a glimpse of for a mere second. 

“I don’t feel like going back to the party,” the brunet said, shocking Newt a little at his out of character reluctance. But he smiled nonetheless.

“Don’t then. Let’s just play inside.”

Raising his eyebrow in what Newt thought was a suggestive way – but wasn’t – Thomas laughed, “ _Play?_ Dude, are you twelve?”

“Xbox, Tommy. Let’s play Xbox.” The blond corrected him and shuffled backwards away from the edge. Once he was a comfortably safe distance from falling, Newt stood and offered a hand for his still-fake boyfriend to take.

Accepting the offer, Thomas smiled and grasped his hand firmly, allowing Newt to help pull him up so their faces ended up very close. With a smirk, the brunet stepped away and slipped through the window, into Newt’s empty room.

Newt wanted nothing more to push Thomas for being such a teasing, not-knowing asshole. But he couldn’t. He would never do that to him.

“Wait up, Tommy.” 

The pair of them played on the Xbox for about an hour and a half before they fell asleep on the bed among a mess of blankets, not even managing to make it out of anything other than their suit jackets. They hadn’t finished their game when they’d collapsed, crowns resting by the pillows as their limbs unwittingly and unknowingly tangled together in their sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if you're reading this, congratulations for surviving that cluster-fuck. it's quite an eventful chapter but we have a bunch more coming up that are huge things like this so we hope you stick around for those :-)
> 
> the threesome is a plot point from the actual show so you know we didn't add that for no reason ha
> 
> thank you all again from the bottom of our hearts for supporting stta and for reading, relaying and reviewing it.
> 
> tarantism


	9. nine

With a smack of his lips and a groan at the taste of his breath, Newt slowly opened his eyes as he woke up to find his chest particularly heavy that morning. As he raised a hand to rub the sleep and hair from his eyes, he peered down through his bedhead at the limb that was draped across his torso. His vision slowly adjusted and became clear.

Thomas.

Newt lifted his head to observe their current situation, noticing that not only was the brunet curled into his side with his arm across him, but their legs were tangled too.

They were still in their homecoming suits, albeit they were wrinkled and hanging loosely from their bodies. They would be quite a scene to anyone that happened to walk in on them, the blond thought, chuckling to himself groggily.

The blond looked at Thomas who was snoring peacefully, head lolled to the side and mouth open. He looked so beautiful, Newt thought, and no painter could portray someone as perfect whilst they slept as Thomas looked.

And without thinking, Newt leant over and placed the faintest of kisses to his best friend’s exposed neck.

Thomas stirred slightly and the blond pulled back immediately. His heart was beating out of his chest as he registered what he had just done. Thomas’ neck was so warm against his touch, inviting him in and he lay back down, shifting closer to the brunet.

He screwed his eyes shut, resisting all temptation to wrap himself around Thomas and just lay there until the boy showed signs of waking. But he tucked in close to his side, finding warmth from the simple brushing of their limbs. Newt ran a finger slowly over the back of Thomas’ hand on his stomach and sighed as he fell asleep again soundly.

The pair of them managed another half an hour’s sleep until Thomas stirred and unravelled himself from their knotted limbs, leaving Newt to slowly reawaken alone on the mattress as Thomas sat up and yawned. To Newt’s relief, only he remembered that he had kissed his best friend’s neck when he woke up, not the brunet.

He was thankful that once they were up and dressed out of their suits into something more comfortable (Thomas had a stash of clothes he had left at Newt’s over the years so he changed into some of those), they spent the rest of the weekend together. Newt couldn’t have been more grateful to have Thomas by his side like before, as if nothing had really changed between them. Their bond had grown stronger, in fact.

Mid-afternoon on the Sunday, Newt made sure to clear his search history when Thomas asked to use his laptop to browse the web. Nothing would have been worse than the brunet seeing his recent Google searches for things like “how to tell if you’re falling in love with your best friend”. That was not how we wanted his soulmate to find out.

 

* * *

 

Come Monday morning, Newt drove to Thomas’ house for a change to pick him up for school, Brenda voluntarily tagging along to the blond’s surprise. Her presence made him think about the promise he’d made to himself in terms of trying to build a better relationship with his almost stepsister. He planned to keep that promise; Brenda wasn’t completely horrendous after all… mostly.

Parking up at in the school’s parking lot, the three of them scurried out and Brenda sauntered off to her pack of friends, leaving the best friend duo alone to walk up to the school.

“Well, that was a sight I never thought I’d see in all the years I plan to know you,” Thomas chirped to Newt’s left, holding onto the straps of his backpack. “You and Brenda, I mean – getting along.”

Shrugging, Newt thanked the brunet, as the door was held open for him and he explained; “I’m trying to turn over a new leaf – what’s the point of fighting with her in the end?”

“That’s very deep, Newt.” Thomas scoffed, a small laugh escaping his throat.

With a shove to his friend’s arm and a roll of his eyes, Newt approached his locker and started on the combination number. “Whatever, Tommy.”

The brunet leant against a few closed lockers to the side of Newt’s and waited as the blond pulled out the books he needed for class, stuffing them into his bag. But when Newt turned to look at Thomas occasionally, he could see his mind was somewhere it hadn’t been over the weekend – he looked like he was in a distant, far away world of his own.

“Tommy, you alright?” He asked, closing his locker before leaning closer to put a hand on the boy’s shoulder. He gave the spot a gentle rub.

Thomas turned to Newt and a smile instantly spread across his face as if the world was all right again. “Yeah, I’m okay.”

“You can talk to me if you’re not, ya know?”

“Yeah, It’s just…” Thomas trailed off, chestnut eyes looking around at all the people passing through the crowded halls. He quietly leant in to Newt, “I miss Teresa.”

“Oh.” His hand fell from the brunet’s shoulder a few seconds after the declaration and Newt closed his eyes a little, his own frame falling slightly.

Rubbing his lips together as he prepared for what he was about to say, Newt took a deep breath. “Go talk to her… it’s the only thing you can do.”

Thomas nodded, his mind once again miles away. “That’s if I can find her, though.”

“What really happened at homecoming, Tommy? You never told me…”

Newt watched as his best friend rubbed the back of his beck in a flustered manner, chuckling uneasily. “I did tell you, Newt – my first time was not going to happen in the back of that car.”

The blond could tell that he was lying from the Tell above his eye he’d noticed was there when they were ten, but he wasn’t going to pry. He could see how uncomfortable it was making Thomas, and he didn’t want to push him.

“Tell me when you’re ready, it’s okay.” Newt smiled as he nodded and started towards his chemistry class. When he was halfway down the hall, he turned back to see Thomas still frozen on the spot, eyes glassed over and empty. The blond’s mind raced with questions, but the most profound was _what was wrong with Thomas?_

 

* * *

 

Another week went flying past and by the time it reached Monday again, Newt was sick and tired of the funk Thomas had got himself in over Teresa; getting himself detentions for not paying attention in class, forgetting they _had_ class and just being a general pouting annoyance.

Newt had tried being sympathetic to his best friend’s situation, but when he rethought the whole week, he didn’t know why. He didn’t want Thomas with her: stuck-up, selfish… _busty, beautiful Teresa_. But he did want his best friend of ten years to be happy. He was in a sticky situation – sacrifice his own happiness like he normally did, or put himself first for once.

Deciding to speak up about recent events, Newt cornered Thomas as they were about to enter the cafeteria, dragging the sulking boy towards the food line so they could talk.

“Okay, Tommy. I am so sick of seeing you like this.”

Thomas raised an eyebrow half-heartedly at Newt’s frowning face, using as little muscles as possible.

“You need to talk to her or move on because moping isn’t helping anything.” Newt added as they grabbed a tray from the side and slid it along the metal of the counter.

Slumping his shoulders, Thomas sighed, “I would love that, if she would just stop ignoring every text I send.”

They reached the front of the queue and fished out the correct money from their wallets as the dinner lady served them two bowls of spaghetti Bolognese, the day’s special.

“Instead of texting, speak to her in person.” Newt added finally before they picked their trays up.

Newt turned around and stepped out of the queue, shortly followed by Thomas. But as the brunet took a step forward, someone bumped into him accidentally and sent everything on his tray down the front of his clothes. Newt opened his eyes wide and looked at the person that had knocked into his best friend.

It was Teresa.

“Holy shit, I’m so-!” The girl looked up into the face of whom she had just bumped into and her expression changed from worry to a sneer. “Oh, it’s just you. Good thing I dumped food on someone that dumped me.”

With a dramatic flick of her hair over her shoulder, Teresa faltered for a second before sauntering away in her blue body-con dress.

Newt couldn’t believe how ridiculous she had just sounded and turned his attention back to Thomas, who had lost his tray to the cleaners as he stood there. His hands were held out to the side as spaghetti and sauce fell off his shirt in chunks.

The blond shook his head in disbelief at what had happened and stepped forward to hide Thomas from the humiliation of having food knocked down you. People were muttering and laughing all around, and the lunch queue sniggered to themselves. Newt grabbed a few tissues from the dispenser on the side and dabbed at huge blotches of tomato sauce.

“Tommy, I have my gym clothes in my locker, I’ll go get my top. Wait right here.” Newt smiled at Thomas who had flushed a faint red, but he nodded and the blond darted off to get his clothing, dropping his own food on an empty table nearby.

Thomas never remembered to bring his gym clothes to school unless there was a track team meet, so Newt knew that it was no use in offering to retrieve Thomas’ own gym clothes. They weren’t the same size – Newt was a lot thinner than Thomas, despite them being roughly the same height – but it was better than wearing a stained top all day at least.

Newt reached his locker in no time and pulled the clothing out of his gym bag before hurrying back to the cafeteria, half-running half-jogging. But once he entered the room and returned to the spot he had told his best friend to wait in, Thomas was missing. He scanned the bustling room a few times in case he had overlooked him, but he swore under his breath as Thomas was nowhere to be seen.

Bunching the shirt up in his hands a little, the blond looked down at the floor to see a few bits of pasta in a sort of trail heading towards the door. He figured that if it lead to anywhere, it would probably be to his stupid, idiotic, unpredictable fake boyfriend.

Newt ignored a few side comments thrown at him about Thomas’ accident and jogged out of the canteen, spotting the occasional dot of sauce down the long stretch of corridor he was in. He followed the signs until they seemingly ran out and he was standing in the middle of the empty school hall, looking around and thinking about where Thomas might have gone.

Spotting an empty classroom with its door open a fraction, Newt slowly approached it to be greeted with muffled sounds of talking inside. As he neared it, the blond could definitely make out Thomas’ voice talking.

“Teresa, listen-!”

“No, Tom. You left the car to go back to your boyfriend after you freaked the fuck out. I’m sorry if our little ‘fling’ wasn’t good enough for you, but you can’t have us both.”

Without much forethought, Newt walked into the room and threw the shirt in his hands in Thomas’ direction, folding his arms. “Here’s your shirt, Tommy.”

Thomas caught it despite the obvious shock at Newt’s sudden arrival. He blinked his apologetic doe eyes and Newt felt his insides knot. God, he thought, stop _doing_ that.

“Newt, I’m sorry for leaving – I just… I had to talk to Teresa and I thought this was the only opportunity.”

Teresa and Newt made eye contact, both gazes moderately stern, but they didn’t hold It for long as Thomas grabbed the hem of his stained shirt and tugged it up over his torso and head.

Newt swallowed and looked away at the floor for a second before his eyes trailed back to Thomas’ bare chest. He absentmindedly bit his lip as the brunet un-scrunched the gym top to pull back over his head. He caught sight of Teresa staring too, with a similar expression to his on her face.

Once Thomas had slipped on Newt’s shirt the blond noticed that it was ( _unfortunately_ ) a little too tight, but fit all the same like he’d thought it would. Newt shook himself from his thoughts and looked up at Thomas’ face that was moving between looking at Newt and looking at Teresa.

“What?” The brunet frowned, catching the two staring at him.

“Nothing.” Both Newt and Teresa mumbled in sync.

Thomas swallowed and turned fully to Teresa, “Please, just let me explain what really happened and why.”

“Fine,” she tilted her head to the side so her luscious long hair fell over her shoulders.

Newt took a breath and then sighed, sitting himself on one of the tables.

Opening his mouth to speak, Thomas hesitated and looked back at Newt. The blond could see in his eyes that he wanted to tell Teresa the truth so badly, but he knew he couldn’t just out them as fakes; Teresa would probably hate him even more. Newt looked down at his hands in his lap and twiddled his thumbs, hoping that Thomas did the right thing whatever that may be.

“I realised that what we were doing was a mistake… Look, I love Newt, but I’m also quite fond of whatever this is,” Thomas gestured between him and the school’s resident sex goddess, “So I was torn. And I panicked.”

Newt’s heart stopped for a second. He knew what Thomas was saying about him was an act, but he couldn’t stop his body reacting as it did.

A heavy silence fell in the air and Teresa raised her eyebrows, tapping her foot quickly to the same pace as Newt’s heart as it restarted.

“I… uh… I was thinking…” Thomas rubbed the back of his neck and from where the blond was he could see it turning a shade of rouge.

“Yes?”

Another moment of silence passed and Newt didn’t realise that Thomas was about to speak again before the blond blurted out without thinking, “we could have a threesome.”

Both heads turned to Newt, who sat mortified with eyes wide open. “What?”

“A… uh…” He felt his face heat up as he stuttered. Why had Minho ever put that stupid idea in his head so it could infect his mind and grow to what it was?

“A threesome?” Teresa repeated, making the last word hang on her tongue as if she was considering it then and there.

Newt felt Thomas’ glare bearing into him but even so he replied coyly, “y-yes?”

Just then the bell rang, relief washing over Newt as Teresa slung her bag high onto her shoulder and began to walk past them toward the door. She was just about to exit when she spun around and smirked, “text me the details.”

Then she was gone and Thomas was on Newt immediately, holding his shoulders firmly but not enough to hurt his friend.

“What were you thinking?” Thomas hissed, “Oh, right – you weren’t! You couldn’t let me sort this out myself? I appreciate you wanting to help me, but _space_ , man!”

“I don’t know why I said it, but she’s talking to you again, right? Don’t act like you weren’t completely stuck on what to say! You were going to spill everything to her and don’t for one second think that she wouldn’t tell the whole school – and then we’d be right back to where we were before: bottom of the social ladder!” Newt had never spoken so sternly to Thomas and it pained him to do so, but he hoped to get his side across. This was Thomas’ stupid idea after all – he hadn’t planned to fall for him -- for _Christ sake!_

“Did you seriously suggest a fucking threesome?!” Thomas rubbed his face, voice and expression a mixture of confusion and what was the nearest to anger he could manage without sounding too mean.

“Hey, I fixed the problem…” _Kind of_ , Newt added onto the end in his head. They just had to figure out how on earth they were going to get around the whole suggestion.

Thomas shook his head in disbelief and flopped onto a chair behind Newt. They still had a few good minutes before they would have to leave the classroom.

“Why would you do that? You do realise that ‘threesome’ means three people together all having sex at once – _together_. Right?”

“Hey, don’t get angry with me – this was your problem in the first place not mine,” Newt tried to hide the sadness in his voice as he watched Thomas run a hand through his hair, messing it up the way Newt loved best.

“Maybe… I don’t know, maybe we can make this work…”

Newt stood to leave but stopped, doing a double take before turning back to Thomas in his seat. “W-wait, _what?_ ”

“We could make this work…” Thomas sat forward, tapping a finger on his knee as he did the squinty thinking face Newt had memorised and grown so familiar to.

“You and I could show up and so could Teresa. We could kiss a little, you and me,” Newt blushed hard at Thomas’ plan, placing a hand over his mouth to hide it as much as possible, “and then you could make up an excuse and leave so me and Teresa could be alone.”

Oh… of course. Nothing good could ever happen to him, Newt thought.

Students began filing into the classroom, so Newt and Thomas jumped into action and scurried out past them into the corridor, heading toward their next lessons.

“I’ll swing by yours later to discuss a proper plan, yeah?” Thomas prompted, bidding him farewell with a clap to Newt’s back before he disappeared into the crowd to get to his separate lesson.

Newt continued to walk in a trance. He blinked; mind trying to process what was happening. Bloody hell, he cursed silently, he was so dead. Worse than dead. Completely and utterly fucked.

He moved as quickly as he could through the herd of students crowding the corridor, hurrying to his class. His eyes scanned the room in hope that the person he needed to speak to was there. He spotted Minho and let out a sigh of relief.

“Minho!”

The boy jumped at the sudden exclamation of his name, pulling him out of the conversation he was having with his group of friends as the blond approached him.

“Hey, bud. Where’s the fire?” He chuckled, eyebrow raised.

Newt pulled his muscled arm so Minho followed him to the mostly empty corner of the room. He swallowed and shuffled on the spot for a while before he looked up at Minho.

“I just blurted out ‘we can have a threesome’ to Teresa and Thomas.”

Minho’s jaw dropped and he looked around at the unaware students behind them before leaning in closer to his friend. “What?”

The lankier of the two made a panicked gesture with his hands and the athlete puffed out his cheeks in disbelief. “I thought you said you weren’t going to-?”

“I know what I said!” Newt’s voice went strangely high pitched and he cleared his throat, “and Thomas said that we could go through with it – only that he has a plan to get me to leave.”

“What? No! You can’t leave!” Minho protested. “Dude, you can’t let Teresa win over you!”

Newt sunk down into the seat at the back of the class wearing a face of total defeat, and Minho slid into the desk beside him so he could continue the rest of their conversation, despite the looks his usual friends were giving him.

“What else can I do? He only wants _Teresa_ , and only agreed to the whole ordeal because of the fact that they may actually have sex somewhere more comfortable and romantic than her car!” Newt laughed sadly in a state of panic.

“I have a counter-plan. I’m coming to your house tonight, so make sure Thomas is there.” Minho nodded at Newt as the Teacher began to bring around the papers they were working on that lesson.

“Wait, what are you planning, Minho?” Newt furrowed his eyebrows and leant closer to Minho, until the Teacher scolded Newt verbally and told him to focus on his work so the blond never got a reply from his friend.

 

* * *

 

The day droned on for what seemed like days, when in reality it was only a few hours. When Newt finally got home he chucked his bag to the side, kicked off his shoes and retreated to his room as usual. But this time, Minho was with him, making sure to take his shoes off before climbing the stairs and entering the boy’s room expectedly. Newt fished out his cell to call Thomas.

The phone rang twice before it was picked up.

“Tommy?”

“I’m just on my way over now, class overran, the bastard.”

“Minho’s here.”

“What? Why?”

Newt glanced to his side as Minho looked at various childhood pictures on his dresser. “Just come quick.”

Before the pair hung up, Thomas had uttered a small “okay” and Newt turned to Minho once the line went dead.

“Tell me what you’re up to.”

With a smirk that made the blond groan, Minho chuckled, “Just wait until Thomas gets his perky ass here.”

It was only around five minutes before the brunet arrived at the Isaac household. Newt guided him up to his room, despite the other boy being there most days. However he was happy that Thomas had decided to knock on the front door rather than his window. It made a nice change.

Once they had made it into Newt’s room, Thomas flopped onto the bed beside Minho who was sat waiting for them to reappear.

“So, what’s up guys?”

The blond took a seat himself and watched as Minho stared at Thomas, lips pursed and a cute little crinkle visible between his eyebrows. “Did you agree to the threesome with Teresa?”

“How did you-?” The brunet turned his attention to Newt, realising that of course his best friend would have told his new Confidant. “Oh, well, yeah actually. Why?”

“Do you know _how_ to have a threesome? Most guys think they do, but when they get down to the messy part, they realise how inexperienced and unknowledgeable they actually are.” Minho raised an eyebrow and Thomas opened his mouth to respond, but shook his head.

The Asian chuckled, “then it’s both of your lucky day because I’ve had more experience in this area than you have in your pinkie fingers.”

Newt frowned a little, unsure why he was surprised that Minho had experience in this kind of thing. He knew the boy wasn’t a virgin and hadn’t been for a long time, but something in his chest ached.

Thomas scoffed and muttered, “why am I not surprised?”

Ignoring the remark, Minho ran a hand through his hair to restyle his signature quiff a little. “I’m going to teach you guys exactly how to initiate this.”

With a clap of his hands and a quick leap up from the bed, Minho smiled down at them both, “I’m going to teach you both the ‘art of the threesome’!”

Thomas tried his hardest to not burst out into laughter so he bit down on his lip, but Newt swallowed hard, nerves building up inside his stomach, making him feel sick. He had no idea what Minho had planned or what this was going to involve.

With an enthusiastic nod, Thomas stood up too and Newt wondered how on earth he could be so fine with this? Then the realisation hit him. Thomas wasn’t in the same situation as him. He wasn’t falling for his own best friend.

Minho began to talk them through the basics of how things went and then took things back to the very start, sitting himself on the bed to observe as the fake couple stood before him.

“So I repeat, first you two strip whilst Teresa watches from where I am. Then you kiss and then one of you will go to the girl and initiate the whole thing. Right, let’s see you try-!”

A ringtone blared from the pocket of the athlete’s jeans and Newt watched as he checked the caller ID. Minho rolled his eyes and groaned, apologising to his friends, as he had to leave them to go to one of his sports team’s practices. Newt wished he wouldn’t go, but he walked his friend downstairs, receiving a hug and a reassuring wink from Minho before he left and the blond returned to his room.

As Newt closed the door behind him it hit him that both he and Thomas were alone. He rubbed his sweating palms on his trousers, as he walked back over to his previous spot in front of Thomas.

“Maybe, uh, we should practice a little,” Thomas chuckled, and Newt detected a hint of nervousness in his voice, “at least, the getting mostly naked in front of one another part before the night.”

The blond held back a yelp and nodded weakly, stepping closer to Thomas.

“I would never in a million years have imagined you and I pretending to have sex to get my girl.”

Newt froze as the brunet chuckled once more, bringing his hands up to the Brit’s sides. His hands rested there for a while as they held each other’s gaze. Eventually, Thomas hinted in his eyes at his next action and began to pull up Newt’s shirt, exposing his pale, flat abdomen. The blond allowed the shirt to be removed entirely so he stood bare chested in front of his best friend, and Thomas shortly removed his own shirt, tossing it aside onto the bed.

He tried his hardest not to swallow and keep his breathing even. Newt didn’t allow himself to think about the distance between them and how only a few layers over their lower regions kept them from being entirely naked in front of one another.

“What do we do after this?” Thomas asked calmly, but Newt was unable to answer. “Oh yeah, I remember.”

Newt couldn’t breathe. This same sensation happened every time Thomas leant in towards him, leaving him frozen to the spot. He closed his eyes nonetheless, expecting to feel the brunet’s soft lips at any second, as Thomas’ hot ragged breath brushed lightly over his mouth.

About to close the distance happily, Newt heard his door swing open, half expecting for it to either be Minho or Brenda.

“What the _hell_ do you two think you are doing?”

Newt pulled back, eyes opening wide as he turned his head towards where his mother stood in his doorway, arms folded.

“M-mum!” Newt blurted out, heart pounding in his chest so hard it felt like it would break through his rib cage at any second. Shit. Shit shit shit _fuck_ , he thought, trying to cover as much of his bare chest as he could with his arms.

Thomas, although seemingly just as startled as Newt, took step forward in front of the boy to shield him from the view of his own mother. Newt placed a shaky hand on his upper arm, willing him to not stray any further.

“I’m sorry, Anne – nothing was going to happen, I was only going to kiss him… with our tops off.” Thomas’ voice sounded uncertain and not it’s usual upbeat demeanour. It made the blond feel even more uneasy, peering at his face over the boy’s shoulder.

“Thomas, if I may so kindly ask you to leave my house,” the short blonde woman asked as kindly as she could through gritted teeth.

“Look, this isn’t Newt’s fault, please.” Thomas insisted, hand out with his palm facing towards his best friend’s mother to try and ease her anger, hopefully calming her down. It was such a protective stance; Newt’s mind was hazy and confused at this whole situation and hoped that if someone pinched him, it would turn out to be some horrible dream.

“Get out of my house,” Anne repeated again, less friendly this time but not moving from her spot.

With a deep breath, Newt emerged from behind Thomas and stood by his side, an arm still across his chest as the other hand stayed firmly on the boy’s upper arm.

“No, mum. He’s not going anywhere. Tommy, you don’t have to listen to her.” His voice was heavy with anger.

“Put your shirt on and leave my house this second.” Anne’s voice lowered, full of spite. The blond shook his head; so completely furious it was bringing him to the brim of tears.

He went to stop the brunet from listening to her again as the boy slid back into his shirt, but Thomas interjected, resting a hand on the blond’s shoulder. “It’s fine, Newt. I was leaving anyway. I’ll see you at school.”

As one final act of rebelling, Newt leaned forward and pressed a soft kiss to Thomas’ lips that lasted less than three seconds, before the brunet was on his way out of the door without another word uttered to his best friend’s mother.

The silence between Newt and his mother seemed deafeningly loud and the blond reached for his crumpled top.

“What in the bloody hell is wrong with you, mum? Why did you do that? What gave you the _right_?”

“I will not have you engaging in that sort of thing in my house. I’m your mother and what I say, goes.” Anne stepped further into her son’s room, approaching the furious teenager slowly, “Thomas is a lovely boy and I’m sorry I was so stern, but now that you’re… _gay_ , well, as I said, I’m not comfortable having him in here alone with you.”

“What is your problem?” Newt backed away a few steps, raising his voice slightly so it was on the verge of breaking. “Do you mind me being with Thomas or not?”

Anne knew her boundaries and stopped at the end of the bed, aware that any more steps closer would result in a bad situation between them – worse than it currently was.

“As I said, Newtie, you’ll get over this little phase once you meet the right woman.” She smiled sweetly as if she understood everything, and Newt glared at her as his mother nodded, retreating back downstairs so he was alone in his room.

He was inexplicably angry with his mother. Furious. And completely mortified.

Newt fell back on his bed, letting himself lie there and stare up at the ceiling for a while before he rolled over to grab his phone off his nightstand. His fingers typed in his passcode and opened the messages app to text Thomas and apologise for all the shit that had just happened.

 

**Tommy: no worries man**

**Tommy: ur mom just overreacted**

**Tommy: I think that’s normal when u catch ur son and his best friend about to make out**

**Tommy: hell i’d probably be the same at first**

 

Newt gulped, heart aching in his chest. He wetted his lips and furrowed his eyebrows before muttering to himself in reply to Thomas’ messages, “I wouldn’t be.”

His phone buzzed again in his hands and his eyes trailed back to the bright screen.

**Tommy: my dads old work apartment is completely empty. was thinking 3some there?**

 

The whole ordeal of the threesome had completely slipped from Newt’s mind until that moment. The fact he was going to be initiating sex with Thomas… and Teresa. With a gulp, he replied ‘sure’ and locked his phone, setting it aside again.

Newt refused to come down for dinner that evening, a knock on the door coming around an hour later as Brenda appeared with a plateful of food to give to him before retreating from his room.

He was unable to concentrate on the homework he’d decided to do, thoughts and images of his mother’s hurt and angry face from homecoming and that evening swam around his mind, accompanied by fantasies of what it would be like to be on top of Thomas, panting hard as he trailed kisses down his sweaty neck and…

The pencil in Newt’s mouth snapped as he bit down hard on it, lost in his thoughts. He gagged at the taste of lead and spat out the splinters. With a groan, he kicked the work off his bed and lay back, burying himself in the mess of pillows at the end of the bed.

God, he hoped everything would work itself out somehow, and he hoped it would happen soon. He deserved something good to happen to him just once.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> we could not apologise more for the super delayed update. there were some issues at first with lost work and in the end i just had to take on this chapter and power through it to get it done and delivered for you guys. It's not the most action-packed chapter and not the longest either, but it's all building up we promise. who here is up for a newthomesa threesome? :)
> 
> i hope this is substantial enough to get you through until the next update WHICH WILL HOPEFULLY BE MUCH SOONER THAN THIS ONE.
> 
> we were also thinking of writing an add-on fic that explores some of the key moments in stta from thomas' pov. would anyone like to see that as this fic comes to an end (quite a while away but still!!) considering there are so many big thomas scenes that are half-unexplored and this would be the perfect opportunity to see what he is thinking at certain moments. leave a comment below and just mention whether you'd like it or not!
> 
> thank you so much for reading, commenting and sharing this silly little fanfic as it continues to grow (wow 6k reads???) because it means so very much. we love you
> 
> tarantism


	10. ten

Newt was awoken the next morning by a staggered tapping on his window of different strengths. The blond stretched out the muscles in his face and rubbed his eyes with a groan, rolling onto his side to reach for his alarm. As his eyes adjusted to the light, he blinked a few times and furrowed his eyebrows. It was six-fifteen in the morning.

“Who the bloody hell?” He croaked, sitting up in a huff with whoever decided to wake him this early. Newt flung his legs over the side of his bed and made his way slowly towards the window, throwing open the curtains.

Unlatching the window, Newt yawned and leaned out with a stretch before he smacked his lips and a small rock hit the wall beside him. The contact caused the blond to jump slightly and knock the top of his head on the frame of the window – he brought his hand up to rub the sore spot, wincing down at the figure below.

“Sorry, Newt! Hey, get on some shoes and let’s walk!”

“Oh, for goodness sake, Tommy!” Newt frowned, whisper-yelling at his best friend in his driveway, “It’s six in the morning! Can’t it wait?”

Thomas threw his arms up and then let his hands slip into the pockets of his jeans. He was already here and dressed, Newt doubted the brunet would just leave and come back.

“I haven’t been to sleep – _couldn’t_ get to sleep. And it probably could, but you’re up now so.”

With a roll of his eyes, Newt ran a hand through his messy hair and sighed. “I’ll be down in fifteen.”

He retreated back inside and shut the window, before heading for the bathroom to shower and get ready. He jumped in and out of the cold spray of water, pulled on some underwear, trousers, shirt and a coat before looking at himself in the mirror. He didn’t look terrible, a little sleep deprived but that wasn’t anything unusual.

After a few deep breaths, Newt tore his eyes from his reflection, grabbed his bag, slipped on his shoes and then stepped outside to find Thomas smoking on his porch, perched on one of the steps leading to his door.

“Good morning, but not really.” Newt bumped Thomas’ back with his knee lightly to prove his irritation.

“I didn’t intentionally mean to wake you this early. I was just… jittery.” The brunet made a shaking action with his hand before offering a cigarette to Newt, who refused this early despite his annoyance.

“Yeah, yeah. You’ve gotten yourself all excited, so let’s go.”

Thomas jumped up and took one last smoke of the roll-up before chucking to the ground. He blunted it with his shoe before hop, skipping and jumping over to his parked car. As Newt approached the vehicle, the brunet opened the door smugly for him.

“You really need to stop doing that,” Newt snorted, sliding in.

“Please, you love it.” He scoffed back and ran around to the driver’s side.

“So where are we off to two hours before school?”

“We’re going to this hide out place I found.”

Newt turned to Thomas as the car started and they pulled out of the driveway. “And is there any particular reason why this secret place?”

“It’s cozy. And it’s just so we can chat away from all the hustle and bustle,” Thomas looked over at his best friend for a split second, a chuckle spreading across his lips, “I promise I’m not taking you there to die.”

“We couldn’t have spoken at school?”

“I told you – I couldn’t sleep.”

 

* * *

 

 

They reached the secret spot and quickly jumped out after parking relatively close by. Newt folded his arms and frowned as Thomas bee-lined for a flight of stairs up the side of an old brick building. He waved a hand at the blond, prompting for him to follow and Newt did. He always followed Tommy.

It took a good five minutes of huffing and puffing and realising both of them needed to do more exercise, before they finally reached the top of the fairly high industrial building. It was a relatively dank and dusty place, but you could see for miles around as the sun poked its head out from just beyond the horizon, painting the sky with its rosy-fingers. Newt almost lost himself in the beauty.

The brunet walked out across the roof and stopped at the edge where a panel of ground was slightly raised, letting himself half fall, half lower himself onto the edge. Newt followed suit and sat down beside his best friend, not caring to dangle his legs over the side of the building like Thomas was doing.

“Tommy, just… be careful, will you?” Newt swallowed nervously, hugging his knees to his chest as he caught a glimpse of what was below them in what seemed to be the most deserted part of town he’d ever been in.

Turning slightly towards Newt, Thomas smirked and laid back, hands resting behind his head as if he were sunbathing at sunrise.

“I wanted to talk… and ask if you’re free tonight.”

The hope that Newt had built up inside on the drive over to the building felt hollow inside him when he caught on immediately to what this sudden question was all about.

“This is about the threesome, isn’t it?”

Thomas bit his lip and crinkled the corners of his eyes, “Yeah.”

Newt rolled his eyes to ignore the hurt and took in a small breath. “Well, the answer is that yes, I am free.”

“Are you sure?” Thomas sat up, shuffling closer so he was leaning in towards Newt, “because you don’t have to go through with this if you don’t want to. I understand if you’re scared – I mean, I’m scared, but if you’re there with me all that fear kinda just… goes away, you know?”

The thought of backing off and leaving Thomas to struggle on his own did cross Newt’s mind, but then he thought of how bad of a friend that would make him. But then his mind linked onto the thought that if he didn’t go along tonight, he would lose his only possible chance to engage sexually with Thomas, or something close to it anyway.

“No, there’s not a chance that I would blurt this idea out and then leave you alone. I’m helping you.”

A smile as radiant as the rising sun in front of them shone from Thomas’ mouth. The light illuminated all the crinkles and crevices of his face, all which sparkled with happiness as he beamed at his best friend. Newt had never seen something so exquisitely ethereal.

“Alright then. I guess this is happening! But you know the deal, right? We do that first bit like Minho said, and then after you make up some sort of excuse to leave so it’s me and Teresa, yeah?”

The world suddenly seemed darker at the mention of her name.

Newt’s eye twitched but he nodded slowly.

They lay there for a while, Thomas with his legs dangling off the edge, Newt just lying back carefully, curled up beside his best friend as they watched the sun appear fully from behind the buildings in the distance. Eventually the hurt Newt felt washed away with the dusk.

“We need to get to school.” Newt checked his watch and sat up, messing his hair back into place.

“What a nerd.” Thomas chuckled, swiping his legs back onto solid ground before he stood, offering a hand to help the blond up too.

The brunet led Newt down the stairs and the blond had to tear his eyes from watching Thomas’ ass the whole way down like he had done when they were ascending. He had a nice ass, he found himself thinking and scoffed at his own thoughts.

“You got that?” Thomas asked over his shoulder and Newt scrunched up his nose, realising he hadn’t been listening to anything the boy had been saying.

“I’m sorry, can you repeat it?”

“I said,” He reiterated as they reached the ground and headed for the car, “meet at my dad’s work apartment around eight, okay?”

With a nod, Newt half jogged to the car and without warning, the blond found himself stumble forward and stop, a throbbing emanating from his foot. “Ouch. Bloody mother of fffff-!”

Thomas was on him in seconds, his hand gasping the top of Newt’s arm for support, “you okay, man?”

“Yeah, I think I just caught it on a loose bit of pavement when I wasn’t looking. I’m such an idi-! What are you doing?” Newt yelped as he was whisked off his feet, bridal style.

“Wow, look at us.” Thomas chuckled and began to carry Newt towards his car down the street. “How cute do you think we look right now?”

If it wasn’t for his enjoyment of being this close in Thomas’ arms, Newt would’ve damned his foot and stood up to punch the mocking asshole in his perfect face.

“You don’t have to carry me, I’m perfectly fine.”

“Nah, it’s alright. Wouldn’t want you limping to the car and making us late – like that time you jumped off that climbing wall without a harness at my party, and I was stuck with an even slower, limping version of you for weeks!”

Newt smiled and chuckled at the memory of Thomas’ eleventh adventure birthday party at the leisure centre, subconsciously huddling closer to his best friend until he was put down a minute later outside the car.

Once they both climbed inside, the brunet drove fifteen minutes to the school grounds and parked up, going about their day as usual – almost as if in a number of hours the pair of them would be involved in their hastily planned threesome.

 

* * *

 

When school finally ended, Newt was feeling so nervous about that evening that he even felt a little sick. He made sure to tread lightly out of school in case he did decide to actually spew. But as he was about to make it out of the building and into fresh air, Minho stopped him in his tracks with a friendly grin, lessening Newt’s pain a little. The jock always made him feel at ease.

“Remember about tonight, don’t you dare leave him and Teresa alone. Go get him,” Minho winked, clapping the top of his arm as he walked past the blond, “oh, and wear something sexy if you can!”

Newt stood watching as Minho jogged away and pondered what had just been said. He questioned how Minho knew it was tonight, but brushed that aside as the blond began racking his mind to think of something sexy to wear. He presumed that the dressing sexily part was usually for the women, but Newt hoped he had something in his closet that could do the trick.

The bus home seemed to take longer than usual as Newt chewed on his lip and bounced his knee up and down in anticipation, almost missing his stop. But he pressed the bell and exited the transport to run back inside and ransack his dressers.

Shoving his hand deep into the various draws, Newt pulled out shirts and socks and average underwear, until he grabbed hold of something at the back of his boxers draw. The blond yanked it out, the label from the Christmas he’d received it on still attached to the waistband.

 

**_To Newt, now your mom and I are living together, I get to embarrass you like a dad! Don’t wear this sexy thing too often. Merry Xmas! Love Steve xx_ **

 

His cheeks flared red at the memory of picking up the black underwear in his hands from under the Christmas tree, seeing that the back half of the boxers were a soft yet translucent fabric that exposed your ass, making it look ‘perky’. Newt had immediately ran upstairs and hidden the clothing in the back of his underwear draw where it had remained until this day. That was two Christmases ago and Newt still didn’t like them, but he guessed they classified as sexy? Here’s hoping they’ll fit, he thought as he closed his bedroom door and slipped out of his current attire.

The fabric slid up easily and the whole thing was generally a comfortable fit, but when he looked in the mirror at his body in just the underwear, Newt hoped it wouldn’t be too much, or too bold. He decided to just calm down and wear the underwear  - it wasn’t like it would stay on too long anyway if he were lucky.

Crap, Newt thought and his legs began to shake at the thought of the possible outcomes of the night. With a check of the time, he saw he still had three hours before he had to be at the destination, which calmed his mind a little for the moment.

He decided that the best thing to do would to be to take a shower and make himself look presentable. He settled on styling his hair once he was back in his underwear, borrowing some of Steve’s gel and aftershave to give him an older, hopefully experienced-ish aroma about him.

Stepping back into his bedroom, Newt accepted that this was it; he was going to go to that house and not back out. He spent the next hour and a half talking himself through the idea and psyching himself up in the mirror. He questioned many things about his appearance, but his alarm sounded and there was no time to change now.

He scurried over to his closet, biting down on his lip as he pulled on a white shirt and spotted the black coat he hadn’t worn in so long. It was long, almost down to his knees and so very warm – he pulled it out and slipped the jacket on, wrapping it around him so it concealed everything underneath. He knew it was the finishing piece in his outfit.

As he cursed at the time (seven-twenty, and he needed to make a stop off at the pharmacy beforehand), Newt started down the stairs silently, sneaking past his mum and almost stepdad in the lounge, resting against one another as they watched the TV. Just as he believed he had made it to the front door in a perfect run, the trill voice of his beloved almost stepsister rang out from the stairs.

“Where are you going?”

Shit, Newt thought, hand on the doorknob still as he craned his neck to look at the brunette, arms folded. “Uh, out?”

“Yeah, clearly. What’s with the coat?”

Newt let go of the handle and sighed, whispering, “It’s cold out, Brenda.”

“Tell me where you’re going, or I’ll tell mom.”

The word ‘mom’ made Newt cringe at how close she and his mother had gotten, but he couldn’t think about that just now.

“I’m going to Thomas’. Don’t worry.” He assured her and made one final reach for the doorknob, opening the exit quietly before stepping outside, not caring about Brenda.

Jolting to the car, the adrenaline pumping around Newt’s body at that moment made him feel a little giddy, pulling out of the driveway before he headed in the direction of the pharmacy and the final destination.

Luckily for Newt, the drugstore wasn’t too far from his house and on the way to Thomas’ dad’s work apartment, so he hopped out and quickly dashed in to buy (extremely embarrassed) condoms and a bottle of something that sat beside it that read ‘for lubrication’. Newt didn’t dare make eye contact with the shift worker as he tossed a few bills over to her, grabbed the items and ran back out to his car.

The rest of the journey he spent chuckling to himself as he stuffed his purchases in the car draw and turned on his car lights. It was funny, Newt thought, how he was going to hopefully be intimate with Thomas in such a fond place full of childhood memories.

He remembered when Thomas’ dad used to have to work late nights on the other side of town and so was too tired to drive the whole way home, using this flat as a halfway house where he could rest overnight and continue his journey home in the morning. He and Thomas used to spend most weekends here, despite it being a shabby little apartment; the boys loved it and thought of it like a secret base or fortress, away from the life of the city.

Newt parked up, turning off the car engine before taking several enormous breaths. He could see Thomas’ mom’s crappy Toyota minivan already parked up, meaning the brunet had gotten there early – probably to throw rose petals on the bed knowing him.

Unbuckling himself and stepping out of the car, Newt pulled his coat tighter around him and approached the front door. He tried to compose himself as he lifted a fist, moving to knock on the door only to find it open.

“Seems like we’re both here just in time.”

The blond craned his head to see Teresa, all dressed up in a very low cut, very tight and very short red dress. Despite his constant want to strangle the girl for taking the one thing he wanted so dearly from him, he couldn’t deny that she looked gorgeous and smoking hot in that dress.

Shaking himself out of his thoughts, Newt nodded and opened the door with his palm before walking inside first. He led the way through the narrow hall once Teresa had shut the door, approaching the master bedroom to find Thomas pacing inside.

Like a gentleman, Newt stepped aside to let Teresa walk into the room first, playing slightly along with the idea that he was completely okay with her being there. But he wasn’t.

He regretted it immediately though, as when Thomas saw her he stopped in his tracks, took her completely in from head to toe and swallowed in disbelief. That twinge of jealousy itched at the back of Newt’s neck and his toes curled. But then Thomas saw Newt and the blond frowned. His expression was different, unreadable. And that scared him.

Once they had all settled into the room and surroundings, the three of them sat awkwardly on the edge of the queen size bed, Thomas in between his two guests.

“So,” Thomas started, trying his best to break the ice despite his obvious nervous twitch of his eye, “shall we do this?”

Newt turned his head only slightly to watch Thomas as he swallowed and stood up, offering a seemingly quivering hand for the blond to take so they were both standing in front of Teresa.

Bloody hell. This is happening, Newt thought as he tried to steady his ragged breathing, heart beating faster and faster.

Teresa shuffled back on the bed so that she was lying at the headrest, watching as the two boys stood in front of one another nervously. Her gaze bore into their sides and it only made trying to calm himself harder for Newt.

Then, without warning, Newt’s eyes were fixed as he watched Thomas shakily reach for the first button of his shirt, pulling it open slowly, gaze fixed on Newt. The blond had no choice but to look into his best friend’s eyes, face beginning to flush as the brunet’s slender fingers worked at removing the fabric from his skin. Eventually, after what seemed like forever but was only a few seconds, Thomas slipped out of his shirt and let it drop to his side, reaching down to start unbuckling his jeans.

Once again, Newt watched his fingers and found it exceedingly hard to shift the lump in his throat as Thomas stepped out of them, leaving him only in his boxers a few inches from him.

Newt completely forgot Teresa was there.

It was his turn now. The blond started to move his own quaking hand to unfasten his thick coat slowly, hand dragging on the fabric before he popped open another button. As it came undone, he looked up just in time to see Thomas biting his lip with that same expression from earlier that he just couldn’t understand.

The blond closed his eyes, letting the calm fill him as best as he could before he counted to five and let the coat drop, quickly tugging off his shirt after. This left him with only his pants to get rid of before he too was half naked.

When he opened his eyes gradually, he swore that there was a slight difference in Thomas’ breathing, as if it were more fragmented to match his dilated pupils. This was a mistake to observe as they made eye contact again, just as Newt began to undo his belt.

The clinking metal of the buckle filled the humid air and the jeans loosened, causing Newt to shiver as he let the trousers drop completely to the ground. With a quick step out of them so the clothing wasn’t bundled around his ankles, Newt looked up once more at his best friend’s face, watching as the brunet’s chestnut eyes drifted from his own, to his crotch. And Thomas was very much holding his breath.

The blond could see clearly the brunet’s ears flushing red, and as his best friend breathed out his breath caught momentarily in his throat.

The room around them was a blur, just the two of them stood in front of each other, shivering from both the heat of the situation and the cold of the surrounding. Newt drunk in the scene before him: his beautiful companion, who feared only the greatest evils in the world, nervous as a freshman on his first day at high school.

As gently as he could, Newt brushed delicate fingers along Thomas’ jawline, counting the moles he traced as he did. He could feel the brunet’s hesitance, but the familiarity of Newt caused the brunet to blink and wake himself slightly from his trance.

Taking a step forward so their noses were almost touching, Newt wetted his lips and smiled softly.

“Relax.”

Thomas finally moved his gaze upwards to Newt’s face once again, blinking a few more times before he stared at the blond’s lips. The Brit’s breath was hot on Thomas’ face and got more intense as Newt leaned in, taking the brunet’s wrists by his sides in his hands lightly. Thomas shivered.

With one last deep breath, Newt finally closed the distance, pressing his lips oh so softly against Thomas’ to begin with, until the brunet sighed against them and added more pressure.

Newt’s whole body was set alight, the beat of his heart pulsing all around his body as he moved a hand up to grip Thomas’ shoulder, lips opening and closing around each other, eyes closed; Thomas had his eyelids screwed shut, but Newt’s were light, in complete bliss.

Unexpectedly, Newt felt Thomas’ hand curl around his neck, pulling him in even deeper. At this his heart felt like it was punching at his insides as their bare chests touched, screaming at him to just tell Thomas how he felt. He breathed out a hot breath from his nose instead, and tried with all his might not to make an inappropriate noise into Thomas’ mouth at that moment, tilting his head to the side to deepen the kiss.

One hand wove its way subconsciously to Thomas’ waist. The thumb there caressed his hip ever so lightly, tracing circles on the skin to remind the brunet that he was here; they were in this together. _I got you_. Thomas shivered.

Newt’s cheek was cupped softly as they stopped their mouths moving, catching their breath as they moved their faces inches away. Newt was the first to open his eyes, and watched as Thomas’ eyelashes fluttered on his eyelids as they opened to reveal those doe eyes he loved so much.

He felt the strong urge to lean in again, and he realised that this moment was his only chance. So Newt leaned in to press chaste kisses to Thomas’ lips, starting at the side of his mouth, and when their lips met fully this time it was only a short kiss. But Newt found the corners of his mouth turning up before they parted again and he heard Thomas mumble, so faintly it was indecipherable to anyone further away than the blond.

“Woah.”

His heart somersaulted alongside his stomach in what felt like a paired acrobatics performance. The blond smiled, eyes crinkling.

“I know.”

And he moved in again, but Thomas turned his head towards where Teresa was sat just slightly. The brunet bit his lip and looked back at Newt. There was confusion in Thomas’ eyes and Newt frowned, tilting his head.

“I… can’t do this. I’m sorry.” Thomas’ voice quivered as he leant over to grab his clothes before shuffling out of the room, leaving Newt and Teresa completely dumbfounded.

Stood glued to the spot, Newt clenched and unclenched his fists when he heard the front door open and close. Had he done something wrong?

Turning to Teresa, Newt swallowed and shook his head, “You need to leave.”

Teresa looked just as confused as he was, but she stood up to leave without saying a word.

Newt quickly went to the window to open it and lean out, hoping to spot Thomas walking away but he wasn’t there anymore. With a defeated sigh, the blond closed the window and gathered his clothes up to get dressed, suddenly feeling very self-conscious in his attire despite the absence of an audience.

When fully clothed once more, Newt draped his coat around him and headed outside to give one final look for his best friend. But as he expected he wasn’t there, so with a sigh the blond locked up the apartment with the key he knew was under the mat.

He tottered down to his car, slipping inside and starting the engine to warm himself up. Newt brought his knees up to his chest on the seat, careful not to knock them on the steering wheel and held his head in his hands.

“What the hell just happened?” He muttered under his breath. First, he was making out with his best friend, and then Thomas looked at him with that… face, one Newt had never seen before and couldn’t decipher. And then the brunet had left so quickly…

He took the wheel in his hands and leant his forehead against the top lightly, taking deep breaths to calm him down. Tonight had been the first time Newt hadn’t been able to know what Thomas was thinking by reading his expressions and that made him very anxious.

Stuffing his hand in the pocket of his coat to retrieve his phone, Newt pulled out the stuff he’d got at the pharmacy and angrily shoved them into the front compartment. He then tried the other pocket and grabbed his cell, unlocking it to dial Thomas’ number. After about eight rings the phone went to voicemail, as Thomas hadn’t picked up.

Newt turned on the engine and backed out of the driveway, heading for the Murphy household. Where was he? Newt chewed on his lip, keeping an eye out for his best friend, but once he drove past the brunet’s house he saw the car wasn’t parked there. This meant Thomas was still driving out and about.

This set Newt completely on edge; returning to his house he ran up to his room, wishing and praying that Thomas was up there, sat on his roof with a cigarette in his mouth and legs dangling over the edge.

Approaching the window to look out, the blond’s heart sunk when it turned out that his best friend wasn’t there. He walked backwards and flopped onto his bed, sighing. He only hoped that after tonight’s events that his friendship with Thomas wasn’t completely crushed, and that everything would be okay in the morning.

Newt felt completely responsible for what happened – he had been the one to suggest the idea (physically to the pair, although Minho had planted the thought in his mind) and then went full steam ahead on his plans to sleep with Thomas that night, despite him knowing he was still interested in Teresa – or thought he was.

Could Thomas lose interest in Teresa? No matter how much Newt wished, the answer was _probably not overnight_ , but he didn’t want to remove himself from the picture just yet. He was only getting started.

Making sure his notification volume was at full just in case Thomas called or texted, Newt finally removed himself from his stupid not-sexy-at-all clothes and grabbed a fresh, comfy pair of boxers for the night before slipping under the duvet. Placing the phone next to his pillow by his head, Newt fell asleep worrying about his best friend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I suck so badly at updating, but forgive me as it's almost exam season and there has been a lot of problems. But never fret - this chapter is up! ~ Finally
> 
> AAAAAND the threesome didn't go ahead, much like the show. But I hope that this chapter tickled your fancy for a while and leaves you wondering where the hell thomas is :-)
> 
> I can't promise quick updates, but just know that if there is a huge break between posting chapters that it doesnt mean we've given up on this fic - something to talk about isn't going anywhere soon.
> 
> Thank you so much for reading and feel free to leave any comments on your thoughts on a few short chapters being written from thomas' POV at the end of the story, just to know what is going on in this boy's mind in a few key moments. and also just comment and read away! 
> 
> Until next time.  
> tarantism (rosie)


	11. eleven

**Tommy: im sorry**

 

Newt sprung up the next morning when he heard the chime of his phone going off, alerting him loudly to a text from his best friend. He opened iMessage, a sigh of relied escaping his mouth. He hadn’t slept well all night due to the anxiety surrounding Thomas’ whereabouts.

 

**Newt: oh thank god! where are you?**

 

When five minutes passed and Thomas didn’t reply or open the message, Newt went to shower and get dressed, getting himself ready for the day. He tugged on a pair of black skinny jeans and a button-up shirt before seeing his phone light up and beep.

 

**Tommy: dont worry about me. go 2 school.**

 

Thomas texted him with such a blunt tone that Newt worried it wasn’t actually his best friend, but some kind of imposter. The apprehension began to creep back in.

 

**Newt: i'll see you there, okay? we can talk about this**

 

Once again, there was no reply straight away so the blond carefully packed his things for lessons that day, making his own way to school that morning whilst he ate his takeaway breakfast of toast.

The second he arrived at school, girls of all ages began to stare and throw flirtatious looks Newt’s way, and some of the boys clapped him on the back, congratulating him. The blond hardly knew any of the people that spoke to him but just nodded, going along with whatever it was they were congratulating him about; was it about homecoming? No, that celebration was all over and done with – it had to be something else.

Newt didn’t know how to handle all the attention without Thomas by his side so he scanned the crowd for him, twisting and turning as he walked through the halls. When he was unable to find the brunet, his heart felt heavy in his chest and he went to his first class. Maybe the boy was just late? Or so he hoped.

But when Newt still couldn’t find him at their usual spot at lunch, his heart clenched again and he began retreating to a corner outside of the school, where he would sit against the brick wall and eat alone.

As he headed to this spot, Newt carried his food in one hand and the other fished out his phone. He was just about to text Thomas for the umpteenth time when Minho appeared out of nowhere, slapping him on the butt with a grin on his face.

“So… How was it?”

“What was what?” Newt looked confusedly at his friend, pursing his lips. Then it hit him and he remembered. “Oh! The threesome? I, er, don’t want to talk about it…”

“Well, you may not want to but the whole school is buzzing about it.” Minho kept on grinning, “so, how was Thomas? Did all go according to plan?”

Newt did a double take as he went to walk again, “Wait, _what?_ How does the whole school know that me, Tommy and Teresa went to have a threesome?”

Minho frowned, a look of confusion on his face now. “Teresa.”

_Oh, that little…_

“Now come on, did you do what I told you to do?”

Feeling his lip curl slightly, Newt snarled, “She told the whole school that we went through with it?”

“W-wait, you didn’t?”

With a shake of the blond’s head, Minho’s mouth formed a small ‘o’ before he followed his friend outside, both taking a seat in Newt’s original intended spot. Newt placed his food tray to the side and the jock asked him what actually happened.

“Well, we did the whole undress routine, and I wore what I would class as sexy underwear. And Thomas had this look on his face… he looked at me in a way he never did before and I don’t know what it meant.” He bit his lip, pausing to catch his breath as he rushed through the tale.

“And then we kissed; one time I swear he was enjoying it, Minho. I swear he was.”

Newt’s heart thudded extra loud as he replayed the kiss in his mind. The thought caused him to place two fingers lightly to his lips, and then he refocused on Minho beside him, remembering he couldn’t daydream like that now.

“That’s shucking great news, Newt! Damn. Then what?”

The blond took a breath, continuing to look at Minho before he mumbled, “He just… left. He said he ‘couldn’t do this’ and just left. And now he’s not in school and I don’t know where he is, whether he’s in trouble or… What if he’s disgusted, Minho? What if he is disgusted and hates me now?”

Surprisingly, Minho took Newt’s face in his hands, turning the blond’s head to him as it had lowered in sadness.

“Hey, Newt. Look at me. Don’t think like that. Don’t just presume things you don’t know, alright?”

Blinking a few times, Newt nodded when his friend let his cheeks go. “I just want to talk to him.”

“I know you do.” A pat on the shoulder comforted him a little until Minho scoffed and joked, “He’s probably jacking off at the thought of you right now.”

Newt swallowed the lump in his throat and ran his hands through his knotted hair. He cherished Minho’s optimism, being a great friend to him in this situation.

“I can’t believe Teresa told everyone, including me, that you actually went through with the threesome last night.” Minho shook his head in disbelief.

“I don’t care,” Newt muttered, bringing his knees up to his chest, hugging them tightly. “I just want Tommy to be okay.”

Minho leant over and hugged Newt, wrapping the blond in a huge bear hug in his strong arms. “Let’s not think about that. All right? Thomas is a tough cookie and has an even tougher ass.”

Newt found himself chuckling at that as they pulled away, feeling much better.

“Let’s talk about… how Thomas kissed you back! How was it?”

He appreciated how hard the boy was trying to make him feel better.

Newt shrugged, not managing to hide the smile forming on his face as he thought about their lips moving against each other.

“S’alright I suppose.”

With a raise of an eyebrow, Minho smirked, “Just ‘alright’?”

The smaller boy smiled wider, burying his face into his knees like a giddy first grader. “Okay, fine! It was amazing.”

Newt blushed and hid his face deeper in his knees. “I even forgot Teresa was there. God, Min. I would’ve just had him right there if I could’ve.”

Minho smiled at the sight of his friend all happy and bubbly, reaching over to rub a hand on his back, “What did I tell ya? I’m sure Thomas will come to his senses soon enough.”

The bell rang after another ten minutes, the pair sitting together just eating and chatting. They stood to leave, Minho standing first before offering a hand to help Newt up. The blond beamed and thanked his friend for everything before they said their goodbyes, heading for their next separate classes.

  

* * *

 

 

The day went by and so did the next, without a word from Thomas. As Newt got in his car, ready to go home after another long day of high school, he couldn’t stop thinking about the brunet and what had happened two nights prior. The thought occupied his mind the whole way home and he was surprised to make it back to his house alive.

As Newt pulled up into his driveway, someone stood up from the porch, in full view of the blond as he parked. It was Thomas.

Turning the engine off quickly and completely forgetting about his bag, Newt exited the car swiftly and put a palm to his forehead as he approached his best friend.

“Newt…”

The sick feeling of worry washed away, leaving Newt almost breathless as he stood before the brunet.

“Oh god, Tommy. Thank bloody heavens.”

He thought about walking closer to him still to just embrace the brunet in a hug, but he held his ground. However, it seemed he didn’t need to as Thomas surprisingly pulled Newt into his arms for a hug.

Newt’s arms hung limply at his sides for a second as the boy held him tightly, but he soon reciprocated the embrace, burying his head into Thomas’ shoulder.

As he held him, warmth washing over the blond, he heard Thomas mutter, “I’m sorry. I’m so, so unbelievably sorry.”

“Don’t you bloody dare scare me like that again, Tommy,” Newt said sternly, but with affection, as he tightened his grip around the brunet. “Ever.”

He could tell Thomas was tense and he bit his lip. “Why did you apologise?”

“I ruined our friendship, didn’t I? I went too far and now it’s not the same. I can’t drag you into this crap anymore…”

Newt furrowed his eyebrows, small frown lines appearing on his forehead as Thomas pulled back.

“What are you suggesting, Tommy?” The blond stood up straight, folding his arms across his chest as his heart began to thump painfully against his ribs again.

“I mean,” Thomas started, not meeting Newt’s eyes for a few seconds, “we should drop this. We’ll stop pretending that we’re dating and go back to being friends.”

As Thomas reiterated, Newt’s expression changed. He felt an overwhelming sadness once again creep over him; he knew he should say no and disagree with Thomas, but then he realised his affection would be even more obvious to a seemingly oblivious brunet.

“I-if that’s what you want, then yeah, sure.” Newt smiled weakly, trying to keep his voice steady and happy to oblige.

With a nod, Thomas shuffled his feet and stared into Newt’s eyes. “Yeah, I mean that’s what you said you wanted after we won homecoming… and here we are.”

Was that _sadness_ Newt detected in the brunet’s voice?

“Will we ever be the same? Y’know, after what happened with the Thing?” The Brit couldn’t help but ask. He realised that if their friendship meant a lot to Thomas, he had to know if the Night’s events had crossed the line or not.

With a full smile, Thomas clapped Newt on the shoulder. “Of course we will. What’s a little making out between mates, huh? Besides, you’re still my best friend, that’s never going to change – hasn’t in ten years and sure as hell isn’t now.”

With a few large thuds of his heart, Newt sighed and let out a laugh that the brunet soon joined in with. It was a laugh with hidden sadness, of course. But Newt would rather be stuck longing painfully after his best friend forever without ever making a move on him, than lose the boy altogether, completely, forever.

As Thomas announced he should head back to see his family, Newt turned to him and asked where exactly he’d been the past two days.

“I, uh, had to figure some stuff out. I’m fine… I’ll be back in school tomorrow.” With a wave, the brunet smiled one last time at his best friend before disappearing off down the road in the direction of his house.

Newt watched as Thomas half-jogged away and he realised… they were done. There would be absolutely no excuses for them to kiss, hold hands, nothing. He felt a strange void inside him and quickly grabbed his things from the car before retreating inside.

He chucked his bag to the side and closed the door with his back, letting out a deep sigh that felt like it originated from the depth of his soul.

“Newt, honey, is that you?” Anne called from their dining room, causing the blond to groan a little. He really didn’t want to speak to his mum right now.

Yet his mother called again and Newt gave in, calling back, “Yeah, it’s me.”

He walked towards the dining room, and upon entering he saw a whole table full of cake slices being tasted. Anne held one delicately in her hand, cutting into the corner of the red sponge with her fork.

“Are these wedding cakes?” He asked, inching closer to her.

With a nod, she shoved the plate and fork she was holding into his hand. “Taste each and every one of them and tell me which one you like the best.”

Newt’s mother smiled as if she hadn’t been shouting at Newt a few nights ago. But there was something in her eyes – were they apologetic? He didn’t know, but he didn’t care to argue with her and so stayed to taste all the cakes.

By the time he’d taken a bit out of his forty-second cake slice and swallowed, his stomach felt like it was going to explode and he concluded that he really couldn’t pick a favourite – they all tasted fairly similar.

“I’ll have whatever you like, mum. I’m going to my room.”

Without waiting for her response – which would more than likely be a mocking complaint at how unhelpful he was – he made his way upstairs, counting the steps on his ascent to the landing.

As he counted the twentieth step and reached the upper floor, Newt bumped into his almost stepdad and apologised quickly.

“Ah, Newt!” Steve shook the incident off happily, a smile on his face, “I wanted to ask when you were at with your best man speech.”

Newt frowned, “I’m supposed to make a speech?”

The balding man chuckled lightly, then realised Newt was serious and nodded slowly with a slight look of concern on his face.

“Of course you’re supposed to make a speech, son,” Oh, _cringe_. “Anyway, it better be a good one, alright? I’m expecting great things from you!”

With a final clap to his back, Newt nodded and Steve walked downstairs to help his fiancé. The blond groaned as he entered his room; he didn’t want to think about a speech or anything right now, just flop onto his bed and hug his pillow.

But, Newt still couldn’t let go of the fact that he and Thomas were no longer faking it. He had been so used to having his hand held by the brunet that it seemed almost terrifying not being able to do that again.

Lying back on his bed, he stared up at the ceiling, wanting to believe that being “just friends” would mean his feelings for Thomas would disappear… but he knew that wasn’t true at all.

Newt put his hands over his face and screwed his eyes shut.

 _Fuck_ , he thought, _I’m in love._

The feeling itself was overpowering him, so he sat up and leant back on his bed frame, looking over at the various photos he had of him and Thomas growing up on his dresser. He let out a humourless laugh as he shook his head, running a hand through his hair.

“Oh, I am so fucked right now.”

Newt replaced his hands with a pillow, letting out a scream into the fabric so it muffled his cry.

How could he be so stupid? Was he really too desperate to find love that he bound his heart to someone that was clearly off limits?

He cried, finally letting the tears and the tension in his body out so it felt limp and weak, just like he was inside.

Scrunching up his nose and eyes to stop the downpour, the tears still built up and streamed down his face, soaking into the pillow. Newt heaved heavy breaths, and these breaths shook every time he tried to take them. Eventually he gave up on trying to stop his tears, but promised himself that he wouldn’t cry about Thomas again after this.

Newt cried for about fifteen minutes, curling up in the middle of his bed. The sudden outpour of emotion that he’d been keeping inside him for weeks had drained him to exhaustion, so he fell asleep fairly quickly on the tear-stained mattress.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i think this is the shortest chapter so far and not the best because im so tired ugh, but it's very important -- newt finally admitted to himself that he's in love! yeeeeeeeees. it's just a shame considering the circumstances gah
> 
> so, a quicker update this time hopefully to tie you over, but again, i have no idea when the next update will be.  
> all the juicy stuff is starting to happen again now and some big things are coming up so stick around for those. and not going to lie but minho and newt's friendship is great, am i right??
> 
> thank you so much for reading, it means ever so much. comments are forever appreciated :-)
> 
> tarantism


	12. twelve

Newt woke up feeling a whole lot better than he did the night prior, though his nose and eyes were sore. With a quick sniff and rub of his eyes like a small child, he realised he had to go and take a hot shower. Taking deep breaths in and out of his mouth rather than blocked nose, he started the water and steam began to fill the room.

Undressing himself, the blond stepped into the shower and straight away placed his hands flat against the cool tiles, letting the hot water scold his back, skin raw and red. Newt lost himself in thought, breathing deeply, the water not even bothering him.

Twenty minutes passed and he only realised how painful his skin had been scorched when Brenda hammered on the door, yelling at him to: “get out – it’s a communal bathroom, asshole!”

He jerked up in shock and nearly took a tumble backwards, slipping slightly on the wet flooring of the shower. He turned it off and dried himself with a towel, ignoring his sister as Newt took another few minutes to brush his teeth.

When he saw his reflection, he knew he looked better now than he did when he first woke up, but unfortunately still looked like a crying mess. With another deep breath, Newt ran his hands through his hair and put on a clean pair of boxers, sniffing.

I can do this, he told himself – after all, he still had Tommy, even if it wasn’t the way he wanted.

Brenda banged on the door again, startling Newt. But he gave up and sighed, walking out of the bathroom. The brunette must’ve seen his swollen eye because she frowned and followed him away.

“What’s wrong?”

The blond covered his face with his hand and entered his room, trying to close the door on his way in, but Brenda easily stopped the action. He darted for a shirt from his hamper to put on quickly, trying to ignore her.

“I asked you a question, Newt.”

He turned around to face his almost stepsister and threw his arms out slightly.

Once she took a good look at him, Brenda scoffed, “Holy shit, you look like crap – what happened?”

“Thanks for the compliment.” Newt rolled his eyes, groaning as he pulled on the top and began to mess around with his hair again.

“Newt,” Brenda folded her arms in the doorway, “I will repeat this again. What the fuck happened that made you look like _that?_ ”

With a sigh, realising she was not backing down, Newt swallowed and rubbed his eyes. “Me and Thomas… broke up.”

Even saying that sounded wrong. Not just because his fake boyfriend had broken up with him, but ending the thing he and Thomas had was a mistake and he knew it.

Newt looked up at Brenda to see her reaction and it wasn’t at all what he had expected. Her eyes were sad for him, and he began to feel that same void-like hollowness in his chest from yesterday.

“I’m sorry about that. Is it because of the, er, threesome?”

Blushing a cherry red, Newt couldn’t believe how he really thought Brenda wouldn’t find out about the incident. He had forgotten how she was the main self-proclaimed Queen Bee and source of all gossip.

“Uh, maybe? Thomas was the one that broke up with me.”

“Oh god, did you do something weird in the bed?” She leaned forward, intrigued.

The blond looked at her, disgusted. “No!”

With a giggle that made Newt’s heart warm up a little, Brenda walked closer and sat beside him on the bed. He began to feel a bit of compassion towards his almost stepsister.

“Tell me what happened for real then.”

“Well, whatever you heard at school is a lie – because we didn’t go through with it.” Newt cleared up the rumour straight out and the brunette nodded, sitting tight on the bed to hear his side of the story.

He told Brenda what happened and he started to think that it was a good idea to tell her, seeing how with her popularity, she might tell all her friends the truth.

“He’s so in love with you!” Brenda announced as soon as Newt’s tale was up, but the blond refused to build up hope again.

He shook his head, eyes falling to his lap as he spoke.

“He broke it off with me because he thought friends suited us better, as it always has…” Newt let out a pained chuckle, “Maybe he’s right… maybe we’re only meant to be friends. It is easier after all.”

“Hey, Newt. I hate you, like so much. But you’re kind of a great person,” Brenda said with a tilt of her head, long hair in her signature ponytail falling over her shoulder. Her words made Newt blush. “And if Thomas can’t see that, then he is dumb as shit. You deserve so much more.”

A dainty hand quickly squeezed his shoulder before Newt could even register that Brenda had up and left to finally use the bathroom.

Newt knew she was right, but he only wanted Thomas.

Slowly getting ready for school finally, he decided to walk for a change. It wasn’t that much longer to walk than to get the bus or take the car, but he wanted the freedom the movement gave him today.

“Newt, Hey!” Someone called from behind when he was about three-quarters of the way to the campus.

With a crane of his head, Newt wished for it to be Thomas in his head over and over, but…

“Oh. Hey, Minho.” He wasn’t disappointed by the sudden appearance of one of his recently closest friends, but he just missed his partner in crime.

“What’s up, my tea-drinking friend?” The jock fell into step beside the thinner boy, his ever-present smirk on his lips.

With a shrug, Newt sighed and forced a smile, “Not much, just feeling like hell.”

“Well, I think you look great, even if you don’t feel it.” Minho nodded and brought his hands up to hold onto the straps of his backpack, arms flexing.

Newt chuckled and shook his head to the floor, “No, I don’t.”

“Yeah, you do.” Minho nudged him playfully, and although the blond was already feeling a little better he wasn’t really in the mood for games. But Minho sensed that. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” He scuffed his shoes along the pavement without looking up at his friend.

“Well, that’s a big fat shucking lie. What’s up, Newt – really?”

“Is it silly that you feel sad over something that you’re not supposed to feel sad about?” Newt said so fast and in one breath, that the blond had to gasp at the end and that Minho hardly caught a word he spoke. The raven-haired boy frowned and pried further with his eyes.

Newt sucked in another huge breath and muttered, “Thomas said we should fake break up being fake boyfriends.”

“What?” Minho stopped in his tracks, “Why would he do that?”

With another shrug, Newt continued walking, not really wanting to explain to Minho what he’d already said to Brenda that morning. He still reckoned it was because he had freaked out Thomas… and it killed him inside. The pace of his walk increased subconsciously.

“Newt, please. What happened? Can I help?” Minho’s tone was soft, concern showing through.

“I’ll tell you later,” the blond finally responded, slowing down again as the other’s voice calmed him.

They continued to school in mostly silence until they got to the gates, and Minho made a reach for Newt’s hand, startling the blond until he realised he was just handing him a piece of paper.

“What’s this?” Newt asked, frowning quizzically at him.

“My number. In case you want to talk. I thought it was about time I gave it to you, pal.”

With another signature smirk, Minho saluted at Newt with two fingers and left Newt standing in front of the school gate dumbfounded. What was up with the jock lately? He shook his blond head and pushed the thought aside, entering the building only to find Thomas walking towards him with a wave.

Thomas greeted him with a smile and Newt looked around before returning his gaze to him. “Should you be looking so happy after we’ve just gone through a break up?”

“I suppose not.” The brunet clocked what his best friend was saying and made an over-the-top sad face.

A couple of girls walking past them in the hallway stopped and backed up, approaching the pair with distraught looks on their faces. “You two broke up?”

The blond looked at Thomas, waiting for him to say something and the brunet opened his mouth slowly, only to say unconvincingly, “Yeah, we, uh, thought it was best – but we’re still best friends.”

“But we loved you guys! And you two love each other!” The shorter blonde girl whined.

Newt wanted to correct her and tell her that their love was pretty much one sided, but he stayed silent.

“Hey, I still love him all the same.” Thomas nodded, wrapping an arm around Newt’s shoulders so the blond tensed up slightly.

“Then we don’t understand!” The girls complained, worrying Newt how much they cared about their relationship.

“We just thought friendship suited us better,” The brunet reiterated, turning to look his best friend in the eyes, “right, Newt?”

Newt wanted to slide down the locker at that moment, hug his legs and just rock back and forth. He didn’t, but he refused to look at Thomas. “Yeah, I guess.”

With a sad sigh, the girls shuffled off to their first class and Thomas nodded, a few head tilts to the side. “That wasn’t too bad.”

“Now all the school will know that we broke up. Perfect.” Newt put on a forced grin, but his voice obviously didn’t match his fake enthusiasm.

“What’s wrong with that?”

The blond opened his locker and grabbed the stuff he needed for first and second period. “It was just a weird time to break up. Especially after the threesome rumour.”

God, Newt thought, I hope Brenda spreads the truth sooner rather than later.

“Oh, shit. That’s right.” Thomas realised and slammed his palm onto his forehead. “What should we do?”

“Deny whatever people are saying about that night,” Newt nodded, closing the locker with a slam. “Minho knows the truth. He’ll tell everyone.”

“Minho what?” The brunet gaped at Newt as the blond started for his next class, following him. “Minho knew? All this time?”

“Well, no… I told him about the threesome not happening. He still believed the rest.” Newt rubbed his lips together, twisting the truth.

“Oh, well, that’s great then.” With a nod, Thomas sighed and clapped Newt on the back. “Do you think we should keep hugging or holding hands in front of people?”

Newt stilled a little. This was his moment to scream yes yes _yes_. But he reconsidered.

“You said things should go back to the way they were,” Newt’s heart sunk, “so let’s do just that, yeah? Which means none of the stuff that came with this whole gig.”

Newt should’ve just taken Thomas’ face in his hands then and there and kissed the breath out of him. But he couldn’t, and he wouldn’t. No matter how much he wished he were, Newt wasn’t that kind of guy. The threesome stint where he leaned in for more was a one off.

Besides, if they were to kiss again, Newt wanted Thomas to feel the same way as he did. To feel the cliché butterflies in his stomach whenever their mouths opened and closed around each other. To feel the heart-racing sensation if their tongues touched and fingers searched for more. Newt was like that. He wanted equilibrium.

Snapping back to reality, Newt spotted Thomas down the hall where he was headed for first lesson.

“Hey! Tommy!” Newt called out just in time before the brunet disappeared into the classroom. The boy’s head craned as he came to a stop. “Come to mind later to help me write my best man speech, will ya?”

“Oh, shit! I almost forgot that the wedding was that close!” Thomas called back, throwing his arms open. “Sure thing!”

With a smile, Newt cleared his throat and watched as Thomas entered the classroom after shouting, “Uh, great! See you!”

Newt quickly decided to head for the bathroom before class to wash his face, and then headed to social studies all excited about Thomas helping him.

 

* * *

 

 

They met up during lunch and school passed by fairly quickly. The bell rang and Newt got a couple of ‘sorry to hear about your break up’ comments from people he had spoken to once or twice in his life, before he waited outside of the school for Thomas. He was adamant not to leave him alone again after hours in case a certain sex goddess got her claws on him.

But to his dismay, Thomas walked out of the school with none other than Teresa on his side. They looked like they were talking about something serious, but when the brunet saw Newt, he waved and quickly bid farewell to the girl, leaving her behind. Newt wanted to smirk but he held it in.

“What were you two talking about?” Newt asked as they walked off campus. “Did you bring your car?”

With a nod, Thomas led the boy to his family car and the pair slid in, only to have Newt ask the question again, and ask if he knew why she started the rumour.

“Desperate bitch, apparently.” Thomas scoffed, and Newt was sure that at this point Thomas would at least start to dislike the girl. “But whatever, she’s hot.”

“ _Really?_ ” Newt accidentally replied, his distaste very vocal.

Thomas looked at him before turning towards the road again as he drove. “Well, yeah… I mean her attitude makes her less hot for sure, but she’s still sexy as hell.”

They drove for a while longer before Thomas parked up at the Isaac household and they both hopped out. Newt gritted his teeth and slammed the car door a little harder than he meant to.

“You okay there?” Thomas raised his eyebrows.

“Peachy,” Newt forced a smile as he opened his door and made Thomas follow him up to his room the normal _human_ way, throwing their bags in a heap on his bed.

He closed to door before making his way over to his dresser, where Steve had placed a book named ‘How to Make an Awesome Speech’, and Newt picked it up. The name made Thomas laugh, “Seriously?”

With a roll of his eyes, the blond sat on the edge of his bed. “It’s not like you’re the master of speeches, Tommy. I need all the help I can get.”

Thomas held his hands up as to signal defeat and flopped onto his stomach atop of the bed. Newt sat still and flicked through the chapters until he reached one about weddings, placing it open between both of them.

“So,” Newt started, eyes scanning the page full of colourful cartoon characters getting married, “How do you start a wedding speech?”

There was definitely a strange nervousness in his voice. If speaking in front of the whole school for homecoming was one thing, a wedding speech was something else; something far more important. Despite their recent conflicts, he wanted to make his mother happy, and most of all proud of him on what should be the second happiest day of her life. Newt didn’t want another disastrous marriage like the one she had to his father, but he knew Steve was different and kind and not selfish. That made it all the more personal.

Thomas puffed out his cheeks in a huff of breath and tapped the bed with his fingers. “Open by saying something funny or insightful – or start with a famous quote that most people will know. That’s always a good way to win the attention of a crowd.”

The blond scanned the room for inspiration and his eyes fell upon the little poster he had on the back of his bedroom door, reading the quote from it.

“How about ‘imagination is more important than knowledge’ for a starting line?”

With that Thomas scoffed and shook his head, looking at Newt with a gaze that made the blond shaky. Newt shook his head and sighed, shrugging.

“It could work if your mother were getting married to her imaginary friend from fifth grade,” the brunet joked, earning him a weak elbow in his side. “Put it down anyway, every little helps.”

Pen to paper, Newt jotted down the quote, but kept hearing his best friend laugh by his side. Newt turned and shoved Thomas playfully so the brunet rolled onto his back. “Shut up, stop teasing me! I can link it in.”

Thomas laughed so hard that his whole chest heaved, and incidentally caused the blond to snigger along with him. But he whined through the chuckles, “Seriously, stop making fun of me. You’re taking the mick!”

A hand reached up and Newt swallowed as Thomas ruffled his shaggy blond hair. “’You’re taking the mick!’” Thomas shook his head with a smile, his tone mimicking until he finished, “that’s cute, Newt.”

The Brit struggled to fight the blush dashing across his cheeks.

Eventually they got on with the speech, but the pair only made it halfway before they were sprawled on the floor, each with a slice of pizza in their hand.

“Reab me bah wha you goh so fah,” Thomas spluttered over a mouthful of pizza, gesturing with his freehand as Newt giggled at him.

“Please swallow first, you’re disgusting. Were you never taught any manners?” The brunet shook his head with a grin at his friend’s words, and once the blond threw him a tissue to get cleaned up, he cleared his throat.

“Okay. So, today we gather in a special place to celebr-!”

“Dude,” Thomas stopped him, “that’s horrible. And totally cliché.”

Throwing his pen down, the blond groaned. “I am so bad at this!”

“Hey, don’t give up,” Thomas spoke, reaching for the last bit of pizza, but then he picked up the plate instead and offered it to Newt, “just speak from your heart. You’re good at that.”

Newt shook his head at the pizza, and he could tell the brunet was pleased as he scooped up the slice and stuffed it into his mouth. But he appreciated the gesture all the same; it was a rarity that Thomas ever offered the last slice of anything to anyone, let alone pizza to Newt.

He watched his friend chew and swallow with a big smile, and at this moment Newt couldn’t help but wonder: did Thomas’ heart beat faster at the sight of him like his did?

“Let’s just start from scratch. Take this as a learning point.” Thomas took the paper from Newt’s hand and scrunched it up in a ball, chucking it to the side.

Thomas then took the reigns on writing the speech, the next few hours consisting of them writing non-stop and Newt stealing glances at Thomas when he wasn’t looking.

 

* * *

 

 

When the clock struck nine in the evening, the pen was thrown down and they both sat up slightly with a huff.

“Okay, so that’s done. Any re-jigs we can do in the next few days – but now you’ve gotta help me with my math homework, since your sessions with me inspired you to actually revise this part.” Thomas demanded, throwing his signature puppy-dog eyed smile that Newt could never resist.

With a roll of his eyes, Newt laid out on his front once more and the brunet followed, spreading his textbooks out in front of him in an arc. He fished out the worksheet and set it down by Newt, who looked at it in confusion at how blank it was.

“Tommy, don’t tell me that you haven’t even done one number? You're supposed to be the mathematician, remember?” The blond picked up the sheet and waved it about a little. “There are twenty-five questions and it’s due tomorrow – not to mention it’s already getting late.”

Looking at him sheepishly, Thomas sighed, “you know I’m awful at studying and this is the one thing I find difficult! Only geeks like you can do it.”

“Har har har,” Newt fake-laughed at the not-insult and shuffled closer to Thomas’ side, signalling for him to pick up the pen they’d used for the speech. Then he set to work on explaining the basics of quadratics and how he should go about breaking the question apart. The brunet struggled at first, but with a little help from his best friend – and apparent new tutor that was _totally_ ignoring the fact Thomas was sucking on the end of the pen, circling his tongue around the tip – he reached question eleven within half an hour, the material starting to click.

“There ya go, Tommy.” Newt smiled toothily.

Thomas shrugged, “what can I say? I’m a natural! Mr Mathematician hasn't lost his touch!"

Another nudge to his side, Newt scoffed at the boy’s play-arrogance and tutted to himself. “Well… aren’t you big headed?”

“And… you’re a good teacher.”

Newt fell silent and swallowed, turning away from Thomas’ warm gaze to look back at the books. He frowned at the pages a little, but he could feel the stare still fixated on him.

“What?” Newt finally turned back to see the boy still beaming at him, and his heart did a somersault in his chest.

“Nothing…” Thomas looked down at Newt’s… lips? The blond concealed a squeak as he felt the distance between them decreasing in size, the brunet leaning in. His breathing became ragged in disbelief and deep want.

Newt’s eyelids fell shut as he waited… eventually, the feeling of Thomas’ lips was against his own as he allowed himself to be kissed, and Newt kissed back slowly.

The angle was awkward as they lay on the floor, but Newt didn’t care one single bit as Thomas brought his hand up to cup Newt’s cheek, the skin cold against his warm face. Then he pushed the blond’s shoulder ever so lightly so that the blond was on his back, and half of the brunet’s body was hovering over Newt’s, the kiss never breaking.

As Newt let himself lie back on the carpet, he felt total bliss taking over the confusion of the kiss. Thomas pressed down on Newt’s lips hard, thumb trailing delicately over the blond’s cheek as if he were tracing out all the details in his skin. The blond brought his hand up to place over Thomas’ as his heart raced and the latter’s hand began to move lower. First to Newt’s neck, then trailed firmly to Newt’s shoulders, constantly moving down towards his chest.

What came next was completely foreign and unexpected by Newt, causing so many unknown feelings and emotions to erupt in his body in places he didn’t even know existed. This happened when Thomas dragged his mouth from the blond’s wet red lips down his jawline, to his chin until his lips landed on the Adams Apple in Newt’s throat.

A noise he couldn’t quite call a moan, and couldn’t quite call a squeak caught in his throat as he let his head loll back. But he frowned at the sudden faintness of the kisses he was feeling in his aroused state. His fingers moved around, trying to feel for Thomas’ hand or face once the embraces were practically non-existent, but all he would hear was his name being repeated over and over and—

Newt opened his eyes and saw a hand waving in front of his face… as he lay on his front, Thomas by his side and realised he had daydreamed the whole event. It had been real Thomas that had been calling his name, waking him up from his sudden fantasy.

Cheeks burned a deep, hot red and Thomas gazed at Newt with worry in his eyes. “Newt? You okay there? You were making weird pained noises and I thought you were having a stomach-ache or something. You just zoned out.”

“Uh, sorry.” Newt cleared his throat, “Yeah, I was somewhere else entirely there.”

“Yeah,” Thomas frowned suspiciously, “whatever. Let’s just carry on – I have a few more to do.”

As the brunet went back to his work, Newt sat up to get himself more comfortable, but as he did he quickly pulled his knees up to his chest. The blond winced in slight pain. He was hard and Thomas was still here. Shit shit shit. He couldn’t just go to the bathroom and relieve himself.

“Are you sure you’re okay, man? You’re really fidgety.”

“Y-yeah,” Newt stuttered and reached behind him onto the bed, grabbing a pillow to conveniently place over his crotch. “It’s just cold and the floor is uncomfortable.”

He pretended to quiver, making Thomas jump up to grab the blanket from the bed to wrap around Newt’s smaller, thinner body. “There, better?”

Biting his lip, Newt nodded and lied, “Yeah… much.”

“Awesome. I wanna finish this up quick so we can play a game of FIFA afterwards.”

Newt shook his head hurriedly, “You can’t, my mum will be back soon and you have to go.”

He used that as an excuse, though it was as good as anything as he was almost certain his mother would explode if she walked in on her son hard in his jeans and his best friend sat close beside him. But, as much as he would have loved for Thomas to stay despite that, he really really needed to do something about his predicament, which was getting more and more painful by the second.

“It’s really sad that your mom hates me now.” Thomas ruffled his hair sadly.

Newt pouted with an equally miserable expression, “she doesn’t actually hate you… she’s just confused and uneducated.”

“If that’s what you want to call it,” the brunet shrugged and Newt helped him quickly complete two more questions, admiring the curve of Thomas’ back as he leant over the book.

Then Thomas was done and he slammed the book shut triumphantly, wiping his hands together as he stood, “Well, that was fucking easy. And damn, my chest hurts.”

The blond wished it hurt from the secret longing his best friend had for him, but he shook his head and sighed, “That’s because it _is_ easy, and you were sprawled on the floor for way too long for it not to hurt.”

A groan escaped the brunet’s lips as Thomas stretched and loosened his tense muscles. Newt sat, wrinkling up his face as he tried to not react further to the noise that filled his ears, making his lower region twitch.

Seeing Newt still glued to the floor, the boy raised an eyebrow. “Are you gonna walk me down or can I use the proper exit for this house?”

The blond’s head snapped up and he rubbed the back of his neck, “go ahead and use the window. I, uh, have pins and needles in my foot and I don’t think I can stand for a few minutes.”

After collecting his books up and stuffing them all back into his bag, Thomas ruffled Newt’s hair once more from above and headed towards the window, ducking under the slider as he waved and disappeared into the night. Newt let out a huge sigh, letting his head hit the back of the bed.

“Bloody hell,” he muttered under his breath.

When he was sure he heard the thud and groan of Thomas as he jumped from the rooftop, Newt scrambled up, chucking the pillow aside as he darted for the bathroom. He slammed the door with his back and made sure to lock the other connecting entrance before he began to unbuckle his jeans in a frenzy.

His mind travelled back to his daydream. How could he have done that when he was still there with Thomas at his side? The kiss and Thomas’ touch on his skin had felt so real, too real that Newt was sure he could even feel the fake hotness of the brunet’s breath on his neck as he trailed kisses there softly.

With a groan of his own, the blond rapidly turned on the shower and stripped out of his remaining clothes. As soon as he stepped under the rain of water he observed the situation. Newt cursed at himself and bit his lip as he gradually curled his hand around his length.

The up and down movement he made with his hand was slow at first, but the memories of him and Thomas kissing both in the dream and real life flooded his memory. He pictures the way the brunet looked at him when he undressed himself in front of Thomas and Teresa, and that made him stroke that tad faster.

Shaking the image of Teresa from his head, Newt imagined what it would’ve been like to have Thomas there and then by himself.

He still wasn’t entirely sure how to do _it_. He spent very little of his early teenage years watching dirty films, but mostly hid behind said brunet whenever the main male and female began to engage intimately. And it was always straight couples, his experience was completely lacking in his department.

But, Newt just knew that if they had ended up going for it, Thomas would initially take control – the thought of this made Newt whimper – before the blond found his stride and reciprocated the actions.

The mix of the hot water on his skin and hand stroking his cock in fast movements made Newt feel euphoric, trapped in his happy place where Thomas’ hands were all over him, and his all over Thomas. Newt moaned at the thought of seeing Thomas, perfect, muscled, confident Thomas, naked on a bed, completely coming undone.

That night at the threesome, he was so close to seeing Thomas in all his glory. He had already made up his mind to stay there, not making an excuse to leave like Thomas had asked Newt to do. No.

Newt jerked continually faster at the thought of them alone in the house, on the bed, bare and tangled together, their moans the only thing audible. He imagined them naked, kissing every inch of each other’s bodies as they messed the bed sheets. Newt gasped and groaned, thankful for the noise of the water that covered his desperate whimpering.

He leant against the wet wall tiling and slid down to the floor, picturing Thomas in between his legs, teasing and kissing all the way up from his thigh before taking Newt in his mouth. Thomas always had a habit of bobbing his head back and forth when working, and the incident with the pen and his tongue earlier helped Newt imagine easier.

Throwing his head back, he continued to sit under the stream of water, images of him gripping the brunet’s hair as his tongue pleased him filling his mind, hand getting slicker with the help of the water and pre-come that was seeping out.

With one final scenario of Thomas taking him there in the shower, Newt came with a jolt all over his hand. “ _Tommy…_ ”

The water washed all of his mess away quickly, leaving Newt feeling weak in the knees as he slowly regained his standing position and turned off the shower. He swallowed and grabbed a towel before returning to his room.

His alarm shone green with the time: twelve-past-ten. The blond was completely and utterly knackered, exhausted and shattered, clambering groggily into his bed without putting on a pair of boxers. He slipped under the duvet and snuggled down into the sheets.

Newt fell asleep thinking about how on earth he would face Thomas the next day after what he had just done.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm almost certain this will be the last or one of the last chapters i (tarantism) post before exams start on may 11th through to june 2nd, so be warned that there may be a large hiatus for this fic through that time. But if you're lucky I may find time to squeeze one more chapter in next week (but I doubt it), so I hope this one suffices.
> 
> this chapter is definitely where the higher rating starts to kick in and i'm sorry to everyone that thought the daydream sequence was a real kiss between the duo :-) that was like a huge slap in the face and none of you deserve that.
> 
> well, this is very un-beta'd so there are gonna be a bunch of mistakes i'm sure, but i hope you enjoy it all the same! -- a slightly longer chapter this time that involves brenda, minho, thomas and sad handjobs! yay! thank you so much for reading this silly au!
> 
> comments are much appreciated (i write too much here aaaagh!) :-)
> 
> tarantism
> 
> EDIT 29th April - i just realised the fact thomas being bad at maths isnt correct so I rejigged the dialogue to fit his early characterisation. Hopefully it's got better continuity now ugh


	13. thirteen

What felt like an earthquake rousing him from his slumber the next morning actually turned out to be Brenda, hands firmly shaking him over the covers.

“Get up! We need to look for our wedding clothes!” She whined, causing Newt to groan into his pillow and pull the covers up over his head more so his bare lower half was mostly in clear view.

“Five more minutes…”

“No, get up now—oh my god, are you naked?” The brunette scrunched her face up, grabbing a stray pillow to throw over his waist as Newt winced and rolled over.

“Brenda, please. We have a week until the wedding. It’s Thursday, there’s still plenty of time after school…”

“No, get your ass out of bed! Mom says we’re going out soon and besides, the more time we take the better I’ll look! And you get to miss school! Come on.” Brenda pleaded, and just as Newt went to groan one final time there was a knock on the bedroom door.

The almost stepsiblings craned their heads in synchronisation to see Steve standing in the doorway, confirming to them both that they were to leave shortly as he had already rung up the school, telling them that the family had dentist appointments that morning and so would be late for classes.

Despite his annoyance of the intrusion into his room, Newt was secretly glad he was missing part of school that day – he felt slightly guilty for not seeing Thomas, but he remembered how embarrassed he would be is he did see his best friend after the prior night’s incident.

Brenda retreated from Newt’s bedroom to allow him to put on some clothes, closing the door on the way out. He was thankful for the privacy as he rolled off the bed, rubbed his eyes and pulled out a pair of washed-out jeans alongside a red jumper.

Trundling downstairs, the whole almost family was waiting on the blond. As Newt made the ground floor, his mother grinned at him and placed a hairpin into her locks.

“Don’t you look handsome, Newt!” Anne gushed, clearly excited to try on her perfect dress – the last detail of the fairy-tale wedding she always dreamed of. “Now, let’s go! I can’t wait to try on some dresses!”

 

* * *

 

 

The almost family set out in their car, Brenda and Newt riding in the back whilst Anne drove and Steve sat beside her in the passenger seat, staring out at all the sights they passed on their way to the mall and bridal department stores.

Remembering he had science today, Newt removed his phone from his pocket to text both Thomas and Minho that he wouldn’t be in school or class that day. To his surprise, a mere minute later he received a reply from the jock.

 

**Minho: aw :// why?**

 

**Newt: family dragged me out last minute shopping 4 wedding on sat :/**

**Newt: but im “at the dentist” if anyone asks**

 

The blond stared at the message screen for Thomas and still no new message came, instead a new response from Minho appeared.

**Minho: you gonna take me as ur date? ;)**

 

Without realising, Newt chuckled at the ridiculous joke, crinkles appearing in the corners of his eyes. It only occurred to him that he was laughing when Brenda asked, “What are you all giggly about? Did you get back together with Thomas?”

Newt looked up at Brenda but saw Anne peer at him in the rear-view mirror as he did. He swallowed and felt his throat constricting.

“You broke up? See, what did I tell you? Everyone goes through a phase.”

“Whatever,” Newt grumbled, not wanting to tell his mother that he was still into guys – more specifically Thomas, and it wasn’t a phase to him. But he didn’t want to ruin the day when his mum was so happy.

Instead, Newt turned back to his cell phone and began tapping away at the keyboard on screen to reply to the raven-haired boy.

**Newt: maybe. Since my bf dumped me…**

 

“So… should we take Thomas off the guest list?” Anne added as another text flashed onto screen.

 

**Minho: hey! i will not be ur rebound**

 

“No! God, no – he’s still my best friend, mum.” Newt stated, and wanted to add ‘and my soulmate that I am completely and utterly in love with’.

“That means the guest list is full and you won’t be able to take anyone else. You certain?”

With a nod, Newt chewed on his lip and the car pulled over. Steve announced that they’d arrived and how great the drive had been before he, Anne and Brenda all clambered out of the vehicle. The blond quickly tapped his phone with a pout on his lips.

**Newt: just checked w mum. guest list is full :( sorry**

 

He almost felt bad for sort-of leading Minho on in a joking way, but he knew the Asian could take the harmless two-and-fro of the conversation.

**Minho: that’s ok. you realise i was joking right? have fun xx**

 

With a final text of the grin-face emoji from both of them, Newt slipped his phone back into his pocket and exited the car so his mother could lock it. He then proceeded to follow the adults into the familiar store that he had brought his homecoming suit in. This caused him so shake his head and chuckle lightly.

Newt admired the suits on their racks as Brenda flittered around trying to look for the perfect maid of honour dress. His mother had already gone off to look at wedding dresses in the back with a shop assistant, Beth, leaving him and Steve to stare mindlessly at the clothes surrounding them. Newt had insisted he would happily wear his homecoming suit, but was hushed by Anne as she explained that blue wasn’t traditional and she wanted him to look just perfect.

“Newt! Come look at my dress!” A squawking sound emerged from the changing rooms and the blond shook his head from his daze, not realising how long he’d just been standing in one spot staring at the same suit for the past few minutes.

He approached the changing room and grumbled that he was there as he took a seat, before Brenda sauntered out in a long baby-pink dress. She shrugged, prompting an opinion.

“Uh, yeah, it’s nice I suppose?” Newt rubbed the back of his neck, never expecting to see his almost stepsister in anything so bright and pink.

With a groan, Brenda turned to the mirror and stuck out her tongue, “No, I look disgusting. This color is definitely not me.”

“You don’t look disgusting though. It’s a nice dress, just maybe get it in a different colour – it looks beautiful. You look beautiful.” He nodded and the brunette turned to see the sincerity in his eyes.

Sighing, Brenda sat next to him and surprisingly leant a little against his shoulder. “Why do we hate each other so much?”

Newt shrugged, “we’re going to be siblings – isn’t that the rule: siblings hate each other?”

Brenda hummed, “I guess.”

Tucking a strand of her hair behind her ear affectionately, the blond sighed and admitted honestly, “I really like you, you know – despite all our differences. I just wish we had more time to bond.”

With a scrunch of her nose, Brenda sat back up straight and shook her head, hair cascading over her shoulders and down her back.

“Don’t get all sappy on me.” However, when the brunette looked at Newt she smiled, “Go get your suit.”

Newt scoffed and nudged his almost stepsister before he stood, reiterated that she should try the dress in a mint colour if they had it, and left the changing room to see a shop employee.

He spotted Steve getting measured by a moderately short man whose nametag read ‘Lawrence’, and he jumped a little when he heard footsteps beside him. The blond turned and looked up at the employee once he heard him speak: “You look familiar, muchacho.”

Recalling the man that helped him get fitted for his homecoming suit, Newt smiled. “Hey, yes – you helped me find a homecoming suit and gave me money off?”

“Ah! Yes! I remember now.” Jorge exclaimed with a wide smile and a stroke of his facial hair, “So, how was that homecoming? Did you two win? How is that boyfriend of yours?”

Newt sighed; he didn’t want to explain this again. “Yeah, we won… and we broke up.”

Jorge’s face turned to one of genuine surprise, “No… I’m sorry about that. Was it because of that girl that was here?”

The memory of the day re-entered his mind and the image of Thomas kissing Teresa’s neck in the changing room brought a sick feeling to his stomach.

“Yes, actually. But it’s not like he dumped me or anything,” Newt informed him as Jorge began to measure his height, “we just decided that it was better if we just stay friends.”

A sudden realisation came over him – why was he telling this to a man he hardly knew? He concluded that he just needed to speak to anyone, even if it wasn’t the whole truth.

With a nod, Jorge motioned for Newt to follow him to the fitting rooms, grabbing a few suits along the way.

“He looked at you with such adoration, you know?” Jorge commented as he lay the suits down and continued to measure Newt in the changing rooms. “Despite that other girl being there, he still couldn’t take his eyes off you.”

Newt closed his eyes, suppressing another sigh. “I wish you hadn’t have said that.”

“Oh, my apologies, sir. Too personal?”

Biting the inside of his cheek, the blond mumbled, “something like that…”

“I take it you didn’t want to go back to being just friends?” The Hispanic man queried as he tilted Newt’s chin up and pulled his arms out to measure his wingspan.

“Not at all – I want to be more. So much more.”

With a tut, Jorge tried his best reassuring grin. “Get him back then!”

A pained chuckle escaped the blond’s lips as the shop manager disappeared to grab a few final pieces for the perfect suit. “If only it were that easy.”

Newt forced a smile on his face as Jorge reappeared, but he winced sadly as he was handed a suit piece and shirt to try on. He stepped into a cubicle and pulled the curtain across, stripping to his underwear before sliding into the smooth clothing. As he buttoned up the shirt and slipped on the suit jacket, he tore the curtain across and stepped out in the perfectly fitting black outfit.

“Well, aren’t you just the prettiest thing I did ever lay eyes on!” Jorge sang, clapping to himself as Newt peered into the mirror. “That boy is a damned idiot for letting you go.”

A faint blush crept onto Newt’s cheeks and he couldn’t hold back the smile. “You’re very flattering – is this why your store always has so many customers? I think you’re the reason they keep coming back.”

His comment earned a laugh from the store manager as he stood back and scanned to see if any final adjustments needed to be made. “I was only stating the truth, muchacho. And by the looks of things, this was an easy job – everything seems fine and if it feels good to you, you’re free to go change and bring it to the counter.”

Thanking the man, Newt politely shook his hand before grabbing his things – still in his suit – to go and see how his mother was doing. He entered the other changing room to see Steve suited up outside in a fancy black suit (unable to enter the room to see his mother’s dress via her instruction) and inside, Brenda fitted in a different dress that was a mint green and much more flattering and gorgeous on her.

Grumbles and different noises of the struggle of fitting into the dress she had pre-ordered to the store sounded from her cubicle. Yet, after a minute or two of final lacing, the employee, Beth exited the room with a big smile on her face.

“You guys ready to see her?”

Brenda and Newt nodded before the red curtain was drawn back to reveal his mother in her wedding dress. The sight caused Newt to gasp softly, eyes flittering over the sight of his mother in such a beautiful dress.

“Mum,” Newt breathed, “you look… unbelievable.”

Anne smiled widely as she exited the cubicle fully and twirled around, the long lacy dress fitting her thin form perfectly, dainty butterflies lining the embroidery. She wore a subtle headpiece in her tied back hair that added even more elegance, enough for her to look like royalty.

“You really think so, Newtie?”

“Yeah, of course I think so.”

A few hugs later between Anne and her family, she realised she didn’t care much for ‘bad luck’, calling Steve in to take a look at her, and the man appeared almost instantaneously with wide eyes and a look of awe. He failed to say anything as he approached her, and Newt watched as he swooped in to kiss his mother, the blond making out a faint ‘I love you’ to her as they gazed at each other.

Brenda scooted closer to him, as the couple embraced and giggled like a bunch of giddy children. “She looks beautiful.”

Nodding, Newt found himself still beaming. “I know.”

His smile continued as he watched Steve and his mother whisper and gaze at each other in between kisses and laughs. They made love look so easy.

After they all changed out of their outfits – all of which Anne was very pleased with – they paid for them, Newt bid Jorge farewell and they all decided to go out and eat in the mall since none of them had ingested any food that morning.

They had lunch at a quaint café on the top floor of the mall before heading back to the car, purchases safely in clothing bags in the trunk. They all slid in and as Steve started the car (it was his turn to drive), he announced that he would be dropping both Brenda and Newt at school once they had grabbed their stuff from the house.

The pair groaned but agreed as the car started and they drove off, Anne pulling out her tablet to go through the final list for the wedding.

“So, Brenda you’re still taking Aris to the wedding?” She asked, turning around to ask from her seat and the brunette grinned, nodding in happiness.

When Newt was asked if he really wanted Thomas still there, he frowned. “Yeah, he’s still my invited guest.”

“Won’t it be awkward, since you broke up and all?” Anne cocked her head to the side.

“We just decided to be friends, thought it was better. So no, no awkwardness.”

With a hum and an ‘okay honey, whatever you say’, the journey continued until Steve pulled up outside their house and explained how he expected the pair back at the car within five minutes, so they could get to the school promptly.

Newt and Brenda sprinted inside to grab the necessary books and bag they needed before they were on their way to school again, and waving Steve goodbye at the gate.

The bell for end of break sounded and they merged in with the crowd that was flooding back to classes, carrying on their day as usual before Newt took a seat in his biology class.

Without much hesitation upon his arrival, he heard Thomas slip into the seat beside him. “Newt! Hey, I thought you weren’t coming in today. What happened?”

“Wedding shopping.” Newt whispered, not making eye contact with his best friend to the right as he tapped his pencil on the table.

“Did you get your suit?” The brunet asked and received a nod from the blond. “Should’ve brought me with you, man. I bet you look great, but I want to look super fancy too – that is if I’m still your plus-one for the wedding?”

Slowly nodding, Newt thought to himself ‘you’d look good and fancy and perfect even in a hoodie and jeans’, but replied, “Just wear anything smart – even your homecoming suit will do.”

Thomas scoffed, “Okay, man. I’ll let you out-dress me just this once. Since it’s your special day and all.”

“You make it sound like I’m the one getting married.” The blond couldn’t help but chuckle before he attempted to pay attention to his teacher, even as Thomas tapped his fingers repeatedly on Newt’s back. He struggled to ignore Thomas being a nuisance, but eventually found himself leaning on his hand, watching the brunet when Thomas finally got stuck into the work and pulled cute faces as he read the textbook.

The person next to Newt must’ve noticed quickly, because as Thomas excused himself to go to the toilet, a boy named Clint nudged him. The blond turned to him and raised his eyebrows.

“Are you two still broken up or are you together again?”

Newt bit his lip, “We’re not together. Why do you ask?”

With a shrug, the boy shook his head and returned to his work, “You two just still look like a couple to me.”

The blond’s mouth twitched into a smile, but his eyes grew sad. “Yeah, no, Just friends…”

“That’s a shame. You guys were cute.” Clint declared without looking up, causing Newt to slump lower in his seat until the brunet re-emerged and asked whether he was alright.

With another raise of his eyebrows, Newt forced a smile. “Yeah, I’m fantastic.”

“You stressing about the speech for Saturday?”

Not really, he wanted to answer, but then he realised he would have to tell Thomas the real reason. So, he sighed, “That’s exactly it.”

Thomas rested his head on his hand like Newt had done earlier and smiled, dimple appearing on his cheek. “You’ll do great – and remember, I’ll be there in the crowd, so just look for me if you get nervous, okay?”

Newt’s heart warmed at his words, feeling happier at what his best friend said. He smiled, “you better be, Tommy.”

“Hey, what are best friends for?” The brunet winked at Newt and carried on with his work as the blond’s heart somersaulted in his chest.

Was Thomas seriously that oblivious? Had he never seen Newt blush when he said that kind of thing? Did he not experience the flustered state Newt got into when his words made his heart swell? He sighed silently – he believed he still had a way to go before he was to win Thomas’ heart, but he was willing and ready to fight.

 

* * *

 

 

When the bell rang at the end of the day, Thomas managed to get Newt to agree to go grab a bite to eat with him in celebration of everything coming up rosy, despite the sadness of the student body and especially Newt.

The pair decided to eat at one of their favourite diners, one they hadn’t visited in a while. Once they arrived, the owner of the “Homestead” diner greeted them with a wise smile and open arms.

“What’s up, guys!” Frypan, the manager, called out and exchanged a quick hug with them both, placing a hand on their shoulders. “What can I get you fellas?”

“I’ll have anything this guy orders.” Thomas stated, wrapping an arm around the blond with a smile.

Newt rolled his eyes and shook his head at their friend, “Just the usual please, Fry.”

Taking their usual booth by the back window, they slid into the seats and Frypan returned to the kitchen as Thomas rubbed his hands together in excitement.

“What are you buzzing about?” Newt smirked, and he couldn’t help thinking how this very much resembled a date.

“I’m just excited – we haven’t eaten at Fry’s in forever. I can’t wait to get that burger.”

The blond couldn’t help but chuckle at the brunet’s child-like behaviour.

Swiftly, Frypan returned with two plates of burgers and fries, obviously ordering for their meals to be pushed up the line so they were made faster – just one of the perks of being friends with the manager of a huge restaurant.

Thomas grabbed a plate immediately and Newt scoffed. “Patience, Tommy!”

Whining like a puppy, Thomas pouted and then his face transformed into a huge grin as he picked up the burger and stuffed it into his mouth, taking a huge bite.

“You’re gross, Tommy. You look like a baby struggling to eat!” Newt laughed, picking up a few fries as Fry pulled up a stool at their table.

“So? How are my two favorite customers? What’s been happening?”

Still with a large mouthful of food, Thomas replied, “N’mush Fry. We’re celebra’ing New’s complee speech for hish mom’s wehing!”

Frypan gave the boy a funny look, eyebrow raised. “Boy, you need to swallow your mouthful before you speak.”

Thomas shrugged and sniggered as Newt shook his head. “He said we’re celebrating my complete speech for my mum’s wedding.”

“You understood that?”

Newt nodded and placed a fry in his mouth, Frypan staring at him in awe at how in sync the pair of them were – as if they could read each other’s minds.

“Well, if it’s a celebration then it calls for a Froyo – on the house. I’ll be right back.” The larger boy said as he stood and pointed at them, smiling as he returned to the kitchen.

Finally swallowing his mouthful, Thomas expressed his love for Frypan and picked at the fried potatoes on their plate. It wasn’t long before the brunet was almost finished with his food – he’d always been a fast eater, especially when the food was as good as it was at the Homestead restaurant. Shortly after, Frypan returned with a medium tub of frozen yoghurt and the pair thanked him before he went back to work, promising to see them again soon.

As Newt made his way through his burger, he observed that there was only one pot of Froyo and two spoons. Great. More couple-like things he was being forced into. Deep down, he didn’t detest the idea at all.

He pushed his plate aside when only a few chips and part of an empty burger bap were left, so he could pick up a spoon and start on the desert. However, Newt got rather distracted as he watched Thomas scoop up the treat and place it in his mouth, pulling the spoon out with closed eyes and lips, causing Newt to feel butterflies in his stomach and a light tightening in his lower region.

Before he knew it, Thomas was offering his own spoonful to Newt, exclaiming how food it was. Although he had his own spoon, Thomas insisted he tasted his half and Newt couldn’t refuse his puppy dog eyes, closing his mouth around the spoon.

Grinning toothily, Thomas pulled the plastic item away and nodded. “Good, right?”

Newt nodded, swallowing as he thought to himself ‘I could’ve figured that out with my own spoon, you dummy’.

The brunet pushed the bowl more evenly between them so they could both dig into the treat, Thomas chuckling as Newt ate messily.

“Now who’s the baby?” Thomas raised an eyebrow, creases in the corner of his eyes visible with his happiness. He leant forward and wiped the ice cream that was collecting at the corner of the blond’s mouth, much like he’d done with the moustache they’d drawn when studying.

Newt felt his breath catch and he struggled to speak. “U-uh, thanks.”

Unexpectedly and completely ridiculously, Thomas retracted the thumb he used to remove the ice cream from around his lips and placed it in his mouth. Newt sat frozen at a mixture of how bizarre, gross and arousing that was all at the same time. His throat made an involuntary low moan at the sight that Newt tried to mask with a cough.

Luckily, Thomas was too focused on finishing up the desert to focus on Newt’s noise, and the blond let his best friend clean the bowl, as he was no longer feeling hungry after that sudden happening. Newt thought, he must’ve done something terrible in a past life to deserve the kind of torture that was being in an unrequited love with your best friend.

Thomas grabbed a napkin from the dispenser once he was finished and Newt shuffled in his seat. “Man, I missed Fry’s food!”

Newt nodded, agreeing with him as an unknown waiter came over to give them the bill and collect their split payment. This gave them a cue to leave, walking towards the exit where Frypan was welcoming new customers and assigning them to different tables or booths.

He spotted the duo and made an extravagant hand gesture. “You two gotta visit here more often, all right? One drop in every seven months ain’t good enough, boys! Hope you enjoyed the food!”

Farewells were said quickly so no customers were held up, and both Newt and Thomas exited the Homestead to be on their way back home. They started down the street, the amazing smell of freshly cooked burgers wafting from the open doors of the restaurant.

“You excited for your mom to be married again?” Thomas started up the conversation once again, “she seems a lot happier now she’s with Steve. He’s really great.”

“Yeah. I mean, there are days where I find myself missing my dad, but then I remember how sad she was with him and Steve has brought her back the happiness she deserves, so, yeah – I couldn’t be happier for her.”

Thomas bumped his hip against Newt’s, causing the blond to fall slightly to the side with a smile spreading across his face. He began to laugh loudly as the brunet crouched down and lifted Newt up into a piggy-back.

“Dude! You’re heavy! What happened to the guy I was lifting before?”

Newt slapped his best friend’s arm playfully, “shut up and take me home! I just had a whole burger, fries and part of a frozen yoghurt so you can’t speak about my weight right now!”

For a moment he even forgot about his ever-growing feelings for Thomas and began to just enjoy himself and have fun, instructing the brunet to go faster. The way in which that sentence sounded sexual made Newt blush and Thomas just laughed, managing to pick up the pace for the rest of the journey until he reached Newt’s house.

“Your steed has arrived at its final destination, sir!” He announced, letting Newt slide off Thomas’ body with a thump on the ground.

“Thanks, Tommy.”

With a stretch of his entire body, Thomas nodded and flexed his arms. “Isn’t my strength amazing?”

With a scoff, Newt laughed at his ridiculousness, but wanted to agree that it was amazing.

Lingering in his doorway, Newt bit his lip and swung his arms at his side. He watched as Thomas caught his breath and ran a hand through his perfectly tousled hair.

“So, uh, I’ll see you later?”

Thomas nodded, “You can count on that, partner!”

Newt opened the door with his keys and as he turned to shut it and wave, Thomas blew an over-exaggerated kiss towards the blond before turning on his heals to leave. The door shut abruptly after and Newt found himself swooning to the floor with a heavy sigh and a smile.

Hands running over his face and through his hair in disbelief, he stood slowly to go upstairs to do homework, so many emotions and thoughts running through his head. Thoughts of the wedding and the speech and Thomas clouded his mind, not enabling him to focus on his schoolwork. Newt knew it was pointless in trying to do anything, so he curled up in his covers and imagined him and Thomas on a real restaurant date in a small booth, sharing a milkshake until the daydream eventually sent him into a peaceful sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't believe I was crazy enough to write this right in the middle of exams when I'm already so stressed but I felt like I owed another chapter and here it is!  
> A lot of extra stuff in terms of Newt's family in this one - yay bonding! but theres a good lot of newtmas in there too.  
> The wedding is going to be a good one guys - super big and important so stick around for that.  
> Don't get your hopes up for another update until after June 2nd guys when I'm done with exams (finally ugh im dying) but I hope this chapter is okay for you all. Tons of mistakes i'm sure because I don't have time to check them but I hope it's enjoyable all the same!  
> Thank you so much for reading and make sure to comment :-)
> 
> tarantism (rosie)


	14. fourteen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WOOOOPPP another update! its been so so so so long since i last wrote a chapter, but im here now :) if you havent realized, there are two authors running this fic. and ive been MIA for like, months, and im SO sorry for that.
> 
> anyway, the other author (tarantism) is still doing her exams until june 2nd, so here i am taking over :DDDDDDDD
> 
> OKKKKK im just going to say that shit is goin down on this chapter - super important shit. THE MOST IMPORTANT CHAPTER SO FAR! enjoy :)
> 
> obliviate1d (ilsa)
> 
> 30th May - SLIGHT EDIT MADE to Thomas' final line but nothing too major

The next day passed by fairly quickly, and now, Newt found himself staring at his reflection in the mirror as he slipped his suit jacket on. His hair was gelled up neatly; Brenda had fixed it for him when she saw how messy his hair looked.

His mind was racing with thoughts. His mum was getting married _again_ today. He was happy for her, and for Steve, too. But there was still that _something_ nagging at the back of his mind sometimes. Like he couldn’t let Steve and Brenda in just yet. Newt decided that it was fair for him to think like that. How could he not when two complete strangers just started living with your family out of nowhere?

Newt remembered their first dinner together very vividly, where it seemed like only Steve and Anne were enjoying it. Because truth be told, Newt and Brenda weren’t used to it. But slowly, he made sure to accept the fact that their parents had found each other.

He and Brenda weren’t like this before high school. They hung out together on the first few weeks of high school—him, Brenda and Thomas—had lunch together, went home in the same car. That was until Aris had his eyes on Brenda. Well, let’s just say that really changed her. Dating one of the school’s jocks made her hang out with him and Thomas less, and eventually stopped altogether. Thomas only let Newt get upset over it for a week. (Bless him, really.)

And Thomas.

Newt let out a groan at the mention of his name on his mind.

Always Thomas.

That boy had been a big part of Newt’s life. When he first moved to America, Thomas was his first friend. Not like he had many, since almost everyone either hated him or Thomas. They made fun of Newt’s accent sometimes and no, Thomas didn’t do a good job of standing up for him.

Thomas wasn’t a hero, but he saved Newt in so, _so_ many ways.

He was there when Newt’s mum had her drinking problem, volunteered to stay the night to watch over him. He was there when Newt cried and cried over how he missed his dad so much. He was there when Newt got turned down by his crush—Thomas took him on a fake date later that day to make him feel better, how ironic—And of course, Thomas was there during all the happy moments too.

It was only natural for him to fall for Thomas, expected, even.

Newt’s phone vibrated on his nightstand, breaking his train of thoughts. And of course, Thomas’ name popped up, along with a picture of them, their cheeks pressed together.

“Hello?” Newt said, flopping down on the bed carefully.

“What time do I have to be at the wedding again?” Thomas asked over the line and Newt groaned, rolling his eyes.

“Two, reception’s at three-thirty.”

“Okay. I’m wearing my homecoming suit, would that be alright?” Newt shuddered at the thought of homecoming. _Thomas’ lips warm against his own; hands cupping Newt’s cheek almost too hesitantly_ —“Newt?”

“Uh,” Newt coughed, shaking the picture away. “Um, yeah. Just—just don’t be late, yeah?” Newt said as he hung up without waiting for Thomas’ answer. His mind needed to stop providing him with such imagination, really. Or that might result him having awkward boners in front of Thomas for the rest of his life.

Newt sighed, getting up to check up on the girls. Two of his mum’s friends from work were doing her hair, while Brenda did her make up. He walked over and gave his mum a side-hug, then kissed her on the forehead. “You look beautiful, mum.”

“Oh, sweetheart,” she cooed, putting a hand on Newt’s cheek. He could feel her nervousness despite her relaxed tone.

“I’m gonna wait downstairs, yeah?” Newt said, squeezing Anne’s shoulder lightly. He turned and went down the stairs, suddenly feeling emotional.

It was another hour before he heard the girls stop moving around on the upper floor, and Newt turned to the stairs to see Brenda walk down in a beautiful mint coloured dress. His mother followed after, and Newt’s breath was knocked out of his lungs.

Anne looked so beautiful.

“Oh,” Newt breathed. “Look at my family. You two look stunning.” He said earnestly. He kissed Anne’s forehead first, then moved to place a lingering kiss to Brenda’s cheek that earned a giggled in response.

He took pictures of them, before his mum’s friend offered to snap all three of them together. And after that, they set off.

 

* * *

 

When they arrived, Brenda went in first to stand with her dad. And since neither of Newt’s grandparents were alive, he was going to be the one walking his mother down the aisle.

“Newt,” His mother said next to him. When he turned his head, her eyes were glistening with tears, threatening to fall down. “Are you sure that you’re okay with this?”

The question startled him, but he smiled at her. “I’ve always known Steve was good for you ever since he made you sing in the shower again, mum.” He told her, leaning down to kiss her on her temple. “He’s not Dad, but I’m so glad that you two had found each other.”

This time, Anne let the tears flow out of her eyes while clutching onto Newt tightly. But as he put his arms around his mother, he felt his phone vibrating in his pocket.

“Hello?” Newt said into the cell, not bothering to see who it was.

“What time did you say the ceremony was starting again?” Newt groaned, letting go of his mother as the music began playing inside. Thomas cursed on the line. “Crap. It’s starting, isn’t it? Look, Newt. I’ll be there at the end of the ceremony and definitely for your speech. I’m just running a little late.”

He wasn’t even surprised at all that Thomas would show up late. “What am I going to do with you?” Newt sighed, mouthing ‘it’s Thomas’ to his mother when she asked whom it was. “Listen, I need to go now. Just get your bloody arse here, alright?”

“Shit,” he heard Thomas curse again, probably tripping over something. _That boy._ “I’m on my way!” The call ended and Newt shoved his phone in his trouser pocket before it was time for the bride to enter. What was Thomas doing?

He offered his arm out for Anne, who shot him a nervous smile as they linked their arms together. The pair walked in to the music as the people inside stood up and turned to look at them. Some of them pressed a hand to their chests and cooed, some of them with a phone on their hand, taking pictures. Newt turned his head to look at his mum; she only looked forward to Steve, who was doing the same.

Newt saw the look in their eyes; he couldn’t help but beam at the two. He wanted that. He wanted to look at someone and for someone to look at him that way.

Unfortunately for him, the only person he wanted to have that with didn’t feel the same.

Finally, they reached their destination and Newt stepped to the side, watching as Steve took Anne’s hand. It felt like Newt was handing his mother to Steve completely, after years of him protecting and taking care of her.

The wedding began and Newt stood to the side, watching as vows were spoken, rings exchanged, and promises made. He let himself shed a tear as Steve kissed his mum. The cheers from the crowd made the moment feel dreamlike. She had finally found someone. He clapped and beamed at his mother and stepfather, holding Brenda close to him all the while.

Confetti was thrown over them outside as the photographer made them take numerous pictures. Newt’s eyes scanned the crowd for Thomas. The bastard still wasn’t here. What was taking him so long?

 

* * *

 

 

After the main ceremony, they travelled to a nice little hall that was made up with tables and a dance floor that Anne and Steve now danced on. Brenda sat beside him as he watched his new family. “We should dance.” She said. “Or are you waiting for Thomas?”

Newt shook his head and smiled at Brenda, the white flower crown on her head made her look more strikingly beautiful. “Sure, we can dance. Thomas isn’t here yet.”

“Wow,” Brenda said, gently tugging on his arm and pulled them to the dance floor. “I nearly never hear you use his real name. It’s almost always Tommy with you.”

Newt frowned as the song got more upbeat. “It slipped, I guess.”

He was starting to worry about Thomas’ whereabouts. He was sure it wouldn’t be longer than two songs before it was time for his speech. He had his speech on a piece of paper that he folded neatly in his pocket, feeling like a weight on his side as time ticked on.

Just as he heard the intro of _I’m Yours_ by Jason Mraz, he felt a tap on his shoulder. He turned around to find Thomas throwing his arms out, his mouth morphing into a huge grin. “I made it!”

Newt puffed out a relieved breath and pulled Thomas into a hug, just because. “You made it!”

“Of course I did—I said I would,” Thomas said.

Neither of them bothered to let go, they stayed like that instead, with Newt’s arms around Thomas’ neck, while Thomas circled his arms around Newt’s waist. Newt was not going to complain.

“Still, you nearly missed my speech!” Newt pouted as he tried—and failed—to calm his heartbeat down at their closeness. It had been a long time since he had an excuse to be this close with Thomas, anyway. So he couldn’t exactly blame himself for that, either.

Thomas probably thought that Newt’s fidgety attitude was because of his nervousness about the speech. Because then he stepped impossibly closer toward Newt and leaned down. “Hey, you’ll be okay, yeah?”

 _If you could take a step back,_ Newt thought as he swallowed, _maybe I’ll start breathing properly again._

“Yeah—I mean,” Newt coughed, forcing him to smile. “I know I’ll be okay.”

And _fuck_. Thomas was smiling down at him with those stupid lips that Newt had kissed. Newt suddenly found himself struggling to breathe, because all he had to do was take a step forward and lift his head up so their lips could meet. If Newt were selfish enough to ruin their friendship over a kiss, he would’ve done it.

Newt was so close to fucking things up and taking the damn chance. He could just run away with an excuse that the kiss was just for show, but then Brenda tapped a clear glass with a spoon. It was time for his speech.

He didn’t realize how or when he made his way to the stage to stand in front of the entire party of guests, with a mic on his left hand and the speech on the other. “Uh,” Newt tried out, unfolding the paper with shaky hands. “Okay, first of all, I wanted to thank everyone for coming.”

Newt stared out at the crowd, briefly catching everyone’s eyes before they fell on Thomas. The brunet gave him two thumbs up with a big smile. Newt held their gaze, and it felt like someone had pressed the pause button on the world. Newt almost gasped at the realization of how _in love_ he was with Thomas right now. And, _God_ , shouldn’t he have stopped falling by now? He should’ve hit the ground at _some_ point, right?

Or maybe, like every other thing, Thomas was an exception to that rule, too.

He heard someone clear their throat; he had obviously been silent for quite a while. The blond's eyes shifted to the paper in his hand, before stuffing it away, putting it back in his pocket.

He knew exactly what he was going to say.

Newt cleared his throat and took a final breath. “Mum, Steve.” He began, looking at his parents. “You have fallen in love with your best friend.”

Newt could see from the corner of his eyes that Thomas was frowning. Probably wondering why Newt bailed on the speech that they wrote. He tried his best to ignore it.

“I think it is the best way to fall in love.” He continued, smiling down at them. “You fell for the person that made you feel happy. Made you laugh. Or maybe even cry. It’s the best way because you fell in love with someone that you _know_. Someone you’re familiar with. Someone that embodies you. Someone you can’t see yourself without.”

His gaze was met with Thomas’, who had a confused look on his face. Newt forced himself to look away.

“And yeah, maybe it was confusing at first, because you didn’t see it coming. And you finally realised, maybe you had been in love with them the whole time.” It felt like someone had stabbed him repeatedly in the chest as he let those words out. “You let yourself fall and fall harder each day. And it felt good for a while, safe, even. Until you start to wonder, do they feel the same way too?” Newt didn’t dare to look at anyone, so he shifted his gaze toward his shoes instead.

“You two, though,” Newt addressed his mum and Steve, not wanting for his speech to be about his sad, unrequited love life. “You guys didn’t have to go through all that pain. You guys just fell, and caught each other.” Anne gave him a fond smile as she cried.

“And Steve. I thank you for bringing so much joy into my mother’s life.” Newt said as tears prickled at his eyes, earning a genuine smile from Steve. “It was hard to accept a new man in our life. But you were always there for us in our hardest time. You were—still are—her rock and brought so much happiness I never thought I’d see in her again. I'm proud to call you my step-father.” Anne smiled and nestled into her husband’s shoulder. He darted his eyes toward Thomas for a brief second before muttering his penultimate line;

“I only wish that one day, I can have the same love that you do."

Newt raised his glass, "To Anne and Steve." The whole party raised their glasses and hailed the same sentence before erupting into applause.

He put the mic down on the table, walked out into the crowd to kiss his mum on the cheek and hug Steve tightly as everybody continued clapping. He knew he couldn’t stay though, his emotions were threatening to burst from him like a volcano at any moment and he didn't want to be around his mother when that happened, he didn't want to ruin her special day. Therefore, without so much as a glance toward his family after their embrace or Thomas, he ran out of the building, feeling himself close to uncontrollable tears already.

He wove through the crowd until he was at the fire exit, pushing open the door to take a huge gasp of breath before he keeled over, put his hands on his knees and cried. He felt such strong emotions after the speech; not caring if he was being obvious that every single word he said was dedicated to Thomas.

And _fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck._

He didn’t know what to do. Despite everything that he said, he hated how he let himself fall into this situation. Newt let out a frustrated groan mixed with a sob. Out of all the people in the world, he had let himself fall for Tommy. Someone who wasn’t only out of his limit, but his own best friend.

Newt hated it when he cried, his breathing got so out of control that he felt as if he were suffocating, his shoulders wouldn't stop shaking, and his eyes burned. What he hated the most was how it made him feel _weak_. He didn't want to feel at all.

Deep down he'd always known that he would never have Thomas in the way that he wanted. Yet, he let his walls down anyway. He was the one to blame, really. It was his own stupid, selfish fault. So much for him never crying over Thomas Murphy ever again.

“Dude, that speech turned out to be so much better than the crap we wrote!” he heard Thomas say behind him happily.

 _Great_ , because the last thing he needed right now was Thomas comforting him.

When did his life become so ironic?

“Newt?” He faced away from Thomas as the brunet continued, taking out a cigarette from the inside pocket of his suit jacket before lighting it. He took a long drag before lifting his head up, blowing out the smoke slowly. From the corner of his eye, he could see Thomas stepping closer. “That speech was great, but why the sudden change?”

Newt didn’t reply. Not because he didn’t want to, but he was afraid he’d blow up in front of Thomas. So he kept his mouth shut.

It would be an easy thing to do if Thomas would just stop trying. He felt the brunet grip Newt’s shoulder, making him turn around.

Newt didn’t want Thomas to see his tear stained cheeks. He didn’t want Thomas to see him being so weak, so pathetic. He lowered his face, looking at his shoes to hide his glassy eyes. But the gesture only made another tear fall to the floor.

“Newt? What’s wrong? Why are you crying? Hey— look at me...”

He refused to look up. Thomas shook his shoulders lightly, worry clearly written on his face.

“Did I do something wrong?”

_Stop. Talking._

He took a step back, feeling the all too-familiar lump in his throat again. The question made Newt want to break down. To punch Thomas square in the jaw and tell him to stop being such an oblivious prick, because how could he not see what had been going on with him?

Newt gritted his teeth, biting his tongue lightly before taking another drag of nicotine. A wave of confusion swept over him, had Thomas really been so unaware of everything? Newt had shown his feelings toward the brunet—maybe not in the most obvious way, but still—and yet, here they were.

And you know what? Fuck it. Newt was done hiding his feelings in the dark. He’d had enough of bottling up his feelings. He knew this could ruin their friendship, but he wanted to be selfish just for today. For himself.

“Newt. Please,” Thomas took a step closer, his hand roamed Newt’s back. The brunet turned him around, resting his arm on where Newt’s neck met his shoulder. “I can’t help you if you—!“

It felt as if someone had shaken the soda bottle repeatedly and harshly; Newt couldn’t help but burst out of the bottle, spilling it's content everywhere.

“I love you!” Newt blurted out so suddenly that his voice cracked. He closed his eyes tightly, too afraid to see the look on Thomas’ face. “I’m _in love_ with you.

“This whole faking it thing only made me realize my true feelings for you. That I've been in love with you since the moment we first met!" Throwing his cigarette to the pavement below him, he took a step forward. His eyes were still glued to the floor though; as if his shoes were guiding him through this.

“And I _know_ that you feel something every time we kiss.” He paused. “Especially at the threesome. You wouldn’t have run away if you didn’t.” He said, almost accusingly. He wasn't in control of what was leaving his mouth at that moment, as if his brain was no longer hardwired and his heart was driving his every action.

The fact that Thomas still hadn’t said anything the whole time made Newt feel nervous, afraid, even. But still, Newt lurched his feet forward, closing in to Thomas. “So, please, Tommy.” His tone was weak, if not begging. “ _Please_ tell me that I’m right.”

Newt took a deep breath and looked up, vision clearing slightly from the blur of tears clouding his sight. “Tell me that you love me back.”

The moment he laid his eyes on Thomas, he regretted it. Thomas looked as if he’d been slapped, recoiling from Newt with a frown creasing his forehead as if he was... in shock? And Newt will never forget what Thomas said.

“Newt, I—," Thomas stuttered, face disbelieving as he lightly shook his head, "I love you but... just not... I— have to go.”

He could only watch as Thomas took a few steps backward, eyes not leaving Newt and expression not changing, before breaking into a sprint back inside the building. He couldn’t do anything, couldn’t feel a single muscle or emotion anymore. It felt as if his heart had been ripped apart from his body. He sat down, not caring if it would make his trousers dirty. Newt let his head drop to his folded knees as he tried and failed to take calming breaths. 

_I have to go_ , Thomas had said. What did that even mean? Newt couldn’t believe after everything that he’d said, that was Thomas’ reply. _I love you, but just not in that way..._

Newt deserved so much more than that.

“What the hell did I just do?” Newt whispered to himself, tangling his hand in his hair. His lips twitched, before he let out a bitter laugh that turned into an ugly sob. If he had a penny for every time he had cried about Thomas, _damn_ , he’d be rich. 

He didn’t know what he cried about more; the fact that he just got rejected, or that he probably had ruined his friendship with Thomas forever. He decided that both of them were pretty equal. He kicked a pebble that was lying in front of him as if it was its fault that he felt this way.

But really, the more he thought about it, the more he realized that other than today, he’d never admitted his feelings toward Thomas out loud. Newt was sure if he hadn't pushed himself into telling Thomas what was wrong, he’d have kept it a secret forever.

It was such a turn of events, not even Newt expected that to happen. But if he was being honest, he felt _relieved_ to finally let it out of his chest, even if Thomas reacted badly about it.

Newt let out a guttural groan; the sound echoing in the cold air. He forced himself to stand up before wiping his tear-stained cheek and nose with the back of his hand. It was hard to walk since all he wanted to do was to crawl into his bed and forget about everything. But he knew that his family—he didn’t dare to hope for Thomas as well—must’ve been looking for him.

When he walked back into the party, it was as if nothing had happened. As if he didn’t just get his heart broken by someone he loved so much. Everyone was laughing as they ate the food that was served there. By the looks of it, he'd missed the cutting of the cake. Newt couldn’t help but scan room, looking for Thomas only to no avail. He was sure that Thomas had left the party.

“Newt,” he heard Brenda calling him from his right. When he turned his head, he was met with the sight of Brenda sitting gracefully on Aris’ lap. She motioned him to come over. She gasped once she had a good look at Newt’s face, standing up with a frown. “Are you okay? Where’s Thomas? Have you been crying?”

Newt didn’t answer. Though Brenda’s question confirmed to him that his eyes must’ve been red and puffy from all the crying. He flopped down onto the chair, burying his head in his hands. Newt squeezed his eyes shut so hard that he began to see colours dotting behind his eyelids. He let out a sigh and a few more silent tears.

How did he let this happen? Tonight could have been fun if he kept his big mouth shut. Everything that he said to Thomas was unpracticed, he could’ve done so much better. Maybe Thomas would've reacted differently. _Maybe_.

“Newt, do you want to talk about it?” He heard Brenda say as he felt her arm on his shoulder. He shook his head, leaning into her soft touch. Newt let her soothe him for another minute, before he heard keys being thrown on the table.

“What is that for?” Newt asked as he untangled himself from Brenda.

“It’s dad’s. I was going to use it since Aris didn’t bring his car today.” Brenda said, handing what turned out to be Steve’s car key—and some other keys that he didn’t know what for—to him. “But you clearly need it more. Drive yourself to a friend's and get yourself some sleep - you sure as hell look like you need it. And it will help.”

Newt frowned as he took the keys; it was cold in his hands, making jingling noises as he twirled the keys on his finger. “Um, thank you?”

Brenda nodded and pulled Aris with her to dance, leaving Newt alone once again. He checked for the time on his watch, 4:53pm, it said. That meant it wouldn’t be for another few hours until the reception party was over.

He looked up to find his mum standing over him, offering her hand out for him. “Dance with me, honey?” How could he say no when his mum just looked like the happiest person on earth? Despite how upset he was, he put on a brave face despite his pain inside, stood up and took her hand.

They danced for a while, and he was so thankful that his mum didn’t ask him anything. Though he knew this must be Brenda’s doing, she probably already gave Anne a heads-up. It was time for them to switch partners, so he danced with Brenda as Aris took the chance to dance with his mum. It made him wish that Thomas had stayed longer.

Finally, after reluctantly taking group photos, all the guests left one by one. He had asked for Steve’s permission to use his car before he left. And now, Newt sat on the driver’s seat, thinking long and hard about where he should go. He obviously couldn't go home, since he and Brenda had already made a deal to let their parents have it to themselves for the night.

Thomas’ house was definitely out of the list.

Newt could just go out of town, stop wherever he felt like it or just drive for hours to the middle of nowhere, but a text message interrupted his thoughts. As he saw who it was, he knew exactly where to go.

He chucked his jacket into the back of the car, loosening up his tie a little as the car roared into life. Carefully, he drove out of the parking lot,  turning his head to the right and left in search for Thomas’ car.

Newt shook his head immediately. _No._ He gritted his teeth as he gripped the steering wheel a little harder. He wasn't doing this. He was going to try to get over Thomas completely tonight. No matter how hard it would be, he knew it was for the best. It wasn’t as if Thomas would show up anytime and return Newt’s feelings, now, would he?

Not even ten minutes later, he parked his car in a familiar driveway. He got out of the car and walked ever so slowly to the porch, his heart beating frantically in his chest at what he was about to do. He knocked on the door hard; once, twice, before it finally was opened.

“Newt? Are you okay?”

Newt could only stand in front of the door and stare. He still had the time to turn around and leave, because he knew this wasn’t _right._ But he needed this.

“Is everything—?“

Newt didn’t answer as he stepped in and tugged on Minho’s shirt, pulling him closer, smashing their lips together.


	15. fifteen

Newt felt the clattering of their teeth at first as Minho’s mouth met his own, squeezing his eyes shut; he pressed himself closer to the slightly smaller, yet much buffer boy. The blond wasn’t thinking straight, not allowing his heart to drive his actions anymore as it thudded against his chest like it was trying to snap him out of his current state. He flicked that switch mentally and felt Minho pulling away from him with a confused crease between his furrowed eyebrows.

Swallowing, Newt felt Minho’s strong hands on his shoulders as he held him back and stared at him in a mixture of worry and bewilderment. His musky brown eyes scanned the blond’s face for a sign as to what was going on.

“I—Uh,” Minho ran a hand over his jaw and chin with a slight chuckle of his words, “Not that I’m not flattered you just did that, but seriously, is something the matter? Do you want to talk about—?”

“Shut up.” Newt almost growled with how hoarse his voice was from crying. Grabbing Minho once again – this time by cupping his jaw – he pushed him inside his house with their lips pressed hard together.

The blond backed Minho against the wall beside the entrance, and as Minho’s back met it he let out a small grunt and began hesitantly kissing the boy back. Newt didn’t allow himself to listen to his emotions, knowing that if he tuned in to that channel he would end up weeping miserably over Thomas, and that was the last thing he wanted to do now he was here.

Eventually Minho kissed Newt back with as much force as the other boy was administering. Newt remained fairly rigid in where he stood, holding his friend’s face as their mouths worked against each other, until Newt let out a gasp as he was flipped, Minho now pressing him into the wall.

Their lips moved hungrily against one another’s, Minho’s hands holding Newt’s waist and rubbing small circles into his side that made the blond close his eyes tighter. It was too tender, too loving, something he didn’t deserve for what he was doing. But he was in far too deep to stop now, or so he thought.

Heaving breaths, the two pulled away slightly and looked into each other’s eyes. Newt noticed that when Minho swallowed, his Adams apple bobbed the skin there was beginning to glisten. He gazed back into his eyes and Newt heard a ringing in his ears that drowned out the next words he spoke.

“Are your parents home?”

Minho blinked, eyelashes fluttering against his skin delicately and inched his face backwards just slightly in surprise when he realised what Newt was implying with his question.

He shook his head, “My parents usually stay out of town for work and don’t come back for another two weeks or so…”

With that, Newt felt his stomach begin to develop a sick feeling, warning him to get out now, he didn’t really want this. _If you get with Minho_ , Newt thought to himself through all the cautioning signs, _it will help you forget about Thomas_. At least, he hoped.

Their faces were still just inches from each other, the blond letting his eyes run over Minho’s features quickly. He was really quite a vision: beautiful tan skin, jet-black hair styled into his signature gravity-defying quiff, warm optimistic eyes and his lips were ample and soft.

The way Minho looked at him made Newt come to the realisation that maybe the jock liked Newt in a way that was a little more than friends. Oh, if only he had fallen for him instead.

Without any more hesitation, Newt leaned back in and let a hot breath out through his nose as their lips reconnected, prompting Minho to shut the front door with a hand quickly before holding the boy tightly. Their heads tilted to the side to explore each other’s mouths further, Newt wrapping his arms around his neck when their tongues began to come into play and Minho lifted Newt up by his legs. The blond hooked them around his hips in response to the sudden action, feeling the jock’s strong, chiselled arms holding him supportively. His entire body was in autopilot now, no longer feeling the pain of his heart and insides telling him to stop, despite him knowing they were still there.

A moan escaped Newt’s mouth, a noise he’d never made before, when Minho pulled back and latched his lips onto the blond’s neck, placing wet kisses up and down the skin there. The nipping at his tender skin failed to cease as Newt whined and scratched at his back, prompting Minho to move away from the wall and carry him slowly to his room, all whilst still kissing his jaw.

When Newt opened the door with his hand, the jock let him down so he could stand again, stumbling back into the room as they kissed once more and both fumbled with the buttons and hems of their shirts. The blond’s slim fingers struggled to undo each catch, the adrenaline causing his hands to shake until he finally pulled off the smart attire.

Minho was quick to pull off his black t-shirt, letting it fall to the floor by his feet, alongside his sweatpants; Newt kicked off his shoes, socks and shimmied out of his trousers, before his legs hit the bed, sliding himself back onto the mattress so he was lying on his back. In a few short seconds, he felt the mattress dip slightly and Minho appeared over him, incredible body hovering over Newt, making him feel small and inadequate in comparison.

However, the way the boy above him looked at Newt made him feel different again. As he was mere millimetres away from Newt’s swollen lips, Minho asked between quick breaths, “Is this your first…?”

Newt’s eyes scanned the boy’s face. It wasn’t judgmental, it wasn’t angry; it was a face of concern and care. He wished Minho wouldn’t look at him like that, head still throbbing from his earlier wave of emotion.

As he nodded, Newt leant up to close the gap and press his red lips against Minho’s once again, hoping that he could get this over and done with soon, so it could ease him of the pain of the night.

But instead of engulfing him in a fire of forceful kisses, Minho pushed Newt away slowly for the umpteenth time that evening and shut his eyes for a second, reopening them when he began to speak.

“A-are you sure? I just… don’t want to take advantage of you—“

Newt shook his head and swallowed, heart thudding in his fear and anticipation and internal conflict. “Shut up, Minho.”

The jock didn’t say another word as he dived down and attached their lips once again, lighting a fire in Newt’s stomach, causing him to move his hands from Minho’s broad, bare shoulders up to his hair.

Wet lips trailed varied pressured kisses down Newt’s chest and stomach, making the blond’s lip tremble before their mouths met once again, moans escaping both of their throats as they fought for supremacy and occasionally bit down lightly on bottom lips.

Newt knew his situation down below was going to become a problem soon and as Minho began to breathe and kiss below his ear, he gave one final option out of what they were doing.

“We can s-stop here. We don’t have to go any furth-further.” Minho groaned into his neck as their bare torsos ran over each other.

Newt squeezed his eyes shut so hard he began seeing colours bursting like stars behind his eyelids. He bit his lip. He should stop. He should wait. Everything in his body was screaming at him to stop being so stupid, to wait, to not give up on Thom—

“No,” Newt sighed. “I want this.”

 

* * *

 

 

_“Why do we have to learn this kinda stuff anyway?” Thomas groaned, pushing his textbook off Minho’s bed as Newt tapped his pen and the jock reappeared in the room, carrying three bowls of chips, fries and something that Newt wasn’t sure about, covered in chocolate._

_“You’re on the track-team, man. You should care about metabolism and this kinda stuff, c’mon!” Minho placed the bowls down on the floor as he took a seat on his hard wooden floor. “Plus, this science project is for our final grade of the semester, so it’s kind of important.”_

_Newt nodded up at Thomas who huffed out a harsh breath. “He’s right you know.”_

_Minho shrugged and threw his hands up, cocky smile plastered on his face as he took a handful of chips. “Hey, I’m always right!”_

_Newt pursed his lips and stared at their group science project that was laid out in front of them, life-size drawing of the human body labelled with detailed captions and equations._

_“You know, I’m kind of glad I got put with you, shanks. You ain’t half as bad as some of my friends made you out to be.” Minho announced, twirling a pair of scissors between his fingers before snatching up a piece of paper to cut out._

_“Wow,” Thomas snorted, “I don’t know whether I should take that as a compliment or not.”_

_Newt watched as Minho stood up and jabbed Thomas in his side, ushering for him to stand up beside him. With a quick look at the blond and a roll of his eyes, the brunet stood beside Minho and frowned in confusion._

_Folding his legs, the Brit observed as Minho tried to explain part of their project to Thomas in terms of exercise – and in their case, the sport they knew: running. He took in the scene, watching as the tanned boy got the brunet to stand in various poses, hold his breathing, touch certain parts of his body as he explained the science behind what they were doing._

_There was a spark in Thomas’ eyes that Newt spotted as the boy began to get a grasp on what they were doing, responding to Minho with correct answers as he clapped his back and smiled for encouragement._

_“Dude, that was awesome.” Thomas grinned once Minho took a step back and nodded to signal that he’d finished. Newt couldn’t help but smile at the two of them and then move his gaze to the paper they’d been using._

_“Maybe we don’t need a diagram,” Newt spoke up, earning the attention of both his partners. “If you do exactly what you just did in front of the class, but adding my working out and a bit of… comedy, maybe? We could do a physical presentation – get the class slightly involved and teach the science kinetically, I’m sure that would earn us more marks than a sheet of paper.”_

_The brunet flopped back onto the bed and ruffled Newt’s already fluffy hair with a hand, Minho chuckling as he watched._

_“I think we’ve just aced ourselves a science project.”_

 

* * *

 

Newt lay on his back on the bed, staring up at the ceiling, unmoving. The memory of a few months ago filled his mind with a past optimism. His mind burned in a pulsing sadness, the kind that anyone else could’ve mistaken for a simple headache, but that Newt knew was something else entirely.

Rolling onto his side, the blond slid both hands slowly under the pillow he was resting on. His face was slightly hidden as it transformed into an expression of utter regret and sadness; Minho got back into the bed beside him.

“Are you okay?” The boy asked as he lifted the covers from the bottom of the bed up over Newt’s bare body. He stilled as Minho carefully set his sweaty hair to the side a little so it didn’t stick over his eyes.

He scrunched his face up tight, his heart never ceasing its harsh beating. The room smelling like sex and sweat did nothing to stop his racing thoughts or heart. Once he reopened them and took a breath, Newt sighed. “Y-yeah… I’m fine.”

Unexpectedly, Newt felt Minho run a soft, gentle hand over his shoulder before equally as soft lips met the skin there in a quick touch. All he could think of was how gentle Minho had been, how he had made sure at every moment that Newt was okay and satisfied. Oh, how he wished Minho wouldn’t do that. Still, the blond looked up at the jock and gave a small smile.

“Thanks… for all of that.” Newt managed to croak out, throat dry and hoarse.

Minho nodded and smiled tenderly back at him, letting out a light chuckle. “Not a problem. I’m just surprised you came to me and wanted… _that_. You know you can talk to me about anything if you—?”

“I just want to sleep.”

Newt let his head fall back to the side as he buried his face into the pillow. He felt Minho flinch behind him, but he didn’t turn back to look. He didn’t want to see Minho’s face. He didn’t want to see the hurt in his eyes, especially not after he’d seen his face just minutes before with a different expression entirely.

“O-okay, sure. Of course, Newt.”

Tears threatened to surface again, so he bit his lip to stop himself crying as Minho silenced. The bed dipped and then rose to signal the boy leaving the bed, and the sound of a draw being opened rattled in his ears.

“Here, I have some new underwear I’ve never worn. They may be a little big, but you can wear them if you want.”

The padding of feet on the same wooden floor they’d done their science project on filled Newt’s mind, and as he opened his eyes again he saw a hand offering him a fresh pair of boxers. Slipping a hand out from under the pillow, Newt gratefully took the clothing and whispered, “Thank you, Min.”

With a quick shuffling under the covers, Newt slipped them on and tried to smile at the boy more convincingly. Minho smoothed out the sheets after slipping into his own underwear and made sure everything was comfortable for him.

“Now go to sleep. I’ll be okay on the couch tonight.” Folding his arms across his strong, bare chest before moving to turn off the bedroom light. “Sleep well, Newt.”

The lights turned off and the door was pulled halfway shut as Minho ventured off to make a bed for himself on the sofa in his lounge. The blond watched him leave for a while, admiring the curve of his back that he had clawed into and held onto so tightly mere minutes ago.

Newt curled up into a ball and everything started to rush back to him – the pain of his emotions and now a creeping pain after what they had just done. What hit him hardest was his guilt — he had told himself to stop, but he had enjoyed it. He had enjoyed the feeling, loved the intimacy, and most of all adored the release… He just wished with all his heart that it had been different circumstances, and with the person he loved so much.

 

* * *

 

 

_Newt moaned loudly, head thrown back as he reached his climax. His breath was ragged and he tried with all his might not to blurt out Thomas’ name as he came._

 

* * *

 

 

He woke late Saturday evening with a light shaking of his shoulder. Opening his eyes, Newt found Minho staring down at him, hair messy and rather adorable in his sleepy state. He didn’t think he’d ever seen the jock without his jelled hairstyle, but he had obviously just woken up himself and hadn’t had time to get ready.

“Hey, how are you feeling?”

Looking up in slight confusion, Newt took a few seconds to remember why exactly he was in Minho’s house, in his bed, mostly naked.

Thomas.

Minho.

He ran a hand over his face and rolled onto his back, groaning at the sudden pain he felt around his ass. Newt gritted his teeth and attempted to sit up slowly.

“What time it?” The blond croaked out, only to have Minho hand him a cold glass of water from the nightstand that he accepted gratefully.

“Quarter-past-ten. Thought I’d let you sleep for a bit.”

Newt took a sip from the glass, still feeling groggy. His face was only slightly puffy but he felt horrible. But a chuckle escaped his lips at Minho. “You call a few hours kip a proper sleep?”

Minho shrugged and a small smile appeared on his face, “Maybe it’s just enough for me. I’m a light sleeper and run better with a few hours than a long nap.”

Finishing another gulp of water, the blond set the glass down on the table and ran a hand through his matted hair, tugging at knots and clumps to try and rid his locks of them.

“You have a car, right? Do you want me to drive you home?”

Newt stopped his action, realising that Minho was avoiding talking about their _activities_ earlier that night in case the blond was still uncomfortable. He didn’t know how he felt about that.

With a shrug, Newt swung his legs over the side of the bed and tried to stand up, only to end up groaning and sitting back down. He pulled the covers high up over his bare chest.

Pattering feet disappeared and reappeared in a few minutes, the smell of freshly cooked dinner wafting through the air as Minho held out a plate for the Brit to take.

“Here, I made food. You should eat.”

The smell was tempting, his mouth watering at the bacon and toast and waffles spread out on the plate. But he wasn’t hungry and he said that, only to have the jock insist he had even just a few bites of toast.

 _He’s probably right_ , Newt thought as he gave in and took the buttered toast, nibbling at the corner. His eyes flickered up to the Asian’s soft features and he smiled.

“Thanks, Minho.” Newt nodded, thanking him for more than just the food.

Almost as prompted, Minho nodded and placed the plate down. “Finish that and when you’re done, we can talk about this.”

He swallowed the food nervously but nodded, watching as Minho went to his wardrobe to grab some day clothes for himself. He put a few shirts down for Newt if he wanted to change into them before grabbing his own stuff, heading to the bathroom to shower and change.

It would be so much easier if Minho weren’t this caring towards him.

Newt finished up half of the food prepared for him before he didn’t feel like eating anymore. He put the plate aside and picked up a shirt from the pile, pulling it over his head. It was slightly loose on his thin frame, but he was thankful to have something to wear other than his tear-stained wedding attire.

He failed to notice that the noise of the shower ceased and as he began to change fully, he caught sight of Minho re-emerging into the room fully clothed with flat wet hair. Newt quickly fastened his trousers and sat back down to see Minho’s eyes flicker up and down Newt’s body. Maybe Minho liked to see his lover wearing his clothes. This made Newt’s heart and stomach do something funny, and he smiled faintly at him as the jock wandered over.

“So,” Minho said, tone reminding Newt of the day they had talked about Thomas and him faking it for the first time, “tell me what happened.”

Newt picked at his short nails nervously, refusing to look Minho in the eye for a few solid minutes. Was he ready to talk about everything that had happened earlier? He didn’t know if he ever would be, but he needed to start somewhere.

“Newt, please talk to me. I’ll listen to you and try to help you. I would never judge you for anything.”

Finally, the blond looked up and searched the raven-haired boy’s eyes. There was genuine concern and care in them, which made Newt take a deep breath.

“I confessed my feelings for Thomas to him… and…” Newt trailed, not sure if he could say anything else without feeling his whole body want to burst out into tears again.

“He reacted badly?” Minho finished for him, earning a slight nod from the blond to his right.

Newt looked back down at his lap and his lip trembled, words barely leaving his throat. “I ruined everything…”

Minho shook his wet head and shuffled closer, putting an arm carefully around his back as Newt brought his hands to his face. “No. No you didn’t.”

“I just lost my best friend because of this.” Newt whimpered as the boy rubbed his back soothingly. He found the familiar lump in his throat was there again and he whispered into his hands so quietly that Minho couldn’t hear. “I’m so sorry, Minho.”

The jock leaned down, “What was that?”

“I’m so sorry. For everything.”

He felt sick; he could see the sadness hidden in Minho’s eyes as he shrugged “Nah. It’s okay.”

Blond hair splayed out, as Newt shook his head, “No… I _used_ you… I’m so unbelievably sorry.”

Twitching slightly, Minho flinched and sighed, putting on a fake happy tone. “It’s _okay_ , Newt. One-night stands are kind of my thing, you know? Burning off some steam and all that klunk.”

Newt felt even worse now. He had gotten to know Minho well over the past few weeks and he really liked him a lot. He was a great friend; he cared for Newt as Newt cared about him in return. But now, there was a fear rooted in his mind that he might have lost him too.

“I’m still sorry,” he continued to reiterate, earning him a nudge on the shoulder from the buffer boy.

“Sure. Now come on, I’ll drive you and your perky ass home.”

After the pair gathered up Newt’s things, the blond realised by staring at his suit that he was not a virgin anymore. He had lost it because the only person he wanted to give his first time to hadn’t returned his feelings, and he wanted to hurt himself as well as the brunet.

It was ironic, Newt pondered, how Thomas was the one desperate for sex, but he had been the one to have it first.

They soon after walked outside to his car, and Newt passed the boy his keys, asking when Minho wanted his shirt back as they slipped inside the vehicle. Minho started the engine and smiled over at the blond, telling him to return it whenever he liked, it wasn’t anything special.

Newt fished out his phone as they backed out of the drive, expecting a call or text from Thomas. But of course there were none. His cell was filled with a few texts from his family asking when he would be home and general congratulations from friends. He decided he had very little interest in either and locked it to stop his emotions getting the better of him.

As the drive went on, Newt was aware of Minho’s constant looks over at him. He took off his shoes and pulled his legs up on the seat, hugging them despite the pain and discomfort it brought him. “Do you mind?”

Minho shook his head at the action. “Go ahead, but if they smell, I’m going to kill you.”

The jock tried to joke, and to Newt’s surprise he found himself laughing as he rested his head in the crook of his knees. He stared out of the window, remembering the scenery, as it was the route he had taken when driving earlier that night.

Newt heard the boy beside him clear his throat to fill the silence, obviously aching to say something. He turned his head to look at Minho, who was fidgeting in his seat as they neared the Isaacs’ household.

“Hey, Newt…  I wanted to ask you something.” The jock started hesitantly, slowing the car down.

Humming, Newt tilted his head and raised his eyebrows. “Yeah? What is it?”

Minho moved his jaw around nervously, running a hand through his un-sculpted hair before he pulled up in front of Newt’s house. “Okay, this is going to sound so totally out of the blue and I’m not sure I should really… Fuck. Okay.”

Nerves were radiating off him and Newt couldn’t help but find it cute how he stuttered and jittered.

“I’ve just gotta admit… I’ve been thinking about you a lot lately. A hell of a lot… And I know it’s a crappy time. Like, hella crappy but… _God_ , why is this so hard? It’s never like this with girls.” Minho bounced his leg a little and looked over at Newt, eyes creasing in the corners as his face screwed up a little. “Could I… take you out some time?”

Newt blinked multiple times, mouth falling open. He just about managed to squeak out, “Y-you’re serious? Minho…”

“Shit. Why did I even say that? I knew it was a bad time to…” Minho ran another hand through his hair before holding his head. “Me and my big shucking mouth. Just— just forget it. Pretend I never said that. Let’s rewind back a few seconds and just… Fuck.”

Too stunned in his seat to reply, Newt sat watching Minho’s nervous mannerisms and scolding of himself as the blond’s mind raced. Yeah, it was a bad time, Newt agreed but something in his brain was pushing through. If Newt wanted to get over Thomas, maybe trying to like someone else was the best option. He’d already slept with the jock, and he clearly had feelings for Newt, so why couldn’t he try and reciprocate them?

“I’ll, uh, think about it.” Newt interrupted Minho’s muttering, causing him to stop as he quickly leant forward and kissed the boy on the cheek before getting out with his stuff.

Newt stood beside the car for a minute, eyes closed, taking deep breaths before he started to make his way towards his house. His lower body still hurt, but he was getting used to it.

The blond turned on the porch and forced a smile on his face as he waved at Minho with his free hand. He saw the tanned boy climb out of the car and lock it, chucking the keys over to Newt, who managed to catch them. Minho smiled back and began to jog backwards, heading out of his driveway at a steady pace for the run back to his house.

Once the jock had disappeared, Newt unlocked the door to the house and went inside only to find it empty. He came to the conclusion that his mother and Steve must’ve checked into a hotel to celebrate, and he knew Brenda was at Aris’.

Sighing, Newt ascended the stairs, thinking about how long the day had been. Upon entering his room, a welcome sight, he threw everything he was carrying onto his bed. The cigarette packet in his suit jacket was removed from the pocket and he clambered out of the window to sit on his roof, bringing a pillow with him so the tiling wasn’t so hard on his ass.

Settling down, Newt pulled out a roll-up and recalled Thomas’ face when he had told him his feelings. What had Newt been thinking? That Thomas – still insanely obsessed with Teresa Agnes, Thomas – would kiss him and say he loved him back? He almost laughed at his foolishness, lighting the cigarette with his lighter as he lay back on the roof and took a long drag. Why couldn’t he have just kept his feelings inside, suppressed them so it was as if nothing had changed between them, even if they had?

With his free hand, Newt punched the roof. He felt like an idiot and he could only imagine what Thomas must have been thinking at that moment after his confession. His heart slumped in his chest at the thought of things changing drastically between him and the brunet.

What was worse that come Monday, they had three classes together, and Newt was terrified that Thomas wouldn’t speak to him, or he wouldn’t be able to face him.

Laughing humorously, Newt shook his head and let out a small yell into the darkness of the night, not caring that the noise may have woken the neighbours. “What the hell was I thinking?”

He realised that in that moment he hadn’t been thinking at all, it had been his heart taking the control it needed.

Trying his best to think of the funny side of the situation, Newt found himself failing as there was absolutely nothing funny or happy about it. He knew now what people meant when they were experiencing heartbreak, because his heart burned and ached in his chest at the possible loss of his soulmate.

The weight of the phone in his pocket irritated the blond, as he wanted nothing more than to dial Thomas, but he knew he wouldn’t be able to face hearing his voice if he did pick up. Not now. Not yet.

With another drag of smoke, nicotine running through his body, Newt swung his legs over the edge and blew out the cloud of grey. It calmed him slightly, head no longer spinning as violently. He wished he could turn back time like Minho had wanted to do with his question, to undo the confession and everything afterwards.

It was crazy how fast things were changing. Not just about Thomas, but about his life too. Though now he thought about it, his ‘life’ had pretty much been about Thomas this, Thomas that, ever since they first met. It hit him that he was growing up too soon. _How I miss the time before high school_ , he admitted in his head.

He missed when no one cared about relationships like the one he so longed for; when things were simpler, and the idea of a ‘fake relationship to gain popularity’ was ridiculous and didn’t exist.

Finishing off his cigarette, he blunted it on the tiles and stood up to walk back inside with his pillow, a strange feeling creeping up inside him as he flopped onto his bed. He finally reached for his phone and chewed on his lip as he unlocked it. Maybe it was the nicotine; maybe it was his confused, angry, sad, emotional state, but Newt opened up the messages and began typing.

Newt wasn’t sorry for confessing his feelings for Thomas. The result hadn’t been what he wanted but the event had lifted a huge weight off his chest, as if he was setting free the true him. But this, what he was writing out, this was safety, security from the events he’d stirred that scared him.

Setting his phone down on his nightstand, he plugged the charger in and kicked off his shoes, not bothering to change. He balled his fists into the sheets and screwed his eyes shut. He had Sunday to recover, to rebuild his defences, to recompose himself and this was the first step as he fell asleep, phone buzzing in the dark.

 

**Newt: my answer is yes**

**Minho: That makes me very happy. Very happy indeed.**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SO MY EXAMS ARE OVER AND THE FIRST THING I DID YESTERDAY WAS RUSH HOME AND WRITE THIS CHAPTER im so happy and relieved and ready to write tons for you guys!  
> Some of you may not be pleased with what's happening in this chapter, but we promise it's all necessary and will all have a purpose in the end, so hang in there :-) plus, we told you Minho would have a bigger role in there somewhere, so props to you if you guessed this would be the part he'd play ha  
> Also theres a slight flashback here to pre-faking it Newtmas and how they became friends with Minho here so I hope that was a nice add-on for y'all.  
> THE RESPONSE TO THE LAST CHAPTER WAS SO AMAZING I AM SO OVERWHELMED YOU WON'T BELIEVE IT so hang in there for lots more (hopefully) frequent chapters coming your way! Thank you so much for continually reading and commenting, we love you.
> 
> tarantism (rosie)


	16. sixteen

Waking the next morning, Newt groaned into his pillow as the pain and soreness in his lower region reminded him of the previous night’s endeavours. He muscled all his strength to sit up on his mattress, scrunching his face up at how uncomfortable it felt, even on a soft area; Newt rubbed his eyes.

The blond thought that after a good sleep the pain would’ve subsided a little, but he guessed that since it was his first time it would take longer for the ache to ease.

Newt peeled open his eyes and winced… his _first time_.

Consuming sadness filled his mind every time he moved, as Newt remembered that it wasn’t Thomas that had made him feel safe, secure and gave him so much pleasure the previous night. He wanted to blame Minho for this, but it wasn’t his fault in the slightest – the boy had given him so many chances to stop, but he’d kept pushing himself onto Minho; he had enjoyed what they had done – even if it was for the wrong reasons.

And now he had agreed to let the jock take him out. On a _date_. Newt inhaled a sharp breath and let it out in an elongated sigh.

A rattling of the lock downstairs swiftly succeeded by the opening of the front door alerted Newt to the return of his family. From the muttered voices in amongst the giggling, Newt would have thought Brenda and Aris had stopped by, but the deep chuckle that followed told him it was his mother and Steve.

Gritting his teeth, Newt managed to stand up, albeit his ass felt like it was burning. He shuffled slowly to the landing to stare down the stairs at the sight before him: his stepfather carrying Anne bridal-style around the house.

With a smile on his face at the sight, Newt greeted them.

“Hey, Mum. Hey, Steve.”

“Newtie! Where did you disappear off to last night after the reception? We wanted to see you before you left.” Anne questioned as her husband placed her carefully on the stairs, allowing her to skip up them and hug her son.

Newt stilled him her arms, but eventually swallowed and curled his hands around her in an embrace. “I was at Minho’s… he, uh, wanted help for… his mum’s birthday party and it was kind of urgent.”

It was a lame attempt at an excuse, but different so he hoped it would work.

“Oh,” she shorter blonde woman sighed, “well it would’ve been nice if you had come and told us where you were rushing off to.”

“I’m sorry, Mum,” He scrunched his eyes closed. “I just really needed to leave – Minho needed me, and Thomas and I…”

The words caught in his throat, he couldn’t even speak about his (former? He prayed not. The word made him feel sick to the point where he could’ve thrown up) best friend and unrequited _love of his life_.

Anne hugged him tighter still. “Shh, it’s okay. Whatever you and Thomas did, you can make it up. You always do.”

At that, Newt buried his head into his mother’s shoulder, fists balled into the back of her jacket as he inhaled a choking gasp on the verge of tears.

 

* * *

 

 

Whatever you and Thomas did, you can make it up.

_Images of the pair of them at eleven years old, playing in the park just outside their new middle school. They had in their heads a small Olympics sporting event, where each of the climbing frames and structures would determine who was the ultimate sporting champion._

_Newt’s leg had just healed from it’s cast in a climbing accident, courtesy of Thomas’ eleventh birthday party and he was convinced that – even though he had a slight limp now – he could still compete at the same level as his doe eyed best friend._

_As they climbed and clambered and sprinted and leaped all over the park, Thomas cheered and threw his hands in the air, declaring himself the high champion of their competition. Newt slumped down on the roundabout solemnly and sniffed, wiping his nose on his sleeve._

_“I got you, Newt! I got you!”_

_Bragging comes as an unavoidable part of young life, and with Thomas there – fit and not limping and_ perfect _– swinging his arms out in grand gestures announcing his win, Newt couldn’t help but feel defeated and so hurt. He wanted to win something against his best friend for once, but that never really seemed to be the case when Thomas was involved._

_“Want a rematch against my unbeatable powers?”_

_Newt refused to look into the boy’s glimmering chestnut eyes as he sulked, clenching and unclenching his jaw._

_“I don’t want to play anymore.”_

_“C’mon, Newt. Don’t be such a spoilsport!”_

_“No, Tommy – it’s not fair! Why can’t we play something I want to for a change?”_

_“Because,” Thomas began to push the roundabout in a circle, making Newt spin, “I don’t understand any of your games, and they’re not as fun as mine.”_

_“Maybe I don’t find your games fun.”_

_“Well, you play them so they must be.”_

_The blond put his foot down on the floor of the park, slowing the roundabout to a stop before getting up and walking away from the other young boy._

_“Where are you going?” Thomas called after him, frowning._

_“Home. I told you, I’m not playing anymore.”_

_“You know what, Newt! Fine, I’ll find other friends to play with!”_

_“Fine!”_

_“Fine!”_

“Fine!” _Newt yelled, tears brimming at his eyes but he refused to turn around, grabbing his school bag by the gate before running home as fast as his little legs would carry him._

_He had run straight into his mother’s arms in the garden as she went to check what mail they’d gotten in their mailbox that day. The tears flooded his vision and seeped into her cream-coloured pants._

_She’d told him the exact same thing then as she had now._

You always do.

 

* * *

 

 

“It’s all right, son.” A clap on the shoulder reminded him of Steve’s presence, and he sniffed as he looked up at him from his mother’s embrace.

With a nod in conformation, Anne and Newt let go of one another with a smile. His mother backed slightly into Steve’s arms as she announced that they were back to pack for their honeymoon, as their flight was that evening to the Caribbean. The blond nodded and explained that he’d be fine, he was just being overdramatic before he returned to his room.

Newt shut the door and winced as he moved back to the bed. So, his parents would be gone for a week, which meant that Brenda would use the opportunity to throw a party at the house. He contemplated what he would do during the time, not wanting to mope around the house. Unless, he wondered, Minho could drag him out of his misery? He doubted that would happen in such a small time.

He had the rest of the day to cheer himself up before school, snuggling back under the covers where it was warm and comfortable and comforting. However, without realising it he reached for his phone, unlocking it to stare at Thomas’ contact sadly.

He should call. He should apologise. The same emotions from the previous night swirled in his brain and made his stomach feel funny, especially looking at the dopey picture he had saved for the boy in the top hand corner: a picture he’d taken on the day they’d ventured out to six flags during summer, Thomas sitting on a bench with a theme park cup in his hand, tongue stuck out in a goofy manner. He locked his cell and set it aside once more.

Deciding the best cure for the kind of thing he was feeling was to stay in bed al day, Newt wrapped himself in the blankets and wallowed in self-pity, replaying his first sexual encounter over and over in his head. He tried to see the positive. But, he’d let his emotions control him and he had lost something he’d never get back.

The day went by with Newt reading, and at one point he didn’t feel as sore; he got up and cleaned part of his room until he heard his phone vibrate. Lighting up, the screen read ‘one new text message’, and Newt scampered over as fast as he could to swipe up the phone.

 

**Minho: goooood morning, Newt! I woke up chipper 2day**

 

Newt scooped up a pile of clothing on the floor, staring at the message that was filled with all different sorts of smiling emojis – nearing the twenty-emoticon mark. He knew the boy only added that many colourful text shapes to make him feel better, and he couldn’t help but let a smile creep onto his lips.

He took himself downstairs to put the clothes in the washing machine and hauled himself up onto the top, groaning loudly at the pain when he sat. Newt’s fingers ran over the keyboard, quickly typing out a reply.

 

**Newt: cant say the same for me. I ache all over but im glad you’re well :)**

**Minho: aww nothing a good massage couldn’t fix. Want me 2 help u out?**

The surprisingly fast reply meant Newt had to pause and think about what to respond. Was Minho serious or was this another ploy to get him to laugh like he knew he would? But if it was a real offer… _I shouldn’t_ , he thought to himself, biting his lip. Nevertheless, his fingers began to type a different answer as he remembered he had agreed to give Minho a shot… even if it was only to get over Thomas.

 

**Newt: yeah sure :):):)**

 

Kicking the washing machine to start it, the appliance rumbled and the blond hopped off the top. Shuffling back upstairs, he returned to his room and decided to change into some comfort clothes: baggy sweatpants and an oversized t-shirt he found at the bottom of his draw. He felt warm and lay back on his mattress, curling in to a ball.

As soon as he started to drift off for a nap, a knock at the door came and when no one answered it, he knew his parents had set off as he was falling asleep. Newt yawned a little and took a deep breath before making his way downstairs to the entrance. His fingers danced on the door handle for a while, grinding his teeth together in anxiety until he finally mustered the courage to open it.

Minho stood there, leaning on one of the porch pillars that held up the roof outside Newt’s window. He had his back facing the blond until he heard the door open, turning his head to smile at him. His raven-black hair was now styled into its usual style compared to what he’d seen yesterday, but Newt’s eyes travelled to the beautiful bouquet he was holding in his hands. The petals were vibrant and cheerful – they reminded Newt a lot of Minho’s personality.

Biting the inside of his cheek, Newt removed his gaze from the flowers in the boy’s hands and instead watched as Minho ran a hand over the back of his neck. He thrust the bouquet forwards and approached the door, chuckling a little to himself.

“Gerbera Daisies. They’re for your mom.” Minho smiled, hands sliding into his pockets as Newt accepted the flowers.

“I don’t know if she’ll see them. Mum and Steve set off on their honeymoon just a little while ago actually.”

“It’s the thought that counts.”

Newt nodded and found himself grinning back, stepping aside to let Minho enter. The jock never let the beam off his face, following him in graciously before taking off his shoes to be polite.

Taking a vase from the kitchen cupboard, the blond filled it with water and placed the flowers inside it on the kitchen table before walking to the fridge. He grabbed two cans of soda and pointed towards the stairs using his head, encouraging Minho to follow him up to his room… in the most innocent way possible.

Minho followed suit as they entered Newt’s room, door closing behind them. Despite his attempt at cleaning earlier, his room was still a bit of a mess and Newt pursed his lips, cheeks going red before handing a can to Minho.

“Sorry about the mess… this is kind of mid-tidy. I didn’t have much time to finish since coming back from… uh…”

With a grin still plastered to his face that Newt thought he could never get tired of, Minho chuckled and accepted the drink. “It’s fine, Newt.”

“Why are you smiling like that?” The blond queried, showing the boy’s arm playfully before he winced and made his way to sit on the bed.

“I’m a happy guy,” With a shrug, Minho sat beside him and nudged Newt with his shoulder. “Even more so with you agreeing to go on a date with me.”

Mid-sip, Newt swallowed too fast at the word ‘date’ and coughed a little, earning a pat on his back and concerned look from the Asian beside him.

“Too hasty in using that term?” Minho picked up and Newt nodded, putting the drink aside. “Got it – no labels.”

He appreciated Minho’s understanding and lay back on the bed, staring up at the ceiling until the boy’s face hovered over him. Newt’s eyes darted around his face, a weird nervousness in his stomach.

“Do you want that massage I promised?”

“You were serious about that?”

With a nod, Minho raised an eyebrow and smirked, moving out of Newt’s direct eye line to his peripheral vision. He sat back up slowly and saw that the jock had taken a tiny bottle out of his pocket that said something in Korean he presumed read ‘massage’.

“I trust you,” Newt tried to joke, corner of his mouth curled up as he rubbed the back of his neck and eventually removed his top. It worked because Minho’s body moved with his laugh and he instructed the blond to lie on his front on the mattress.

Newt did as he was told and shifted onto his front, propping his head up with a pillow under his chin, heart beating oddly fast. His heart quickened however when he felt a weight on top of him that could only have been Minho straddling his lower half to reach more of his bare back. Newt swallowed and pushed away the memories of when Thomas had tried to give him a massage a few months back.

“Is this okay?” Minho asked, interrupting his thoughts, causing the blond to turn his head to the right and hum in signal that it was. He then buried his head into the pillow.

The cool temperature of the oil on his bare skin made Newt arch his back slightly, and the Asian once again asked if he was okay as he began to rub circles into the knots in Newt’s back.

“Y-yeah,” he croaked, Minho’s soft, soothing touch making Newt already relax and feel slightly drowsy once more.

Minho did a thing with his thumb at the top of Newt’s spine and the blond let out a mix of a moan and a sigh, flushing red in embarrassment when he heard himself.

“That good?”

Once again, Newt just nodded and listened to Minho chuckle and work his hands down the middle of his back. He tried to get rid of any knots or tight spots until the touch turned into a patting action with the side of his hands lightly.

The action was so relaxing that Newt began to believe that he could just drift off and forget what happened Saturday evening, eyes drooping. He could’ve stayed like that forever, aching muscles being massaged to take his mind off other aching muscles.

When he felt a hot breath against the back of his neck followed by the feel of lips on his skin, Newt’s eyes flew open. The kiss was so light he would’ve missed it if he had been any further in falling asleep, but it was real enough that his head jerked up and looked behind him.

Brown eyes, but not the cheerful, optimistic eyes he was ready to see. Chestnut eyes. Doe eyes. Eyes that made the butterflies in his stomach spring to life as he stared into them for just a split second.

Thomas sat where Minho should’ve been, face so close to his, lips lightly brushing the skin of his neck as fine hairs there stood on end.

With a slight yelp, Newt sat up in surprise; Minho toppled backwards off of Newt as the blond turned to sit against the headboard, rubbing his eyes a little to see that it wasn’t in fact Thomas giving him the massage. _Of course it wasn’t, idiot_ , Newt thought, _he ran from you._

“I think you got it all. I feel a lot better, thanks.” Newt smiled quickly and reached for his shirt, trying to avoid the confusion on Minho’s face. “Sorry, Minho.”

Like it was just a passing wind, Minho’s expression changed and he brushed it off by waving a hand. “It’s all right, I went too far. Should’ve asked before I did that…”

Swallowing, Newt hesitantly leant forward, pausing just centimetres from Minho’s face for a second to observe it before he pressed a soft kiss to his lips. Surprised by the action, Minho raised his eyebrows but kissed back immediately, not pushing Newt to move any faster despite them having gone all the way.

As they kissed for a little while, just the sound of a few cars outside and their lips moving against one another audible, Newt felt like he was cheating on Thomas with the way his heart raced and a small fire lit in his stomach. But he wasn’t cheating – Thomas didn’t want him and that caused him to kiss the boy harder.

They parted lips to switch head positions, and Newt fluttered his eyes open for a second to see that the sight before him was once again not whom he thought he was kissing, but who he wished he was.

Thomas placed a hand on Newt’s cheek and the blond settled closer to him, hands on the bed for support as he leaned in further. He wanted to kiss him so much more, engulf himself in the moment with Thomas’ lips, his taste, and his tongue. He could feel Thomas smiling against his lips.

Not Thomas, Newt screwed his eyes shut, _Minho_.

Feeling Minho hesitate on his further movement, Newt felt for Minho’s hand before taking it in his own, placing it on his waist. The other found the back of his neck instinctively and they moved into a more comfortable position than before.

Minho sighed against his mouth and Newt immediately felt the jock’s change in attitude, suddenly more willing to take control of the situation. The blond didn’t mind, it was a great distraction and he liked kissing Minho – he was good at it. Not that Newt had that much experience in that area.

Shyly parting his lips at the feel of a tongue teasing his bottom lip, Newt let Minho deepen the kiss and inhaled a gasp when their tongues touched. They had kissed with tongue the previous night, but it had been fast and messy and Newt didn’t remember much of it if he was completely honest.

The blond moved a hand slowly up to the back of Minho’s head, fingers lacing in what he thought was his jet-black, gelled hair. Instead he found soft, shaggy-feeling locks that he knew belonged to Thomas. He couldn’t fight it anymore, mind giving into his fantasies in the moment. His hand clenched the brown locks and tried to reciprocate the movements the brunet was doing with his tongue.

Newt laid down on the bed and pulled Thomas along with him so he was hovering over him, kisses increasing in intensity as their mouths played and couldn’t stop exploring one another. Newt wanted to taste every inch of the brunet, ignoring the pain in his lower half as their legs tangled together messily.

Thomas’ tongue ran along the top of Newt’s mouth, eliciting a stifled moan from him at the action, and a smile formed on his mouth as he pulled away and then reattached their lips. His hands grasped at Thomas’ cheeks, holding him so close until the brunet pulled away just slightly.

“Easy, tiger.” Minho’s voice flowed out of Thomas’ perfectly sculpted face, moles dotted on his skin like constellations in the sky that Newt wanted to explore and study for years and years.

This could really work, Newt thought as he smiled at the interchanging sight of Minho and Thomas before capturing his lips for another kiss. Minho’s hand caressed the blond’s cheek so tenderly that his heart beat impossibly faster. He re-opened his eyes when his hand moved down from the boy’s hair to his back and he glimpsed another sight of the doe eyed brunet above him, smirking down like he knew exactly what he was doing.

This caused Newt to push Minho’s chest in shock, the boy sitting back from the blond. He swallowed down the feelings in his stomach and focused as hard as he could on the real sight before him: beautiful Minho who liked him as more than a friend, who cared about how he felt at every second and whose smile infected even the deepest, most depressed part of his body.

He realised he could never move on from Thomas if he kept thinking about him and kept backing off. With that, Newt looped himself around the jock’s body and flipped them, Minho’s face shocked at the action. The Brit sat straddling his legs and flushed.

“Too much?” He asked as if yesterday they hadn’t been fucking.

Minho shook his head quickly, a smile tearing at his lips as Newt closed the distance and kissed him again, this time much more gentle and sweet. His hands still scrunched into his shirt as Newt realised how weird it was that earlier he hadn’t wanted to do much with Minho until he was ready, but now his body was responding to each and every single one of the boy’s touches.

The way Minho feathered kisses along Newt’s jaw, supporting his position on his elbows made him feel all fuzzy inside, something he hadn’t encountered before. Everything was so affectionate, careful and caring as if they’d been doing this for months, and like if Minho did anything wrong then Newt would shatter like glass.

A shaky breath escaped his throat, everything so different from the raging, hot atmosphere of the previous night. It was so seemingly innocent, and as the blond pulled away to stare at the boy beneath him, he realised he really wanted this to work.

Minho opened his eyes, lashes sticking to his tan skin at first before he grinned and leant forward for one last kiss on his neck. His lips lingered there and he whispered, “I got you.”

 

_“I got you, Newt! I got you!”_

 

After a hard swallow as Newt pushed away childish memories, he pulled Minho up and moved to sit on his lap, pressing their chests together. He sat slightly higher than the jock and had to lean down to embrace him with his lips one final time, fingertips delicately touching his jaw as their mouth moved together. Neither of them heard the buzzing of Newt’s phone end or rustling of the tree being climbed outside.

“Newt, I tried calling for you to open the door but I— Oh my _god!_ Newt?” Brenda opened the window to her stepbrother’s room, trying to make her way inside when she fell in at the sight before her. She put a hand over her eyes whilst standing up, but did a double take when she realised that the person the blond had been kissing wasn’t Thomas. “ _Minho?_ ”

Newt’s fingers uncurled from the jock’s shirt and he sat back, cheeks and ears flushing a bright red. On the other hand, Minho raised two fingers to his forehead and saluted her in a greeting.

“Heeeeeey, Brenda.”

“What the fuck is he doing in your room?” The brunette stood aghast as she spoke to Newt, her tone not harsh despite her language. “And why were you making out with him?”

Raising a hand to the back of his neck, the blond ran it over the skin there that burned hot and he looked at Minho, whose eyebrows were raised in anticipation of what he was going to say. His gaze then travelled back to his stepsister who was tapping her foot, arms folded across her chest, long hair tied back into a messy ponytail and bag lying on the floor.

“We, uh,” Newt chewed on the inside of his cheek, stomach feeling uneasy as he spoke the next few words, “we’re… seeing each other?”

“What?” She said in disbelief. “Like dating? But I thought you were with—?”

Minho cut her off, aware of how uncomfortable Newt was at that moment, a look in his eyes prompting the jock to speak. “Dating isn’t the word we’re using right now. But he’s with me now.”

Brenda blinked a few times in surprise at Minho’s _caring_ side? He was always such a big figure at school, and now that she thought about it, she had never heard of Minho being in a relationship with anyone other than one night stands — so what was he doing “seeing” Newt?

“Well, er, that’s… nice?” She shot a confused look a Newt who just shrugged, leaning into Minho to avoid making eye contact. The Asian curled a soft hand around his shoulder for comfort as Brenda took one final look at them before grabbing her stuff and leaving.

Biting his lip, Newt let out a deep breath through his nose and Minho turned to look at him. “That was awkward. Hey? Are you nervous about something?”

All the thoughts that crossed the blond’s mind at that moment centered around whether Brenda would tell anyone about what she had just stumbled upon. He didn’t know if he wanted anyone knowing yet… let alone a certain doe-eyed brunet.

A guilty look was plastered on his face as Newt turned towards Minho. “I just don’t think I’m ready to go… what’s the word… _public_ with _this._ ”

His finger pointed between the two of them and he saw Minho nodding. God, he really needed to stop doing this to the poor boy.

“Sure, yeah. I understand. Figure out the boundaries and all of that and then we can decide where we want to go from there. It did just happen all of a sudden out of nowhere.”

Newt could hear something in the jock’s voice that made him feel sad but he nodded, going along with Minho’s reasoning. “Yeah, that’s exactly what I thought.”

Large muscled arms embraced Newt’s slender frame in a hug and the overwhelming feeling of him using the jock flooded his body again. He kept forgetting that Minho was Minho and he had feelings too — feelings he had confessed to the blond and that he wanted to reciprocate, but just couldn’t yet. He just needed to keep whatever it was this was. Newt realised that he was acting just like Thomas.

“I should probably get out of here,” Minho slid out of his grasp, “but that was fun. We should do that again soon.”

A quick kiss to the side of Newt’s head and the boy was jumping up from the mattress, stretching upwards. The blond bit his lip at the sight of Minho’s lower back in front of his eyes, causing him to stand and stutter out a goodbye.

Minho grinned and winked at Newt, going to slap his ass but not following through as he remembered that the Brit was still mostly sore from the previous night. So, instead he grabbed the stuff he had brought with him, downed the soda can and walked backwards out of the bedroom door.

A huge sigh left Newt’s lips when he heard the front door close, signaling Minho’s departure. He flopped onto his bed and ran his hands over his face a few times, mouth quirking up at the thought of someone caring about him in a more-than-friends type of way.

“Wanna tell me why you’re suddenly seeing the most popular and hottest guy in school?” Newt sat up at Brenda’s voice as she appeared in the doorway to his room. “A real reason please.”

Rolling his eyes, Newt folded his arms. “Why do you care?”

Brenda raised a perfectly plucked eyebrow and walked further into his room, settling herself on Newt’s bed. “Because we’re siblings now and this is kind of out of the blue.”

“Me and Thomas broke up so I moved on. But he doesn’t know, so please…” Newt took a deep breath, his heart feeling heavy, “keep what you just saw a secret, okay? You need to promise!”

It was the brunette’s turn now to roll her eyes, but she nodded and embraced Newt in a quick hug. “If that’s what you want, then okay.”

He hugged her back, relief washing over him. “Thank you.”

They exchanged a few words in regards of what they wanted for dinner that evening (both settled on pizza, duh) and Brenda left the room, leaving Newt to have the rest of the day to himself.

Their pizza arrived later that day and he grabbed a plateful to take up to his room, deciding to neglect his homework due tomorrow for the first time. With his food and drink in hand he ascended the stairs to climb out of his window and sit on the roof outside his room.

It was only seven in the evening and the sky was already darkening as he placed his crockery beside him to hug his knees, the wind chilly. But instead of venturing back inside, Newt pulled out his phone from his pocket and opened his photos, immediately grinning at the images that popped up.

He smiled sadly as he pressed the first photo in his camera roll, the image enlarging to show a picture of him and Thomas going rock climbing back for Thomas’ eleventh birthday. They had gone to the leisure centre but afterwards believed they could climb any rock in the world without a harness, so stupidly Newt had climbed a rock after Thomas (always following him) and had fallen, breaking his leg. He still had to suffer with a slight limp in his right leg ever since, remembering when Thomas had been worried sick for him as he lay in hospital.

Memories captured in the photos flashed before his eyes: Newt’s Christmas at the Murphy household, Thomas’ sixteenth, swimming lessons and random photos of them goofing around together. It was all so bittersweet, thinking about it now.

Newt had come to accept that he had been in love with Thomas since the moment they first met, but he wondered if he would have realised it as soon as he had if they hadn’t gone through the whole “faking it” charade.

A few more pictures passed under his swiping finger, noticing in a few pictures how close Newt seemed to be to Thomas. He held him tighter, smiled brighter and—

Locking his phone, Newt shoved the cell in his pocket. Out of sight, out of mind.

Eyes fell closed as he rubbed his face and hair. He was going to be with Minho now, whether he really wanted it or not. He wanted to like the jock back in that way, and he was going to really try.

Standing up from the roof – careful not to lose his balance – the blond made his way back inside to get ready for school the next day and bed. He changed his backpack and stacked his old one under the table, taking out his pencil case and books to shove into the rucksack he’d chosen. It was all a bit of a hurry as he did so and then changed into only his boxers before slipping under the covers.

His mother’s and Minho’s words from that day plagued his mind, not allowing him to fall asleep for what seemed like hours.

 

_Whatever you and Thomas did, you can make it up._

_I got you, Newt! I got you!_

_I got you._

**_You always do._ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so basically i was not expecting the reaction to the last chapter that it got. SO MANY OF YOU ARE OKAY WITH SEEING HOW MINHO AND NEWT'S RELATIONSHIP WILL EFFECT THE REST OF THE STORY AND THAT'S AWESOME THANK YOU FOR TRUSTING US WITH THIS AND DON'T WORRY, NEWTMAS ISN'T OVER IN SOME FORM OR ANOTHER.
> 
> thomas returns in the flesh in the next chapter, but i thought about a clever way to weave him in here would be to a) have another flashback and b) have newt see minho as thomas at some points to just show that he has to try harder to be over thomas. also it's kind of like a thominewt scene and i saw a few people in favour of that so ;-)
> 
> this chapter is just a continuation of the progress of minewt's relationship and how even though newt feels bad about using minho, he can't stop? thomas and him are made for each other those stupid fools
> 
> anyway, this is unbeta'd and the ending is really shoddy because it's 1am as im posting this and i may have to go back and edit, but i hope this chapter is a good enough read for you all! 
> 
> comments are our favourite thing so feel free to leave one below and thank you for reading!
> 
> rosie


	17. seventeen

Pulling the pillow over his head, Newt squeezed his eyes shut tighter to try and block out the honking from outside. It was then he realised that it was Monday, and this honking was his alarm to get up and out of bed because he had school. The thought of it made him feel queasy, but he forced himself to throw his legs over the side of the bed and make his way sleepily to the window.

Newt ran a hand through his bed-head and rubbed his eyes like a small child before he opened his window and peered down at his driveway. The sunlight made him wince, but once his eyes had adjusted, he was able to make out an unfamiliar car in the drive with a silhouette perched on its bonnet.

Blinking a few times, Newt made out Minho from his signature quiff and muscled arms crossed across his chest. He sighed and shook his head.

“What the bloody hell is he doing here?” Newt whispered to himself as he drew back and went to look at the clock.

Almost quarter-to-nine, he was already on track to be late. Newt ran to his shower and leapt in, washing himself of all the sweat and dirt that may have accumulated on him as fast as he could. He dried himself, grabbed at some clothes from the hamper and slipped them on as quickly; his backpack was thrown over his shoulder before Newt raced downstairs to pull on his shoes. All just as the door was knocked on.

Newt swallowed and stood up from where he had perched to slip into his footwear. As he walked to the door, he quickly glanced in the mirror to fix his awful haphazard mess that he called his hair and shouted, “Coming!”

Grasping the door handle, Newt pulled it open and was greeted with a wide, sunny smile from Minho, accompanied by a, “Good morning!”

“Why didn’t you tell me you were picking me up?” Newt readjusted the strap on his shoulder, rubbing his eyes again – he wasn’t fully awake.

“I wanted to be spontaneous.” Minho grinned sweetly, winking at him in a way that the blond couldn’t help but smile back at. “Is Brenda tagging along? I don’t mind giving her a lift if she needs.”

Shaking his head, Newt explained that Brenda usually wouldn’t be seen dead with him at school, even if they had sort of made up – she had to keep up her reputation after all. The Asian understood and offered out his hand to him, which Newt reluctantly took at first, but then relaxed at the touch.

His skin was cold against Minho’s warm hands, but he enjoyed the feeling of their fingers laced together. Although, as Newt stared down at their limbs, he realised that despite the fact his and the jock’s fingers curled nicely around one another, his and Thomas’ had fit perfectly.

His daydream was shortly cut off as Minho pulled Newt out of his house, toothy grin still plastered on his face as he led the blond to the car. He went to open the door for him, but Newt shook his head and grabbed the handle first, chuckling lightly as he slid in. Minho soon followed and put his seatbelt on before starting the car. Newt was glad he avoided a chivalrous moment, much like the ones he’d shared with…

Newt rubbed his face and yawned, placing his bag by his feet as the car backed up out of the driveway and started down the road towards the school. He smacked his lips a little, realising he had forgotten to eat breakfast and would be going without food until lunch that day. It didn’t help his already sleepy state.

“Tired? What, were you up all night thinking about me?” Minho joked, tapping his fingers on the steering wheel.

The blond threw a look at the raven-haired boy that tried to be a glare, but Minho’s remark was so ridiculous that he couldn’t help but chuckle. He could see how hard Minho was trying and he appreciated it, throwing his head back, laughing. “That was funny, Minho,”

The jock shrugged, corners of his mouth curled up. “I’m a funny guy. That’s probably why so many people like me and I’m on track to be named Class Clown for this years Yearbook.”

Newt shoved his arm playfully as they stopped at a red light. “You’re so full of yourself. You’re lucky you’re also so charming.”

A smirk formed on the athlete’s lips, eyes wrinkling at the corners. The sight of this caused Newt to bite the inside of his cheek, trying his hardest to hold back a smile. But, Minho threw him that knowing grin and Newt let go, scoffing and slapping him playfully once more as the car started again.

“Stop that.” Newt giggled, covering his mouth to hide the chortle.

“I didn’t even do anything!” Minho laughed, splaying out his fingers on the wheel as they drove, but continued to smile to himself, knowing he was putting Newt in a good mood.

Newt was sure he could keep this up: feeling happy whilst genuinely being himself. He didn’t want to nor needed to fake anything anymore; Thomas and Brenda and his mother all knew about his sexuality, and he would be fine as long as the world didn’t shove the brunet in front of him to torture him. Not any time soon, at least.

He wanted to be happy with Minho, grow to love him and accept that they were together. He wanted all the things he had felt for his best friend to just move over to the boy beside him, and how he wished it were that easy. His heart ached. He’d been through too much the past few weeks to suffer anymore.

As the car pulled to a stop a few streets down, Minho turned to Newt to smile softly at him. The blond smiled back, averting his gaze to his lap after a few seconds, not wanting to blush.

“Well, since I can’t do things with you at school just yet, I’ll see you later.” Minho leaned over to press a light kiss to Newt’s cheek. It was too soft, too gentle that it made Newt’s heart race.

“Y-yeah. See you.”

With a final squeeze to the top of the blond’s arm, Newt got out of the car and bit his lip as he began to walk towards the school grounds, pupils flooding in through the front entrance. He kept his head down, one hand gripping tightly at the strap of his backpack as he navigated his way into the building and to his locker.

The blond hoped that he didn’t run into Thomas before lessons, but his heart pounded against his chest, notifying him to just how much he missed the brunet. So much that it felt like the confession hadn’t happened.

Entering the combination to his locker, muttering the numbers ‘two-five-zero’ to himself, he opened it up and took a book out to shove into his bag. But as the book made its way out of its metal home, something fell out of the pages and floated down to land by his feet. He bent down carefully, breath slowing as he picked it up and saw what it was. Someone had evilly slipped a photo into his book, one of him and Thomas kissing that very first time back in the hall.

Newt held the picture in his hand, wanting to scrunch it up and chuck it. But he couldn’t do it. As he looked at the pair of them embracing, lips locked, his heart tightened in his chest and he had to take a deep breath to compose himself. It was all so simple back then, he thought as he put the picture back into his locker and closed it with a sigh.

If the photo wasn’t enough to ruin his morning, the person shuffling toward him across the hall was worse. Newt accidentally bit down on his tongue as he quivered, willing himself to start walking away but at the sight of his brunet, doe-eyed best friend, he just couldn’t. He was frozen to the spot, feeling all the colour drain from his face.

“Shit,” he whispered as the bell rang for first lesson and the corridor began to clear, leaving them practically alone. “Shit shit bloody fucking shit.”

Taking a deep breath as Thomas spotted him, he watched as the book in the boy’s hand fell to the floor. If it were any other time, Newt would have laughed at him, but as Thomas quickly picked it up, he stood frozen as well.

“Hey…” He heard Thomas say and… smile? The blond swallowed and took small breaths through his nose. He blinked, not able to speak, words catching in his throat. He hated this.

When Thomas started to walk towards him a few more steps from his locker, Newt nearly lost his balance.

“H-hey, Thomas.” He tried to say, his voice sounding weak to his own ears. He’d called him Thomas… Newt hated _himself_.

He thought that the time Thomas took approaching him lasted decades, but in reality was just a few seconds. Within no time, the brunet leaned back against the locker and shoved his hands in the pockets of his faded jeans. Newt noticed how his Adams apple bobbed as he swallowed.

“How are you?” Thomas asked and Newt could sense his nerves, ones that he had created.

He frowned before answering. He may have wanted to move on from the boy he knew he could never have, but he didn’t want to lose him for good. “I’m good, Thoma-Tommy. You?”

Thomas trailed his gaze up from the floor and licked his lips (in bad old habits, Newt followed the movement and inwardly cursed himself), nodding hesitantly.

“Yeah, yeah. I’m doing well, actually… Listen, Newt, I’m sorry for…” Newt felt himself tense up at the pause, finding it almost painful to hold eye contact with Thomas as he stammered and tried to find his words, “I’m sorry for leaving… a-again.”

Nodding numbly, Newt had no idea what to reply to him. He was about to turn around and head to class, but a jolt of what felt like an electric current alerted him to Thomas holding his arm, stopping him from walking away. The blond stared at the spot he was so tenderly touching before looking back up at Thomas… his Tommy.

The look in his eyes made Newt’s insides contort and twist, making him feel sick. He was so love-struck and Thomas was so… not. He was sorry, he could tell that, and there was something else behind those chestnut eyes that he couldn’t quite figure out.

“I’m sorry, Newt. I don’t want to make this…” Thomas trailed, chewing on the inside of his cheek, looking for the right word, “weird.”

Newt swallowed and the hand on his arm finally dropped back to his best friend’s side, followed by a gaze that hoped he was okay. With that, Newt forced a small smile and chuckled.

“You’re making it weird by saying we don’t have to make it weird.”

Trying his best not to show any more nervousness, Newt tried to keep his shuddering in embarrassment to a minimum. But every time his mind trailed to the night of the confession, he felt the same sick feeling growing in the pit of his stomach. Thomas licked his lips again and Newt wanted more than anything to hit him.

“I’m a crappy best friend.” Newt raised his eyebrows in shock at Thomas’ words. “How could I not see the way you felt—about me?”

Newt looked at his bag, stuffing the book he was still holding into it. “You’re not a crappy best friend.”

Sighing, Thomas rubbed his face and kept his hand running along his jawline. “I am though. I feel like a complete and utter jerk. The biggest jerk. I… couldn’t stop thinking about it the entire weekend. I didn’t get much sleep.”

“I sprang it on you…” Newt mumbled and looked back up at Thomas, “And I just, don’t want you to hate me.”

“I could never hate you, Newt!” Thomas furrowed his eyebrows, obviously taken aback. “You’re my fucking best friend in the world and that will never change. I love you, man…”

Newt flinched at those three words and Thomas swallowed, realising his mistake. He ran a hand through his hair a few times and winced.

“I-I mean… I love you, _platonically_.”

The feeling Newt had then was the equivalent to being hit by a bus. That was all the clarification he needed; Thomas would never love him back. Not now, not ever.

He forced another smile, closed his eyes and shook his head. “It’s okay…”

When he reopened them, he could’ve sworn he was Thomas’ lip quiver and eyes flicker upwards, hand running through his hair again – a nervous tick he often possessed.

“So, should we figure out what we do?” Thomas asked, earning a confused eyebrow raise from Newt.

“What do you mean?”

“Like, what stuff from before can we and can we not do. For example, can I still give you piggy backs?”

Newt shook his head, thinking about wrapping his arms tightly around Thomas’ neck and nuzzling into it as he carried him. Strictly off limits.

“Right, right,” Thomas rubbed his hands together, “can I still come round to play Xbox after school?”

Lips twitching into a small smile, Newt chuckled and nodded. “We should get to class.”

Pushing himself off his locker, Thomas soon followed and muttered, “Yeah.”

Newt already knew things had changed drastically and he blamed himself. He watched Thomas’ back as the brunet walked slightly ahead, hating himself for ever letting them become what they were now: empty shells of best friends that once were. He loved Thomas so much and he hated himself for it.

He hoped things would be all right again as time went by; he was with Minho now, and there wasn’t any excuse for him to love Thomas in that way anymore.

Falling into step beside Thomas, the boy smiled at Newt, warming his heart as they entered their science class extra late. The teacher didn’t even look up from her computer at the front, so they snuck their way in to the back of the class.

As the pair took their seats, one girl turned around and chewed her gum loudly. “Did you two fool around before class? Is that why you’re so late and flustered?”

Newt could’ve leaned across the desk and ripped off her fake eyelashes for saying that, but he didn’t respond as he pulled out his books and put them on the desk. What surprised him, however, was that Thomas didn’t deny her comment.

The girl frowned and turned back the front, clearly bored and annoyed that she didn’t provoke a reaction. Newt didn’t dare look at Thomas’ expression in that moment, instead he coughed and turned to the page in the book they needed. He drowned himself in the notes he was supposed to copy from the board.

 

* * *

 

 

The first two lessons passed fairly quickly when Newt lost himself in the work, and once it reached break time, both he and Thomas found their usual seat outside on the grass.

“I’m going to fail history, I can feel it in my bones.” Thomas said casually as the wind whipped by them.

Newt played with the bottom of his shirt, picking at the loose stitching there. “Still? Why? I could… tutor you if you want?”

“You’re naturally smart with historical facts, Newt. I’m just not. I try, I really do, but I just don’t take dates and obvious stuff in.”

Newt nodded, yeah, you sure don’t.

The brunet looked at Newt, seemingly deep in thought, considering Newt’s offer most likely. “Yeah, I’d love for you to teach me.”

Thomas really needed to stop using the ‘L’ word in front of him, he thought.

But with a nod of his head once more, Newt sighed. “Sure, I’d be happy to help you out.”

Sitting up from his sprawled out position on the grass, Thomas shuffled closer as Newt got out his history books.

“Look at you two studying together.” The blond looked up at the familiar voice, Minho approaching with a smile on his face before taking a seat. “What’s up, guys?”

Newt thought he detected something behind the tone Minho was talking in. Was that… jealousy? No, no, he was overreacting – they’d been together for a day and a bit. Yet, Minho was sitting very closely to him.

“Hey, Minho.” Thomas grinned at their friend, looking from Minho to Newt and back again, wondering if the boy knew what had gone on between them. The blond would’ve laughed if he didn’t feel so awkward—If only Thomas knew. “I’m failing history so Newt’s gonna teach me some stuff before class.”

“Stuff?” The jock coughed, voice teasing in a way Newt was sure he’d only pick up.

The brunet looked at Minho with a raised eyebrow and chuckled, “Yeah… stuff about the Roaring Twenties. I’m flunking badly.”

Newt found himself staring down at his books, not wanting to look at either of them for a moment. He tried not to blush, but incidentally felt his ears heating up, surely turning red.

Minho nodded beside him, tilting his head to the side. “You failing at other things too?”

His deadpan tone told Newt that he was subtly confronting the brunet about his failure to notice Newt’s feelings, and if Thomas wasn’t still an oblivious fool, he may hate noticed that.

“I’m failing at a few things, yeah.”

Minho scoffed in a friendly way (Newt didn’t know that was possible, but Minho managed it), “of course you are.”

Newt looked up once again and shoved the book he was holding into Thomas’ hands. “Uh, you read a page and I’ll ask you a few questions on it in a second. Then we’ll do some memory stuff.”

As Thomas chewed on his lip, he looked down at the page and began to read. Minho leaned in to Newt’s ear and chuckled, “Aren’t you bossy, Newt.”

Biting his lip, Newt elbowed his… _boyfriend_ lightly in the side, but just enough to hurt. His eyes watched Thomas scanning the page as he heard Minho exclaim “ow!” beside him.

The brunet looked up, “You okay, man?”

Minho nodded and Newt hid his smile, replying, “He’s fine, alright.”

Newt tried not to laugh and Thomas threw them a quizzical look before returning to his reading. The blond craned his neck to look at the jock and subtly nudged him once more when Thomas wasn’t looking. Minho responded with raised eyebrows and a shrug.

After about a minute, Thomas held the book out and announced he was ready for a few quick questions on the contents of the page. The drink Newt had begun sipping on almost spluttered out at the sudden declaration, causing him to cough before speaking.

“Good that.” He accepted the book and turned so that Thomas couldn’t see any of the information.

“Test me!”

Pursing his lips, Newt began asking a series of questions on prohibition and flappers and speakeasies, all as if they were back to their normal selves. Newt teased Thomas playfully whenever he got a question wrong and Thomas pouted.

“This is too hard! I swear I read that part, Newt.”

Newt smiled toothily at the boy, shoving the book into his bag. “It would help if you didn’t answer ‘Al Capone’ to every question, Tommy.”

“But then I’ll get at least one question right.”

Minho left when he spotted a group of his friends from one of the many sports teams he was in, and Newt noticed him almost leaning in to press a kiss to the side of his head, but restrained himself. Instead he used the blond’s shoulder to push himself up to stand, giving it an affectionate squeeze before he walked off and bid the boys farewell. He tried not to look too dazed as he watched Minho go, tearing his eyes away from his butt in the jeans he was wearing today.

“What’s gotten into him?” Thomas asked as he craned his neck to watch the boy leave also. Looking back at Thomas after a split second, he realised the brunet was now staring at him.

“I don’t know… maybe he’s stressed?” He offered as an explanation, knowing the true reason behind the athlete’s behaviour.

“I didn’t know Minho ever got stressed. He’s a jock – isn’t sport supposed to be a relief from stress?” Thomas muttered as he puffed out a breath. “Okay, test me again.”

Newt rolled his eyes at Thomas’ comment, “Of course jocks can get stressed.”

Asking Thomas more questions, Newt tried to give his best friend solutions as to ways to remember certain facts and dates in terms of making up a song to help him remember. To Thomas’ delight, he got more right than before.

Glad he wasn’t receiving a pity look from his best friend, or worse, one of disgust, Newt closed the book. He really hoped that with enough time they could fall back into their old habits and Newt could tell his best friend that he was in love with someone else when he got to that stage, and they could move on together.

“Okay, I’m good now. If I keep going over this as I walk to class, I think I could do well.”

Newt nodded reassuring the boy as they stood up that he would do just fine – that he had to be positive or he would definitely fail.

“Thanks, Newt.” Thomas placed his hand lightly on the blond’s shoulder, another electric shock running through his veins from the point of contact.

“Don’t mention it.” He managed to say without squeaking, the bell ringing in the distance making them dust themselves off and head back towards the building.

“See you after school, Newt.” Thomas said beside him as he made his way to the block where his next lesson was.

With a raise of his eyebrow, Newt shifted his backpack on his shoulder. “After school?”

Thomas nodded and smiled, “Yeah, I mean, if you’re up for it?”

“Yeah, sure, that’s great.” Newt let out a relieved sigh at how painless that had been, “Good luck in your test, Tommy!”

 

* * *

 

 

He sat through a few hours of lessons and a lunch break that he had opted to use to sit through an extra math class. By the time it reached the end of the day, Newt packed everything away in his bag and sauntered out of class, soon to find Minho striding beside him.

“Hey there,” Minho grinned, hands at his sides brushing Newt’s lightly. The blond gave him a small smile.

“How was class and practice?”

The jock cleared his throat and nodded, “Both were good, yeah. Basketball was today and we’re really becoming a unit, you know? Yourself?”

Newt nodded and said his classes were good too, both of them looking around as they walked amongst the students and out into the parking lot,

“What are you up to tonight?” The raven-haired boy asked as Newt headed for the exit to walk to the bus stop.

Forgetting Thomas had suggested they meet up after school, Newt shrugged. “Nothing, I think. You?”

Minho grinned, and as he opened his mouth to speak, they heard a voice calling out to them that interrupted him.

“Well, I fucking aced that test,” Thomas grinned so widely it was like the whole of Newt’s world became that little bit brighter, “but are we still on for revising tonight?”

Newt looked from Thomas, to Minho and back again, clearing his throat as he shuffled from foot to foot. “Um, yeah. Of course. I’m happy to help, Tommy.”

He could feel Minho’s gaze, but ignored it as Thomas flashed a smile at him. “Cool!”

What a puppy, Newt shook his head, subconsciously biting his lip without realising.

“You coming too, Minho?” The brunet prompted with a slap to the buffer boy’s arm, genuinely looking as if he wanted his friend to come along for old times sake.

The Asian shook his head, “I’ve got other plans, but you guys enjoy yourselves.”

Newt looked at him and smiled apologetically, but the boy nodded and mouthed ‘it’s fine’ with a smile. Thomas had already bounced towards his car, his mood extremely happy since he’d arrived.

“I’ll text you, okay?” Newt reached out to quickly squeeze Minho’s fingers, a tingling feeling running through his body.

“Yeah, you go have fun studying. Just remember you’re missing out on this,” Minho motioned to himself and started walking backwards away from him, a smirk plastered on his face that made Newt giggle and shake his head for the umpteenth time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> FIRST OF ALL I AM SO SORRY THIS CHAPTER CAME SO LATE, my co-writer wasn't able to write it so i had to take it on when i was least expecting it so i am so so _so_ sorry for the lateness when we promised quick updates.  
>  secondly, this chapter is very short and ends in a weird place compared to other chapters, but that's because it was enough of a chapter to upload to give you guys something as i write the other half that should be at the end, but will now be a separate chapter.  
> god, i feel so bad for leaving you guys without an update for two weeks -- if i'd known earlier of the situation then I would've started writing so much sooner, but it's here and the next chapter will be up either tomorrow or within the next three days.  
> also - in this chapter it seems as if they get over the awkwardness super easy. WRONG. you're going to have to wait to see where that progresses from now on :-)  
> once again guys, i can't apologise enough for the late update and the shortness of this chapter, i hope you can forgive me because you guys are so amazing and i don't ever want to disappoint you. thank you for being the best readers and commenters ever, and I really hope faster updates from BOTH AUTHORS can come in the future.  
> thank you so much for being so patient, i love you :-)
> 
> rosie


	18. eighteen

“I said it before and I’ll say it again,” Thomas started as soon as Newt slid into his car, shuffling awkwardly in his seat. “Minho’s acting really weird.”

Freezing in his spot, Newt swallowed and played with his fingers in his lap, tapping the buds of his fingertips against one another. “What do you mean by weird this time?”

“He’s been around us a lot today. It’s just… I don’t know. I like the guy a lot, he’s great, but he’s never hung out with us at school like that before.” Thomas shrugged off what he was saying and Newt turned away to put on his seatbelt, clicking it into place.

“People change…”

The words left Newt’s lips in what was barely a whisper, as if the wind were whistling by their ears and you could hear the faintest sound. If Thomas heard what he had said, he didn’t react as he turned the ignition and began to reverse out of his spot.

He wondered how Thomas would react if he told him about his current relationship – if he could call it that yet – with the lead athlete of their school. Where would he even begin to explain everything? Would he start with the kiss Thomas walked in on or that if the brunet hadn’t left him at the wedding, wounded and alone, drowning in his misery he would have never have slept with him… He used to call himself a Thomas expert, but as Newt thought through the situation, he honestly felt as if he didn’t know how the stranger beside him would respond.

Most of the drive toward Newt’s house was silent, the awkwardness of being trapped together not in a public space like school starting to hit them both. Newt subconsciously chewed on his bottom lip harder and heard the brunet scratching at the denim of his jeans, in between his hands running through his hair as he drove.

He hated the silence, and despite the voice in his head telling him not to, Newt closed his eyes, drew a breath and tried to think of something to talk about.

“So… tell me about the test you apparently aced.”

Turning his head towards him, Thomas bounced his knee (another nervous tick of his) and cleared his throat, quickly turning back to the road. “It was really, super good, Newt. I whizzed through the questions – and _whatdoyouknow_ , there was one on Al Capone himself. But, you’re a great teacher. Thanks.”

Newt smiled and didn’t even try to hide the faint blush that was dusting his cheekbones now. But either way, Thomas wasn’t looking, tapping his fingers on the steering wheel as they entered the blond’s neighbourhood.

“Thanks, Tommy. But you still need to study more so you won’t flunk for the final midterm.”

“Aye aye, Captain.”

Stopping at the end of the now Isaac-Despain driveway, the pair jumped out and Newt slammed the door shut as Thomas already began to jog to climb up the tree onto the roof. He came to a halt at the end of it, turning his head to his best friend, earning a raised eyebrow from the blond.

“Hey, Newt – do you want to try climbing up?”

With a scoff, Newt tilted his head to the side. “Are you kidding me?”

Thomas cracked a smile and threw his hands out. “Why not? I’ll stay down here and catch you if you fall!”

Oh the irony, Newt thought, wanting more than anything to ask the boy: “Why didn’t you catch me when I fell for _you_ , then?” Instead, with a lurch of his heart and a small grunt, he made his way forward towards the tree and observed the situation.

The tree was an old oak tree that had been growing outside the house since it was first built. With a thick trunk and jutting branches filled with endless amounts of leaves, it was sturdy and had taken the weight of Thomas Murphy on many a climb. So why now was Newt scared – he was lighter than him, but his previous stints with heights and accidents had given him a terrible case of nerves when climbing.

“Give me a leg up.” Newt announced, surprising both himself and Thomas, but the boy linked his long fingers together and bent down for him to step upon.

“Careful.” The brunet reiterated as Newt stepped onto his makeshift lift and was pushed up into the tree, grappling a branch with his hands. He looped his legs around the trunk and onto a branch like he had seen Thomas do so many times before, and once he had caught his balance – and his breath – he took a leaping step forward onto the shingle roof.

Peering over the edge as close to it as he dared, he observed his friend following close behind, looking far more graceful than he had been he was sure.

“See,” Thomas landed beside him and Newt felt him reach out to touch his shoulder to steady himself. “That wasn’t so hard, right?”

Although the brunet grinned, Newt sat down and pulled his legs up to his chest. “I am never doing that again.”

Dropping down beside him, Thomas chuckled and muttered teasingly, “Loser.”

They sat for a while, listening to the leaves rustling in the tree and the occasional passing car driving down the road. But it wasn’t a nice quiet, and Thomas let out a long breath before he spoke. “This is nice. Normal. I’m glad.”

Newt wrinkled his nose, unsure if Thomas felt as weird as he did, but he nodded, glancing at him with a replied sigh.

“It’s as normal as it can get I suppose.” Newt sat up a little to reach into his back pocket, pulling out his packet of cigarettes, looking down at them before he held them out to his friend. “You want one?”

Thomas hesitated for a second, but shook his head. With a shrug, Newt pulled out one of the cigarettes and lit it with the lighter he kept in the empty part of the box. As he took a drag, he stared ahead into the distance, failing to notice the brunet watching him intently. But as Newt turned his head to look at him again, Thomas had turned away.

He observed as the brunet shuffled uncomfortably, unsure if it was the uneasiness between them or the bumpy surface that was causing it. Looking away, it hurt him to realise that Thomas felt awkward under his gaze and he tapped the ash from the cigarette with his index finger.

“What else would you like to stu—?”

“Can we just sit here for a while?” Thomas interrupted the blond, lying back on the roof.

His words had startled Newt. “Oh? Um, sure, if that’s what you want.”

Thomas hummed the tune to an indecipherable song and closed his eyes, long lashes caressing the top of his freckled skin. Newt guiltily stared, stomach clenching. He wanted to tear his gaze from his ridiculously perfect face, but even as he took a final drag, blunted the cigarette and lay back beside him, he just couldn’t do it. Old habits die-hard, he started counting the moles that lined his face.

“Your glare burns hotter than the fucking sun, Newt.” Thomas said with a snort, opening his right eye a crack to observe the blond.

Finally, he swallowed and looked up at the sky, clasping his hands together on his stomach. “You wish I was staring at you…”

With that, Newt himself closed his eyes and let out a deep sigh, trying to push any and all thoughts of Thomas out of his mind to replace them with other things… like school and his bed and Minho…

Nose scrunching, he realised he probably shouldn’t have put the words ‘bed’ and ‘Minho’ in the same sentence and—

“Where have you been looking at colleges?”

Newt’s eyes sprung open – that was definitely a different thought subject – and he bit his lip. He had been so focused on Thomas this past semester that he hadn’t even thought about where he wanted to go to college after he graduated at the end of the year.

He hadn’t given his future much thought; he’d always just seen himself being by Thomas’ side for the rest of his life. He’d always imagined them going to the same university, living in the same dorm, dealing with college hardships and highlights together. He still did, he just hadn’t looked a where… and if that was even a possibility anymore.

“I’ve, uh, been looking at Brown.” Thomas turned his head to Newt, their faces really only a few inches from one another.

“Brown? Wow…”

“Yeah, wow… It’s Ivy League, I know, but I think if I work hard,” Thomas placed his hands behind his head, “I may actually stand a chance of getting in.”

Newt’s eyes sparkled as he watched a small dimple appear on the boy’s cheek. “Oh, Tommy. You definitely have a chance.”

Thomas beamed at him, and Newt felt the same breathless feeling he always got when the boy gave him that look.

“What about you?”

Swallowing, he opened his mouth to reply, but turned away at the question and shrugged. “I-I don’t know… I haven’t thought that far ahead.”

“You? Not thinking about the future? Imposter—what have you done with Newt?”

The blond nudged the boy with his elbow and looked back at him. Trying to hide his insecurity about the situation, he smiled smugly. “I’m pretty smart though, so any college will take me.”

Thomas’ face spread into a wide grin, teeth and all. God, he thought, you really don’t know how stunning you are. He couldn’t help but smile back, insides burning with the want to kiss him.

“That’s true. Any of the Ivy League colleges would have you.”

Newt laughed, because if he didn’t then his face would burn red with a fierce blush and he didn’t want any more of that around Thomas if he could help it. “Thanks, Tommy. Really”

Still smiling, Thomas shrugged and sat, stretching quickly before he let his limbs slink back to his sides, “Don’t mention it.”

The blond was on the verge of sitting up himself when he heard Thomas mutter so quietly, he could’ve missed it.

“I miss this. I missed the feeling of my buddy beside me and I know that sounds stupid but two days of not talking to you was… torture.”

Pushing down the knot in his stomach and the thumping of his heart ringing in his ears, Newt didn’t know what to say, so he clamped his lips shut. He didn’t want to say anything else he would regret.

“And you climbed up your tree… You know, today has been good.”

“I’m never doing it again though,” he managed to say without sounding too croaky, moving to stand up and make his way towards the window. “I’m going inside to get a drink – do you want anything?”

Thomas ran his hand through his hair as he looked up at the boy, licking his lips. “I’ll have whatever you’re having,”

With a nod, Newt climbed through his window and finally managed to take a proper breath as he raced down the stairs to the kitchen. He threw open the fridge and pulled out the final coke can, deciding that he would give it to Thomas because the brunet loved that soda the most. He poured himself a glass of orange juice before heading back upstairs.

When he entered his bedroom, Newt expected that he would have to return to the roof, but to his surprise he found Thomas standing by his bedside table. He was looking at the pictures he had on it, most of the photos being of the two of them together.

“Hey there.” Newt blushed, approaching the brunet; hand outstretched to hand Thomas the coke. “What are you doing?”

Thomas accepted the beverage and put down the picture frame. Newt could now see that it was the one of him on the roller coaster at _Six Flags_.

“My face is a bloody mess there.” Newt crouched down slightly to observe it more, as if he hadn’t seen it a thousand times before. He chuckled at the sight of them, Newt’s eyes screwed shut and mouth wide open in a scream as Thomas laughed and threw his hands up high in the air for the camera. “Good times.”

“Nah, you’re adorable in that one.” Thomas smirked, taking a sip of coke as he sat down on the edge of the blond’s bed.

Newt followed suit and sat beside his friend, though the space between them was fairly obvious and significant. “What do you want to do now?”

He watched as Thomas turned to face him, looking from his lips to his eyes. A smile was still present, corners of his mouth turned up. “Xbox?”

Nodding, the blond smiled and went to grab the controllers by his TV, bending down to set up the console.

“Let’s play FIFA. I haven’t played it in so long.” The brunet shuffled from the bed to sit on the floor. FIFA had always been their thing rather than Call of Duty or any other multiplayer game – they’d played it since they were young and they’d never gotten out of the habit.

“Anything for you, Tommy…” Newt teased, until he realised what he said and coughed to clear his throat. He sifted through the various games, pulling out the disc to put into the console. As the disk slid into the machine, he let out a sigh and muttered, “Anything for you.”

The TV came to life with the press of a button, and he dashed downstairs to get snacks, returning quickly so they could get started on their FIFA marathon.

As if nothing had changed, the pair played the game for four hours straight, the occasional chip being thrown at one another if a foul or free kick took place. It was simple, straightforward and just what he Newt needed to take his mind of the complications of their relationship.

By the time Newt’s ass started to ache from sitting on the floor for hours, he set the controller down at the end of a match he had won and stood up to stretch. “Oh, hell.”

“You okay there?” Thomas said over a final mouthful of salt and vinegar crisps, looking up at his friend.

“Yeah, I just—Christ, is that the time?” Newt saw the clock on his table that read nine in the evening and rubbed his eyes with a groan. Thomas pulled his knees up to his chest.

He had forgotten to text Minho like he had promised, cursing as he pulled out his phone from his bag. He found four messages waiting for him from an hour or two ago. Biting his lip, he dialled the boy’s number and ran a hand through his hair as Thomas disappeared into the bathroom.

After three rings, Minho picked up and with a chuckle said, “I thought you weren’t going to call.”

“Hey, Min. I’m sorry I didn’t text you like I said,” Newt stepped around the mess on the floor, bending down to pick up the empty bowls and glasses to wash up later. “I lost track of time.”

Rubbing the back of his neck, he heard another laugh down the end of the phone. “It’s okay, I’m not an overprotective girlfriend, I just asked because I like to hear how you’re doing. And, I just thought maybe I’d check up on you to ask if you wanted to do something on Saturday? If you’re not, uh, busy—with Thomas or something.”

Newt thought about it. Being with Minho was one thing, but going on actual dates as a couple? He wasn’t sure… but remembering everything he’d been though, he realised a date was nothing compared to it.

“Okay, yeah. That sounds amazing.”

“Awesome,” the excitement was evident in the jock’s voice. “I’ll pick you up around eleven?”

Newt frowned, looking to the bathroom, wondering what was taking Thomas so long. “You already have something planned out? Where are you taking me?”

“That’s a surprise.”

With a roll of his eyes at how cliché this all was, Newt found himself smiling anyway. “A surprise? Well, I’m looking forward to it.”

Then, as if on cue, Thomas re-entered the room and fell back on the bed.

“I have to go. See you later.” Newt quickly bid Minho farewell before hanging up, shoving the phone in his pocket alongside his cigarettes.

“Who was that?” The brunet asked, sitting back up to gather his things from the floor, placing them on his lap.

Chewing on the inside of his cheek, Newt brought a hand up to the back of his neck. “No one.”

A small side smile and squint accompanied by a laugh left Thomas’ mouth. He shook his head, “Well, it obviously was someone or you were speaking to an imaginary friend.”

“No, I mean, yeah I was speaking with someone,” Newt walked over to the window, opening it for his friend to make his exit. “But it was no one you should know…”

Thomas zipped up his bag and threw the strap over his shoulder, walking over to him with narrowed eyed. “Please, I’ll find out who.”

The pair were ridiculously close and Newt forced down a breath as he racked his brain for an excuse, “It was Zart from the yearbook committee. I told him I’d join the team this year.”

He wasn’t sure he’d lied all that well, but it was apparently convincingly nonetheless as Thomas nodded slowly, face softening. His features returned to their carefree, beautiful state. If Newt had to use the word flawless on something, he reckoned the closest he’d get would be Thomas’ appearance.

“Okay then. Well, I guess I’ll see you tomorrow.” The brunet said, a quick flash of something appearing across his face before he was out of the window and making his way towards the tree they had climbed together.

“Good night, Tommy!” Newt called from his room and turned away from the window, not watching him leave like he usually did. He tore himself away to get ready for bed.

The yearbook lie wasn’t exactly a complete lie on his behalf; Zart had approached him during an extra maths session, asking if he wanted to help them out but he hadn’t confirmed the offer. He knew that if he weren’t popular, they wouldn’t have noticed him, much less ask for his help. But it was enough of a lie to keep Thomas from asking about mystery phone calls for a while.

Newt washed his face, brushed his teeth and changed into just his boxers, turning off the light before slipping under his covers. He hugged the spare pillow to his chest and nuzzled into it as if he were spooning with a certain someone. The subconscious smile on his face didn’t fade as he fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aaaaand here's the rest of the chapter (new chapter whatever) as promised :-) yay i finally kept a promise. i need to make this work!  
> more thomas in this part also as promised and aw maybe things won't be so bad between them after all. thomas just wants to be friends and newt does too, but it's not that easy unfortunately.  
> thomas was acting more like the jealous girlfriend in this part? hmm.. whatever, i'm sure it's nothing.
> 
> i hope the last two chapters/updates are enough to keep you guys going for a while as i do homework over summer and a big project thing, but i'll try and update as much as possible - hopefully another one within the week so i can work on rounding this thing up and getting to the good ending!  
> lots more in store for you guys. i love you, thank you for reading and don't forget to comment on the last two chapters because i love comments so much eee :-)
> 
> rosie


	19. nineteen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter dedicated to my amazing friend, maartje who keeps me motivated by spamming my twitter dm's for new chapters. i hope this one keeps you going for a while! (◕‿◕✿)

“Hello?” Newt spoke into his phone after waking up from its constant buzzing. His voice was groggy from sleep and the room was barely in focus as he was bundled in the bed sheets in the darkness of the room. He had seen Minho’s contact on the screen as he pressed answer and pulled the phone to his ear.

“Morning, sunshine.” The boy replied in a cheerful tone, as if he was already on his eighth coffee of the day.

Newt groaned and buried his head into his pillow. “ _Minho…_ ”

“I like it when you say my name like that.” The teasing tone amid the laugh he heard down the line caused Newt to sigh, sit up slowly and rub his eyes as he began to wake up properly. “Do you want me to pick you up today?”

“No spontaneity? I’m disappointed after yesterday…” Newt turned his head to yawn and read the clock on his nightstand. It was still only six-twenty-four in the morning; half an hour before he would usually get up. “You woke me up at six a.m., so why bloody not.”

“Ah, sorry about that. Early riser, and I got a little too excited to see you again.” Newt’s heart swelled in his chest and he wriggled his toes under the blanket.

“Yeah, well you won’t be happy to see this face until it’s been in the shower and freshened up from my current state. See you in forty?”

“Make it thirty – I’ll bring breakfast and we can take a detour. Now, go shower.”

The phone went dead and the blond stopped the call, throwing his phone aside as he made his way to the bathroom and chuckled. “Doofus.”

Exactly thirty minutes later (to the dot!), Newt heard Minho’s car roll up in front of his house as he did his hair in the mirror. He had decided to use the tiny morsel of gel he had left, messing up his fringe in a way that didn’t look as if he hadn’t even tried to look nice. But, he soon stumbled to the window, checking to make sure it was indeed the runner, and he was right; leaning on the open car door with a cup of coffee in his hand and a paper bag.

With a small wave down at him, Minho beamed up and saluted him with two fingers, holding up the paper bag with his other hand. The blond found himself smiling back and grabbed his things, running past Brenda as she went to use the shower and down the stairs to join him.

“Hey!” Minho greeted as Newt made his way outside, receiving his coffee and breakfast from the jock.

“Hey, Minho. Thank you for this – although it doesn’t make up for the fact you woke me up so early!” Newt took a sip of the boiling drink as Minho ran his hand through his quiff and shrugged. Slender fingers placed the cup on the bonnet of the car and opened the bag.

“Yeah, I didn’t know exactly what to get you, but I figured croissants were a win-win.”

Newt pulled out the pastry as the tanned boy ran a hand over his neck. “I love croissants.”

He thought he heard a breath of relief from the jock as he took a bite, humming in delight at the taste of the food. He chewed on it and closed his eyes, swaying as the buttery goodness of the pastry made his taste buds tingle. When his eyelids were reopened, he quickly saw Minho lean forward and a warm kiss was quickly pressed to his moving, bulging cheek.

Newt swallowed and blushed when the athlete turned around to grab his own food, tearing off a bit of his breakfast muffin, only to throw it into his mouth on the first try. He let out a triumphant laugh, causing the blond to shake his head and giggle. The gap between them closed and Newt pressed a kiss to Minho’s lips, pulling away after about three seconds to walk around to the passenger’s side of the car.

Sliding in, Minho followed soon after with a flustered look on his face, turning the key to the ignition. He placed a bit of his food in his mouth and chewed as the car reversed out of his drive.

“I’ll stop a little way from the school again,” Minho nodded as he looked over his shoulder for the manoeuvre and then drove down the road. Newt gazed at the side of Minho’s near-perfect face. The boy would never realise how much he appreciated him respecting Newt’s wishes to not go public about anything until he was ready… if ever.

Shuffling in his seat, Newt slowly moved to hold Minho’s hand that was on his thigh. “Minho, thanks – truly… and I-I’m sorry too.”

Minho shook his head and batted away the notion, smiling at the road. The blond only pulled his hand away when the jock needed to change gear and use the joystick, twiddling his thumbs in his lap once his breakfast was done.

They took the scenic, longer route to the school due to their earliness and parked two streets down under a huge chestnut tree. Minho got to talking about how excited he was to improve with his sports teams, and Newt listened, nodding intently. He was still amazed that someone who came across as arrogant and big-headed because he was the most popular guy in school, actually turned out to be one of the sweetest people he knew. He was a great friend.

When the clock in the car told them that it was ten minutes before the start of school, Newt looked across and smiled at the boy, only to receive one back that was so big, his dimples showed. He slipped out of the vehicle and threw his bag over his shoulder, looking out to see if anyone noticed he’d arrived in Minho’s car (they hadn’t) before starting down the road to school.

Crossing the street to enter the grounds of the school, Newt looked around at his fellow peers; people no longer stared at him as much as they used to back when he and Thomas ‘came out’. Students were still very friendly to him, and though half the time he didn’t know whom someone was, he smiled and waved back at anyone that initiated the gesture.

Newt went to his locker and felt someone brush past him to go to class. Looking over his shoulder he spotted that it was Minho with his friends, and the Asian looked quickly over at him before disappearing into his room. He smiled lightly at him, until a clang on the locker made him jump and turn around, bringing him face-to-face with Thomas.

“’Sup, buddy?” Thomas asked, grinning unusually big this morning.

“You okay there?” Newt raised an eyebrow, pulling out his books, careful not to knock the photo of them off the shelf. When the brunet shook his head, Newt stopped and tilted his own head to the side, closing the metal door. “What’s wrong, Tommy?”

“I don’t know… I just feel super excited for no reason.” The quick response came as Thomas looked around at the moving students.

“Well, at least it’s a good feeling… I was worried something had happened to you.” A smile pulled at the corner of Newt’s mouth.

“Nah.” Thomas clapped Newt’s shoulder, before leading him away from his locker and into the middle of the hall. The touch on the blond’s shoulder sent shivers down his spine and he snuck a look at the long fingers, curled around his shoulder blades comfortably. “Hey, uh, where can I sign up for that yearbook team you joined?”

Newt’s heart thudded faster, frowning at the query. Thomas wanted to join the yearbook team? With a quick squeeze of his shoulder, the brunet let go and stood back slightly to observe Newt’s face; he wasn’t making it easy for him to let go. But he knew that if Thomas joined the team, they would see each other even more frequently. How was he supposed to move on if the boy kept pulling these kinds of stunts?

“Why?”

“Because I wanna help out with the book since it’s our last year and all that.”

The pair walked into their class and sat down next to each other out of habit. The brunet smiled sweetly at him and Newt’s heart lurched in his chest. Fuck.

“Well, uh, I think it’s more of a case of you have to be chosen to be in it than just ask and—“

“Hey, Zart!” Thomas called out as a larger, dirty-blond haired boy entered their class and took a seat in front of them. The boy raised an eyebrow at Thomas and Newt ran a hand over his chin as the brunet smiled. “What a coincidence—listen, I was wondering if there are any spots left to join the yearbook team?”

Zart beamed and nodded, “Yeah, man! Are you looking to join like Newt? We’d love to have both homecoming kings on the team this year.”

Nodding enthusiastically, Thomas looked like an excited puppy and Newt winced as he exclaimed, “Yeah, buddy!”

“All right! We’ve already had a few meetings, but our next one is after school tomorrow in the computer lab. Got it, guys?”

The pair hummed in confirmation as Zart turned back around, to find to Newt’s surprise, Thomas shooting the blond an even more eager grin. He tried to reciprocate it before facing the front of the class and sank down in his chair a little.

As the teacher wrote up the topic of today’s lesson on the board, Newt pulled a piece of paper out of his book and scribbled quickly onto it, passing the note to Thomas’ table.

 

            **I thought you hated committees?**

 

Thomas looked up at him and Newt raised his eyebrows, watching as his best friend wrote under his message and handed it back.

 

**This one will be fun :-)**

Sighing, he screwed up the paper the tapped his pen on the table, trying to focus on what Ms. Paige was talking about. Newt failed to take in anything in the Psychology lesson as Thomas kept nudging him to talk.

“Tommy, please! I’m trying to listen.” He whispered, snapping slightly. Thomas recoiled back slightly into his seat, apologising like he was a puppy that had just been kicked. He was so beautif— _stop!_ Newt pinched himself subtly to snap him out of those thoughts.

He tore his eyes away from Thomas and started to put pen to paper, writing down anything that came into his head about what they were learning.

“Fuck.” He breathed quietly so no one could hear.

Subconsciously, as he watched the blonde, white-suited woman at the front of the class, pace and point out points of the human mind on a diagram, Newt doodled on the side of his paper a couple of stick figures holding hands; crowns and hearts were added as if he were a seven year old with a first crush. He didn’t know how it happened, but once the drawing was finished, he realised that the stickmen were he and Thomas as homecoming kings.

Quickly ripping the page from his book, he crumpled it like the note and then chucked it into his bag. A hasty glance over at Thomas told him that he hadn’t been watching, but instead was sucking on the end of his pen. Newt sighed in defeat as he laid his head on the table. Life was against him yet again today, and without wanting to, he dozed off to sleep.

 

* * *

 

 

Newt heard giggling around him when he started to wake up, and a _thwack_ on his desk startled him as Ms Paige stood there holding a ruler. He rubbed at his eyes and the back of his neck, apologising sincerely before looking over at Thomas who wore an expression of sympathy.

The teacher gave him a warning about sleeping in her class, telling him that if there were a next time it would mean a detention. Newt nodded and swallowed as she walked back to the front of the class. Thomas leaned towards his table a little, eyes showing concern.

“Dude, are _you_ okay?” The word ‘no’ almost escaped his mouth, but he knew that if he said it then Thomas would pry even more. And Thomas didn’t need to know why he was sulking today.

So, with a nod, Newt said he was just tired as the lesson ended, the day dragged on and before they knew it, it was the next day and both he and Thomas were in the computer suite for the yearbook meeting.

When they walked in, a few people were already seated around a big round table in the centre of the room. Zart was the first to notice their entrance, leaping up in delight, throwing his arms out.

“Newt! Thomas! Come on in, we were just about to start!”

Newt saw a few familiar faces there, eyes meeting with Rachel’s. He couldn’t make out what she was feeling, but he was sure it was something to do with hurt. He cursed himself every day for using her the way he did. If he could turn back time and undo one thing in his life, he would’ve made sure he never messed with Rachel in the way he did. She deserved so much better than that. Newt made a mental note to formally apologise to her later.

A groan to the left of the room made Newt and Thomas turn their attention to where Brenda sat on a computer desk, observing her long purple nails. “You two idiots are on the committee too? Woop-de-doo.” She rolled her eyes and blew a strand of her fringe out of her face.

Newt didn’t know if Brenda was putting on her attitude or not, since they had connected and made up over the last few weeks. So, without a word in response, he took a seat beside a student he didn’t know, and Thomas sat on his right.

Once Zart started the meeting, Newt realised that most of what the leader said was just enthusiastic nothingness, but the blond couldn’t help but notice Thomas’ burning gaze on him throughout the speech. He tried his best not to blush, unsure if he succeeded or not. He chewed a little on his lip as he listened to what Zart was saying, assigning everyone roles.

“Stop doing that.”

Thomas leaned forward to rest his head on an open palm, supported by his elbow on the table. He gave Newt a confused smile, eyes narrowed slightly. “Doing what?”

“Looking at me like that—you’re kinda freaking me out.” Newt said quietly and playfully, as not to disturb the meeting. He earned a pout from Thomas he was sure was fake and the brunet turned away. Newt had to close a hand over his mouth to stop himself making a noise and smiling, but eventually broke into a hidden grin.

Zart gave them all sections of the yearbook to attend to, and the pair of them were given the task of organising the quotes under people’s names.

“This should be fun.” Thomas grinned at the blond who nodded along slowly, although he had hoped they would be working on different parts so they weren’t together all the time.

Newt looked up at Zart as the head of the committee walked past. “When do we start working?”

“From this very second,” Zart grinned. “Collect them any way you like, and you have to be able to put them onto the images in exactly four weeks. Very little time, but I’m sure you’ll manage it!”

The boy’s optimism and enthusiasm rubbed off on Newt, and the blond started bouncing slightly in his seat in excitement. He turned to Thomas, who was gathering up his bag. “Let’s start tomorrow, yeah?”

Thanking Zart, the blond pulled Thomas out of the room into the empty corridor afterhours. It was creepy how dead it was, with only a few of them leaving the computer suite to also vacate the school for the day.

“School is empty at this hour.” Thomas spoke, as if he was reading Newt’s mind.

Newt scoffed, “Why is that not a surprise? No one sticks around longer than they have to. Anyway, you, er, headin’ to mine?”

With a tilt of his head, Thomas ran a hand through his hair. “Can’t be round for long tonight, mom wants me home by seven-thirty, which gives us just over three hours. Wanna head somewhere Saturday though?”

That was Minho’s date day… Newt _umm’ed_ and _ahh’ed_ , playing with his fingers at his side.

“Saturday? Uh, I’ve already got plans.” He mumbled, not quite looking at Thomas directly, the brunet narrowing his eyes.

“With who?”

“ _Breeeeeenda…?_ ” Newt dragged out, praying to anyone that was listening up above that his stepsister would help him out.

“Newt?” Thomas asked again, making the blond realise that he had been quiet for a while now, and he wanted to just disappear. Why was he so bad at lying to Thomas about plans, but great at keeping his romantic feelings for him hidden?

“M-me and Brenda are heading out for the day… We’ve been planning it since before the _wedding_.” Newt ruffled his hair.

Thomas, although flinching at the word ‘wedding’, seemed to buy it because he clapped Newt on the back lightly and gave his shoulder another squeeze. “Dude, that’s great! I’m glad that you two are bonding.”

“Yeah, it’s been long overdue,” he smiled softly and the brunet bumped his hip against the blond’s. Newt rolled his eyes but his heart ached for the familiarity of the boy’s touch. He really wished he could just feel nothing for Thomas, but he knew he felt the exact opposite. Newt let Thomas wrap his arm around his shoulder as they walked outside.

“Did you bring your car?” Newt asked Thomas when he remembered that Minho had driven him to school that day.

“Yeah, you want a lift?”

“I’d love one.” Newt nodded and the pair approached the vehicle, clambering into it.

Inside, Thomas turned to him and wrinkled his nose. “Okay, honestly, I don’t really understand this whole collecting quote thing.”

“We just have to get people to submit a quote they want under their photo to us.” The blond explained briefly, chucking his bag to the floor by his feet.

“Right, right, yeah – of course. I’m an idiot.” _Yes you are_ , Newt thought with a sweet shake of his head, the car roaring to life. He pulled at the collar of his shirt when he heard his phone buzz in his bag.

 

**Minho: still good for Sat? :)**

**Newt: Should be!**

Looking back up from his phone, he glanced over at the boy to his left. Did he look nervous? Disappointed? No, it was probably just a trick of the light.

Thomas coughed, turning down a road. “Uh, you want to get something to eat before heading to yours? I’m hungry.”

“Frypan’s?” Newt asked, earning a smirk from the brunet.

“If you insist.”

 

* * *

 

 

Thomas joked around the whole way to their friend’s diner, going on about how they needed to get another frozen yoghurt this time, as Fry’s froyo was the best.

Newt nodded in agreement, feeling nostalgic all of a sudden. “Do you think we’ll have to share again?”

Parking the car up outside the building, Thomas put the car into neutral and turned off the engine. “I don’t know, maybe. Is that an issue?”

The blond swallowed and pushed the couple-like thoughts aside, “No, no, it’s fine.”

As usual, Frypan greeted them with a wide smile and huge hug as they entered the restaurant, which seemed to be busy and bustling as per usual. “Ay! There’s my favourite couple! How are ya, guys?”

Thomas rubbed the back of his neck after Fry embraced the both of them, Newt watching the veins in his arm protrude from beneath the skin, torturously.

“We’re actually not together anymore.” The brunet chuckled.

“What?” The cook exclaimed as he dropped his hands from their shoulders. “What happened? Isn’t it awkward for you two to be together?”

“We’re still good frien—“

“But didn’t you guys have a threesome?”

Both Newt and Thomas almost choked on the air they inhaled, shaking their heads and hands as their faces turned cherry red.

“That,” Thomas clarified, “never actually happened…”

“Ah, was it the girl?” Fry joked, but Newt glared, wanting him to just be quiet; he didn’t want to recall that night. Where had Teresa been since then? Newt saw Thomas flush red and bow his head.

“No, uh, we just couldn’t go through with it—how about a table, yeah?” The brunet changed the subject, giving Fry a look that Newt couldn’t read.

The cook nodded and led them to a table, excusing himself to get menus and drinks for them. They slid into the booth, opposite from one another.

“Where did he hear about that?” Thomas leaned forward, eyebrows furrowed and voice slightly more high-pitched than usual.

Swallowing, Newt felt memories of that night resurfacing: the undressing, Newt whispering “Relax”, the tight knot in his stomach and their kissing, hot and desperate kissing that lit his whole body on fire. He crossed his legs under the table before the tightness of his trousers became a problem.

“I-I guess news travels in Denver, even outside school…”

Thomas knew how he felt about him and had apparently totally gotten over Newt’s confession by how relaxed he suddenly looked as he said, “Let’s not talk about it, yeah?”

“Affirmative.”

The pair were handed menus by one of the waiters, Winston and the blond watched as Thomas’ face transformed into a huge beaming smile. “Winston! Long time no see, man!”

He stood up to side hug the waiter and Newt watched comfortably from where he sat.

“You too, Thomas. Is this the guy people say you’re dating?”

What shocked Newt was that Thomas nodded a bit, but then corrected Winston. “Dated, actually. Past tense, but we’re still best friends.”

Heart sinking at the declaration, Newt tried to tell himself over and over that he was over it, he was moving on, he had Minho and those words shouldn’t hurt as much as they did. So, he smiled up at the unfamiliar waiter. “Hi!”

He earned a smile back at him as he asked for their orders and noted them down. “Well, I better get this to the kitchen. It was nice seeing you guys.”

The boy tapped Thomas in a friendly manner on the cheek as he went past, and the brunet chuckled for a little while, staring back at Newt.

“Two people in the space of about five minutes… that must be some kind of record.” He huffed, earning a scoff from Newt.

“Yeah, I guess that’s both a perk and con of being the first ‘gay couple’ that came out here…”

“It was fun, right? Mostly…” Thomas looked Newt up and down, searching for something Newt didn’t know, and the blond licked his lips unknowingly. He wanted to say that aside from the whole falling in love with you part, losing my virginity to someone that wasn’t you and getting my heart crushed, broken and smashed to pieces by _you_ , yeah, it was a barrel of laughs! But instead, Newt averted his gaze, tilted his head and hummed; drumming his fingers on the table lightly.

Thomas smiled at him, as if nothing was wrong and he got him. But obviously, the brunet could never understand what Newt had been through. They looked at each other for a while, until Winston chose to bring out their food and drinks.

“Fry had them pushed to the front as priority orders, so here you go. Enjoy, fellas!” The boy knocked them both out of their daydreams before he left, and they picked at their food in silence. Newt was sick of the quiet between them and tried to think of a topic – absolutely anything – to talk about.

“So, I bought a new game and it should be arriving this afternoon. Well, Steve bought it for me.”

Nodding, Thomas chewed his mouthful of food and swallowed before replying, “Awesome! What game is it?”

“Call of Duty.”

Thomas jumped slightly from his seat in a kind of excitement he forgot the boy possessed. “You’re serious?”

He smiled at him and nodded, crinkles forming in the corner of his eyes.

“Dude, we’re gonna have to play it straight away when you’re free.”

“I thought you were coming over for a little while?”

An unknown waiter brought them over two pots of froyo for when they were done and they thanked them, still tucking into their meal, speaking between mouthfuls.

“You still want me over after this?” Thomas asked, eyebrows raised.

“Of course I do, Tommy.”

The ding of the restaurant bell rang loud and clear as a group of about six boys entered, all dressed in clothes typical to work outs or sporting team. The sound caused Newt to glance up briefly, not expecting to see anyone he knew, but he swallowed a chip too fast when he saw a familiar boy with a jet-black quiff waving at him. Newt cursed under his breath and his heart thudded faster in his chest. What was Minho doing here?

The jock approached them quickly, jogging over and away from his friends before he flopped onto the seat beside Newt, wrapping an arm around the back of the chair, close to Newt’s shoulders.

“Hey, boys. What’s shaking?”

Newt tried not to tense his body, noticing the Asian’s fingers brushing lightly against his shoulder in a way that lit that spot in a sudden bust of tingles. Why was his life one big mess?

“Hey, dude!” Thomas grinned through a mouthful of the burger he’d almost finished. “What brings you here? Out celebrating or something?”

Minho shook his head (how was his hair still as perfect as it was at the start of the day after doing sports?) and cocked it to the side. “Just finished hurdles practice and the boys and I same here for a coffee.”

“You drink coffee after sport?”

“Hell yeah.”

Thomas laughed and shoved in another mouthful of his food, all the while Newt was keeping quiet, Minho’s arm still close to his shoulder. Suddenly, as the brunet turned to try and get a waiter’s attention to ask for the bill, Newt felt a hot breath against his ear. Minho whispered lowly, so quiet Newt almost didn’t catch it. “Follow me.”

Minho slipped out of the chair, making the excuse that he was going to re-join his group when actually he walked into the bathrooms, leaving Newt confused.

He left it a minute before the blond excused himself too and went to the toilets after Minho, looking over his shoulder at where Thomas sat by the window in their booth. The light was pouring into the diner, leaving the brunet in an almost perfect silhouette and taking Newt’s breath from his throat.

When he entered the bathrooms, the Asian was washing his face and the blond approached him slowly, hoping no one else was in there to listen to them.

“What’s wrong, Min?”

The tap was turned off and Minho looked up at Newt, face dripping with water before he pulled his shirt up to dab at the droplets. He tried not to stare at the bare skin that was showing, dropping his gaze to his shoes for a second or so.

“I’m sorry I came off so…” Minho made a gesture with his hands as tried to find the right word but couldn’t, but Newt knew what he meant anyway. “Out there.”

Newt pursed his lips and stepped forward. “It’s okay… I just did not expect it. Did you really get off from practice to get a coffee?”

Minho nodded, a half-smile appearing on his face. “Yeah, why?”

Eyebrows rising, Newt shook his head to hide a small grin. “You must have worked hard to get your shirt to be practically transparent.”

The jock ran his hand subconsciously over his chest in reaction to his words, and his face was now home to a full smirk as he gazed at the blond in front of him, eyes full of affection.

“Where are you two headed after this? Just so I can play the protective boyfriend role.” Minho moved closer to Newt this time so the gap was minimal between them. Newt swallowed. Shit.

“He’s coming over to mine…”

“Oh?” The athlete looked him up and down, taking one of the blond’s hands in his softly.

“I got this new video game and Tommy’s desperate to try it out, so I said he could come over and play it for a while tonight.”

Circles were traced onto the back of Newt’s hand by Minho’s thumb, so delicately that he had to close his eyes and concentrate to feel the touch against his skin.

“You don’t mind, do you?”

Minho smiled and dipped his head, shaking it. “No, no, I don’t mind. As long as we have Saturday.”

Newt nodded and reopened his eyes, looking into the boy’s deep brown eyes, a few shades darker than Thomas’, but still as mesmerizing. “Of course.”

It surprised the blond when he noticed Minho was slowly leaning in to kiss Newt on the lips, but stopped before he could when it was evident he had realised they were in a public restroom – anyone could walk in at any time and see them. So, instead, Minho brought the back of Newt’s hand up to his lips and pressed it softly against them in a quick, delicate kiss as if he were Prince Charming that had just saved the princess from her tower. Newt swallowed hard as he watched, a guilty feeling in his stomach.

The touch lingered, but once Minho let go, he stood back and sighed out a breath, signalling for Newt to leave the bathrooms first to avoid suspicion. The blond knew he would follow soon after but he nodded, placed a gentle hand on the boy’s chest before he made his way out of the room. It pained him to keep seeing the hurt on Minho’s face every time they had to part ways, to not be seen with each other. The boy didn’t show his emotions often, but Newt was sure he was beginning to read him, even in small moments before Minho was all cheerful once more.

Hurrying back to his table, he slid into his seat and ruffled the side of his hair a little. He paused, noticing that Thomas had finished his meal and had already eaten the majority of his frozen yoghurt.

“Hey! You ate it without me!” Newt picked up a fry and took a bit of his burger as the brunet looked up from his bowl, the side of his mouth dripping with the desert.

“It was melting!” He exclaimed, oblivious to the mess.

Newt couldn’t help himself, spluttering out a laugh, placing a hand over his mouth to try and drown out as much of the noise as possible. As Thomas grabbed at a napkin from the dispenser, Newt held out a hand, accidentally touching his skin. A shock was sent through his fingertips, but he pushed it aside.

“No, please let me take a picture first!”

Thomas furrowed his eyebrows, but as the blond fished out his phone, he chuckled and let the cackling boy snap a picture of him giving a huge grin. He opened his photos to look at the image, sliding it across the table for Thomas to look at.

From the corner of his eyes, Newt could see Minho walking out of the bathroom. The jock turned around, their eyes meeting briefly before Minho moved his gaze to Thomas, and then away once more to his friends as he went to get the coffee he’d come for.

Newt looked back at his phone as the brunet wiped the froyo from his face, a small smile still present from looking at the picture. As he was rubbing at the mess, he pointed at Newt, threatening him with a finger. “That photo is not going anywhere, alright?”

Holding up his hands in surrender, Newt smirked. “I can’t make any promises, Tommy. Sorry.”

The brunet scrunched his face up and reached across the table for his best friend’s phone, but Newt was too fast, pulling it out of his reach just in time. As if planned, the two stood up in synchronisation, gazes locked until they burst out into laughter. The blond shoved the phone in his pocket as the two stumbled out of the booth, going to the main bar to pay for the food before they left.

Thomas offered to pay but Newt objected, sliding a note across to the cashier at the till so he paid his equal share. He felt his best friend sling his arm around his shoulders as their change came back and Fry bid them farewell. Newt mumbled back a thanks, the limb draped around him making his body heat up as they made their way past Minho and his friends, waving goodbye.

The air was cool outside as they left the café and it stung he blond’s eyes a little as they walked, whipping at his face and through his hair. Thomas seemed to be fine, a jolly look on his face as he hop-skipped along to his car.

“Did you know Minho is captain of seven sports teams at school?” Newt blurted out, not knowing where the statement had come from, but the arm around him finally dropped back to Thomas’ side as he went to search in his pocket.

Thomas’ eyebrows rose and his eyes widened as he pulled out his keys. “Seven? Really? I knew he was involved in a ton of them, but hell…”

Newt nodded, stopping beside the brunet as the door was being unlocked. He then shuffled around to the passenger’s side and ducked into the vehicle, sitting comfortably by his friend’s side.

“You know, actually, Minho being the captain of all those teams doesn’t surprise me. He’s got great arms.”

“And legs.” Newt nodded along, images of Minho’s physique filling his mind. He pictures the jock in front of him as he sat on his bed, his muscular torso in full view for him to admire, but soon Minho looked to the side and smirked, beckoning someone into view; that someone was Thomas, also giving Newt a full view of his chest. Although not as lean as the boy to his side, Thomas was broad and just as much as a vision for Newt’s eyes to feast on than Minho was.

“Yeah, legs too.” Thomas’ voice snapped him out of his daydream, feeling himself go red in the face. “Right, I have a little while left until my mom wants me home so… Allons-y.”

 

* * *

 

 

The car rolled up into Newt’s driveway as if on autopilot at its daily return to the spot. The brunet parked up and the two jumped out, locking up before Newt ushered Thomas towards the front door rather than his tree.

“I never asked, but how’s your mom’s honeymoon?” Thomas asked, slipping his hands into his pockets as he bounced on the balls of his feet, waiting for the blond to let them into the house.

The key turned in the lock and Newt opened the door for them, welcoming his friend inside. “I don’t know, she hasn’t been able to contact me since she went. They’ll be back late Friday evening though, and I’m sure they’re having a great time.”

Newt watched as Thomas nodded and pursed his lips, taking off his shoes politely before following the blond upstairs. He was silent until halfway to the landing, making the blond jump.

“Does she… hate me? I mean, after our faking it thing?”

Turning to face him, Newt looked down at Thomas who had stopped a step down from him, gazing up with sad puppy-dog eyes.

“She doesn’t hate either of us… she thinks of you as family, Tommy. She’s just not used to the idea of us— _me_ , but she’ll come around… she has to.” Newt stammered when he mentioned their relationship, correcting himself in referring just to his feelings. It was the first time since the big reveal that he’d admitted his sexual orientation in a way to Thomas, and his mouth went dry.

“She called us a phase, Newt. That’s more than not being used to it. That’s just ignorance… But I trust you; I know that you’ll get her to come around. Like you said, she loves you.”

Pursing his lips, Newt side-glanced at Thomas and bit the inside of his cheek before moving to his room to grab the controllers for his console. He chucked one to the brunet as he entered, and the boy caught it with a few clumsy tosses in the air. Newt didn’t want to think about what Thomas had said, and so went to open his new game, put the disk in and then sat down on the bed behind his best friend.

They did the same each day for the rest of the week, and on the Friday, Newt looked down at Thomas practically sat between his legs on the floor, realising the position he’d been in the past few days. He was falling back into old routines once again, and he took a deep breath before starting the round. He thought twice about scooting closer to the edge of the bed, so Thomas was leaning back against him.

“Dude, thank god your feet don’t smell.” Thomas remarked as he stuck his tongue out of the side of his mouth in concentration as the online match of the first person shooter game started. Thomas had made it a habit of sitting on he floor in this exact place recently, and it took all of he blond’s willpower to tear his eyes from the pink tongue protruding from between his lips, wondering what it would be like to kiss the brunet with it in his mouth…

Newt laughed and swallowed, focusing on the screen as the round commenced, launching them into a battle with guns blazing and bullets flying in every direction. He took down a few of the opposing team – many of the times it was Thomas he killed, sniggering. Although, as the round neared to a close, Thomas grabbed his right foot, dropped his controller and began ticking the bare skin.

“Hey!” Newt gasped for air, wriggling in the boy’s grasp, uncontrollable giggles escaping his mouth. “That’s not fair!”

It was Thomas’ turn to laugh now as he re-grabbed his controller and took down the blond’s character with a melee attack, giving him the final kill of the game.

“Game, set, match! That’s what you get for singling me out!” Thomas leapt up and turned his body fully to the boy, attacking Newt’s sides with his fingers.

“You—cheated!” Newt cackled, his back hitting the bed as he squirmed to get away from Thomas’ teasing fingers on his waist. As he tickled him there, stealing the breath out of his lungs, he bellowed with laughter and attempted to crawl away from his best friend. “S-stop! Tommy!”

Thomas was laughing, trying to put on a fake evil laugh to fit the ‘torturous’ event, climbing onto the bed to get a better angle to tickle the thinner boy. His fingers tickled Newt’s sides, chin, feet and the one space under his rib that only Thomas knew was one of the blond’s weak spots.

He didn’t keep the attack up for long, as before they both knew it, they were in the middle of the bed laughing, Newt hitting Thomas’ side repeatedly as payback. The brunet tried to get a few final pinches in as Newt’s face started to return to its less-flustered, less-red colour, but an ‘ahem’ at the door alerted them to someone else’s presence.

Newt saw Thomas dart his eyes to the opening, sitting up slightly from where they lay there, limbs slightly tangled. He soon followed, sitting up to see his mother – tan, blond, beautiful and pouting – tapping her foot in the doorway. She pulled her lips back into a smile as she stopped her drumming, Newt feeling Thomas moving to sit further away from the blond at this point.

“Uh, mum… I didn’t think you were home until later this evening?” Newt tried to keep his voice straight, but it was still shaky from laughing, moving his hand to steady himself. However, as he did, his fingers brushed with Thomas’ on the bed and he immediately recoiled, clearing his throat.

“We just got back – our flight was moved two hours earlier. Believe me, I’d be back later if I could’ve been – I did not want to leave that gorgeous Caribbean sun!” Anne grabbed for the handle of the door with her manicured hand and shot the pair a look that Newt didn’t understand – it wasn’t one of disgust, disappointment or any other feelings she’d expressed to his relationship with Thomas in the past. “Just, whatever the two of you are doing, keep it down a little. Have fun, boys.”

“Mum, I—“ Newt started, saying through his teeth but she had already closed the door and he could hear her and Steve scurrying about unpacking. She seemed different somehow…

Thomas moved beside him and Newt gazed at him, twiddling his long fingers in his lap as he stared at the same spot his mother had been just mere moments ago.

“Don’t mind her, Tommy.” Newt stood up from the messy bed to grab the controllers. “Do you still want to play?”

“She didn’t seem angry with us.” Thomas blinked at the woodwork as Newt pushed the controller against his broad chest. It fell into his lap and bounced off to the side. “I mean, we could’ve been doing anything, but she didn’t seem to mind.”

“Tommy?” Newt questioned, pushing the boy’s hair back slightly with his hand to get the brunet to look up at him. Chestnut eyes followed the length of Newt’s arm to his eyes, blinking a few times more.

“Mhmm?”

“Are you feeling okay?”

Once Newt removed his hand from the boy’s head, concern about his sudden change in attitude apparent in his voice, the blond watched as Thomas ran a veiny hand up and down his arm before sliding off the mattress. He seemed to be thinking about something, and as Newt observed their surroundings, he knew Thomas was right about something: the state of his bed could’ve suggested many things and his mother hadn’t really batted an eyelid.

“As much as I’d love to stay and kick your ass at Call of Duty or FIFA, man, my mom’s curfew is calling.”

Newt shot a quick look to his clock, reading that it was only six, which meant that Thomas still had a while before he had to be home for his curfew—a curfew, might he add, that he hadn’t yet been told why had been put in place. But he nodded, messy hair bouncing. “Sure, sure. That’s fine. And please, you only won because you cheated – I could beat you any day of the week at this game. I know which spots are your downfall.”

“I thought you would give up on the fact I’m not that ticklish, Newt.”

“I know other weaknesses of yours, Tommy – don’t you forget that.”

A small half-smirk appeared on the brunet’s lips that made Newt’s ears burn hot, shuffling a foot on the carpeted floor like a giddy schoolgirl. He hated how little control he had over himself around Thomas, even when he kept telling himself to not react the way he did—it was second nature to him, like something hardwired into his DNA that caused him to blush and giggle and be in love with Thomas the way he was.

“I’ll see you on Monday. Enjoy your day with Brenda!”

Newt nodded, careful not to open his mouth in response in fear that a whimper would come out. Instead he let out a breath through his nose and raised a hand to wave. The brunet caught the hand and Newt stared at it as he was pulled into an embrace, Thomas’ arms wrapping around him in a tight hug that would’ve taken the breath out of him if the brunet hadn’t done that already just by existing. Newt stood frozen, forcing his arms to reciprocate the action, heart stabbing at his chest, wanting Thomas to feel just what he was doing to him still. Maybe they should add hugs to the list they had begun to create of things they weren’t quite ready to do yet— _especially_ not unexpected ones.

He resisted the urge to bury his head into the crook of Thomas’ neck, and a few seconds later, his back was patted hard and he was released, seeing the departure of his best friend—soulmate—love of his life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter is probably the length of three and VERY UN-BETA'd, but i was nagged by so many people for a longer and sooner update so, after very little sleep may i add ha, here is the colossal chapter i promised!  
> too much stuff happening to mention, but make sure to leave comments about the main things in this chapter (hehehehehe lots of action), kudos and subscribe to get notifications of updates by clicking the subscribe button up top :-)
> 
> i haven't promoted this in a long while, but if you haven't seen the amazing trailer for this fic that my friend made, then be sure to [check it out on youtube](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=57A17HQs8SQ).
> 
> let's keep hoping i have the motivation to write more chapters in shorter time periods! feel free to nag me on [twitter](http://twitter.com/grantgustins) about ideas to include or just to push updates! enjoy, guys (◡‿◡✿)
> 
> rosie


	20. twenty

Excited. That’s how Newt felt the next morning when he woke up and checked his alarm clock. He had set it for eight, but it read quarter-past seven – he’d woken before it had the chance to go off. Normally he would’ve groaned and pulled the covers up high over his messy blond bedhead, but Newt sat up, yawned as he stretched and jumped out of bed in an unusually happy mood for this time of the day.

Showering, he washed his body and his hair so it smelled nice and wasn’t clumpy, dried himself once he was done and decided to use some of Steve’s cologne. He popped the cap, sniffed it and wrinkled his nose at the strength of the smell, but it was pleasant and he applied a moderate amount.

Newt wrapped a towel around his lower half as he re-entered his bedroom, making his way to his wardrobe when he heard his phone chime on his bedside table. He stopped, turned and shuffled towards it, taking the device in his hand to see what was written on the screen.

 

**Minho: morning!!!**

 

He couldn’t help but smile and roll his eyes; of course Minho would be up at this time too. The boy hardly slept, he didn’t expect anything less.

 

**Newt: good morning :) when are you picking me up?**

 

Taking the phone with him, he walked to the closet and opened it, trying to find something that was suitable for a date—not that he’d ever been on a real one before. As he observed the clothes that lined the rails, he pursed his lips and moved them around to the side. All he owned were jumpers, coats and blazers – none of them much suited the occasion. Besides, he had no real clue of where they were headed, Minho still insisted on keeping it a secret, so he sighed as he rummaged a bit more and pulled out a button-up grey shirt with some black skinny-jeans. They would have to do.

Getting changed into the clothes, Newt restyled his hair in the mirror, huffing to himself when he realised he had used up all the gel in the bathroom cabinet, so he would have to brush it a little and go with a dishevelled look he hoped the jock liked. His phone buzzed and displayed a new text message onscreen.

 

**Minho: waiting for you – window**

 

Quickly grabbing a coat and keys, Newt scurried to the window, spotting Minho’s silhouette in the early morning darkness by his car. He squealed a little, unsure whether it was an extension to his excitement or nerves. He decided it was a bit of both.

Leaving a note on the table for his parents telling them he’d be back later and couldn’t wait to talk to them about their honeymoon, Newt began fast walking towards the door and smiled. He exited his house, closing the door quietly so he didn’t wake his family and jogged to Minho, who was dressed casually just like the blond— _phew, no where fancy_ , he thought.

“Hey there,” Minho grinned, leaning forward to press a kiss to his cheek. Newt leant into the touch, heart fluttering. “Slept well?”

“Today better be worth waking up early for,” he teased, winking, only to earn him a playful nudge to his side.

Minho smirked, “Hell yeah it will be – at least, I hope so. Shall we head off and get some breakfast before the day starts?”

Newt felt Minho reach for his hand and give it a squeeze lightly before leaning to the side to open the car door for him. He didn’t want to think about how the gesture reminded him of Thomas, but failed and tried to hide it by rolling his eyes and chuckling. He silently cursed himself.

Once in the car, Newt strapped himself in and Minho soon took a seat on the driver’s side as usual, starting the car up to drive away from the Isaac-Despain residence. On the journey, he tried several times to ask Minho where they were headed after their breakfast, but only received a small smile and an “it’s a surprise” reply each time. By the forth time he got the same answer, the blond sulked down in his seat a little.

“Aw, come on,” Minho reached over to touch his leg, still focused on the road. “Don’t pout – although that pouty face is adorable – you’ll love it.”

Narrowing his eyes, Newt continued to mope and found himself gazing at Minho as he drove, rather than out of the window. Strong bone structure and chiselled arms decorated the jock as if they were carved by Michelangelo the Renaissance artist. The veins in his arms protruded every time he reached for the joystick or handbrake, the pulse of Newt’s heart now audible in his own ears. How did someone like Minho have any interest in someone like _him?_

Pulling over down a small, quiet street, Minho nodded at Newt for him to get out, and the blond let himself be guided into a small café on the corner. It was busier than the street outside, but nowhere near as bustling as a huge chain coffee shop; the queue was relatively short and they stood side-by-side so that their hips were touching. Newt realised that they were far enough out of the centre of town that no one would recognise him here, so he swallowed and twiddled his fingers before sliding a hand into Minho’s. It felt natural, like Newt and Minho had been doing it for years. It was nice. Simple.

When Newt turned to look at the boy to his side, he noticed that Minho was staring down at their entwined fingers now, mouth slightly open in a surprised expression and he leaned forward to place a quick peck to his cheek to snap him out of whatever fantasy world he was in. The jock looked up at him and coughed a little, smiling in a way that warmed the blond’s heart.

“I—uh, what would you like to eat?” Minho asked as they moved forward together, nudging Newt’s hip lightly.

As Newt glanced over at the menu and glass cabinets that lined the front of the café, he saw various items of food that looked delightful. Scanning his eyes along even more, he spotted a plate of croissants that looked familiar to the ones Minho had bought before and his stomach growled.

“Is this the place you bought those croissants from?” He asked and Minho nodded, gelled hair not moving as he did. “Then I’d love a croissant.”

“One croissant it is,” the jock smiled, deep dimples appearing in his cheeks. “I myself fancy some French toast and a latte.”

The barista took their food orders alongside a regular tea and a large latte, and once it was paid and prepared in a matter of minutes, they made their way to an empty table by the window. It was covered with hanging origami cranes and Newt looked on at it in awe as he took a seat opposite Minho, who put down the tray carefully.

“So,” Newt narrowed his eyes as he thought. “From what I’ve concluded so far from this detour, we’re not in any real rush to get to this mystery place, so it’s somewhere that you don’t have an entrance time for.”

“Ah,” Minho chuckled, stirring his latte with his spoon before putting it in his mouth, running the metal on his tongue. “You would be correct.”

Swallowing, he looked down at his tea, pouring the milk in after taking out the tea bag that had stewed there for a little while—anything to distract himself from looking at Minho’s mouth.

“Where are we going?”

“Let’s play a game,” the spoon was dropped onto the saucer as Minho tapped the table with one hand, the other reaching across to hold Newt’s. “Ten questions.”

“Isn’t it usually twenty?” Newt raised an eyebrow and groaned, rubbing his thumb subconsciously over the jock’s palm. “Fine, but I suck at these.”

The boy only smiled at Newt, face radiating happiness as he picked up his coffee and took a sip. “Start whenever you like.”

Newt let go of Minho’s hand to take a bit of his croissant, leaning back in his chair. The taste of the pastry was incredible as before and he hummed in both thought and approval, rubbing his chin. “Hmm… Is it somewhere big?”

“Mildly.”

Leaning forward, Newt took a hold of his cup. “Will there be a lot of people there?

“Probably,” the jock answered, not giving anything away in his face.

“Is it an outside place?”

With a shake of his head, Minho bit into his French toast, which smelt just as good – if not better – than Newt’s breakfast.

Newt groaned, ripping off another part of his croissant, popping it into his mouth in frustration. “Uh, I’m so bad at guessing games. Is it a formal place?

“Not even close. Definitely not.” Minho laughed a chesty laugh that Newt adored. “Six questions left, make ‘em good.”

Straining himself to think of questions that could narrow down their final destination in this part of Denver, Newt sipped his drink and asked about animals and books (to which he received “no” answers to) alongside noise, children, lights and money which all got nods.

“I give up – I have no idea.” Newt surrendered, picking up the final part of his breakfast to take a bite of, his tea already finished and almost as good as the one his mother made.

“All right, all right – I won’t torture you anymore. Once we’re finished we’ll head straight there for just after the opening time. Deal?”

“You’re still not telling me?”

“No point, we’ll be at the place in ten minutes.”

The blond huffed and finished his breakfast, watching as Minho glugged his coffee and shook his head as the caffeine rush began to kick in. A smile and grab of Newt’s hand saw their rapid departure from the café, bell chiming on the way out.

 

* * *

 

 

The drive was as short as Minho said, as in less than ten minutes they were parked in a small car park. Newt took off his seatbelt and shifted in his space, looking around at the surroundings outside the vehicle before settling his gaze on Minho. “Where on earth are we?”

“You’ll see.” Minho grinned, the two of them exiting the car. Newt trailed behind the boy who seemed to be leading him to a large, plain white building. A bunch of people were entering it, a lot around their sort of age and Newt began to suss out what exactly they’d spend the day doing.

The double doors opened for them and Newt winced immediately once they stepped inside, the bright lights and loud noises greeting them in full force. Zaps and Thuds ricocheted around the room like the kids running all over the place from machine to machine, shining coins glinting in their hands as the strobe lights illuminated the space.

“An arcade?”

Newt stood still, eyes still scanning the unfamiliar building for a while longer before he craned his neck to see Minho. The boy stood with hands in his pockets, and for the first time ever the blond thought he looked nervous, wincing a little himself.

“I know you like games and Xbox, so I figured the arcade would be a great place to go. I’m not much of a gamer myself, but my friend Ben likes to come here every so often.”

 _I’m not much of a gamer myself_. Newt blinked a few times, processing the thoughts in his mind. Minho didn’t like games that much, but he had planned an arcade date and was prepared to spend the day here with him to make him happy. He felt so warm and fuzzy and weird inside all of a sudden as he continued to hold eye contact with the blushing boy before him.

“Is it okay?” Minho cleared his throat, as the blond hadn’t said anything in a little while.

Nodding furiously, Newt beamed and jumped forward to hug the jock tightly, smiling into the boy’s shoulder with closed eyes. The feeling of Minho curling his hands into his back then appeared and the blond pulled back to plant a quick kiss to his cheek. He didn’t know any of the crowd around here but that just made the situation even better; he didn’t give a damn what people saw or thought, and no one back home would talk.

“It’s really great, Min. Come on, I’ll talk you through a few games.” Taking his hand, Newt led the boy deeper into the busy building, walking backwards for a while before heading towards the first token machine they spotted. They exchanged a couple of dollars for chips for the machines, soon after heading for the racing games.

Newt went for a simple racing car game, sliding into the left seat whilst Minho took the right. It was simple enough for Minho to grasp, he reckoned, placing two tokens into the slot. The game burst to life, asking them to write their abbreviated names (“Nwt” and “Min” being the final decision) before selecting the car type they’d like to drive in. Newt chuckled and helped Minho pick a decent enough car, before settling back in his own seat to choose his own.

“You know, I may be an amateur, but I have a good feeling about this race.” Minho sang cockily, gripping his wheel tightly as the game counted down.

“Just don’t cry too hard when you lose.” Newt smirked and the game displayed a bright “GO!” on the screen, causing the boys to both press their foot down on the pedal on the floor of the game.

Minho’s car bumped into Newt’s several times as he tried to get a hang of the steering, but Newt returned the favour by bumping into him so he could overtake the boy and speed ahead to the finish. He laughed out loud at Minho’s protests about him cheating, with the end standings being Newt in first and Minho in fifth behind the computer.

Hopping out of the game chair, Newt laughed, holding his stomach. “Told you I’d win.”

Minho shrugged. “I’m putting it down to my lack of experience.”

“Come on,” the blond rolled his eyes and nudged the boy’s side with his elbow. “Just admit that I’m better than you.”

“Well, even if that _was_ the case, you’re definitely not better than me at air hockey – that _is_ something I can tell you.”

With a fake gasp, Newt tilted his head to the side. “Is that a challenge, Mr. Park?”

“Damn right it was, Mr. Isaacs.” Minho jabbed a finger at him before jogging off to find the air hockey section, located near the snack shop at the back. Newt followed swiftly, stopping slightly behind the boy to his side when he saw enthusiastic players took all the tables. He watched the jock stroll over to one and place a token on it’s side to call ‘dibs’ on the next game before returning to Newt’s side. He leaned his body in close to the blond’s and Newt couldn’t help but bite back a smile, taking his lower lip into his teeth.

It wasn’t long before the table was empty, the two making their way towards it. Minho grinned and nipped his side with his hand, causing Newt to yelp and frown at him as they took up arms with the mallets at either end. Newt had the token slot at his end, reaching over to pick up the chip and place it into the machine, causing the air to whir and come to life. The lights on the scoreboard at the top lit up and the pair put on their game faces.

As the game began, Newt started off playing more enthusiastically than necessary. He scored the first point, throwing his arms up and sticking his tongue out at Minho, but not long after the favour was returned as Minho smashed the puck into his goal.

Minho scoffed and cricked his neck from side to side, smiling. “Oh, that’s how you want to play, huh? It’s so on. Bring it.”

Newt hit the puck back into play, only to have Minho score again a few moments later. He gaped and threw his hands out in the air as the Asian laughed and flexed his fingers on the mallet.

The next point, Newt pouted and shot another goal but he could see that Minho had taken the chance to pretend to look around, only to glance back when the puck was in his goal.

“Oh no! You scored again!” Minho exclaimed in a fake tone of voice.

“Hey, you don’t have to let me win – I can beat you without a helping hand!” Newt watched with narrow eyes as Minho retrieved the puck.

“You want me to go hard on you?” The boy smirked and Newt nodded, pushing aside the possible innuendo.

With that, the puck was slammed into Newt’s goal and the game continued with a violent array of smashes. In the end, Minho came out triumphant with eleven points, Newt not far behind with eight.

“Fine, you got me.”

“Told you I was good. I’m unbeatable at air hockey.” Minho laughed, walking away from the table with the blond so a little boy and his brother could take a turn.

“I went easy on you.” Newt teased.

“You did not!”

They paced around a little bit, wondering which games to play next. As Newt scanned the titles of games, he couldn’t help but think about the amount of time he and Thomas would’ve spent here if they’d known about it as kids.

“Tommy would love this place.” Newt hadn’t realised he had said those words out loud, but when he did, he turned to look at Minho’s reaction. The boy looked relatively unfazed, but he apologised all the same, as Minho knew he still had feelings for him. “I-I’m sorry.”

“Sorry about what?” Minho played the comment off, smile still on his lips. “You think he’d like it here, huh? I think so too.”

They approached a shooting game and placed a token in. As Newt picked up the gun, he laughed and turned to the boy, bouncing the pretend weapon in his hand. “There was this shooting game in Fry’s diner a while back that me and Tommy used to play – a lot like this one. He used to put his gun to my head and I would pretend to cry and say ‘please, Tommy. _Please_ ’ and he’d pull the trigger.”

He saw Minho furrow his eyebrows, but a chuckle left his lips. “I never would’ve pegged you for one with a dark sense of humour.”

Shrugging, they pressed play and decided to play co-op rather than versus, taking out anything that was in front of them – zombies, other survivors, you name it. Occasionally Newt would laugh when he saw out of the corner of his eye, Minho ducking to avoid any bullets headed at them. His heart swelled at how into the game the boy was getting, improving with every moment it went on.

His thoughts were so focused on the boy that when Minho shouted for him to use the grenade his character had, he stalled and the bulbous zombie on screen exploded, killing them. The screen read ‘GAME OVER’ and the two placed the guns back in their holders.

“Dammit, we were so close to getting to the bonus stage.” Minho ran a hand through his quiff.

“Sorry, I was distracted.”

“Nah, it’s okay. I was getting a cramp in my hand from reloading the gun too often anyway.”

Newt laughed and the pair of them walked away to play on a few more games, including speed hoop-shooting, a whack-a-mole and various other racing games, until Newt spotted a specific flashing in the corner of the room.

“Oh my god, Minho—you have to go and play that dancing game!”

The blond extended his arm towards the game station, grabbing Minho’s hand with his free one, tugging him forward through the crowd. They reached it and Newt smiled at him.

“Oh no, I don’t dance.” The jock shook his head and hands.

“You’re super athletic – I know you can.”

“Not a chance, Newt. I can run, dunk, swim, ski, but dancing is something I definitely can’t do.”

“Neither can I, but it will be fun. Please.” Newt stuck out his bottom lip in a childish manner, and batted his eyelashes like a tiny child that wanted candy.

He heard Minho curse under his breath and sigh, stepping forward as he flexed his arms. “Fine, but only if you’re playing too.”

It was a fair deal, and he would feel less embarrassed if he were dancing alongside the boy. So, he stepped onto the dance floor beside Minho and giggled as he inserted their final two tokens; he motioned for Minho to pick the song, but regretted it when the jock laughed and pressed a song by the _Spice Girls_.

Newt raised his eyebrows. “Seriously?”

“What can I say? I’m a sucker for _Scary Spice_.” Minho winked and the music began to play.

Shaking his head fondly at the boy, Newt watched the song load up. “And you picked Wannabe as the song? Amazing.”

“Hey! Don’t diss the spice! I’d be their lover any time.”

The arrows popped up on screen signalling which way they needed to step. Although it started slow, the pair of them really were awful and terribly out of sync, but Minho added stupid hand movements that made Newt laugh. They were even worse when it reached the chorus, stepping everywhere tying to catch up with single and double arrows, jumping all over the floor. Newt managed just about to keep up most of the time, but Minho was all over the place. The song ended and the pair were breathing hard as well as laughing, falling over the poles put around the game.

“Did we pass the level?” Newt wondered, catching his breath. The screen flashed up with their scores, notifying them that the blond had done the best – not that it was any surprise to either of them. But, they had gotten high enough to select another song; ending up dancing to some lame up beat tune neither of them knew. Newt won once again, giving Minho a victorious, cheeky wink and they stepped off.

Deciding to take a break from games for a while, the pair ended up in the back of the arcade, hidden behind a pillar in the shadows, kissing sweetly away from prying eyes. Newt’s hand was in the hair at the nape of Minho’s neck, whilst both of the jock’s were settled on the blond’s waist, touches soft and gentle, fleeting and feather-like. When they broke apart for air, Newt rested his cheek on Minho’s and smiled, eyes still closed.

“That was fun.”

Minho chuckled a laugh that made his shoulders shake, and Newt could feel the joy radiate out of him. “Yeah, I especially enjoyed these last five minutes… I really, uh, really like you, Newt.”

With a smile, Newt leaned more into the slightly smaller boy. “I like you too, Minho.”

A growling came from his stomach, almost painful in their quiet corner, earning another snicker from the jock. “Hungry again?”

“It’s lunch time. Gaming wears me out.” He rolled his eyes playfully, and before he knew it, the boy had grabbed his hand and Newt was being pulled towards the small café opposite the snack shack in the back. They ate their lunch there – simple sandwiches, nothing fancy but enough to fill them up – and made plans to head back, as they had been at the arcade for a good five hours.

Realising how much Minho must have spent on the day so far, Newt fished around in his pocket for his wallet as they left the arcade, walking out into the daylight. The sun burned his eyes as if he’d never seen light before, but managed to find a few notes. “How much was the food? I’ll give you he money back because I ate quite a bit here and the café earlier.”

Minho shook his head, placing his hand on the blond’s arm, trying to lower his wallet. “It was my treat. You don’t have to pay—“

“No, here’s twenty bucks. It’s probably not enough but it’s all I have on me right now. Honestly, please take it.” Newt took out the money and pushed it into Minho’s chest so he was forced to accept it.

“You didn’t have to pay me back.” Minho sighed, taking the money, putting it in his back pocket as they approached the car.

“I wanted to.” Newt said softly, opening his car door before Minho could do it for him. Once inside, he placed his cheek against the cool glass and sighed, running a hand through his hair lightly. After Minho got in and started the car, the blond reached over and squeezed the boy’s leg. “Thank you. I really enjoyed today.”

Looking at Newt’s hand, then up at his face, Minho smiled sweetly. “The day is still young. You wanna head back to mine?”

Newt thought about it for a second, bringing his hand back to his lap before nodding hesitantly. He shrugged, hoping Minho wouldn’t notice something different in his voice. “Sure.”

They drove off, putting on one of Minho’s many CD’s in the car; Newt liked Minho’s idea of music taste – he really didn’t care about genre, he believed it to be a stupid label to single out songs you ‘aren’t supposed to like’; he picked songs by tune and lyrics, whether that was pop, country or rock. Newt settled on a CD by _The Cure_ , reminding him of his time as a kid in England when his mother also played their songs whilst driving.

Catching Minho occasionally glancing over at him out of the corner of his eye, Newt wondered why it still made him blush. He wondered what it would be like if it was him glancing over at his girlfriend, and he shuddered at the thought. New knew now that he was gay. After struggling for a long time to come to terms with his sexuality, after everything he’d put himself through, he knew he was one hundred per cent into guys. He wasn’t singularly attracted to Thomas, as he thought he had been—or _‘Thomasexual’_ as Minho had once called it.

Suddenly Thomas filled his head and his mind flashed back to when the boy had walked in on him and Minho practicing kissing. Newt wondered if Minho wouldn’t have offered if he hadn’t been attracted to him at the time, but he also wondered what it would’ve been like if the brunet hadn’t walked in. Sure, he wasn’t attracted to Minho back then as such. Sure, the kiss had been enjoyable – and they still were – but he remembered his thoughts, about how he would’ve taken one kiss from Thomas over a thousand from Minho.

Newt didn’t realise they’d reached Minho’s house until the engine was switched off and the car halted to a stop, causing the blond to blink confusedly for a while, then undo his seatbelt to get out.

“Uh, are your parents home yet?”

“Nope, still out of town. It’s kind of lonely, but I survive.” Minho smiled softly and leaned across the car to kiss Newt gently before pulling back to grab the door handle. “Let’s go inside.”

Once inside, the air changed. He remembered how he had come here a mere week ago to throw out all his anger and sadness by using Minho for a stupid one-night stand. He knew that he was probably still using the boy, but he didn’t want to admit that to himself.

Minho threw his keys into the key bowl by the door and asked Newt if he wanted a drink or anything, offering tea, coffee or alcohol. Newt shook his head and said no, moving into the living room after taking his shoes off to sit on the couch. The jock flopped beside him as the blond brought his knees up to his chest, hugging them.

“Want to watch some TV? Let’s see what’s on…” Minho mumbled, flicking through a few channels. They settled on a rerun of _Friends_ and set the remote aside to settle and get comfy. Newt perked up enough courage to lay his head on the buffer boy’s chest, snuggling up as Minho wrapped an arm around his shoulders comfortingly. It was warm and peaceful, but short-lived as the boy stood up.

“Where are you going?” Newt pouted, pulling one of the sofa cushions to his chest to hug.

“I’m going to get us a blanket, just wait there.”

Watching Minho jog from the room, Newt counted to forty seconds before the boy returned with a familiar duvet. He stiffened a little as it was placed over them, the jock returning to his original position, guiding the blond to lie back on him once more. He didn’t resist.

As the show went on, Newt felt the light pressure of Minho’s lips on his cheek, inching forward ever so slowly towards his lips. Biting the inside of his cheek, Newt turned his face so it was easier for the boy to kiss him on the mouth. He felt Minho smile as their lips met and they started kissing slowly; Newt let him take the reigns in the embrace, feeling the trace of tongue against his lips before letting him in.

Both sighed at the intimate contact, Newt’s hand travelling up to tangle in Minho’s hair, messing it slightly. The boy huffed out a breath of hot air and shifted out from under Newt, so he was able to climb on top, their mouths parting for a while. He let himself be pushed down into the couch, lying there as his hand continued to fiddle and twirl the athlete’s dark locks in his fingers. Minho half straddled him and once more his tongue dived into Newt’s mouth, eliciting a noise from the blond’s throat; although he was enjoying the kiss, heart pounding and body burning, he didn’t want anything more than what they were doing.

He let out a shaky breath when Minho’s lips found his neck, kissing just below his jaw, close to his ear. He realised it was a newfound weak spot of his, and had to force himself to not let his eyelids roll back in his sockets. He made a muffled noise and then squeezed the boy’s arm to slightly push him away. “M… Minho…”

Hearing his name, the jock pulled away after nuzzling the boy’s neck, hands resting on Newt’s chest. The blond swallowed as he looked up at the sight before him: red, plump, shining lips on flushed olive skin, accompanied by messy hair, barely resembling his perfect, signature quiff.

“You okay?” Minho asked above him. He was smiling, but his eyes showed worry. “I won’t do anything you don’t want to. I would never.”

Newt nodded and blushed. “I don’t…”

“It’s okay. I just thought a steamy make-out session would be the perfect way to end the day. It doesn’t matter if you don’t want anything else.”

As Minho crawled off him, Newt sat up and hugged his knees again. His voice was low and he looked down at the fabric of the sofa. “I’m sorry if I ruined the day… I hope you understand.”

“Of course I do. I’m sorry if you weren’t comfortable with that kind of thing again. And you definitely did not ruin the day.”

“I should probably head home anyway – my mum is probably expecting me for dinner.”

Getting up instantly, Minho offered his hand to Newt. The blond took it and looked at their hands together as he was pulled up slowly from his sitting position. He let the corners of his mouth curl upwards in a small smile, huffing a breath out of his nose before making eye contact with Minho.

As he stared into the deep chocolate colour of his irises, Newt couldn’t help but feel bad. They were _together_ … and no matter how much he couldn’t quite bring himself to say it, they were _boyfriends_ , so why did he feel like there was something missing?

“I’ll drive you home, come on.” Minho offered, giving his hand a squeeze before they got ready to head out to the car; Newt practically glued to the boy’s side as the jock hesitantly wrapped a strong arm around his shoulders.

 

* * *

 

 

The car journey home was spent with them holding hands at any given moment, Minho singing along loudly to various songs on the radio as Newt grinned to himself. Yet, as the jock traced his thumb over the back of his hand, the blond felt that guilty feeling rise in his stomach as he knew he had ruined the date with his sudden mood change back at the boy’s house.

It wasn’t that he didn’t want to have sex with Minho again; it was just he wasn’t ready to once more. He knew it sounded stupid – they had slept together once, so why not again? Newt couldn’t help but think about his emotional state had driven him to do it, and he didn’t know if he was ready yet to get to that stage again on his own terms.

He still felt bad about it. Newt had used Minho to wash away his sadness, and he wanted the next time – whenever that happened to be – to be enjoyable and special… He wanted it to be with someone he loved and yearned for with all his heart. Newt liked Minho a _lot_ , but he didn’t love him just yet.

His first time felt like a lifetime ago.

Newt somehow held Minho’s hand a little tighter, the added pressure making the other boy turn to look at him in a slight confusion. “Newt? You okay?”

Licking his lips, the blond put on a smile as they neared his house. “Yeah, I’m great—today was great.”

Although looking unconvinced, Minho smiled back and raised Newt’s hand to his lips to kiss the back of it before letting go. “It was. We should make it a regular thing – not just going to the arcade, but going out more. I mean, if you’d like that?”

“Yeah,” Newt nodded. “I’d like that a lot.”

“I’ll arrange a few dates and things to do, and maybe you could too.”

The car pulled up in the driveway, turning the engine off so they could park for a little while. The light was on in Brenda’s room, alerting them to their presence and he began to prepare what he was going to say to his family about the note he’d left.

With a sigh, Newt turned and smiled gratefully at Minho, leaning in for a kiss. “Thank you so much for today—I mean it, I loved it so much.”

Their lips connected and the blond felt Minho’s hands cup his face as their mouths moved slowly against one another. Newt screwed his eyes shut, trying not to think about what his mother would say if she walked out right now and saw them, or if Thomas was sat on his roof watching.

They said their goodbyes once Newt was out of the car; Minho rolled down the window so they could kiss once more quickly, and Newt waved as the car reversed off the property.

Newt scurried into his house, fumbling with the keys in the lock before he walked in and headed for his room. He ran a hand through his hair as his mother called out a greeting from the lounge, but managed to get to his room without much hassle. He flopped face first onto his bed, hand clutching the pillow as he flipped his body, pressing it to his chest.

Without even thinking about it, Newt reached for his phone and dialled his most-called number, squeezing his eyes shut, biting his lip as he waited for the person to pick up. After four rings he heard a “Hello?” down the other end and Newt smiled softly, face relaxing.

“Hey, Tommy.”

The realisation that he missed Thomas hit him so suddenly that he puffed out a long breath.

“What’s up, man? Why are you calling me at like…” He heard Thomas pause, probably to check the time on the clock Newt knew was placed on his bedside table. “Seven in the evening? You okay?”

He hugged the pillow tighter to his chest and chuckled. “Yeah, I’m fine. Just wanted to hear how your day was.”

“That’s so sweet,” Thomas cooed, allowing the blond to picture the brunet pouting happily as they spoke. “But not much. Went out for lunch at Fry’s and he asked about you. How about yourself?”

 _Shit_ , Newt thought, he hadn’t been prepared for that question.

“Yeah, er,” He bit his lip. “It was good fun.”

“Brenda wasn’t a complete pain in the ass then?”

Newt frowned and then remembered the cover story he had told Thomas to stop him asking questions about where they were going. He shook his head. “No, she was fine. We just went out to town and got coffee. It was nice.”

“You got coffee for six hours? Well, in any case I’m glad you’re finally making up with her, bro.” Thomas chuckled lightly. “I’m tired as fuck right now.”

Smiling, Newt sat up and something in his closet caught his eye. He frowned as he got up and walked towards it. “Maybe you should get some rest.”

“Nah, I’m all good talking to you. What you up to this evening?”

“Think I’m gonna clean my room for a bit,” Newt muttered, tucking the phone between his ear and shoulder as he knelt down beside the tiny white ball of paper he had noticed.

Thomas laughed down the phone and Newt set him on speaker, placing the phone aside as he looked up to see more scrunched up papers overflowing from the top of a bag.

“I bet you just put me on speaker.” Thomas guessed, making Newt nod despite the fact the brunet couldn’t see him.

Rolling his eyes, a smile tugged at his lips. “You know me too well.”

Newt reached for the rucksack, pulling it closer to him along the carpet. He pulled it open with two hands to find it filled to the brim with paper. He tipped it out and near a hundred of the notes fell out onto the floor before him. It clicked then, that these were the notes Thomas had given to him in class when he was mad at the brunet for making out with Teresa. He let out a quick breath of disbelief, fingers reaching for one.

“What are you doing over there that made you breathe-slash-gasp like that…?” Thomas asked mockingly, reminding the blond that he was still on the phone with him. But, Newt ignored it as he opened the first note.

A grin tore at his mouth as he read the familiar scrawl of Thomas’ handwriting.

 

            **bro stop ignoring me it hurts**

 

“Tommy, you’re such a sap,” Newt breathed quietly, but accidentally loud enough that the person he was talking about could hear him down the phone.

“What was that?”

Newt cleared his throat. “Uh, nothing!”

“You just called me a sap!” The tone of voice sounded like the brunet was pretending to be offended.

Scoffing, he went to open another note, and another, and another.

 

            **i'm sorry**

**i’ll buy you dinner**

**:(**

**neeeeeeewt**

**forgive me and i’ll watch your lame shows**

**YOU’RE BEING REALLY CHILDISH**

**i'm super duper sorry**

**maybe i'm the childish one**

           

“You are the childish one.” Newt giggled, setting the note aside.

“What are you talking about?” Thomas asked quizzically, completely confused. “But seriously man, I’m not childish.”

“That’s a lie and you know it.”

 

            **miss you**

 

His mouth quirked upwards at the words on the paper. “Aw, Tommy. I miss you too.”

“Seriously, Newt,” Thomas tried to speak over the blond’s laughter. “What are you talking about?”

Newt placed a hand over his mouth and smiled into it, eyes closed and phone still to his side. He palm was muffling his happy giggling, but his eyes started to water from laughing and also the meaning behind the messages.

“Say you’re the childish one of the two of us and I’ll tell you.” He swallowed his laughter, moving the empty bag to the side so as he lay down it acted as a pillow.

Hearing Thomas groan as he picked up more unread messages, he repeated his words. His eyes glistened and lips spread wide into a smile as Thomas admitted. “Fine, I’m the childish one.”

Fingers pulled back the edges of the scrunched up paper and his eyes scanned the paper, still refusing to tell Thomas what he was reading. “Don’t any of these sound familiar to you?”

 

            **stop ignoring me :(**

 

“Nope.” Thomas stated, only to have Newt read a few more out until he heard the brunet gasp. “Those are my notes! From—from that time you ignored me before homecoming! Fuck… you still have those?”

“I actually never opened them,” the blond said sheepishly as he looked at the floor. Only one more note lay untouched, the hundred others all flattened and piled to the side. “Oh, look. Here’s the last one.”

Newt held the paper in his hand for a while, not un-scrunching it. It felt heavy in his hand despite the light weight of the material, but maybe he was just imagining it. So, wish a small smile on his lips, he opened it very slowly with just the tips of his fingers.

His eyes glassed over with tears as he processed the words of the note.

 

**i love you man. nothing can come between us – not even some stupid chick. please forgive me?**

 

Making a gasping noise he couldn’t help, Newt felt his heart thud undoubtedly fast in his chest, and it felt as if he were in that class again. He could feel the anger and the disappointment... he could only imagine what he would’ve felt if he had read the note back then.

“Oh, god. Tommy…”

Thomas’ voice was filled with concern and worry when he replied to him. “Newt?”

“I-I’m okay.” His voice shook down the line, but Newt tried to convince Thomas everything was okay as he read the last note once more in his head.

“Do you want me to come over?” The brunet offered, Newt able to picture the worry on his face, which sent a warm reassurance to him about how much Thomas cared.

“No, no. I’m okay, I promise. Besides, don’t you have that curfew?” Newt held the paper to his chest near his heart and closed his eyes.

“Yeah, but I would’ve come anyway. What happened just then?”

Newt considered whether he should tell the brunet about this final note or not. “I just… I never really realised how sensitive and persistent you could be.”

“Oh, shut up.”

Giggling, Newt moved the phone closer to where his head lay on the backpack and soon Thomas joined in the chuckle.

“Hey, come by my house tomorrow. My parents are dying to see you again.”

 _Come by my house tomorrow_. Newt chewed on his lip as he thought about the invite. He held the note tighter, eyes scanning the pile of paper beside him – the sight of them made him agree, letting his lip go from between his teeth.

“Great!” Newt heard the boy exclaim as he started to gather all the papers up, putting them in a container on his bedside table. He made a mental promise to stick them all onto something at some point. “I’ll see you tomorrow, Newtie! Good night!”

“Don’t call me ‘Newtie’!”

“All right, _Nathan_.”

“Thomas!” The line went dead, but despite his exclamation in horror at the use of his real name, the smile never faded from his face. He hadn’t been called Nathan in over six years; the only time it had been used was when Newt had decided to finally tell Thomas that he wasn’t actually named after an amphibian animal.

Covering his face with his hands like a bashful schoolboy, he felt the familiar flush on his face as he let out a happy sigh.

Newt tossed and turned that night, unable to stop the stupid smile on his face before he finally fell asleep.

 

* * *

 

 

_“You have to promise never to tell anyone this… ever! I mean it, Tommy!”_

_Newt swung his legs on the swing in the park. Eleven years old, still full of hope and joy, his biggest concern was that people would find out the first name he hated so much._

_“I promise!”_

_“Do you pinky promise?”_

_The small boy with the buzz cut stopped his violent swinging, dragging his feet along the floor to slow down to a stop. His doe eyes stared at the small outstretched finger before him that belonged to his best friend, wrapping his own pinky finger around it with a nod._

_“I pinky promise.”_

_“So, Newt isn’t exactly short for anything…” Newt began, taking in a deep breath. “But it’s what I was always called by my mum and dad, so it’s what I’ve always gone by.”_

_“They gave you a nickname after an animal?”_

_Shrugging, the blond fiddled with his fingers in his lap. “My dad was a biologist before he met my mum, and one of the animals he researched was Britain’s largest amphibian – the newt. Apparently, my mum said it had started off as a stupid joke calling me Newt, but it stuck and I liked it so much better than… Nathan.”_

_“Nathan?!”_

_Newt shushed Thomas, waving his hands about in front of his best friend’s face to quieten him down. His eyes scanned the empty playground for anyone that might have heard what was being said._

_“You don’t look like a Nathan at all.”_

_“It was my grandfather’s name. What do I look like then?”_

_He watched as the boy ran a hand over his chin, as if he were stroking a non-existent beard. His face was thoughtful until he grinned wide, dimples lighting up his face._

_“You look like a Bertha!”_

_Thomas darted off the swing after that, Newt chasing him on his heels, trying to catch him to play fight. He tackled the brunet, taking him to the ground as they rolled on each other, laughing and tickling through gasping breaths._

_“You… are never… allowed to call… me or tell anyone… that my name is Nathan, Tommy…” Newt felt Thomas push him off him from his straddled position on the boy’s chest, only to have Thomas now straddle him with fond eyes._

_“I pinky promised… didn’t I? Newt suits you better, anyway.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I WILL APOLOGISE NOW FOR THE LONG WAIT FOR THIS CHAPTER AND THE AMOUNT OF MINEWT IN IT i only hope the newtmas at the end and the flashback make up for the amount of minho and newt there was. BUT... i am revealing that this is most likely the last long chunk of minewt you will get so, for many of you it is happy days... i won't say why though hehehe  
> anyway, I MYSELF think minho is too cute and deserves some lovin', it's such a shame newt keeps questioning everything they do together sigh but on the other hand minho doesn't deserved to be used like this and newt is really struggling with how he feels. god dammit universe.  
> i won't say much about the notes and the flashback because i want to see what you guys think ;-)  
> i really hope this chapter is okay because as per usual it's HELLA un-beta'd and probably has tons of mistakes, so feel free to point them out in any comments you leave because as you know, comments are my favourite. i love you very much, see you in the next chapter when it will skip forward a couple of weeks, but you'll be getting an entire chapter of just newt and thomas being bros :-)
> 
> rosie
> 
> UPDATE // i might be meeting thomas sangster (omgmfnms) on monday and i'm going on holiday for two weeks from the 30th July-13th August so hopefully i'll update once more before then, but if not I will be writing on holiday and back posting to you after that date! Just thought I'd let you know in case you think I abandoned this fic ｡ﾟ✶ฺ.ヽ(*´∀`*)ﾉ.✶ฺﾟ｡


	21. twenty one

Newt woke up with a start to the ringing of his phone by his ear. He groaned, rubbing his eyes as he sat up, yawned in a sing-song fashion and reached drowsily for his cell.

"Hello?" Newt muttered with his groggy morning voice. He didn't need to look at his clock to know it was too early to be awake.

"Heeeeey, Newt!" It was Minho, chirpy as ever and full of life.

Checking for the actual time (7:34am... what was this boy _thinking_?) he ran a hand through his messy, sandy bed-hair and sighed. "Morning, Minho. What's up?"

"Did I wake you up?"

Newt pursed his lips, still tangling his fingers through his haphazard locks, a wince on his face as he rubbed his eyes and lied. "Nah."

"Oh, good! Hey, uh, I was wondering if you'd like to go out again today with me?" The offer was so sudden Newt almost said yes as a startled response; before he replied, the blond remembered that he had promised to hang out with Thomas today at his house, and he would never pass that up.

"Not sick of me after yesterday?"

A small chuckle filled Newt's ears like a melody. "I could never get sick of you."

The boy bit his lip, suddenly feeling bad for what he was about to say to possibly the sweetest boy he'd ever known. He scrunched his face up and pressed his index finger and thumb to his closed eyes. "Gah, Minho... Listen, I'm actually busy today with Tommy... I'm sorry..."

There was a small silence that passed over them before Newt spoke again, worried he'd said something bad and the jock was thoroughly upset about it. He repeated the boy's name in a questioning manner until hearing a cough on the other end, signalling Minho's presence.

"No, no, that's completely fine. Two dates in two days is probably a bit over the top anyway. Maybe next week... Have a great day. Tell Thomas I said hi, yeah?"

Newt felt his face fall a little, heart pounding and head whirring, trying to think of ways to not let his _boyfriend_ down. "W-we could totally go on another date on Saturday. Or go for coffee after school some time?"

"Or dinner? At the end of the month? I know a really great place!"

Smiling a small smile, Newt nodded to himself and stretched under his covers. "Yeah, I'd like that."

Talking for a while, booking days for dates with each other including the last Sunday of the month, their conversation then ended after half an hour when Newt bid Minho goodbye and ended the call. The last thing he heard before hanging up was a pen scribbling away at paper, the jock obviously writing down all the set dates - what did he ever do, Newt thought, to deserve him?

Settling back down to doze for a little while longer, Newt let himself fall asleep for another hour before his normal alarm rang. The usual routine took place: teenage boy takes a shower to wash away his teenage boy aroma, puts on fresh underwear and clothes and makes self look presentable. Newt decided to sit out on his roof, so he slid up the window and swung his legs out before his body followed close behind.

It was quite a chill, crisp morning and the sun was stuck behind a parade of clouds so it was moderately dark, not to mention it was now ten o'clock. He wasn't sure when Thomas would call to tell him to come over, but he reckoned it would be within the hour, so he pulled out a cigarette and lit it, careful to make sure his mother didn't see him. She knew he smoked, but wasn't aware of how frequently he now practiced the habit and if she didn't see him, she didn't worry - that was all he asked for.

Newt sat quietly on his roof for the good part of half an hour (his cigarette had been discarded within the first five minutes) before Thomas arrived in his car and smiled up at him, making his way up the porch and onto the roof next to him. It shocked the blond at his presence, but as his side came into contact with the brunet, a sudden warm, welcome heat flooded his body and he was calm.

"Good morrow, my friend. And may I say it is quite a welcome surprise to see you up on the roof like this of your own accord. It's becoming a nice regular routine." Thomas warbled, very happy and excitable.

"I didn't realise you'd be over here," Newt confirmed, sliding his phone out of his pocket. "I thought you'd call and tell me to come over."

"Nah, I came to give you a lift."

Looking at him with a raised eyebrow, Newt shook his head and failed to hide the smile on his lips. "You didn't have to do that."

"But I wanted to. Besides, my mom said I should, so there."

"So," The blond smirked, catching on to what he was saying. "Basically you didn't actually want to give me a lift, your mum just made you."

"Well, technically n... maybe. But I'm here now, so let's go! Mom's dying to see you, even more so since homecoming."

Jerking at the mention of not only Thomas' mother but also homecoming, he swallowed and pushed back the sick feeling in his stomach that accompanied memories of them spontaneously kissing on stage in front of hundreds of their peers once they'd been crowned. It felt as if it were only yesterday. Still, Newt covered his feelings by blinking and opening his mouth to speak.

"God, that's true. When was the last time I even stepped foot in your house?" At this point, the blond got up to return inside to grab his bag and any extra stuff he wanted to bring: wallet, phone charger, _et cetera_...

Thomas leant against the wall as he followed his best friend inside and watched him stuff things into his bright blue rucksack. His arms were folded loosely across his chest and he moved his mouth around as he thought. "Probably my birthday in November. So, a few months ago."

"What do you have planned for us today anyway?" The blond bit his lip as he tugged a coat out of the wardrobe, leaving the empty hanger swinging wildly. As he turned around and pulled on his coat, he observed Thomas' hands fall back to his sides.

Shrugging, the brunet ran a hand over the back of his neck and through the hair there - Newt knew it was getting too long and that the boy would have to have it cut soon. "I was thinking maybe watch a couple of movies and play on my old _Game Cube_ to laugh at the crappy graphics? If you want to, of course..."

"Yeah," Newt grinned, pushing his arm into one of the coat sleeves. "I'd like that. Need me to bring any DVDs?"

They decided on a few action films they had bought a while ago and never got around to watching before they were both heading down the stairs (at Newt's insistence) for the door. They heard a bedroom door opening upstairs and the blond tried to hurry Thomas along, but to no avail.

At the sound of a cough and a clearing of a throat, the two boys whipped their heads round to observe at the top of the stairs, Brenda, all decked out in long, pink checkered pyjamas. She rubbed her eyes and pulled her messy hair over her shoulder, combing her fingers through it.

"Where are you two sneaking off to so early?" She looked at Newt, pursing her lips in wonder.

"Off to Tommy's for the day to just watch some DVDs and stuff. I'll be back later and I'll give mum a call to let her know when I'll be back."

With a tap of her foot, Brenda nodded and raised a hand to half-greet the brunet. "Nice to see you, Thomas."

Thomas waved a hand back at Brenda and smiled toothily. "You too, Brenda. Did you enjoy your outing with Newt yesterday?"

Time stood still. Newt was sure he had never swallowed as hard as he did, the saliva lodged in his throat like a stopper on a bottle. He hadn't told Brenda about his alibi yet, she didn't know what to tell Thomas, he was going to find out he was lying to him.

Apparently, Brenda saw the panic in his eyes, as the brunette smiled and nodded, the confused crease between her eyebrows disappearing. "Yeah, we had a lovely time. It was a nice change from us bickering."

Smart, she didn't mention what they'd actually been doing, just caught onto the fact it involved the two of them. Newt's uneasiness slightly went away and he took a deep breath, smiling as genuinely at Thomas as he could manage. "What, you didn't believe me when I said the coffee outing was civil?"

Thomas held his hands up in surrender and chuckled, shaking his head. "I was genuinely curious as to what Brenda thought of the day out. I'm glad it was as nice as you two make it out to be."

The two of them bid farewell to Brenda, and as the brunet headed to the door, Newt glanced back at his stepsister to mouth the most heartfelt ' _thank you_ '. The girl smiled and nodded, heading for the bathroom as the blond joined his best friend outside on the porch.

Before they knew it, they were inside Thomas' mother's car, on their merry way to the brunet's house. As if Thomas didn't seem happy enough, the boy connected his phone to the stereo and blasted out a few old chart toppers that they hadn't heard in years. Newt bellowed out laughter as the brunet danced along, singing and tapping the wheel with his long fingers.

"Tommy, keep your hands on the bloody steering wheel!" He warned through fits of laughter, eyes never leaving the boy's hands. He remembered the feel of them between his own, how they fit together as if by design and how much he missed being able to reach out at school and just take his hand in his.

Rolling up to the Murphy household was what snapped Newt out of his dream; the music turned off and the two unbuckled their seat-belts before Thomas darted out to unlock the front door, leaving Newt momentarily by the car.

He soon found himself by Thomas' side as they stepped into the house, the familiar vintage interior design very much a sight for sore eyes. His own house was too gaudy for his liking, his mother's tastes always trying to be more showy than they really were as a family - it was home, but it wasn't a _home_. Thomas' cosy, old house felt very homelike, and Newt adored everything about it.

"Where are your parents?" He asked as he shuffled out of his coat and Thomas took it to hang it by the door. The usual hustle and bustle of the Murphy's was the first thing you'd hear when walking into their house, but at the moment it was silent bar the two of them moving around.

Thomas took off his shoes and ran a hand through his longer hair as he came to stand side-by-side with Newt. "Gone out weekly shopping. They should be back within the next hour. D'you want anything to drink?"

Newt nodded, following his best friend past the old-fashioned telephone and ancient oak table in the hallway, through the dining room which inhabited a fully-operational fireplace, into the slightly more modern kitchen. He leant over the countertop, watching as Thomas bent over to reach into the refrigerator to retrieve two cans of soda, giving Newt a nice view of his ass in the khakis he was wearing. He made sure to look away and cover his blush when the can was opened and handed to him.

The two shuffled to the lounge, falling onto the threadbare sofa that lined the wall of the large room. Newt huddled himself in the corner of the vintage couch, pulling his knees up as he sipped the drink, whereas Thomas sprawled out across the furnishing, one leg draped over the back of the sofa.

"Hey, Newt. Do you remember the time when we tried to bake cookies here around age eleven?" The voice filled the blond's head, painting a picture of the two of them being left unsupervised for less than ten minutes whilst Mrs Murphy took a work call, and the two of them decided to try and make chocolate chip cookies from scratch without instructions. They had chucked all kinds of random items into a bowl including flour, washing up soap, bread and (of course) chocolate chunks the size of satsumas.

The horrible but funny memory made the blond giggle into his can, pulling away to hide his smile in his hand. "And you nearly scorched your eyebrows off? How could I ever forget."

Thomas had slid the bowl of their cookie mixture into the oven, and turned on the gas for the top cookers by accident. When he pressed the lighter for the oven, his face was very close to the gas cookers up the top and one burst into flame, almost taking off the brunet's eyebrow. Mrs Murphy had been less than pleased, but never shouted. She ended up making a joke out of it herself; Newt loved her and sometimes wished his mother was more like that.

In the time he had spent reminiscing on past events, Thomas scooted nearer so he was now sat next to the blond at a very short distance. He noticed that they were sitting closer than usual, but pushed it aside as the brunet got up to turn on the television and old games console. He took a sip of his drink as Thomas connected the controllers, putting in an old _Mario Kart_ game they hadn't seen or played in so many years. The sight of it elicited a cheer from Newt's mouth, and the brunet turned, grinned and leapt across the room back onto the sofa.

"Hell, if I'd known you were this excited to play _Mario Kart_ , man," Thomas selected the multiplayer option on the home screen and the two picked their characters and karts. "I would've had you round sooner."

"We hardly had the time. Now shut up and drive, Tommy."

Before they knew it, the old-pixellated game began and Newt as _Yoshi_ sped off in front of Thomas as _Donkey Kong_. However, soon after the game began, the brunet held the lead for a lap, chuckling and cheering himself on until Newt lobbed a green shell at him from second and overtook the boy; he jabbed at his side with a finger also, securing him the win. He came first, with Thomas falling back in third.

"You're such a cheater!" Thomas grumbled playfully, and the blond gasped.

"Says you, who constantly likes to throw me off. Besides, you love me." Newt giggled, not realising what he had said as he shoved his controller into the brunet's chest before getting up to fetch another drink. Once in the kitchen, he leant against the side and ran a hand over his face. _You love me_. Those words reminded him of what Thomas had texted him all those weeks ago, when he was still falling for the boy each and every day.

Retrieving another can of soda from the fridge, he shook his head at his thoughts and gulped down the icy drink as he reentered the lounge. Running a hand through his hair, Newt heard his stomach grumble - a result, most likely, due to him not consuming breakfast that morning.

"Hey, can we order something in? As you can probably tell from the monster growling in my belly, I'm hungry." The blond chuckled, trying to earn a laugh from his best friend, but no response came. He frowned, walking further into the living room so he was looking directly at his friend's face. "Tommy?"

"Huh? Oh, did you say something?" The boy startled, blinking a few times before staring up at Newt with a dazed expression on his face. He'd obviously just been woken up from a far away place in a daydream, which is why he hadn't responded. Newt wondered what was on his mind.

Earning another giggle from Newt, he took his seat beside Thomas once more. "I said I'm hungry, so do you want to order something in, or should I try and make something myself? The latter may not be good seeing as we know how well that went last time."

It was the brunet's turn to run his hand through his hair now, nodding as he did. "Sure, sure, I'll order something in. What do you fancy?"

"Anything really. How about pizza?"

"I just realised, it's not even midday yet. You really wanna get pizza at this hour?" There was a pause and the two just looked at each other, a grin appearing on both their faces.

"Absolutely."

Thomas shook his head and laughed, jumping up off the sofa to rifle through a few flyers stuffed away in the cabinet draws. He snatched up the landline phone with one hand and a decent looking flyer with the other, before scanning the paper to dial the number on it.

"Yo, Newt. What pizza would you like? I'm getting pepperoni."

"Hawaiian sounds really good right about now!" The blond called back, putting the game into single player so he could occupy the time efficiently. He presumed the company had picked up as Thomas began muttering either to them about the orders or to himself. He hoped it was the prior and that his best friend didn't find talking to an imaginary friend more interesting than talking to him. Either way, the call soon ended and Thomas plonked himself back on the sofa beside Newt.

"So, what do you want to do whilst we wait for the food? He said it would take about twenty to thirty minutes to arrive." He scooted closer to the blond, watching the screen as Newt drove his character past the finish line in first. "They probably think we're mad for ordering this early."

Giggling, Newt put down the controller and shrugged - the company was making money, they probably didn't care in the slightest that they were ordering pizza before midday. "Let's just hang out in your room, maybe?"

"Yeah," Thomas started, going to turn off the television before turning back to Newt. For a split second, the blond thought that he was going to offer his hand for him to take, but Newt found himself standing and following Thomas before he could think properly.

As they entered the bedroom, Newt let out a breath of air. "It's not changed at all."

His eyes scanned the familiar setting around him: double bed propped against the wall, tall window standing over it. Blue sheets lay ruffled on the mattress, pyjamas discarded at the foot of the bed. The carpet was fairly clean, aside from the patch of orange by the bedside table where Newt vaguely remembered a glass of orange juice being spilt alongside a packet of _Doritos_ at a sleepover they had; they'd never been able to get the stain out. The walls were a plain white, nothing special decorated them except for a floating cabinet that held a few books and trophies Thomas had won in his life. It was completely different from the vintage-antique-retro- _unusual_ look his parents were going for with the rest of the house. It was so _Thomas_.

The slam of the door caused Newt to tear his eyes back to the brunet, who was chuckling to himself before throwing his weight onto his messy bed. "You really think I would've redesigned my room in just a few months?"

"You could've."

"Yeah, but I would've told you about it."

Newt cocked his head shyly to the side, pacing over to the oak cabinet. He curled his long fingers around a trophy on the lower shelf, tall and golden, still shining from all the times the brunet polished it. A swell of happiness washed over him as he read the plate etched into the mount: 'Winner, 2008 Sports Day'. A list of events that Thomas had won were written beneath in small font, but Newt smiled at the mention of the three-legged race, that he and the brunet had won together just before the accident that sprained his leg.

"Oh my god," he grinned from ear to ear, running his thumb over the metal structure. His sudden exasperated exclamation caused Thomas to look up curiously at his best friend. "We were so competitive."

"I know. Our pre-pubescent selves were running on sugar. I think I was faster back then than I was now - and we made a great team." Newt set the trophy back on the shelf as the brunet spoke, turning to him to see Thomas beaming at him. "We still do."

What Newt would have given just then to stride over and kiss that stupidly handsome smile off his face... Instead, he paced over to the bed, settling himself down on the mattress, before swinging his legs on and lying back beside Thomas. He nestled into the mass of pillows and exhaled, only to have the boy to his side also move, placing his head on Newt's thigh as if it were a cushion.

After a long silence of them lying there, fingers playing with the crumpled mess of duvet beneath them, Newt heard Thomas whisper so quietly, gently as if he hadn't really intended to speak the words out loud. "So many things have changed."

Newt wished the brunet hadn't have lain on him or said that, his heart rate increasing enough so he began to hear the blood pumping in his ears. But, he drew in a breath and let it out again slowly, nodding as he replied. "Maybe they've changed for the better."

"Yeah, maybe." Thomas mumbled, only the top of his head and beautiful nose able to be seen by the blond as they lay where they were. "I wonder if people still talk about us."

Licking his lips, Newt screwed his hands into the duvet to try and ease the want— _need_ to run them through the brown locks just inches from him. He cleared his throat. "I don't know. I mean, it's kind of hard not to talk about the only out "gay couple" in the city, even if they're no longer together." He swallowed and waited patiently for Thomas' reaction, unsure of what he would say.

"Yeah. Yeah, that makes sense." The boy sounded uncomfortable to Newt, but as he was about to say something else, the blond shuffled and spoke.

"Well, you got us into this mess." He laughed jokingly, hoping to break the tension they'd created. The brunet shifted slightly and tilted his head backwards so they were looking at each other upside down, a smile plastered onto Thomas' face. When the boy wouldn't stop looking at him, Newt couldn't help but flush furiously as he gazed into his chestnut doe eyes. "What?"

Thomas rubbed his lips together and shook his head. "Nothing. I just— it doesn't matter." He sat back up and ascended from the bed to walk around the room, stretching; until they heard the doorbell ring minutes later, signalling the arrival of their pizza. Thomas left the room to answer the door and collect the pizzas whilst Newt remained upstairs, wondering what the hell had just happened.

The thought was soon gone though as the boy returned to the room carrying two large, cardboard pizza boxes, with two more soda cans balanced on top. Newt cheered in delight, carefully taking one of the holders from his best friend's arm. "Finally!"

"I still can't believe you're hungry for pizza at this time. Luckily the delivery guy didn't give me that weird of a look. He's obviously seen a lot worse." Thomas chuckled, settling down on the floor with his back propped up against the bed.

"Pizza's good at any time - and I agree. He's probably answered the door to some weirder things than a handsome, brown haired teenager that ordered at whatever-o'clock in the morning to satisfy his own and his amazing comrade's craving for pepperoni and Hawaiian."

"Touché."

Newt scrambled to open the box, pulling out a slice of his ham and pineapple topped pizza before shoving it in his mouth. The flavour brought his senses to life and he moaned slightly at how good it tasted, even this early in the morning (what time was classified as "too early" for pizza anyway?). The blond's eyelids fluttered closed as he chewed, so unbelievably glad of this life decision.

He heard Thomas clear his throat at the noise, grabbing his soda to open and take a swig. Newt reopened his eyes and noticed the other pizza box lay unopened. He frowned as he pulled open the dip that came alongside the food, dipping his crust in.

"Not having any pizza?"

"Not yet." Thomas shook his head, tapping his hand on his leg. "Maybe in a little while. You enjoy yours though."

"Oh, I am."

Soon hereafter, there was a sound down the stairs of his house and the brunet jumped to his feet, almost startling Newt. He looked up to see Thomas with a wide grin on his face, setting the soda down before he began walking to the bedroom door. "That must be my parents. I'll check to see if they need any help with the shopping. Be back in a minute!"

Newt watched as Thomas disappeared from the room, before he could say that he would be happy to help the Murphy's with their unpacking so it was done faster. But the boy was gone in a flash, leaving him to finish his slice of pizza and listen to the sound of footsteps, alongside the voices of Lisa and Darren Murphy, Thomas' parents. He slowly made his way towards the landing anyway, peering over the bannisters at the family below, smiling and embracing with their bagged shopping around their feet. Newt adored the sight of Thomas with his parents - it was like the brunet was an entirely different person with his family and was happy to be affectionate with them unlike many boys his age.

He then heard Thomas mumble something and mention his name, looking up the stairs to the blond. Lisa and Darren's eyes then followed, landing on Newt with smiles on their faces. Thomas' mother let out a cry of joy and held her arms out to Newt as the blond began to descend the stairs, walking into her embrace happily. Over her shoulder he could see the brunet beaming at him, making his heart flutter in his chest as he squeezed his best friend's mother. Darren clapped him on the back and then, laughing, brought him in for a hug too.

"Ooh, we missed you, Newt. Look at how much you've grown!" Lisa clasped her hands together in front of her face in joy. "My precious boys."

"Mom, you're saying that like you haven't seen Newt in years and he's just returned from the war." Thomas ruffled his hair, moving closer to the blond's side now. Newt couldn't wipe the smile off his face.

"Maybe not years, but he certainly has changed in the few months I haven't seen him!" She placed a hand on the side of his cheek, carefully caressing the skin there in a motherly way. "He's become very handsome. Not that he wasn't handsome before, of course - you just look like a man now, and you've really grown into yourself."

Nodding, Newt felt the hand leave his cheek and he blushed at her kind words, noticing Thomas observing him as if he were seeing him in a whole different light. He cleared his throat and said how good it was to see both of them after so long, and that Thomas was stupid for not inviting him around sooner.

Lisa waved her hand in front of her face, "You don't need Thomas to invite you, dear. You know you are welcome to come around here any time, day, whenever you want."

"I agree, you can come round whenever you so wish," Darren piped up, placing his arm around his wife's waist. "But, anyway, how have you been since we last saw you, Newt?"

He cast a glance at Thomas beside him, who was staring at his shoes as he scuffed the worn wooden floor. Once his eyes parked on him, Thomas looked up and smiled, causing him to turn away quickly. "I've been, er, great. A lot of stuff has happened, you know?"

"It's such a shame you two broke up," Darren sighed, Lisa nodding beside him, pulling her bottom lip into her mouth sadly. "But we're glad you're still best friends. The kind of relationship you two had is often ruined by splitting up, so it's wonderful you're still the same as always."

 _Ha_ , Newt thought, nodding along with his best smile, _if only they knew the truth._

"Thomas never did tell us why you two decided it was best to end it and remain friends. Did he, hon?" Lisa looked up at her husband, who shook his head and they turned their eyes to their son, who swallowed and rubbed the back of his neck.

"It really doesn't matter, mom. Let's just _not_ , right now." Newt felt Thomas insist beside him, putting his hand on the blond's arm to take him away. He frowned, it was unusual for Thomas not to tell his parents everything - they were extremely close. Newt supposed this was different - Thomas had never been in a proper relationship before, and the fact his parents enthusiasm was for their fake romance may have made him uncomfortable and unable to tell them the truth.

As Newt was directed back up the stairs by Thomas, Darren called out to him and he turned. "Why don't you stay for dinner?  We'd love to catch up properly when my boy isn't pulling you away."

Newt accepted gladly before Thomas said goodbye to his parents and they raced back up the stairs to eat their pizza. And that was how their day went: pizza eating (though multiple pieces of Thomas' food were snatched by his parents, laughing in a fake-maniacal fashion that made Newt giggle), playing old almost-forgotten games on the _GameCube_ , watching action films they'd never seen - the pair of them favouring one about this group trapped in a maze with no way of escape. It was simple, like the old times, but not. Many points during the day Newt would find himself gazing at the side of Thomas' face, and then shake himself out of his thoughts when he remembered Minho's smile and voice and body and... dinner arrived on the table before anything else happened.

 

* * *

 

This became a regular Sunday routine: during the week, Thomas would often come round Newt's after school to hang out and work on the yearbook, deciding on an online submittal system to collect all the quotes. Minho would sometimes take him out on dates, and vice versa - usually on Wednesday and Saturday - and they would smile and laugh and Newt would think, _maybe I can still try and fall in love with him_ as they kissed so passionately it genuinely made Newt's stomach somersault _._ Then on Sunday, Newt would pack things into a large rucksack and spend most of the day at the brunet's with his family, having an equally amazing time.

On the last Sunday of the month, three weeks later, when the Murphys and Newt were all settling round the table for dinner, the blond pulled out his phone to text his mother as usual to tell her he'd be back late. Only this time, a message notification popped up, buzzing and vibrating in his hand.

 

**Minho: hey I got a place for our dinner tonite at 8!!**

**Minho: what time should I pick u up?**

_Shit_ , Newt thought, swallowing with eyes wide before excusing himself to go to the bathroom. He rushed there, locking the door quickly before he sat down on the closed lid of the toilet seat. He had completely forgotten to note down that tonight he and Minho were going on a big dinner date, he'd been too focused on Sunday's being the typical day he would spend with Thomas and his family.

He opened the contacts app, scrolling to find Minho's number before pressing the call button. Newt pressed the phone to his ear, tapping his leg whilst his free hand was pressing his index finger and thumb against his screwed shut eyes.

"Hey, Newt. You dressed yet? Because I think I may be too overdressed, despite the restaurant being quite fancy and all that." Minho's voice rang out of the phone as soon as he picked up, and Newt could hear him ruffling through some stuff in his house in preparation. He felt slightly sick.

Running his hand over his face, Newt then held the back of his neck as the guilt washed over him. "M-Minho. I, uh, I don't think I can make it to the dinner tonight..."

The sound of movement down the line stopped, just like Newt's heart for a second. "Can I ask you why?" The jock's tone of voice sounded surprised, curious, disappointed and most of all, heartbreakingly sad. Yet, it was soft, making the blond feel even worse.

"I'm at Tommy's and his parents always ask if I want to stay for dinner, and it's like autopilot for me to say yes..." Newt paused, feeling tears start to brim behind his eyes. "So, I said yes and the food's all ready, and even if I went now to go home and get changed we'd be late for the booking and... I completely forgot we were supposed to go out today. Minho, I'm so sorry."

Minho sighed over the phone, and Newt wanted to erupt into a million apologies, saying sorry over and over until his tongue was numb, no matter how useless his words would be. Then Minho spoke again, making Newt feel utterly wretched. He had never meant to hurt the boy...

"It's okay. I'll cancel the booking, no worries. Just, uh, say hi to Thomas and his parents for me."

Minho immediately hung up before Newt could say another word.

The blond shook his head, lowering the phone to his lap slowly. His heart ached and he felt a sudden nausea creep over him as well as hatred for himself. Newt was dating Minho, yet this slip up probably meant the Asian thought he had chosen Thomas over him, which wasn't... _entirely_ true. Tears burned his eyes as a few fell down his cheek, his hand moving up to wipe them away as he sniffed sadly. He had never wanted to hurt Minho, but the sound of his voice down the phone confirmed he had.

Smacking his forehead once he had ceased his small cry, Newt stood up, flushed the toilet for good measure, washed his hands and exited the bathroom to rejoin the Murphy family around the table. He slid into his seat beside Thomas as the brunet placed a forkful of his already half-eaten pasta dish into his mouth, then went to dish out Newt's portion onto his plate. He hadn't realised he'd been gone that long.

"Everything all right?" Lisa asked as she smiled at the boy and Newt nodded.

"Just got a bit of a stomach ache. I'm fine."

They ate for a while, and as Thomas' parents began laughing to each other about a joke, the brunet leant over to Newt and tilted his head. "Who was it on the phone?"

Newt muttered under his breath, body still aching in guilt. "Just Minho."

"Oh," Thomas sighed as they went to eat, Newt forcing the pasta down as he was no longer hungry. They all talked as they ate their meal, but the blond's mind was somewhere else. He forced a smile and contributed occasionally to the conversation, but they all knew he was quieter than usual.

Halfway through the meal, Thomas took Newt's hand from on the table, prompting the blond to look at him. He looked up at the boy with a confused, yet still slightly somber expression. Thomas let go of his hand and tilted his head to the side as he furrowed his eyebrows together, sensing something was up. He lowered his voice so it was only audible to the pair of them under his parents' conversation. "You okay, Newt? Seriously?"

Newt swallowed the food in his mouth and looked around at the faces occupying the table, mainly focusing on Thomas' wide eyes. He nodded and smiled, only to have Thomas frown a little more for a few seconds and then turn away with the same expression on his face.

The blond tried his best to push his guilt aside, speaking up a little more after dinner as they played a game of _Uno_ and watched television. Eventually when it got to ten o'clock, Newt decided it was probably best he headed back home, despite Lisa's weekly offer to have him sleep round. Refusing politely, he stood to gather his things, the rest of the family helping him pack up his bag and grab his coat for him. Darren held out the jacket and the blond slipped into it with a thanks on his lips. Both Thomas' parents kissed him on the cheeks as Thomas grabbed the keys to his car, shuffling and stuffing his hands in his pockets before walking him out. Newt thanked them once again for dinner, and said he'd see them soon before he got into Thomas' family's car and the brunet drove him home.

Newt tapped his phone on his lap nervously the whole journey. He had sent Minho a few texts trying to suggest days they could go out on dates to make up for that evening, but the jock hadn't responded as yet. He continued the tapping until he felt a hand placed over his to calm him down, and as Newt looked up from the hand, he saw Thomas looking worriedly over at him.

"I know I asked you before, but are you _sure_ you're sure you're okay?"

The blond looked back down at the hand covering his, resisting the strong urge to turn his palm around so their fingers could intertwine. "I'm fine."

Thomas gave Newt's hand a gentle, reassuring squeeze before returning it to the wheel. The blond swallowed and let the music in the car drown out the silence between them for the rest of the journey. He wished he could pluck up the courage to tell Thomas everything about Minho and what he'd been feeling and thinking and maybe, just maybe, the boy could help him make sense of it all. But he didn't have the bravery, and he didn't want to risk losing Thomas even more than he already had, on top of hurting Minho.

They bid their goodbyes once they arrived at the Isaac-Despain household, Newt waving at Thomas as the brunet backed up the vehicle and drove home. The blond's mind raced just then with thoughts of how weird Thomas had been acting recently, ever since they'd reconciled their friendship. He didn't know what it was and Newt ran his hand through his hair with a sigh before he went inside.

He greeted his mother and Steve with a small smile as they were sat on the couch together, a glass of wine in Anne's hand. They acknowledged him before he hung up his coat, kicked off his shoes and carried his bag up to his room. He chucked it on his bed and went to the bathroom to get ready to sleep.

As he was brushing his teeth, Brenda entered to do the same, swiping up her pink toothbrush as Newt squeezed the toothpaste onto his own blue one. She did the same and they began brushing in synchronisation, looking in the mirror above the sink.

"You going to tell me where you went that day you used me as an excuse to lie to Thomas?" Brenda asked as she spat her first load of toothpaste out of her mouth after a minute, her lips fairly clear of the foam.

As Newt spat, he didn't have quite the same clean look to him, the toothpaste giving him an unusual upper-lip and lower-lip moustache-beard combo. He put the brush back into his mouth but didn't continue cleaning. "I went out with Minho on a date. Why bring it up now?"

Brenda shrugged, looking at him in the mirror. "Curious. And you look kinda the same today as you did back then. Have you told Thomas about Minho yet?"

Newt shook his head, brushing his teeth to give him an excuse not to talk, only making him feel guiltier at the mention of the two boys. Why and when had his life become a lying game?

"Jesus, Newt. You've been going out with Minho for a little over a month and you still haven't told your best friend? The longer you go without telling him, the worse his reaction will be, you realise that?" Brenda lectured him, leaving Newt staring in shock at how motherly his stepsister had become. "I get it's hard and all that, but once you tell him it will be out in the open. Unless there's a reason you've still not announced to Thomas or anyone that you're even seeing the most popular guy in school? I've seen him turn away loads of pretty girls y'know - Minho. Girls that any guy in school would die to even have approach him about homework. And no one knows why - his friends all smack him and scold him for not 'tapping that' and he can't tell them, he just shrugs and laughs it off. He likes you, a hell of a lot, Newt; it's pretty darn obvious if you ask me. He's prepared to be ridiculed by his friends and judged for not accepting people's offers to date him, all for you, and you won't even give him the relief of telling anyone that you're together." Newt flinched at her words. "I love you like you're my biological brother, Newt, but you're being ridiculous. He's doing this for you and it's gotta be hurting him, and yet you're here, happy to tell me in secret that you're going out but not the whole world, not Thomas. I don't know what's going on in your head - whether you're scared of what Thomas will say or do in reaction - but don't you think they both deserve to know? Minho deserves to be able to tell his friends the reason why he's turning people away if he wants, and Thomas deserves to know - as your best friend and ex-boyfriend - who you're seeing instead of using me as a lie every time you go on a date. That's only fair, right?"

He'd stopped brushing completely now, the toothbrush hanging loosely out of the side of his mouth. Newt stood still as Brenda finished brushing and rinsed her mouth out, washed her face and bid him goodnight as she retreated to her room. It took a couple of blank minutes for Newt to finish up his own night time routine, rinsing and spitting before washing his own face.

Everything she had said had been true. All of it. The guilty feeling engulfed him completely then, causing him to hold the edge of the sink so tightly his knuckles turned white. He squeezed his eyes shut to focus on breathing and stopping his head raging with thoughts that were beginning to give him a headache. Why hadn't he told Thomas about Minho, or finally given the jock the "green light" to tell people about their relationship? Was he scared about the brunet's reaction, or was it because he knew, deep down, he still had hope that he stood a chance with Thomas, even though it was obvious he didn't?

He threw even more cold water over his face, then made his way back into his room, turning the light off on his way in. Newt shuffled down under the covers, feeling ill with guilt and all the things Brenda had put in his head to think about. He really wasn't ready for school again the next day.

Reaching for the phone that was charging on his bedside table, Newt texted Minho once more, apologising again for not being able to make their promised dinner date, with an added message telling him he'd make it up to him somehow. He bit his lip before pressing send and placing the phone back on the table.

Newt ran his hands over his face, squeezing his eyes shut so his forehead wrinkled. Everything was so messed up. He felt such a strong sense of regret, but was also so glad he had spent time with Thomas, as he always did. But, he wanted more than anything to fall in love with the jock and be able to just be satisfied with being Thomas' best friend. Yet, the things he felt as usual denied him the ability, and he didn't know what it all meant.

Staring up at the ceiling for what felt like hours, Newt tried to count sheep to help him fall asleep. He got to over one thousand before the sheep that jumped over the fence in his mind began to drown out his main thoughts, turning black as the blond let his eyelids fall shut. He slept then, uneasiness consuming his dreamland.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so i'm back from my holiday/vacation and Yes I DID MEET THOMAS ON THE 27TH OF JULY AND HE WAS WONDERFUL AND LOVELY AND I MISS HIM SO MUCH i took so many photos and i have to tell you it's weird writing newt now that we're acquaintances hehe  
> ANYWAY this chapter is kinda shoddy (i think) because my mum was so annoying and told me to come away from my ipad all holiday. but i managed to write this and ANOTHER CHAPTER that i'll maybe post tomorrow (which i think you'll all enjoy, fingers crossed!) but for now hopefully theres newtmas here, the crumbling of other relationships and some good old newt/brenda.  
> i missed you all tons and i can't wait to finish this fic over the next few weeks (i may write up to 27 chapters rather than 26 but still - only 5/6 left!) :-) thank you for sticking with this over the break! As you all know comments and constructive criticism are always welcome since this is very unbeta'd :-)
> 
> NEXT CHAPTER WE SEE THE RETURN OF MS AGNES. i hope you're all ready for that and some other surprises coming your way tomorrow
> 
> rosie


	22. twenty two

It all happened just as Newt thought things couldn't be going better with Minho: the jock had looked past the blond's slip up as he went to visit the Asian at his house, apologising in person rather than over a stupid cell phone. Minho had understood, but Newt knew where he was coming from as he explained the insecurities he had, making the blond’s heart grow weary at his words. They'd gone on more dates (Newt made sure to set reminders and add them to his calendar both electronic and paper so he wouldn't miss any), and everything that Brenda had said to him had stuck; he almost felt as if he was happy and stable enough to tell Minho they could announce they were together, and he could pluck up the courage to tell his doe eyed best friend that he wasn't single... and hadn't been for a little over two months now.

But of course, nothing was ever straightforward in his life, Newt thought as he and Thomas walked together from their last period class, heading for the ICT suite to put a final touch to their section of the yearbook. That was when they spotted her: Teresa Agnes, dressed as if she were about to walk a runway, striding down the almost empty hall next to Sonya and Harriet, who appeared to now be her 'minions'. The sight of her from all the way down the corridor made Newt's stomach turn and twist into a knot as she approached, although she hadn't appeared to notice the pair of them yet. The more he thought about it, the more it bugged him as to where the supposed Queen Bee had been since the night of the dreaded, failed threesome. He had earlier come to the conclusion that she must have moved school, but the sight of her in that moment erased that possibility and made him wonder as to why he thought up such a stupid, hopeful excuse; Newt blamed it on his impossible feelings for Thomas.

"Newt? Are you listening to me?"

Snapping back to reality, Newt turned his head to look at his best friend walking by his side, peeling his eyes off the black haired beauty headed their way. Thomas furrowed his eyebrows and rejigged the position of his bag strap on his shoulder, giving the blond a confused look. Newt deducted that either he hadn't spotted Teresa or was playing off like he hadn't. Either way, he hadn't heard a word that was spoken to him from the boy's mouth.

Newt shook his head and blinked a few times, scrunching up his nose. "Sorry, Tommy. I was just... distracted."

Thomas frowned again, raising his eyebrows as they continued to walk and Newt quickly glanced back at Teresa—approaching ever the more faster. Bringing his gaze back to the brunet, he noticed Thomas was now staring ahead, eyes wide and then wincing as he slowed his steps.

"Shit." He mumbled, closing a hand around the top of Newt's arm. The blond glanced down at it, then back up at his friend, a whirlpool of thoughts consuming his mind. What had happened to doting-over-Teresa Thomas?

It was like someone then hit play on the scenario, as suddenly Teresa spotted them, an almost disgusted expression forming as she came face to face with the two of them. They stopped in their tracks. Newt froze as Teresa's ice-cold blue eyes scowled at him, and he hoped this wasn't because he had ended the events at Thomas' dad's work apartment. Her stare remained on him for what felt like hours, burning holes of her hatred into him.

"You know," she started, words etched with as much bitterness as her glare. "I think it's revolting and despicable that you still have this act going on Tom." Newt felt himself let out a small breath as Teresa turned to square up to Thomas, feeling slightly dizzy at this encounter. Harriet and Sonya nodded from over her shoulder and repeated the words 'revolting' and 'despicable' in sneers. "The fact you still have the whole school convinced of your homoerotic tendencies, when we know it was all just a big popularity act."

Newt swallowed. She knew that they had been faking their relationship to win homecoming and climb the social hierarchy? Heart pounding, he willed himself to say something, but all he could do was turn to the boy at his side, head hung low as if he were ashamed to look at the girl he was preciously so infatuated with as she spoke the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but.

"Using a fake relationship to become popular," Teresa laughed, the sound hollow and sounded more maniacal than one following a joke. "I have to say, that's a good one. But in poor taste, don't you think? Did you ever stop to wonder what other gay kids would think when you supposedly "came out" to the world? Did you ever think that maybe they would look up to you, follow your lead as the first same sex couple in Denver? Did you ever," she raised a perfectly manicured finger at Thomas, pointing it threateningly in his face as Newt stood in shock, "think that maybe - when the truth came out, because it _will_ come out - there would be repercussions? That this façade you've been playing out isn't okay? Did you ever think, _Tom_?!" Her voice raised volume until she was practically spitting in the brunet's face out of anger.

His arm began to swell with numbness, and as Newt dared to look down, he noticed that Thomas was squeezing him within an inch of his life; he almost reached out to put his hand on top of the brunet's, but found himself still once more. How did she know about this? What had Thomas told her? _When_ had he told her? These questions added to the dizziness he was already feeling, until he realised that Teresa was no longer shouting in Thomas' face, but once again glaring at him instead.

"You're no better, Newt. I'd even say you're worse. You let him drag you into this mess and you didn't once try to stop it. I have to hand it to you though - your acting is fantastic, _really!_ The way you looked at him all those times on stage and in the bedroom, you had me thoroughly convinced you were in love with him! I hope you're both happy with yourselves and live happily ever after, two deceiving children at the bottom of the social ladder forever."

"You're wrong."

Newt turned to see Thomas looking back up at her, a spark of something in his eyes.

"Am I now? Because I'm pretty sure I understand perfectly. Soon, so will the whole school, then the whole of Denver."

And just like that she was gone, pushing past them in disgust at their actions, followed quickly by her two minions as they scurried past, noses turned up. They were alone. All Newt could hear was the fast beating of his heart and the squeezing of his arm suddenly stopped, leaving the area tingling as it began to regain feeling. Once the clattering of heels against the floor had vanished, the blond felt like he could breathe normally once more, the oppressive force against his chest removed, leaving him free. But before he had time to make a sound, Thomas was already walking off towards the ICT room once again.

Newt soon joined him, wanting more than anything to ask the numerable questions that ran through his head, but not doing so at the blank expression on Thomas' face. He looked like he was holding something back, not able to say whatever was on his mind out loud. The blond wished he could help, but he didn't know how. The brunet walked, clenching and relaxing his fists as he walked faster, as if he were fighting something inside.

Instead, the pair quickly reached the room the yearbook team were gathered in and were welcomed. Smiles spread across the boys' faces, hiding their true feelings as if the incident a second ago hadn't just effected them. They took seats next to each other around the table, Zart - as yearbook head Editor in Chief - standing at the far end, issuing out any final tasks before congratulating everyone on a job well done. Their yearbook was the ‘best one yet’ and would be set to be mass-produced in the next few days. Most of the team left after that (including Brenda who had been the first person to complete her job of page design), leaving Newt, Thomas, Zart and two other people to work on a few bits and pieces here and there.

An hour passed and the two other volunteers left to go home, Thomas and Newt huddled around one computer inputting the last few quotes under people's names. The blond looked over his shoulder as Zart gathered up his own stuff to leave, flicking through a few already printed pages with a smile on his face. He bid the two of them goodnight, telling them not to stay much later before he, too, exited and waved through the glass pane on the door. Once more they were alone, left to their own devices.

"'Flourine uranium carbon potassium bismuth technetium helium sulfur germanium thulium oxygen neon yttrium'? That's someone's yearbook quote? Elements on the periodic table?" Thomas raised an eyebrow as he loaded up Alby Stein's submission. Newt chuckled, shaking his head to point at the screen.

"It's overused. You see, the elements in their shorthand form spell out 'Fuck bitches, get money'. He thinks he's funny."

"Well, it made you laugh."

Newt looked over at Thomas, a smile painted across his face, eyes crinkling at the corners. The blond sat back slowly, a small grin forming on his own face. He cleared his throat and nodded. "I guess it did. Despite it being a repetitive, kind of rude, hidden statement that no idiot in this school will figure out."

"Hey, I take personal offence to that!"

They added the last few late submissions (a few quotes here and there about the future, one from Martin Luther King Jr. and even one about Spongebob, but Newt decided not to dwell on the humour of some of his year and pasted it in) before saving and sending the remaining pages to the printer at the end of the room. Newt stood, walking over to the sound of the printer-photocopier whirring to life, chugging out their final product that Zart would check over and mass print in the morning. He tapped his fingers on the white plastic top of the machine, the final twenty A3 pages printing out on the glossy sheets in full colour. As he waited for the machine to cease, the blond bit the inside of his cheek as he thought about the scene with Teresa, everything she had said and how Thomas had told her she was wrong. Wrong about what? _Why and how had she known?_

As Newt collected the pages in his hand, he heard Thomas' footsteps approaching from behind and he thought about it being the perfect moment to ask about what had happened. Beginning to turn, Newt whipped his head around last and opened his mouth to speak, only to have his words muffled and cut off.

"Tommy, what—"

Newt's eyes flew open for a second and his pulse quickened as he tried to come to terms with what was happening. His mouth was warm and a strong pressure was pushing against his lips in equal warmth, making his head spin and legs feel as if they were melting. He had to grip the edge of the printer firmly with one hand to steady himself as he toppled slightly backwards against it, eyelids fluttering shut, head tilting to the side. As his free hand moved up to grasp at the fabric of the form, the situation consumed him and he couldn't believe it.

Thomas was kissing him.

 

* * *

 

 

Minho thought things couldn't have been going better with Newt as he two-finger saluted at his basketball teammates, bidding them farewell to make his way over to the ICT Suite. Not, of course, without showering and changing first - but it was okay, because Newt had told him that he reckoned they would finish up the yearbook around quarter-to-six, which gave him fifteen minutes to get over there and surprise him.

Aside from all the sporting activities he was involved in or captain of, Newt was the one constant in his life that kept him excited and his blood pumping. He was charming, smart, witty, honest and his _smile_ , Minho thought, grinning to himself as he walked (newly showered and changed, school bag slung over his shoulder) from the sports block to the main building, _don't get me started on that smile_. He could've written dozens of poems, painted hundreds of pictures and tried to find a star in the sky that were as beautiful as it, without succeeding. Nothing quite compared. Newt was his own galaxy and Minho was honoured to be a small particle living in all it's vast glory, let alone be as big a part of his life as he was.

Unknowingly, Minho struck up a tune, humming as he strode through the empty halls with a bounce in his step. He planned to surprise his boyfriend and whisk him out to dinner that Wednesday evening, someplace that most people in the city overlooked, but Minho knew was extraordinarily beautiful - just like the blond, he thought.

God, he was in _love_.

It was a remarkable thing, especially since it happened none too often for the jock. He'd had his fair share of heartbreak when he was young, naïve and in middle school, but had realised later on that he'd never been serious. Sure, he got around, slept with whoever, whatever and whenever (team pansexual for the win), but he hadn’t been _in love_ all those times. Not until high school, and even then the number of people he had fallen in love with now only stood at two, and being in love with Newt Isaacs was so much better than being in love with any one else (screw you Ximena Fitzpatrick and your stupid new arts school up state!).

Colleges had offered him sports scholarships all over the country, and if he was lucky, he was going to accept the best one nearest to Newt so he was only a drive away. His future happiness was pretty much set, a smile permanently plastered on his face since the day Newt came to apologise to him. He wasn't expecting as forward an apology as he had gotten, but it made his heart swell and whole body feel fuzzy to hear the sorry in person.

He drummed on the lockers with his fingers as he walked down the halls, swinging his muscly arms back and forth to the song he was humming (it sounded like a mix of songs rather than any singular song in particular, but it worked all the same with his ecstatic mood). Minho picked up his pace, checking the time on his watch as the lockers rattled; six minutes until the supposed end time Newt had told him. He was right on schedule to arrive outside and meet the blond there. Just one more corner to turn.

Slowing down his steps, Minho entered the computer lab corridor and ran a hand through his hair - sporting his usual signature hairstyle. Newt had slept round once he’d apologised (only slept, much to the jock's disappointment), and in his groggy, still half-asleep morning state had ran his fingers through Minho's hair, telling him to wear it down sometime because he liked it flat and fluffy as it was. Since then he had worn his hair down a few times to school when he wasn't doing sports that day, earning him a few quizzical, surprised looks from the student population, alongside teasing remarks from his friends saying he looked about ten years younger that way. Minho didn't care; he saw the small smile tugging at the corners of Newt's mouth whenever they spotted each other on those days. A little bit of teasing could be tolerated to see Newt's smile like that, knowing he'd been the cause of it.

But, as Minho came to a stop outside the ICT suite, the smile gradually fell from his face. He halted and then stepped back an inch, peering forward through the glass pane in the door at the sight inside. As the jock bit his lip, the memory of the night of the apology ran through his mind.

_"It's just that I feel as if Thomas is still your boyfriend, and I'm just this stand in." Minho had said calmly, eyes sad as he stood in the doorway and gazed at the blond boy in front of him._

_Newt had shaken his head, swallowing before he said his words. "No, no. I just forgot... I promise. I'm trying to let him go, I really am. I'm almost there. Just, trust me. Give me time."_

Minho caught sight of the view before him once more, Thomas and Newt locked in an embrace, lips pressed against each other forcefully as Newt was backed against the printer, not putting up a fight. Moving to lean back against the wall outside the room, he stared down at his gym shoes and ran a hand over his face.

I'm trying to let him go... I'm almost there... Trust me... Give me time.

What had he been thinking? He didn't stand a chance against Thomas.

 

* * *

 

 

It wasn't a dream, Newt knew that as he pinched his arm, lips still moving against Thomas' slowly, hand clenching the back of the boy's shirt so tightly so he wouldn't disappear. A delayed sense of euphoria then swept through his entire body, heart pounding so hard against his chest he was sure that Thomas would feel it. His mind was a mess, but he leant in further to the brunet, opening his mouth marginally out of routine to fall deeper into his embrace with his soulmate.

Newt felt his eyes watering slightly in the moment, screwing them shut even tighter to stop the tears coming and to focus on the feel of Thomas against him, pulling him deeper. The brunet's hand was cold against his face as it held his jaw, perfectly cupping it as he steered the blond to turn his head slightly.

Without realising it, Newt had slipped his tongue forward, breathing out a harsh, fast breath through his nose as it came into contact with Thomas' in his mouth. He didn't need air, he thought as they began to kiss faster with tongues darting in and out of one another's mouths together; Thomas' kiss was all the oxygen he needed.

Fireworks flared behind his eyes, tiny dots of colour dancing in the darkness and he curled his fingers into the shaggy brown locks at the back of Thomas' head. The slight pain in his back at the printer pushing into him was forgotten, and he instinctively, subconsciously moved his leg between brunet's, furthering his arousal.

His jeans were tightening and as he pulled back to gasp at some air, a millisecond later they were engaged in their kiss once more, this one fiercer than the last. Their teeth clattered a little until they found a rhythm, pulling each other closer as if they were gripping onto each other for support in a storming sea. Newt would've been happy to drown in Thomas' touch there and then: the taste of his lips, the careful touch of his skin, the heat in his cheeks.

Nothing he seemed to do could pull him close enough to Thomas without stepping into _that_ territory. The feel of his hair in his hands as he ran his fingers through it, tugged at it with fists of his just-too-long locks, was glorious. It sent his blood pumping so furiously he could hear it loud like a drum in his ear. He felt as if his lips and tongue moved to the rhythm of it, soaking up and capturing as much of Thomas as he could. Soon, Thomas’ tongue joined in the forceful rhythm and he made a small groan when his hair was pulled that made Newt feel almost faint with his dizziness.

Before either one of them got to the point where they wouldn't be able to stop themselves ripping their clothes off, they pulled apart slowly, mouths pressing together softly once more until they were separated. Newt kept his eyes closed and his fingers that were tangled in Thomas' hair let go of his locks, travelling delicately down the back of the boy's shirt. Breathing deeply, Newt could hear the brunet's breaths fall into motion with his. Entire body shivering in a welcomed glee, the blond gradually opened his eyes until he was staring into Thomas' enchanting, chocolate irises.

Newt tried to hide his blush and the disbelieving smile that was pulling at his mouth as he looked at Thomas, but the other boy's flushed face and wide, blinking eyes prevented him from doing so. That had really just happened; it wasn't another of his fantasies, an inappropriate daydream he imagined up based on their situation, no. Thomas had really been the one to come up to him and kiss him. Not just any kiss, but what Newt would have called the best damn kiss of his life. He wanted to cry, he had been so overwhelmed with joy.

“W-what was that for?” Newt managed to breathe out, faces so close together their noses were almost brushing in an eskimo-kiss type fashion. He wanted to close his eyes and press his forehead against the brunet’s as he caught his breath, drinking in the atmosphere around them.

Watching as Thomas shuffled his feet and ran a hand over the back of his neck, Newt forgot his question and realised that in the heat of the moment he had dropped the printed pages of the yearbook all over the floor. He quickly bent over to pick them up, soon followed by Thomas so the job was done twice as quickly. The blond picked up his pile and gazed at his best friend, heart still pounding, wandering what to say. Words failed him. They both returned to standing positions, placing the copies on the table alongside all the other finished products of the yearbook, standing back to admire the great job they did.

"Looks g—"

"Well t—"

The pair started at the same time, stopping to look at each other, smiles plastered across both boys' faces. Newt chuckled at how corny this whole moment was and shook his head. "You go. What I was going to say wasn't important."

Thomas nodded, cleared his throat and licked his lips to try and hide his smile. "I was just going to say that this was good fun."

"Which part do you mean?" Newt queried, raising an eyebrow in a way that he hadn't realised was suggestive until he'd already done it.

Chuckling, the brunet looked down at the floor and then back up at the blond, shrugging. "Putting the yearbook quotes under the names, of course."

Newt could see a glimmer behind his eye, all the unanswered questions he had previously wanted to ask about Teresa vanishing entirely as Thomas stepped forward again and their lips met in a slow, soft kiss. A hand curled around the back of the blond's neck and the touch sent tingles throughout his body; everything was as still as a statue except for his moving lips. The cold skin of Thomas’ thumb made his stomach tighten as it caressed the side of his jaw softly. It was a sweet, sweet bliss.

Then it was over in a flash, the two realising the time as they pulled apart, rushing around to gather up their bags and belongings. Newt wanted to know _why_ more than anything, but past experience of asking that question had only ever ended in Thomas disappearing to "figure things out". Whatever he had decided this time, he did not want to have him do his man of mystery vanishing act now. He glanced at Thomas as he stuffed his pencil case into his bag, wishing he knew what was going on in that beautiful mind of his.

Once they were all packed up, the two logged off their machine, making sure to save their work once again before making their way towards the exit. As if nothing had just happened, Thomas sparked up a conversation about the yearbook and how pleased he was with it - Newt just smiled and nodded along as they pushed open the door. This was how it was meant to be: he wanted to be able to kiss the boy he was in love with as if there were no tomorrow, and then return to talking about everyday things in life, no cause for worrying.

As Thomas held open the door for him, Newt stepped out, blush still prominent on his face; he did not expect to receive one of the biggest shocks of his life.

It all happened when things couldn't have been going better with Minho. The man himself appearing with a smile on his face, eyes slightly strained as he greeted them both. Newt's smile lowered slightly, trying to keep it up despite the sudden sick feeling in his stomach. No. No, what had he _done?_

"Minho?" Thomas, still grinning, questioned and greeted his friend. "What are you doing here?"

The jock chuckled and shrugged using his hands. "Practice finished and I was just passing through the halls, when I thought I would come and check on how you guys were doing with the yearbook - Newt told me in class you were almost done."

"Yeah, we just finished."

"Planning to celebrate?" Minho asked, Newt swallowing and tearing his gaze from the boy's as their eyes met. He felt completely dreadful; he was the worst person to walk the Earth.

Thomas took a long breath and laughed himself, shaking his head. "Nah, man. Believe it or not, editing tires you out - I'm too worn out to celebrate. I don't know about Newt though."

Both pairs of eyes parked on him, so Newt found just a smidgen of courage to look up and sigh, "Yeah, no celebrations for me." Oh, how he prayed his _boyfriend_ hadn't looked into the room a minute before to see their 'celebration'.

"All right, well, I guess I'll be seeing you." The jock nodded at them both, flashing a toothy grin alongside a two-finger salute before he jogged off down the halls. As he reached the corner, Newt spotted him look back over his shoulder at them and then disappeared.

He felt wretched, like the most despicable human. Why was he still so hopelessly in love with the boy with the doe eyes, when he could be in love with Minho, sweet, caring, funny... not _Thomas_ , Minho. Staring up at the brunet, it was almost as if the guilt disappeared, which was worse.

"You need a ride home?" Thomas asked, holding the strap of his bag casually, and where he would've usually jumped at the chance to spend more time with the brunet, Newt shook his head with a grateful smile.

"I already bought a return bus fare, it would be stupid not to use it."

"All right," Thomas replied, nodding his head as he rocked from the balls of his feet to his heels. "Just text me when you get home safe, yeah?"

"What are you, my mother?"

A small smile and laugh escaped the boy's mouth, making Newt's heart thump once, very hard against his chest. "I should hope not."

The two walked out of the school together as Thomas talked at Newt about life, the blond getting the sense he was avoiding what had just happened between them. He tried to figure out the boy, putting on a smiling face as he nodded and listened to what he was saying, all the while still forming questions in his mind. Did Thomas not realise the effect he still had on him? If he didn't before, he must've once he kissed the brunet back with everything he had.

Newt watched as Thomas walked slowly to his car, turning so he strode backwards, hands in pockets with a small smile on his face. Newt waved slowly as he stood still, the boy running a hand along his jaw, moles visible as his skin moved at the action, and then he waved back before sliding into his vehicle.

The sight of the car pulling away made his stomach drop, much like the temperature at that point. Newt found himself wrapping his arms around his chest for warmth, shivering as Thomas glanced at him one time through the window, dipped his head and drove off back home. From what he could make out through the glass, there was something he didn’t quite know how to read in the boy’s eyes. He hadn’t been able to tell what the boy was thinking for quite a while now, and now he thought he was more clueless than ever with what had gone on between them.

He didn't know how he found himself running home, but the icy air whipping at his cheeks and eyes, making them stream with water, was enough to wake him up. He hadn't run much since his accident where he hurt his leg, but now it was as if nothing could stop him sprinting. The whistle of the wind drowned out the noise of the world around him, his headache worsening and pounding as his bottled up emotions threatened to break free.

Bursting into the house, he was lucky the sound of the television drowned out his entrance and running up the stairs, wanting more than anything to talk to one specific person. Newt threw himself on his bed, yanking his phone out of his pocket before he stared at the screen of his phone for what felt like an hour, until finally he brought up the contact details.

What the bloody hell was going on?

 

* * *

 

 

**[6:21pm Call Outgoing]**

"Dad?"

"Hey, bud. Long time no speak, I was starting to forget your voice. It's much deeper now that you're a man... How long's it been since you last called?

"About six years..."

"Wow. My boy... Seventeen years old. Time flies, huh? What's up? What made you decide to call your old man after all this time?"

"I'm just checking up. How are you? How's England?"

"...England's good. Cold, cloudy - that hasn't changed in the slightest. As for me? I'm doing well, Nathan. I'm getting myself help, just like I always said I would."

"Really?"

"Yeah. It's been hard, but I don't drink anymore. I think I'm starting to finally become that guy your mother and you always wanted me to be. Speaking of which, how is your mum? Is she well?"

"That's great, dad. She's great..."

"She, uh, she got married didn't she?"

"Yeah, about two and a bit months ago."

"The guy, he's nice? He makes her happy?"

"Steve's wonderful. He's perfect for her, she loves him and she's the happiest I've seen her since... well, in a long time."

"And Steve, he's a good guardian? He takes care of you?"

"Yeah. He has a daughter of his own too: Brenda. She lives with us."

"A daughter... You always wanted a sister."

"I did."

"She nice?"

"We didn't get on at first, but she's great. Everything's just great..."

"Great. You and your mum, you deserve to be happy, you know."

"It's been hard, but we're getting there. What about you, dad? You found anyone new after mum?"

"Me? No... No, your mum she was... despite everything, she was the only one for me. Getting help for myself, not touching the booze helped me see everything I lost. She was the best thing to happen to me alongside you, I just wish I had seen it sooner and been the best thing to happen to the two of you back, rather than the worst... What about you, bud?"

"Huh?"

"You got anyone in your life? Seeing a girl at school?"

"I... Dad. I have something to tell you. It's actually the reason I... The reason I called."

"Yeah?"

"I-I don't... I don't like girls, dad. Not in a romantic way."

"Oh. You're gay?"

"Yeah... I'm gay."

"That's it?"

"What do you mean 'that's it'?"

"Well, that's hardly a crisis like your voice suggested."

"You don't mind?"

"Of course not, why would I?"

"I-It's just mum... she had a hard time... coming to terms with it all. She said it was a 'phase' and I just presumed you'd..."

"Give her a while, she'll come around. She loves you, we both do. Did you think I'd yell at you for being yourself? Nathan, I don't care whether you like boys, girls or dinosaurs - all right, maybe not dinosaurs - I still love you all the same. Now, is there a special guy in your life or one you've got your eye on?"

"I..."

"Nathan? Are you crying? Hey, bud, what's wrong? Did I say something?"

"N-no... It's just... You know Thomas?"

"Tommy? The boy you told me was your best friend the last time we spoke? Yeah, I remember him. You wouldn't shut up about the guy, ha ha. What happened? He react a certain way when you told him you didn't like girls?"

"No, no... It's just, dad, I'm in love with him and I told him—more like yelled it at him in an emotional  outpour, and he said he didn't feel the same..."

"Oh, bud..."

"But, dad. I started seeing this other guy, Minho and he's funny and kind and smart and sporty, and he's the guy that every girl and even straight guys at school want to get with. I really like him."

"Why do I feel like another 'but' is coming on?"

"But, then Tommy kissed me... really, really kissed me and I don't know what to do..."

"Nathan?"

"Y-Yeah, dad?"

"You love this Minho guy?"

"I... don't know."

"And Thomas, he likes you now?"

"I don't know..."

"But you like him back?"

"I don't want to just be best friends with him, dad."

"Then maybe you need to let Minho down carefully and talk to Thomas about everything."

"I don't know if I can..."

"Nathan, listen to me. You listening?"

"Yeah, dad, I'm listening."

"Don't cry—you're an Isaacs. Now, we've known our fair share of heartache, but we're strong and smart and you, you're the best of all of us. You'll figure it out."

"But what if I can't?"

"You will. And if neither Minho or Thomas make the final cut, screw 'em."

"...Thanks, dad."

"I mean it, bud. I love you, you deserve to be happy."

"You too, dad... I wish you hadn't've fucked up."

"Me neither. But, if I hadn't then you never would've gone to America."

"Exactly..."

"Hey, don't say that - you have an amazing life out there, Nathan. Don't forget all the good it's done you. I gotta go now, I've got a meeting at work."

"You got a new job?"

"Yeah, like I said, I'm becoming the best me—the one your mother always wanted."

"I'm really happy for you. I love you..."

"Call me soon, yeah? I need to hear about the lost years of your life. Don't leave me waiting for six years again. I can't survive that long without my little boy."

"I won't, I promise."

"Love you, Newt."

"Love you too, dad."

**[6:32pm Call Ended, 11 minutes, 24 seconds. Edward Isaacs]**

 

* * *

 

 

"Newt?" The blond looked up from the contact screen open on his phone in his lap, eyes meeting the small, thin frame of his mother in the door. Her blonde hair was pulled up out of her face, but her blue eyes were worried as she stood in the doorway, one hand on the framing.

Rubbing his eyes, he sniffled and heard Anne approaching him slowly to sit beside him on his bed. The mattress lowered as she took her seat and Newt stayed still, returning his gaze to his dad's phone number and photo on his bright screen.

"Newt, did you..." Anne started softly, looking over his shoulder at his cell phone, wary of touching him. "Did you just have one of those pretend phone calls with your father that you used to do as a child when you were sad?"

The blond let his phone fall to the carpeted floor and fell into his mother's chest, tears streaming from his eyes at an incredible rate. Sobbing uncontrollably, Newt felt his mother curl her arms around him tightly in a soothing embrace, one hand combing the blond's hair as she closed her eyes and kissed the top of his head. They rocked slightly, fists curling into the fabric of her dress as Newt tried to catch his breath but failed, his emotions pouring out of him like a tsunami. He could hear her trying to calm him down, hushing him gently, saying whatever was troubling him would be okay, but it didn't help.

The two of them sat there for near half an hour before Newt fell asleep on her lap, face red and blotchy from crying, bags under his eyes puffing from the tears. But he was peaceful as he napped and Anne sat stroking the hair of her only child for a while longer, until she carefully lay him down on the bedding to sleep soundly.

Four hours later Newt woke up to the sound of Anne and Steve muttering as they began to get ready for bed. He drowsily sat up, rubbing his still-wet eyes as he yawned and tried to listen in when he caught the mention of his name.

"...and I'm worried about him." His mother stated as Newt shuffled around on his bed, trying to make as little noise as possible.

"These phone calls he used to have with his dad—"

"Pretend phone calls."

"Right, _pretend_ phone calls - you said he hasn't done one in how many years?"

It went quiet for a sudden and Newt swallowed, raking a hand through his messy hair before his mother spoke once again.

"Not since he was eleven and he injured his leg. He 'phoned' his dad crying and asked him how to get better. Except the dad he calls isn't anything like his real father - he's what Newt believes he's like: recovering and changing from who he was into the ideal parent. He was so young and I thought he'd grown out of it, Steve. Seeing him like that again today, my heart broke and I'm so worried for him... I don't know what to do." Clenching his fists around the duvet, the blond took a deep breath before pulling the covers around him until he was all wrapped up. "I'm a terrible mother."

"No. Don't say that—you're not a terrible mom; you're a great one. He knows you care, just give him time. Talk to him tomorrow when he's awake and work through it together - the most important thing is that Newt knows he's not alone, that he has either you or I to lean on."

Newt pulled the pillow down over his head, drowning out the rest of the conversation, though he was pretty sure it died down to low murmurs after that. He hadn't realised how much his emotions effected his mother, made her worry to the extent she was - the fact she still cared just as much now as she did back when his leg was in a shoddy cast aged eleven. Sniffing, Newt smiled weakly; he loved his mother, despite all the nonsense between them in recent months, he loved her so much.

Deciding that he still needed to rest, Newt settled down into his mattress in his duvet wrapped tightly around him, eyes fluttering shut. There was so much he wanted to tell Anne and his family; he needed their help and advice in his current love predicament and he hated feeling so clueless. Most of all he wished that the dad he always dreamed of wasn't make-believe and a figment of his imagination whenever his life went to shambles.

His mind drifted to earlier that day in the ICT suite and he pressed his lips together tightly when he swore he could still feel Thomas’ mouth on his own. The heat the suddenly consumed his body made him flush, and he crossed his legs in his duvet wrap to try and take his mind off what the lower half of his body was doing. Newt didn’t understand, but the more he remembered their kiss, Thomas’ lips on his, hands cupping his face, the closeness of their bodies, the more he found himself not caring about why—when really that was all he wanted to know. Despite himself, Newt even imagined what it would have been like if they hadn’t stopped then and there, if the brunet had started mouthing at his neck at his weak spot under his ear, teeth grazing skin there in a way that made the blond’s knees go weak. He wanted him so badly…

Curling up tighter as he lay there, he imagined what his life would've been like if he had never moved to America, never met Thomas, and he realised that no matter how much life sucked at that moment in time, it would suck even more without his Tommy.

 

* * *

 

 

Minho had driven home from school once he had departed the scene, gripping the steering wheel tightly enough to turn his knuckles white. His mind was foggy and he had to try really hard to pay extra attention to the road ahead of him as he drove and parked up outside his house. Everything was a mess, he thought, as he fumbled with the key to the lock on his front door – usually he would be able to slide it in and unlock the entrance on first try, but today he found it hard to hold the metal shape, let along fit it in without scraping the side of the lock multiple times.

By the time he had finally entered his familiar surroundings of his home, Minho chucked his bag and shoes aside and padded to the kitchen to retrieve a can of beer from the fridge. It was one of his father’s ‘do not touch unless it’s an emergency’ beers, that the man would often drink after a stressful day at work, and then turn on some television programme to shout at and unwind to. If his current state didn’t scream emergency – Minho opened the beer and took a long swig – he didn’t know what did.

After downing the can on the sofa, Minho got up to change into his running gear, tying his shoelaces into triple knots before heading out to clear his head. Running always made him feel better, the exhilaration of the chase making him feel at home in his element. Today, however, as he began to sprint his usual route through the field and down the roads near his house, Minho found himself gritting his teeth, not enjoying the sport as he usually did. Still, he sweated, he pushed himself, he ran further than he usually did and looped back home, all without taking a break. His muscles ached, signalling to him the need of a long soak in a hot bath.

As Minho approached his house, wiping his forehead with the sweatband on his wrist, he planned to walk to the place he held the spare key in, but was halted in his tracks. There was a figure on his porch, cupping his eyes to look through the pane of glass on his door. His hands instinctively curled into fists and his walking became light, as if he were tiptoeing. If it was someone that planned to burgle him, they had better be ready to put up a fight because they would _not_ be getting away with his belongings if he had anything to do with it.

The figure knocked at the door a few times, which made the jock drop his fists slightly, then fully as he saw the man slump slightly and turn around. The expression on his face was weary and confused, also tinged with sadness that would have made his stomach coil in guilt if he hadn’t seen who it was.

“Thomas?” Minho frowned, feeling self-conscious for the first time ever since he was a tubby kid in middle school, before he took up sports. He knew he had nothing to be self-conscious about, but standing next to Thomas, knowing that he was what Newt adored within the inch of his life, he couldn’t help but feel small in comparison. “Can I, uh, can I help you?

Thomas’ face lit up as soon as he saw the person he was looking for, walking down the porch steps slightly before following Minho back up to his door. “I need to talk to you about something really important.” Minho felt the brunet watching him over his shoulder as he reached down into the drainpipe, loosening the bottom so the spare key fell into the palm of his hand. “I thought you weren’t in.”

He swallowed, biting his tongue before standing to face his friend once again. Without saying more than that, by the look in his warm, brown eyes, Minho knew exactly what the boy was going to ask about. Thomas presumed he was completely oblivious – he wished that were the case.

Putting on a smile as he tugged at the shirt stuck to his chest, Minho nodded and slid the key into the lock (first try). “Sure, man. Come on in.”

The pair entered the house, the mostly-wooden interior the first thing that could be seen wherever you looked. Thomas had been here before on several occasions, but the look on his face was still one that showed he was impressed. An unwitting smirk betrayed him and escaped onto his face before he had time to stop it.

Minho led Thomas to the lounge and told him to sit, offering him a drink of beer in which the brunet agreed to. Once the drinks were set on the side, the jock asked Thomas to excuse him for a few minutes whilst he showered and changed into something else. It took him less than three minutes to wash, dry, change into a comfy pair of tracksuit bottoms and a baggy t-shirt before returning to the lounge where the brunet sat, tapping the side of his unopened can.

“So,” Minho fell back onto the comforter beside the couch Thomas was perched on. “What’s up?”

The crack and hiss of the can being opened let Minho to watch as Thomas brought the metal to his lips and took three huge gulps of the substance inside. Creases appeared around his eyes as Thomas screwed them up slightly, probably at the strong taste. Minho raised an eyebrow at him as the boy lowered the can, almost downing the whole drink.

“We’re friends, right? Because I really need a friend’s opinion and help with something that’s happening to me.”

“Of course we’re friends, Thomas.” Minho nodded, and he meant it, no matter how much today’s shitty circumstance had hurt him. They were friends. “Tell me. I’m all ears.”

Thomas jiggled his leg up and down nervously, and Minho rubbed his chin as he waited for the boy to speak. “Okay, well… Shit. Okay. What do you do when you like someone you’re not meant to like, but when you kiss him— _or her_ —it feels right and the world does all that cliché time-stop stuff, and you _know_ they like you because they told you months ago in this sudden declaration, but you told them you didn’t like them back then when really, you were confused and now everything is even more confusing and you know you feel the same but you can’t—“

“Woah,” Minho held up his hands and waved them in front of himself to stop the word vomit streaming from Thomas’ mouth. “Dude, slow down.”

Gulping, Thomas nodded and took a few more breaths. It was silent for a while after that as Thomas lowered his head, Minho watching carefully as he saw the boy picking at his nails. It was a distinctly Newt thing to do, he found himself thinking, chewing on his lip. Eventually Thomas’ eyes met his once again and what came out of his mouth took him by surprise.

“Minho… I think I’m in love with Newt.”

Minho swallowed as the brunet’s eyes bore into him, desperation present in them. Silence crawled back once more for a minute until the jock composed himself and moved so he was sat beside his friend on the couch. Slowly, he placed a careful hand on Thomas’ back, and then patted him with a strained grin on his face.

“That’s so great, man…”

“You don’t get it – I told him I didn’t feel the same and he was devastated… but the truth is, I was just shocked and we kissed today and I do, Minho. I do feel the same.”

A deep feeling in his mind made Minho really want to tell Thomas to back off, tell him that Newt was his… but he knew he never really had the blond in the first place. The side that cared about him so much overruled and pushed back the dark thoughts. Everything was so confusing to him right now, all he could say (no matter how much it pained him) was, “what are you going to do then?”

Shrugging, Thomas let out a long sigh. “That’s why I came to you. I figured as a friend and someone like… well, like you, that you could help me.”

“Like me?”

“As in with all your experience…”

Oh, Minho thought, his mouth forming the shape of his words. He nodded, heart aching, yet he knew that if he were Thomas he would be doing the exact same thing. “I’ll try to help the best I can. Tell me…” He winced and composed himself before asking. “Tell me everything from the start.”

Thomas unleashed his story, explaining everything from the threesome, to a story and event involving Teresa he was certain Newt had never heard (but that was for another time), then the wedding and finally the yearbook club. He felt his heart getting heavier with every word.

“So you only joined the yearbook club to spend more time with Newt? Even if you see him every day anyway?” Thomas nodded at Minho’s deduction, adding that it was how he knew how he felt about the blond. Minho sighed – he should’ve seen it coming; maybe if he did then Thomas wouldn’t have fallen for Newt. Rubbing his neck, the Asian bit his lip as he thought to himself of a solution to their predicament. He only had Newt’s happiness on his mind…

“What do you think I should do?” Thomas queried sadly, and Minho—closing his eyes to take another deep breath, the umpteenth of the night—spoke quietly and full of hidden sorrow.

“You should ask him out. Go for it, don’t let… don’t let anything hold you back.”

It was as if he were raising a white flag, ready to surrender. It hurt him more than he cared to admit, but now that Thomas finally felt the same, it was only a matter of time before he would be out of the picture completely. Here, at least he had the chance to get onto the lifeboat before the Titanic sunk.

Making eye contact with the brunet once again, he saw Thomas taking in his words and took a deep breath. “Okay. I’m going to tell him. I’m going to explain everything and tell him. I don’t want him to hate me… I can’t have him hate me.”

“He could never hate you, Thomas.”

The pair finished up their drinks and shortly after, Thomas departed with a thousand ‘thank yous’ on his lips. Once he had left, Minho sat on the sofa for a while longer and then went to his room across from the lounge to get ready for bed. But before he did, he swiped up his phone and dialled a number. The phone felt heavy in his hand as he held it to his ear, eyes squeezed shut.

 

* * *

 

 

Newt heard his phone buzz on his floor just as he was beginning to slip into a light sleep. He started up, still tightly wrapped in his blankets, though he managed to yank an arm free to sweep up his cell. He swallowed heavily when he saw Minho’s caller ID, the guilt rising in his stomach like vomit as he pressed answer.

“Hello?”

“Hey, Newt.” Minho’s voice sounded tired and Newt screwed up his eyes, pressing his index finger and thumb to the corners of them.

“Hey, Min. You all right?”

The boy chuckled and Newt chewed on his lip, scratching at the duvet with his short nails. “Yeah. I was just wondering if you wanted dinner on Friday rather than Saturday. If that’s okay?”

He usually had Thomas over on a Friday, but Newt pushed that aside and nodded. “Of course, Friday it is. Where are you taking me?”

“Just a nice little restaurant. Nothing major.”

Newt felt himself smiling weakly, eyes heavy. “Okay. I’m looking forward to it.”

Minho told him some other stuff, how he’d send over the address later and that he couldn’t wait to see him. Newt lay back down on his bed, talking with his boyfriend for a while longer until Minho stopped them, the nausea returning.

“Anyway, it’s late. I’ll leave you to it.” Newt stayed silent as Minho spoke, saying a slow goodbye before the phone call ended.

The cell phone closed the call screen, showing him his father’s caller info. Within the second Newt locked it and chucked it across the room so it tumbled to the floor and he curled into his duvet again. Today had been a disaster – he was so emotionally drained and confused and felt so sick. His feelings were swelling in his mind and it took him almost an hour of lying awake after his final words to Minho before he finally fell asleep, sickness consuming him as the night rolled on.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> well well well how the tables have turned  
> it's been a long twenty two chapters you guys, and finally the story really begins haha  
> a lot of different stuff happens in this chapter from teresa's return (boo hiss), /that scene/, minho witnessing /that scene/, newt's phone call to his dad (sniffle), and thomas' confession to minho.  
> i told you minho was going to have a hard time these next few chapters and this is one of the hardest. he only wants newt to be happy, even if that means sacrificing his own love... my baby boy :-(  
> anyway, it's been nice having two chapters up in two days, though i doubt this will happen again any time soon, especially with the tiny amount of chapters left for you guys... i need to draw out some tension hehehe  
> anyway, i hope you enjoy and know it's only a mess from here on out. prepare yourselves!  
> this is extremely unbeta's as per usual, so feel free to point out mistakes and leave comments!  
> thank you for the constant support - i am overwhelmed every time i post a chapter by the response you guys have and i am so emo. i love you all so much.
> 
> rosie


	23. twenty three

“He’s got a temperature.”

“I’ll ring up the school and let them know he won’t be in today, don’t worry.”

Newt groaned as a cold hand came into contact with his head. As he groggily blinked the sleep out of his eyes, he felt his head pounding with an intense headache and squinted at his mother. She was all dressed in her work clothes, ready to do a report on the local news channel, but her features were strained and worried, lips pursed and she shook her head.

Trying to sit up, Newt was softly held down by Anne, telling him without words to stay in bed. The blond snuggled back down under the covers, sniffling a little before moaning in pain at the throbbing in his skull.

“Can I get you anything, baby?” Anne asked, voice gentle and caring as she took a seat beside her son.

He could vaguely hear Steve talking on the phone downstairs, and even from that far away, any noise made him feel even worse. Newt had never felt so gross and sticky and hot, but he wanted to curl up in his covers forever and cry some more. He knew that would only make him sicker.

“I’d like some ibuprofen, please.” He managed to say, but his voice was hoarse and weak as the words left his lips.

Anne looked wholeheartedly sad but nodded, squeezing the top of his arm over the duvet. “Of course, honey. Get some rest and get better. Don’t worry about school; we’re ringing up to tell them you won’t be in today. I’ll get you some medicine and a glass of water. Then I’ll be downstairs if you need me – just give me a call.”

“N-no, mum. You have to go to work. Don’t worry about me.”

“You may be almost an adult, but you’re my baby and you’re sick. There’s no way I’m leaving you alone today. Work can find someone to cover me.”

Soft lips met his burning forehead and it only made Newt feel worse as he shrank back under the covers further, listening to the pitter-patter of his mother’s footsteps as she left the room to go downstairs. Not only had he made his mum miss work, but he wasn’t going to school, he was stuck with one of the worst choices of his life and he just wanted to burst.

No matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t just sleep the day away; his head burned too much for him to close his eyes for too long. Even once he had taken the two tablets his mother had handed him and swallowed them with water, he still felt awful. Newt knew they wouldn’t kick in straight away, but after two hours of lying, staring at the ceiling, his head feeling as it were on fire, he knew there was nothing he could do to stop it.

Luckily, Newt didn’t feel like throwing up or anything other than just groggy, weary and stuck with the worst headache he’d ever had. Deep inside he knew he’d caused it himself from his wrecked emotional state, but he didn’t see any way he could’ve avoided it. He’d dug himself into a hole he’d never meant to create and he couldn’t see a way out without hurting someone or himself. Everything was awful.

Having nothing better to do than stare at the ceiling and try not to focus too much on his pounding head, Newt sat up slowly and weighed out his options. His kiss with Thomas the previous day had come out of nowhere, and he knew he shouldn’t be but he was still very much infatuated with the boy. Then there was Minho, good, kind, sweet Minho, whom he found himself falling for each and every day. He didn’t understand the brunet’s motivation or reasoning behind his kiss, but he wanted to know more than anything, and he hated Minho not knowing what had happened.

Guilt weighed on him like a ton of bricks piled on his shoulders. Newt knew that if he was well enough to go on the planned date with Minho the next day, he was going to tell him what had happened – the boy deserved to know, and he hoped he understood. He hoped they could figure out a solution to this together. Newt had been so sure that he was finally choosing Minho, why oh why did Thomas go and have to mess everything up again?

Knocked out of his thoughts at lunchtime, Newt was made to eat a broth his mother had cooked up. To make sure he stomached it, Anne sat by and observed him taking small spoonfuls of the hot liquid until he was full and she was satisfied. She refilled his drink, asked how he was feeling and left him to heal once he said (lied) he was getting better. Newt caught her staring at his phone that was on the floor, halfway across the room where he’d thrown it the night prior, and he knew she wanted to ask him about him talking to his ‘dad’, but instead of doing so she just nodded and exited.

Newt did, however, give into the temptation and kicked aside the covers, throwing his feet over the edge to pad across the carpet to his phone. He bent down, swooped the cell up off the floor and turned it over. It was almost dead, but the time read it was twenty-four-past-two in the afternoon and the screen was flooded with messages from both Thomas and Minho. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath before he bought the phone back to his bed and plugged in the charger. It made a ‘ding’ sound and lit up.

Unlocking the device, Newt was sure he had never felt his heart beat as fast as it was, his stomach knotting as he began to feel sick (he was sure he jinxed himself earlier saying he wouldn’t throw up). The message app shone with a bright red notification bubble and his slender finger tapped on it, shaking as it was retracted and the app opened up.

 

**Tommy: ???**

**Minho: Also I’m sorry for the flood of texts x**

 

The two most recent messages burned into Newt’s retinas and he shoved his phone onto his bedside table, hands moving to rub at his face. He pressed against his eyelids with his thumb an index finger, making his headache burn hotter and he could feel the tears forming. Grabbing a pillow to his side, he pressed his face into it and screamed as loudly as he could into it, until he had ran out of air and was taking deep, shattering breaths.

His door flew open and a few seconds later Newt felt a hand on his back, pulling him away from the pillow and into an embrace against their chest. Newt wrapped his arms around his mother’s frame again and tried to slow his breathing so it wasn’t as shaky, and the tears refused to fall anymore. Now his eyes stung, his head hurt and he was exhausted.

It was a repeat of the previous night; Anne comforted Newt until he had stilled, rocking him backwards and forwards slightly as if he were only a small child—Newt didn’t care, it was working and he felt the pressure ease from his chest, as if it were no longer constricted. Eventually he found the strength to sit up and he stared into his mother’s blue eyes, a gorgeous, cool pool of azure that could give the iciest glare or the calmest gaze.

Anne took her son’s hand and Newt stared from their skin on their laps back towards his mother’s eyes. Her other hand moved to stroke the haphazard hair out of his face and caressed his cheek, the faintest of touches that soothed his entire body. As he sat there with her talking away his anger and sadness, Newt finally breathed, closed his eyes and spoke, so faintly it was almost inaudible.

“I’m so sorry, mum.”

“Sorry? Newt… What—What on Earth are you sorry for?”

“Last night, I—“

“Honey, don’t say sorry for that. You were sad, of course I was going to sit with you and hold you.”

Shaking his head, Newt scrunched his eyes up tighter, as if he were afraid that the tears wouldn’t stop if he opened them. “No… that’s not… I’m sorry for not talking to you first, before I spoke to…”

“Oh, _Newt_.” Anne understood what he was saying, holding both sides of his face before she brought him forward and touched her lips to his forehead. “I’m the one who should be sorry. Sorry you didn’t feel like you could come to me about whatever is making you feel this rotten.”

“No, mum…”

“I haven’t been easy to talk to or share things with, and I have a reason why but it doesn’t mean it’s an excuse for the way I’ve treated you as a person, a human, my _son_. The way I’ve been since your father is not the person I ever wanted to be, and ever since I met Steve I feel like that darkness has lifted, and I want to help, if I can, to make this all better for you.”

Newt took another shuddering breath, but it was slower, deeper and filled his lungs with air unlike the others. He nodded and sniffed, looking down at his lap as he struggled to think of a way to explain everything that had gone on between him, Minho and Thomas.

He started from the very beginning, explained why and how he and Thomas had become an item, pinning it down to a stupid assumption and announcement from the most popular boy in school, Minho. He explained their kiss, the way he had began to feel things for Thomas he couldn’t explain, he left out the almost threesome for her own peace of mind, mentioned Teresa, Homecoming, the wedding and how after he had confessed and Thomas had rejected him, he had started dating Minho secretly to get back at the boy and get over him.

“And then he kissed me one we’d finished the yearbook and it felt so amazing, but then I saw Minho waiting for me and… I have never felt so guilty and confused in my life, mum. And I have no bloody clue what to do.”

“You say you have a date with Minho tomorrow?”

Newt sniffled and nodded, forehead creasing as he frowned slightly. “Yes, that is if I feel well enough to go. Both he and Thomas have been texting me about where I’ve been all day, though I haven’t checked them.”

“Then maybe, go to this date and see how it goes. You tell Minho about the yearbook incident and you see how he and you feel. That will get the guilt off your chest as the truth is out there. Relationships are a two-way thing, Newt – if you don’t love him then you have to let him know, you can’t keep him in this state of void if it’s not going anywhere.” Anne ran her thumb along the back of his hand. “You’re smart, but follow your heart, not your head this time. If you still love Thomas, you need to find out why he kissed you and go for it.”

“But what if he says he doesn’t like me again? I don’t think I can handle another heartbreak like that…”

“ _He_ kissed _you_ , didn’t he? That has to count for something. You’re my boy, my gorgeous, beautiful, sweet boy, and he would be a fool for ever letting a jewel as precious as you go.”

Newt felt the corners of his lips turn upwards as his eyes watered. He slowly pulled his hands from his mother’s and wrapped them around her for another embrace, nuzzling his head into her shoulder for comfort. She held him tight like she always did, whether he was a child or a young adult, hands soothingly stroking his back. His heartbeat slowed and he realised he had never loved his mum more than in the moment she said her next words.

“I love you, Newt, whether you fall in love with boys or not, I love you. I’m sorry I struggled for so long to accept it’s something you can’t change. I love you no matter what, you understand?”

“I love you too, mum.”

 

* * *

 

 

Anne had departed after their hug, and Newt went to shower despite it being three in the afternoon. He wanted to clear all the gunk and grime off of his body, and once he had washed and dried he did surprisingly feel better. Sure, his headache was still there, but he felt a if he had nudged it to the back of his mind now, so it only hurt him a lot when he concentrated on the pain.

Once he was in some fresh baggy clothes, Newt sat back on his bed and took his phone in his hand, unlocking it only to have the messages screen pop up bright and clear for everyone to see. He chewed on his bottom lip as he stared at the two bold names; the blue dots next to them telling him the messages were unread. He muttered a choosing song under his breath until his finger landed on Minho’s name and he clicked his messages.

 

**Minho: are you okay?**

**Minho: Am I just blind or are you not at school today?**

**Minho: I thought I saw you, but when I stopped the person it wasn’t you.**

**Minho: Now I’m embarrassed.**

**Minho: You’re definitely not at school cuz youre not in science**

**Minho: Newt? :( Are you okay? Where are you?**

**Minho: I hope you’re okay**

**Minho: feel better**

**Minho: please feel better you deserve to smile**

**Minho: Also I’m sorry for the flood of texts x**

Newt smiled sadly at the screen. Minho never failed to make him feel warm inside and cared for and he wished their situation were different as he read through the texts and tasted the slight tang of blood in his mouth. He grimaced and stopped chewing his lip as his finger touched the new message box.

 

**Newt: hey**

**Newt: sorry I haven’t replied I’m sick**

**Newt: been sleeping most of the day**

**Minho: oh thank god I thought as such but it’s good to have u reply**

**Minho: how are you feeling now?**

 

**Newt: a little better, just a headache**

**Minho: should I reschedule 2morrow for another day?**

**Newt: no, I think I’ll be fine**

**Minho: that’s great**

**Minho: I’ll leave you to sleep and get better yh?**

**Minho: I missed you today**

**Minho: see you tomorrow and text u the details**

**Newt: yeah, see you tomorrow**

**Minho: xx**

**Newt: x**

**Newt: x**

Finally able to breathe, Newt clicked off of the thread and ran a hand through his knotted, messy hair. He noticed after he had sent one kiss to Minho that the other boy had used two, and it was often customary to reply to texts with kisses of the same amount as they had sent. In a quick panic, Newt sent another text of a single kiss and he hoped that the jock wouldn’t be one of those people that got touchy about that nonsense. He didn’t think Minho would be as he clicked onto Thomas’ message thread.

 

**Tommy: newt where r u**

**Tommy: im in math and I swear we always have this class together**

**Tommy: seriously where r u man**

**Tommy: is this about yesterday**

**Tommy: did you make it back safely?**

**Tommy: DID THE BUS DRIVER KIDNAP YOU???**

**Tommy: oh god I hope that last message isn’t true**

**Tommy: I would literally go out of my freaking mind if it were true**

**Tommy: newt please reply**

**Tommy: I need to know ur alright**

**Tommy: I need 2 kno if some crazy bus man**

**Tommy: or lady**

**Tommy: too k you last night**

**Tommy: newt this isn’t a joke WHERE ARE YOU**

**Tommy: if you’re avoiding me I get it but just let me know ur okay**

**Tommy: I have such a guilty concience right now**

**Tommy: newt I need you**

**Tommy: newt**

**Tommy: ???**

**Newt: conscience***

**Newt: you mean you have a guilty conscience. There’s an S in there**

**Newt: and im not avoiding you, tommy.**

**Tommy: What**

**Tommy: oh my god**

**Tommy: oh thank goodness**

**Tommy: don’t scare me like that ever again I was losing it**

**Tommy: where the hell are you?**

**Newt: not kidnapped by a crazy bus driver**

**Tommy: right right**

**Newt: im at home**

**Newt: been sick all day and mum let me take the day off**

**Newt: sorry I didn’t tell you**

**Tommy: it’s ok I thought u were ign**

**Tommy: fuck pressed enter too quick**

**Tommy: I thought you were ignoring me**

**Newt: im not ignoring you**

**Tommy: I can see that now**

**Tommy: listen can we talk?**

**Tommy: like tomorrow after school or something?**

**Newt: sure but not tomorrow im busy tomorrow**

**Tommy: busy?**

**Tommy: Sunday then?**

**Newt: that is the day I tend to always dedicate to you tommy**

**Tommy: right right**

**Tommy: Sunday got it**

**Newt: your house or?**

**Tommy: yeah I’ll get back to u on that**

**Tommy: I really am glad u weren’t kidnapped by a bus driver**

**Newt: shut up tommy**

**Tommy: :)**

**Tommy: get better soon**

**Tommy: eat soup and sleep and get a warm flannel for ur head**

**Tommy: especially sleep**

**Newt: I would if you stopped messaging me**

**Tommy: ouch**

**Tommy: im hurt newt**

**Tommy: but get well soon**

**Tommy: nothing’s right without cha**

Not knowing how he should reply, Newt stared at the screen blankly and placed it back on the side table, locking it so the message would go away. He swallowed harshly and pulled his pillow to his chest before lying back to continue his blank staring at the ceiling. He was secretly relieved he didn’t have to go to school today, giving him the time to calm his body and think things over. His mind was reeling with thoughts and questions, the messages from both boys burning in the back of his eyes.

Thomas wanted to talk, and Newt very much wanted to talk too, to clear up any confusion clouding his actions. He just wanted to know everything inside the brunet’s head – he wanted to know why then of all times he had decided to do what Newt had only dreamed of him doing for so long; he wanted to know what had motivated him, fuelled him to kiss him so intensely…

Thoughts like those kept Newt up for a few more hours, until he started to feel his eyelids drooping and fell asleep, headache still present in his temples. Despite sleep doing wonders for him, when he woke up the next morning, Newt was warned he was not allowed to go to school again that day, as he needed another for recovery. The blond would’ve complained, but he wasn’t going to fight with his mum, and besides, he did still feel worse for ware. His headache had subsided but his eyes felt heavy and he still felt slightly weary, but enough, he determined to let him go out and see Minho that evening.

“On one condition,” Anne warned, waggling a finger but with a sympathetic look on her face. “You take care of yourself today, and remember what I said last night.”

Newt nodded, receiving a kiss on his forehead before his mother was off to work and he was left alone in the house to his thoughts. Before he got another flood of texts, the blond quickly noted Thomas he was sick again but would see him Sunday, before letting Minho he was still on for that evening.

All he had to do was let time pass by.

 

* * *

 

 

The address Minho had sent Newt wasn’t one he was familiar with. The boy seemed to have a thing for unknown places on the outskirts of the city, and as he drove, he found himself taking in the surroundings of all the things he had never experienced before.

It was getting dark at nightfall, and the streets were lined with trees, all home to lanterns tucked onto their branches, linked with glowing wires. It was one of the most beautiful things Newt thought he had ever seen. He had never expected for the outskirts of his city to be this full of life and colour, it was a wonderfully pleasant surprise and he couldn’t help the small smile plastered to his face in wonder.

Pulling over occasionally in a safe spot to check his text from Minho, he tried to make sense of the directions written, guiding him to a specific street to park down, then on how to make it to the restaurant. Making sure he was going the right way, he noted he was about two minutes drive from where he was supposed to park. Newt didn’t know whether he liked the mild secrecy of the date or not, but he was still partly excited regardless. He tried not to think of what he was going to tell the boy, and had no idea how Minho would respond.

The road Newt had been told to park down was virtually empty, a small deserted street with only a few houses lining either side. He questioned Minho’s direction, telling him he would be allowed to park there for however long he liked, but slammed his car shut and stuffed his keys and wallet into his pocket. Using his phone to light the path in front of him, he came out onto the brighter main road and opened his texts again.

 

**Minho: turn left and follow the road until you get to a crossing. Cross over to the other side and turn left down the street until you get to the loud music**

Loud music? How Newt hoped Minho wasn’t planning on taking him to some club-restaurant thing (if they existed – he was sure they did somewhere), but blew out a breath that caused the hair on his forehead to float up slightly. Then he was walking down the moderately busy street, hands in the pocket of his brown jacket.

He tried to keep his eyes up from his phone, but most of the time he kept glancing back and forth from the screen to where he was walking, mostly afraid of bashing into someone or walking out into moving traffic if he wasn’t careful. Newt was sure he was fine – apart from the fact he had no idea where he was, with only a few brief instructions to go on. He was starting to like the secrecy less and less by the second.

Crossing the road as Minho had told him to do, he paused to look around before starting down the street to his left, filled with bright restaurants that caused him to wince at the light pouring from them. Newt listened out for any extremely loud music, and occasionally even retraced his steps to compare volumes of some music. None were ‘loud’ as far as he was concerned and he was already halfway down the street. This slightly panicked him and he began to look around even more frantically.

Minho hadn’t said to cross to the other side of the street, so Newt was determined to stick to the side of the path he was on, but doubts crossed his mind. He didn’t want to keep his boyfriend waiting, but he also didn’t want to lose his way anymore than he already had.

Newt decided to persevere and walked a little while longer down the street, the crowd thinning out significantly down this end, the lights fading too so it was just a dim glow coming from the smaller cafés. He bit his lip and tried to avoid eye contact with anyone as he glanced around at his surroundings.

Music filled the air as he paced further down the road and stopped, turning around to see where it was coming from, but found no restaurant to his avail. Newt ran a hand through his hair as he pressed Minho’s number and called him, placing the phone to his ear as it rang. His fingers ruffled the slightly gelled hair, messing it up more than its original state, but he could sort it out once he wasn’t so damn lost.

“Hello?” The phone picked up and Newt’s heart leapt in his chest in joy at hearing Minho’s voice.

“Minho!” Newt practically yelled, quickly adjusting the volume of his voice. “Minho, I think I’m lost – I hear music but all I can see is this huge bush behind me and it’s kind of dark.” Newt stared back at the foliage behind him, standing about two times as tall as him.

“Newt, did you go further than the hedge?”

The blonde screwed up his face and let go of his hair. “No…”

A small chuckle echoed down the call. “Walk a little further.” Then the call ended, leaving Newt standing blankly with his cell pressed to his ear.

He shoved the phone into his pocket and rubbed the back of his neck a little as Newt slowly walked forward, eyes trailing over the hedge as if there were a secret entrance through it. Much to his surprise, as he walked a little while longer, there was a corner to the hedge, and peering around it he heard loud, mellow music playing from a beautiful shabby-chic restaurant.

Gravel crackled under his shoes as he walked down the path, more trees with shattered lanterns lighting the way – but the broken glass in the framing made them oddly pleasing to look at next to the building they accompanied. He let his jaw go slack as he neared it and noticed that most of the furniture he could see decorating the outside tables an through the window, appeared to be the kind of things you would find at skips or yard sales that were deemed too old or broken; lining the property they looked perfect and gave it a strangely magical, enchanting look. Thomas’ parents would’ve loved all the décor in their house.

A figure stood up from a large fabric armchair that sat by the entrance and moving closer, Newt could see it was Minho. His hair was gelled up as per usual, but he was fitted down in a blue blazer that hung open to show a white shirt and jeans. He looked extremely broad and muscular in his choice of clothing, and Newt found it hard to trail his eyes away from the boy’s chest. The jock was smiling as Newt approached, making the blond’s heart flutter.

An outstretched hand found Newt’s at some point and they exchanged greetings before Minho guided the two of them inside the building, which was just as much shabby-chic as the outside. They were soon seated amongst the loyal customers, about twenty tables taken in the small, private restaurant. Newt wondered how Minho found such a hidden, beautiful wonder.

The table they sat at was white and the corners had the paint chipped away, on it laid a plant pot with a small fern and their placemats. Removing the reserved sign, the waiter handed the pair of them a menu to ponder over and departed for a few minutes.

“So,” Newt peered over his menu at Minho who was speaking, arms folded across his chest on the table. “What do you think? Is this neat or what?”

Newt placed his menu down and nodded, gazing around at the interior some more, noticing smaller broken lanterns lining the walls next to bottles upon bottles of wine. “It’s incredible… It’s so rustic and beautiful.”

“Not as beautiful as you.” Minho grinned, dimple in his right cheek showing. The blond ducked his head as he blushed, letting out a flustered chuckle under his breath. He returned to rubbing the back of his neck. “Too cliché?”

“A little too cliché, yeah.” Newt laughed. “But thank you. You look very handsome dapper.”

Minho tugged at the lapels of his blazer and smirked, eyes sparkling in the low lighting. “You do wonders to my ego, Newt.”

Scoffing, the blond nudged the jock’s leg under the table, causing both of them to burst into laughter. A few people turned to frown or just look at them as the boys laughed, trying to muffle their outpour with their hands and the arms of their clothes. Luckily their giggles died down enough that they could order drinks once the waiter returned. Minho ordered tonic water and Newt contemplated going for something else, but he too settled on a simple water. He didn’t know how much the evening would amount up to – if he could save a few bucks on a drink, that would be great.

They observed their menus once the waiter had disappeared again and Newt glanced up once to see Minho gazing at him over the list of foods. Newt cleared his throat and shook his head. “What is it? Have I already got something on my face?”

“No, no. Just admiring you, that’s all.”

“Oh.” Newt nodded, almost-shyly. Underneath Minho’s persona, he could sense that something else was there, something he was hiding and he couldn’t quite put his finger on it. To change the subject, Newt tuned his menu towards the Asian and stared down at the list, pointing at a few items of food. “What would you suggest from the salad or steak section?”

“They do a great peppercorn steak here that comes with a side salad. Best of both worlds.” Minho suggested without hesitation, telling the blond that he had been here many a time before this. Did he take all his dates here?

“Sounds great, I’ll have that then.” The menu closed with a clap and Minho did the same after announcing he was getting the special fish of the day (“It’s both delicious and great for brain growth – not a single bad thing about it!”). Notifying their server once their drinks had arrived, they were left alone for what the jock reckoned was about twenty or thirty minutes.

Newt poured the water from the fancy bottle that was set upon their table into his glass, listening as Minho shuffled to take off his blazer, his broad chest in full view now in the white button-down shirt he wore.

The two of them chatted nonchalantly for the rest of the time until their food arrived, decorated beautifully on their plate in a non-traditional posh restaurant way. It was simple and aromatic; Newt could hardly wait to get started on his dish. Thanking the waiter, the two picked up their cutlery and began to dig in.

“I forgot to mention, it’s been two months and three weeks since we started seeing each other. Just in case you’d forgotten.” Minho dropped into their small silence. Newt looked at him, nodding slowly as he cut into the steak on his plate.

“Yeah, wow. Two months.”

“It doesn’t sound like long but I’ve adored every second of it.”

Lifting the fork to his mouth, Newt ate the steak on the end of it, mouth filling with the flavour of the peppercorn sauce and red meat. He nodded once more and hummed in appreciation of the food.

“Good, huh?” Minho smiled, taking the bones out of his own meal.

“Oh god, yeah.” He swallowed, spearing some of the salad. “You were right about this dish—I’ve literally just started but it’s amazing and—“

“I love you.”

Newt’s lips froze around the fork he just placed in his mouth, looking at Minho’s soft features, a small delicate smile on his lips, nothing like the other grins he’d shown Newt over the course of their time together.

Minho _loved_ him?

That was all he had ever wanted. Ever since he had watched _Moulin Rouge_ with his mother on the flight over to America, the words of Christian had burned their way into his mind. _“_ _The greatest thing_ _you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return…”_ Minho loved him. Wasn’t that what he always wanted? Someone that cared for and cherished him, stood up for and related to him?

His memories of the Wednesday evening in the ICT suite flooded his thoughts as he continued to stare at Minho, who seemed to have frozen like everything else around him. The excited fuzzy feeling he had previously held in his stomach was now replaced with the guilt that made him so sick the day prior. He had to tell him…

As Newt opened his mouth, time started again and he saw the look on the jock’s face… his _boyfriend’s_ face, and he couldn’t do it yet. He couldn’t ruin his evening here like that. Newt had to find the right time to tell him of the incident and come straight out and say it, otherwise he never would and it’d eat him up inside.

“I… Me too.” Newt swallowed, the words forced out of his mouth alongside a smile that tried its best to look genuine. _Me too_? Wow, he thought, what a great way to reply to such a heartfelt, passionate statement.

Minho sighed slowly and returned to his food, but his soft loving smile never seemed to falter. Maybe he didn’t mind his response, even though Newt knew it was half-assed and that he didn’t know if he could say it back… yet. If Wednesday hadn’t happened…

 

* * *

 

 

They finished up their meal, Minho insisting he pay since it was his date, though Newt said that if he was forbidden from helping with the main bill, then he would leave the tip from his own money. Minho reluctantly agreed.

As the pair quietly made themselves ready to leave, he thought about how Minho’s demeanour had changed once he’d declared that he loved him, his usual loud, cheerful attitude being replaced with a calmer, thoughtful one that Newt thought looked kind of sad. He had been far from unpleasant the whole meal, but the blond thought something was missing from the jock.

The two of them departed the beautiful restaurant, Newt’s eyes trailing down to where their hands swung beside each other, wondering whether he should take it in his own. Hesitantly, the blond extended his fingers, lacing them lightly with the boy’s. Minho tensed at first, but then moved his hand so their embrace was in a more comfortable position. Newt let out a sigh and smiled softly at the boy to his side.

“Where are we going now?” He asked, looking around as Minho led him onto the street, pausing to stand still for a second.

“I was thinking a walk along the main street…”

Newt saw the boy turn to him and raise an eyebrow as if asking if that were okay. The blond only nodded in return, causing them to start on their ascent up the street towards the brightly lit street, tunnelled by the trees with lamps. Since the sky was darker now, the glowing of the lights were much more vivid and striking, causing Newt to almost gasp at their beauty.

It was so romantic, strolling through the long street, lamps illuminating their path in a multitude of colours amongst shadows. The sky was already dotted with stars, not a cloud in sight. If Newt didn’t know better, he’d say that nature was doing this on purpose, as if Minho had paid it to be at its most beautiful on the night of their date.

They walked further than Newt had when he first arrived in this part of Denver, taking them over a wall that came up to the top of their chests. That was when he frowned in confusion, unable to walk any further. Turning to look back, Newt noticed that Minho had stopped below a lamp on the bridge, looking out at the small embankment and stream that ran below them. As if feeling his eyes on him, the jock slowly turned his gaze back to the blond and lowered his head with a sigh that made his broad shoulders rise and fall.

“Are you happy?”

Newt was startled by his words suddenly filling the air between them. “Minho?”

“Are you happy with me, Newt?” Minho asked again, extending the question a little. Newt frowned harder, swallowing as his hand suddenly felt clammy in the boy’s grasp.

“What—What are you talking about?” He asked, tilting his head, moving his free hand slowly to tilt Minho’s chin up, touch faint on his skin.

“Two months and we should still be in the so-called ‘Honeymoon phase’,” Minho chuckled to hide an emotion Newt couldn’t place. “I know I am. I’m just… Are you happy in this relationship we have, Newt? Tell me honestly – I can cope with anything you need to say. I feel like you’re distant and maybe I’m doing something wrong, and I hate not knowing what to do or if I _can_ do anything…”

Newt’s heartbeat quickened and he felt the thudding against his chest. He knew that this was the time to tell the boy about what had happened in the ICT suite on Wednesday, the sick feeling rising in his stomach so fast he began to taste it in the back of his mouth. Dark, ill thoughts began to twist his mind into confusion, threatening tears and light-headedness. He opened his mouth to speak, eyes widening and watering.

“I saw you and Thomas after the yearbook meeting the other day.”

No. No no no. Minho. Poor, beautiful, innocent, loving Minho didn’t deserve to see what he’d done. He, lying, confused, deceiving, twisted, _cheating_ Newt had done.

Minho deserved the world. He himself deserved the worst.

“Minho… I—He… He kissed me first and, and…”

“And you kissed him back. I know. I saw.” His voice was brittle, as if it would shatter at any second. Minho’s eyes looked tired for someone so energetic and full of life.

Eyes watering to the point his vision as partly blurred, Newt gritted his teeth and shook his head slowly as he looked at the ground. “I’m so so sorry. So, so unbelievably sorry. I was going to tell you, I was, at dinner. I didn’t want to ruin—I’m sorry.”

The sound of cars rushing by, tyres scraping the road filled the air alongside faint chatter and the wind whipping by their faces. Newt wanted to say something more, but all that left his mouth at this moment was a vomit of apologies that the jock didn’t need to hear over and over.

“I said I love you, and I mean that, I do.” Minho’s words sent Newt back to the dinner table as he confessed his deeper feelings, making him feel even worse at that moment.

Newt stepped forward hesitantly, shaking his head faster, not knowing what his body was doing. “I-I do love you… I do, it’s just… I do.”

A sad smile appeared on Minho’s lips as he looked at the blond’s face, taking in every tiny detail from the curve of his nose to the end of his eyebrow, the shape of his eyes to the plumpness of his lips. His eyes parked on Newt’s, really parked as if they were the only things he saw in the entire world, drinking in the warm colour of them. A long sigh left the boy’s mouth as he let go of Newt’s hand.

“Not the same way you love Thomas.”

As if his heart had shattered into tiny pieces inside him, Newt’s chest suddenly felt hollow, but strangely warm. It was like his heart were a phoenix burning to ashes, and being reborn from them to live again as he realised the truth. Minho was breaking up with him, because he knew Newt loved Thomas. And he did, he loved him oh so much.

Newt took a staggered breath and shook slightly, letting a tear fall from each eye down his cold, wind-stricken cheeks. Minho’s warm hand cupped the skin there delicately and used his thumb to wipe away the trail, trying to keep his own composure as he rubbed his lips together.

Then they were kissing, slowly, sadly, knowing this would be the last touch of their mouths together. Newt screwed his eyes shut, but failed to keep more tears running down his cheeks, running onto his lips so his mouth tasted salty. Minho was so gentle and loving, even now, even after Newt had broken his heart. His hands trailed to hold the jock’s waist, feeling the soft fabric of his shirt under his fingers as they tilted their heads to press slightly more into each other, but remaining sweet and fragile in their kiss.

Once Minho pulled away, Newt’s hands slowly circled his wrists by his face. He opened his eyes slowly, water droplets decorating his eyelashes like jewels.

“I never meant to hurt you…”

“I know. I don’t blame you for anything.” He pressed a faint kiss to the blond’s nose and then head before finally letting go of Newt’s cheeks to step back. His feet shuffled and scraped the pavement below and he cleared his throat, sniffing as he wiped his eyes. “Go get him.”

Newt found himself alone shortly after that, not remembering how Minho and he had parted ways or said their goodbyes, or how he had stumbled with clouded vision back to his car. His chest felt so much lighter as he started his car, taking a few deep breaths before he set off on his drive back home.

Minho had set him free because he loved him, but he knew he wasn’t happy with him because he was in love with Thomas, always had been. What had he ever done to deserve anyone like him in his life? People like Minho were the reason the sun shone every day, and Newt didn’t have any idea of how he could ever repay him for what he’d given to him: trust, compassion, companionship and love. He'd lost his virginity to the boy, learned so much from him about himself and he loved him so much. Maybe not the way he wanted, but he did, and that would never go away. But he knew one thing he owed to the boy; he was going to follow Minho’s advice.

“ _Go get him_ ,” Newt mumbled under his breath, turning on the radio as the lantern's light reflected on the car window.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> first of all i am so so sorry for not updating as quickly as i said (i promised two weeks and i think it's been four or so? im so awful ugh) and secondly i apologise for how bad this chapter is. i've been suffering with such bad writers block recently and i just haven't had the motivation to do anything with college coming up soon. i've been stressed with homework and my job and everything but i felt like i owed you guys this chapter, no matter how bad it is.  
> but that's the end of minewt for you - a crappily written end to a pairing i personally love alongside newtmas and i hope that it was tolerable throughout the chapters, and thank you for sticking with me and having faith in me with this side-pairing! your trust and faith means the world to me. and for those who are upset with the end of minho/newt, i may possibly be writing an alternate ending for them as my friend really wants to see what it would be like if they worked out (if any of you would like to see that maybe let me know and i might post it here but im not sure)  
> i cant say when the next chapter will be up, but i hope both the previous two chapters and this one will tie you over for a little bit and prepare you for newt and thomas to meet up on the sunday to discuss.... things :-))))  
> i hope you enjoyed more newt/anne interaction here as she finally accepts her son, some good old texting from the boys and the final romantic minewt ever in this fic. maybe everything is looking up after all  
> please come and [pester me on twitter](http://twitter.com/grantgustins) to get the next chapter up sooner and lets talk tmr and other shiz hehe  
> as per usual, thank you all so god damn much for the support this stupid, silly fic gets - we've now surpassed 15k hits and i am in awe beyond words. thank you thank you thank you! i love you all so much. 
> 
> until next time :-)  
> rosie


	24. twenty four

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter is dedicated to my second in command, maartje and the wonderful era and louisa who make me so very happy. i love you all inexplicably. (❁´◡`❁)*✲ﾟ*
> 
> *:･ﾟ✧
> 
> i wrote this chapter to yiruma's ['river flows in you'](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7maJOI3QMu0) and eyeshalfclosed's ['you are my light in this dark world'](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0PuwF9U9YIc), so if you want to listen to them whilst reading this i think it would give the best experience idk i'm rambling

“Newt?”

“Mrs. Murphy—Lisa, hey!” Newt gasped, out of breath, leaning over to hold his stomach after running from his house to Thomas’ that Sunday morning. He gave a squinted smile; heart racing in his chest as fast as he had ran, pushing his legs as hard as he dared ever since his accident. “T-Tommy texted me to come over here to see him. Is he in?”

Lisa Murphy’s frown disappeared as she listened to the boy and shook her head in response. “Thomas has been out all day, said he would be back late. He told you to come here?”

Nodding frantically, Newt’s brain was whirring. “Yeah, I got this text about ten minutes ago and he said to come over to his special place.”

The sun peaked high in the sky and the heat of the day bore down on the blond’s pack as he continued to pant and regain his breath. He wished Thomas were just in his room and he could go up to him and demand some answers, but now with the ambiguous text the brunet had sent him he felt even more agitated.

“Special place?” Thomas’ mother hummed, “I’m afraid I don’t know where he could be. He sometimes disappears to think but I always presumed he’d just end up at yours. I’m sorry I can’t be of more help, Newt.”

 _He sometimes disappears to think_.

* * *

_“We’re going to this hide out place I found.”_

_Newt turned to Thomas as the car started and they pulled out of the driveway. “And is there any particular reason why this secret place?”_

_“It’s cozy. And it’s just so we can chat away from all the hustle and bustle,” Thomas looked over at his best friend for a split second, a chuckle spreading across his lips, “I promise I’m not taking you there to die.”_

* * *

Newt suddenly felt all the energy rush back to him in his previous exhausted state. He sprung up from his slouched pose, eyes widening as he clicked as to where Thomas would be, waiting for him to show up that afternoon.

“The secret spot.” Murmured words left he blond’s lips without him realising and he started to pace backwards little by little.

“What was that?” Lisa queried, still holding the door open, leaning in to try and understand what her son’s best friend was saying.

“Nothing—thank you for your help, Lisa! I think I know where he’ll be!”

Without another word, Newt prepared himself mentally for the sprint to the hideout he knew the boy would be at. He knew roughly where it was from observing the journey taken before, but he knew it would be a long way to go. After a few deep breaths, he smiled, waved and began to pace his jog towards where Thomas waited.

Why Newt had decided to run the whole journey he didn’t know, but the feeling of the wind on his face, the traffic blaring around him as he ran down the road, soothed him and left him to his own muddled thoughts. He had so much he wanted to ask, the pain of his break up still present in his heart, but he tried not to think about Minho and the look in his eyes as he let him go.

He had known the way Newt had felt and put the blond’s happiness before his own. Newt didn’t know how he had ever been with anyone so sweet, wished with all his might that he could’ve reciprocated the feelings the jock had so clearly shown from the start; Minho had known the way Newt had felt and never would’ve put him through something he didn’t want. How could he ever repay him?

Before he knew it, Newt was running in autopilot, turning every corner and bend on the way to his destination, not even thinking about the way his body was going. He swore his legs had never moved as fast as they were then, let alone before he developed his limp.

Relief flooded the blond once he saw the familiar Toyota minivan that belonged to Thomas’ mother, but that the brunet always borrowed, parked beside the metal steps he and the boy had climbed so long ago. Newt slowed to a stop and ran his hand along the side of the metal framing before he stopped in front of the stairs and looked up. It was quite an ascent up the side of the brick building, but with a few more breaths that filled his lungs, Newt pushed forward, the need to see Thomas overriding his exhaustion.

It felt like he was wading through a lake of lava, his legs burning with every step, each one harder to climb than the next. A permanent frown was painted between his eyes as he gritted his teeth and tried to fight the pain. He kept telling himself he’d get to the top soon, and that every step was one closer to Thomas.

After what felt like years, Newt groaned and looked up, observing one final set of five stairs before he was at the peak of the building, striding ahead to clear them as quick as he could. Almost collapsing as he stepped onto the solid brick surface of the roof, Newt’s legs turned to jelly at both the pain and the sight of the familiar mop of shaggy brown hair sat over the edge of the building.

“Don’t jump…” Newt croaked out, what little breath he had catching in his throat as he attempted to approach his best friend. The blood pumping in his ears and veins made him feel slightly disorientated and faint, but he still walked slowly onwards.

The view was just as majestic as before, sun painting the horizon in a shower of gold, touching the tops of buildings in a way that made them glitter as if they were made of the most precious of all materials. But, despite the almost ethereal beauty of the landscape that stretched before him, Newt only saw his best friend sitting still, legs dangling over the edge of the building, phone resting on the floor beside him.

“Hey, Newt.” The words left the brunet’s lips so softly, if it hadn’t been almost silent up on the roof, Newt would’ve missed them being said.

Finally reaching the edge where Thomas was sitting, the blond lowered himself down slowly to perch on the edge beside him. Whereas before he had been extremely cautious of dangling his legs over the side of the tall building, Newt didn’t give any thought to the action this time, letting his limbs hang loosely in the air as he sat.

It was quiet for a while, the two sat beside one another, only inches between them separating them from touching. Wishing he had thought of something to say on the way up for once he’d arrived here, Newt dug his fingers into the rough bricks underneath him.

A deep inhale of breath was taken and Newt heard Thomas speak, keeping his gaze forwards over the city. “You probably want to know what’s happening…”

Newt wanted to scream and jump up and exclaim the loudest yes he could possibly muster, but instead he turned his head to look at the brunet’s side profile, moles dotting his skin delicately. Licking his lips, the blond nodded slowly and breathed out a small laugh.

“Yeah… Yeah, please. It would be bloody marvellous to know what’s going on inside of your head for once.” It sounded more spiteful than he had wanted it to be, biting his lip once the comment was out. He began to fiddle with his fingers in his lap, the silence rushing over them again.

After a minute or two, Thomas let out a sigh and craned his neck slowly so he was looking at the blond, eyes last thing to turn in his direction. They were shiny and thoughtful, so much hidden in his expression that Newt just wanted to pry out of him. Something in the way he held eye contact with him made Newt’s heart beat fast, but his stomach coil in sadness as a thought passed through his mind.

“On Wednesday,” he started, never looking anywhere but into Thomas’ glistening doe eyes, voice shaky. “Did you only kiss me because you felt sorry for me?”

“Wh—No. No, Newt… I kissed you because I wanted to.”

Face contorting into one of disbelief and confusion, Newt shook his head slightly, mouth opening and closing. “I don’t understand…”

Then, as if his question had hit the play button on a film, Thomas sprung to life, wheeling most of his body round so he was facing the blond, knees pulled up marginally from over the edge. He held a desperate expression, moving his hands around in the air as if he were trying to summon the words to say from the sky around him.

“Newt, I need to tell you everything from the beginning. I need you to listen and… and I’m not sure how you’ll react at the end or what you’ll say, but you need to promise that you’ll just hear me out as I explain everything.” His words were pleading, as if this were his last chance to tell the boy everything before the end of the world. Newt sat there, frozen, eyes wide like a rabbit caught in headlights.

Slowly, Newt let out the breath he’d taken and nodded, heartbeat quickening in his nervous state – because he _was_ nervous, extremely. “I’m listening.”

A brief pause, then Thomas sat back slightly and swallowed, puffing out air upwards that made his bangs wobble somewhat. He looked just as anxious as Newt felt, but the blond didn’t say anything as Thomas tried to figure out how to word his story.

“Okay…” He started, rubbing his veiny hand along his jaw. “First, know that I never meant to hurt you like I did on your parents’ wedding day. When you told me that you… you _loved_ me, were _in love_ with me, I wasn’t thinking straight, didn’t know how to process what you were saying… So I just left you there, and Newt, I am so sorry. I should’ve done anything other than leave, anything other than go to her house…”

The blond watched as Thomas took a deep breath, and he was sure he could see water brimming in his eyes, though it may have just been the sunlight intensifying their shine. Newt frowned, but he had promised to listen so he didn’t say anything in relation to what Thomas meant by “her house”.

“Newt… Promise you won’t hate me for what I have to say next… Minho said you would never hate me but, I need to hear you say it.”

Thomas had gone to Minho? Talked about him when they were still together and said Newt could never hate him? Newt’s heart hurt in his chest, uneasy as he whispered, “I promise… Tommy, what is it?”

The brunet combed a shaky hand through his messy hair, taking his eyes off his best friend for a while as he composed himself. Once their gazes met again, Newt could see the sorry in his eyes as he spoke.

“I had sex with Teresa.” Newt’s stomach dropped and he felt hollow inside, swallowing back the lump in his throat. He had never expected that to come out of the boy’s mouth just then. “I-I thought that it would take my mind off what you had said because my head was completely messed up and that maybe she could sort things out… And we did it and after I wondered why I felt so… _so awful_. I reckoned that it was because I hadn’t told her the truth, hadn’t told her that we – you and I – had been faking our relationship.” Pause, deep shattered breaths came from Thomas as he tried to stop his voice shaking. “So I told her _everything_ – about Minho fake-outing us at his party, about keeping up the charade so we were popular and could win Homecoming kings… She just flipped, started shouting at me telling me I used her. I kept trying to tell her it wasn’t true – I really liked her, or at least I thought I did, and it dawned on me that she was only interested in me because I was supposedly dating a guy. She used me too. And even after all that, even after she told me to go away and I went home, I still felt that same awful feeling inside…”

Newt watched as Thomas ran his hands over his face, biting his tongue to stop the tears forming in his eyes. The blond didn’t think he’d ever see Thomas cry in a situation like this.

“When it got to Monday, I had come to terms with the fact that Teresa wasn’t the person I was supposed to fall for; I realised I still had that weird feeling inside that I thought would’ve gone away once I’d told her the truth, but it hadn’t.” Thomas shook his head and stared at his lap for a brief while. “Then I saw you and I wanted things to just be normal between us… I knew I’d hurt you but I thought the best way to get over that would be to push it aside.”

The memory of that day made Newt gasp slightly, Thomas’ words adding a whole new perspective on his experience.

“And I said I loved you platonically… That look you had on your face with your eyes closed and the shake of your head—my pulse wouldn’t stop pounding in my ears and then I started to think that maybe this feeling, this emotion was something else… It made me feel so uneasy, nervous, because it wasn’t anything I’d ever really felt before.”

 

* * *

_“I-I mean… I love you, platonically.”_

_The feeling Newt had then was the equivalent to being hit by a bus. That was all the clarification he needed; Thomas would never love him back. Not now, not ever._

_He forced another smile, closed his eyes and shook his head. “It’s okay…”_

_When he reopened them, he could’ve sworn he was Thomas’ lip quiver and eyes flicker upwards, hand running through his hair again – a nervous tick he often possessed._

* * *

Newt tried to erase the thought of Thomas sleeping with Teresa from his head and the hurt he felt from it, trying with all his might to listen to what the brunet was saying next. He felt a numbness seep over him with every word admitted to him.

“Since then I just found myself feeling all fuzzy when you were around and I joined the yearbook team to clear everything up… and it did, because that feeling inside the pit of my stomach and that clouded my heart? I could finally put a name to it, Newt. All those times after the wedding that we were together, every single time I was breathing the same air as you, I knew bit by bit that I was coming to accept my real feelings.”

Finally, Thomas paused to catch his breath and Newt felt as if he finally found his voice again as he forced out a sentence he wasn’t sure he even controlled.

“What are you trying to say?”

Curling a fist into his hair for a minute, Thomas licked his lips and looked at the blond as he shook his head. “I’ve been such an idiot. A stupid, horrible, oblivious idiot, Newt and I’m so sorry… But I know now, I know what this feeling is and I know it’s probably too late but…”

Newt’s mouth dropped open and his left eye twitched slightly as all the air got sucked out of his lungs. It was as it he’d just been hit hard in the chest, his heart beating so unbelievably fast, no noise but a ringing filling his ears and head. He may not have directly heard Thomas’ next words, but he sure as hell read them on his lips.

“I’m in love with you, Newt.”

Despite a tear rolling down his cheek in amongst the freckles on his skin, Thomas managed to choke out laughter, an adorable smile forming on his face that made all his features lighten up, putting brightness into even the darkest of places. He was stunning to look at, reduced to his bare feelings, which he was laying out before him. The most vulnerable state Thomas had been in turned out to be the most beautiful to Newt.

“I love you, Newt. I fucking love you and I don’t know if you even feel the same way you did all those months ago, but if Wednesday was anything, just know I have never felt more alive. I’m finally sure of whom I am. All this want for popularity and acceptance and to be noticed was just because I was fighting with who I was inside. Now I’m free, and Newt, it’s all thanks to you.”

Newt was certain he had never seen a smile so radiant as the one plastered across the boy’s face in front of him, and as Newt went to take another broken breath, Thomas turned to look out across the horizon again, cupped his mouth and inhaled, ready to shout.

“I’m bisexual and I’m in love with Nathan Isaacs!”

And Newt knew he wasn’t lying. The small tell above the brunet’s eyes that appeared when he was twisting the truth wasn’t there. The dent that sat by his eyes that had been present for too long had vanished and he could finally read him once again. He really did love him.

That look on Thomas’ face, Newt knew, meant he wanted to either kiss the blond or have him say something. Although Newt would’ve given anything to just lean forward and crash their lips together, his conscience weighed on him too much to do so.

“Tommy… I have something to tell you too…” Newt started, all the confessions out in the open meant he wanted to share his own deep secrets that he’d been hiding the past few months.

Bouncing his leg up and down in agitation, Thomas tilted his head to the side lightly and furrowed his eyebrows. He obviously hadn’t been expecting Newt to have such a serious look on his face after everything he’d told him, but he sat back.

Newt wondered how on earth Thomas was able to put his experiences into words, picking at his nails as he tried to think of a way to paraphrase all the events that had happened to him.

“Are you mad because I slept with Teresa? Because if you are, I understand – I’m mad too… If I’d known—”

“Tommy, stop. I’m… I’m not mad. I can’t be mad.” Newt swallowed and closed his eyes for a second to compose himself. “That same night, I was so angry, mad at you back then for everything, and mad at myself. I was in a messy state myself and I slept… I slept with someone too.”

“W-what? Who?”

Newt winced, thinking about everything that had happened that night with Minho and his consoling and him wishing that he could just fall for the one guy who genuinely cared about him in a way he wanted to be loved. But he couldn’t love him back, Newt had tried so hard, with everything he had he wanted to love Minho, but he was always pulled back to the scruffy hair, constellation of moles and big brown doe eyes.

“I slept with Minho.” He stated, going on to explain he only did it because he was devastated over his rejection and how he thought sleeping with the boy would drown his sorrows and make him feel so much better. It had only left him feeling miserable knowing he’d used the jock. “And then he asked me out… said he’d liked me for a little while before that and I accepted because again, I wanted to get over you, Tommy. I tried so hard, so bloody hard. We dated for two shucking months in secret and still, I couldn’t get over you, even though I had convinced myself you would never feel the same…”

“Y-you were with Minho this whole time?” Thomas bit his lip, still wearing an apologetic face.

As he nodded, Newt sighed and his body slumped slightly. “Until yesterday… H-he broke up with me because he knew I still loved you, told me to go for it even after he said he loved me…”

“I went to Minho after Wednesday… asked him for his advice and he just—he didn’t try and stop me. He told me to go after you…”

Newt felt himself biting the inside of his cheek, tears forming in his eyes as he questioned how someone as wonderful as Minho existed and had given them this moment. Looking up, he could see Thomas thinking the same thing, an expression full of awe decorating his features, eyes shining as he tried to comprehend their friend.

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you, Tommy. I wanted to, I really did, but something was always stopping me.”

“Newt, don’t apologise. You’re not in the wrong. We’ve both done some pretty fucked up shit to both ourselves and each other in this big confusing mess we call life—” Newt choked out a small laugh over tears. “But it’s all out in the open now… We’re a couple of queer non-virgins that are soon graduating from high school and they’ve been through hell but—“

“Tommy.”

“What?”

Newt took a deep breath, the umpteenth of the day; smile creeping onto his face as he stared at the boy before him through watery vision. He moved forward and placed a shaking hand onto the boy’s cheek. “Stop being all poetic.”

His body was on fire as their lips met, but this fire wasn’t some dull burning or overpowering pit of lava in his stomach, it was a rich flame, huge and dazzling as it burned throughout in his veins and heart. He could see the inferno behind his eyes as he shut them and just let himself feel Thomas’ mouth against his own.

They were so close to the edge of the building they could have fallen at any moment they leaned slightly too far, but they pushed against each other, hands feeling for faces and arms and necks and waists. It was a symphony of their lips, the most beautiful of songs being orchestrated around that singular moment.

Nothing could have been more perfect, Newt thought, as they perched there in Thomas’ special place, mouths embracing in the happiest of kisses. Their lips varied pressures, sometimes just grazing the skin, mouths closed, other times they explored with their tongues and Newt had never felt such euphoria. His hand curled in the hair at the back of the brunet’s head, caressing him there as their heads tilted, the sound of their lips and the wind being the only thing audible to them there, along with the feel of only each other.

When they paused for breath, the pair opened their eyes; faces still close and Newt let out a small laugh. “I love you too, Tommy. I always have.”

A dimple appeared at the corner of Thomas’ mouth and the blond leant in to kiss it away, lips lingering there, soft against his skin before they travelled faintly back to capture his mouth in another kiss. Thomas’ hand was on Newt’s back and he could feel him curling his fingers into the shirt fabric there, holding him as if when he let him go the blond would disappear. He smiled against the brunet’s lips. He wasn’t going anywhere.

All those times they’d kissed for an act, lying to themselves, this made up for it. This was real and both of them could feel that as they embraced, kissing slowly in the moment. Newt was sure he could feel Thomas’ heart thudding against his chest, and he was sure the other boy could feel his in return.

They could’ve been there for hours, just exploring each other’s mouths on the rooftop of that high building in the quiet area of Denver, but after a while they began to lose breath and rhythm, their butt’s hurting from perching on the hard ground. As they drifted apart, Newt felt Thomas’ lips press once more softly against his own and then they opened their eyes slowly, as if waking up from a beautiful dream.

As they looked into each other’s eyes, the two of them began to smile so widely it hurt their jaw. Newt found himself reaching for Thomas’ fingers, taking them into his lap so he could play with them and intertwine them. A giggle escaped them both as they looked at one another, faces flushed, lips wet and red.

Newt held up their locked fingers and turned them slightly in the air between them, thinking about how beautiful this whole moment was. How their fingers slotted perfectly together, just as they had done the first time they’d held hands.

“It’s like I’m doing this for the first time,” the blond grinned, eyes crinkling and teeth showing, a smile he did none too often.

“We’ve held hands before, Newt. Many times.”

Giving the brunet’s hand a squeeze in response, he heard Thomas chuckle and looked back at him to see the boy gazing at him as if he were the only thing he could see in that very moment.

“Yeah, but this time it’s real.”

“Real, as in you want to be together, even after all the stories we’ve told?”

Pulling his bottom lip into his mouth, Newt chewed on it lightly, nodding, but now his mind was clear he knew how he wanted to deal with what they were.

“I want to be with you more than I’ve wanted anything in my entire life, Tommy. But I just got out of a relationship, and I think we should give it a month. Thirty days and we can do this. If you want.”

Thomas nodded much to the blond’s relief, his small half-smile still present. “I can wait thirty days.”

I can’t, Newt thought but smiled anyway. He knew inside that giving himself that time to reconcile his relationships with everyone he’d hurt on his own journey of suffering was a good idea. Thirty days was enough time to get his head clear, rid it of all the negative thoughts that had been festering there for months, to start afresh and be with Thomas… in a real relationship.

“Can I… can I kiss you during those thirty days, or is that strictly out of bounds?” Thomas pushed, and Newt could feel already the old Thomas seeping back into the vessel before him.

Newt licked his lips and blushed, nodding. “I could probably excuse some kissing here and there.”

The brunet chuckled and rubbed the back of his neck with his free hand and before they knew it, they were kissing once more, softer, sweeter arms wrapped around one another so when they broke apart they were embraced in a tight hug. Newt could feel the brunet nuzzle his face into his shoulder, and he felt tingles rush up his spine at the action.

“You said you loved me from the day we first met,” Thomas mumbled into Newt’s neck and the blond turned his head slightly to hear him speak. “I may not have loved you the way you loved me from the start, Newt, but I promise I’ll love you until the end.”

Newt screwed his eyes shut tight and he too nuzzled into Thomas, never wanting to let him go as his hands rested on his back, feeling him through the shirt he wore.

Once they finally decided to stand and back away from the edge of the building, ready to make their way back down to where Thomas’ car was parked, they linked hands shyly at their side. It all seemed so foolish, their entire journey to where they were, the entire reason behind them even getting together in the first place, and now them timidly entwining their fingers. It was the simplest of actions but the realisation that this was real and not some pretend action hit Newt right in his chest.

“I never knew you could say such cheesy stuff,” Newt licked his lips and grinned as they paced to the stairs, ready to descend them.

Thomas groaned and rubbed his eyes with his free hand. “Was it really that bad, the whole ‘love until the end’ thing?”

Newt nodded, starting down the stairs ahead of the boy so he wasn’t tempted to watch his ass again like he had done previously. Secretly he hoped that Thomas was checking him out this time, but he didn’t dare turn around to check. His face was red enough as it was.

 

* * *

 

“You boys seem rather chipper today,” Darren Murphy spoke up as he, Thomas’ mother, Thomas himself and Newt all tucked into dinner that evening at the Murphy household.

Newt looked up from his plate, not noticing that he had been smiling at it as he cut up his potatoes. His gaze bounced from Darren to Thomas, to Lisa then back to Thomas, trying with all his might not to blush too furiously.

“Do we?” Thomas piped up, a fake tone of surprise in his voice as he placed a piece of broccoli into his mouth and chewed, unable to hide his smile.

Looking over at Lisa again, Newt could see her mind whirring and putting things in place. He knew she knew something had happened between them today, but had the courtesy to keep it to herself until the two of them decided to tell her on their own terms. God, Newt loved Thomas’ family.

They were careful to keep the noise down as they lay on Thomas’ bed that evening, giggling to themselves as they played with each other’s fingers, placed fleeting, throwaway kisses on lips as they lay back on the duvet, legs on the verge of tangling.

 

* * *

They stuck with the thirty-day plan. Newt knew it was in both his and Thomas’ best interests to not just jump into a relationship they had decided on when emotional and sat on a rooftop. They’d both been through some horrible things and had their own problems they needed to sort out, but it didn’t mean that when Thomas came over to Newt’s after school they kept themselves to themselves. Now that all their feelings were out there, it was almost impossible for the pair of them to not sneak in at least one long kiss a day.

Exam season was upon them, and with everything calming down in Newt’s life, he was able to focus more on his studies to get him into a university. Thomas was insistent on his original choice of Brown, but decided to have some back up local options if his goal wasn’t met. Newt on the other hand was considering History at Columbia, and telling his mother and Steve of his first choice sent them both into tears. His grades were looking good, as he didn’t have to focus on other aspects of his life bringing him down, no longer in a pit of despair.

Others seemed to notice Newt’s change in mood too. When in English, the class were put into pairs and the blond was placed with Rachel, whom he hadn’t spoken to since his little experiment. As they shuffled into their seats beside one another, Newt knew he had to sort everything out with her.

“Rachel, I—“

“Newt, I know what you’re going to say. Don’t worry, it doesn’t matter, the time has passed and you’ll be pleased to know I’ve surprisingly moved on and plan on setting my sights on someone else.” Rachel smiled, long mousy hair cascading over her shoulders. “I’m just happy the time has come when you’re talking to me again.”

“I’m sorry it was a paired task in class that made that happen.” The blond gave a sad smile, only to earn a friendly nudge to his shoulder.

“You seem really happy, more so than you did before when we hung out.”

Newt picked up his pen and twirled it in his fingers, eyebrows raised. “I do?”

Grinning, Rachel began to write the title of the task down and the blond used the opportunity to peer over her head and observe Thomas in his pair, chatting happily with Alby Stein.

“You won’t stop looking at him.”

Newt tore his eyes from the boy and sank down into his seat to the sound of Rachel’s giggles, prompting him to move onto the work and complete it before the end of the lesson. Was he not subtle, or was Rachel just extremely good at spotting small details in people? From the time he spent with her, he concluded it was probably a mix of both.

 

* * *

 

Newt’s routine sorted itself out. Whereas before he had been making himself ill from stress and emotion, going to sleep late, not sleeping some nights because of the thoughts that kept him awake, everything seemed to be righting itself.

After school on the third Friday into his thirty-day plan, Newt decided to head for the track field to watch the team run. He’d only been to a few practices, having to not participate, as he wasn’t able to try out due to his bad leg. But he’d gone to support Thomas in the past, but knowing Minho was there too was all the more reason for him to sit and watch them practice.

From what he’d heard from various ramblings from Thomas, the team had a few events coming up after exams to mark the end of the year and the end of the tournaments so it was vital they show up and train. They’d won three years in a row, and with Minho as captain of the team, Newt wasn’t worried they’d lose that title.

The boys sprinted and paced themselves and stretched and hurdled, all as Newt’s eyes followed the brunet and the boy with the raven hair. He had sat himself midway up the bleachers to get the best view of the two, cheering them on without feeling self-conscious.

Thomas regularly looked over and smiled at Newt, waving sometimes for too long so that he missed the whistle and had to sprint his start in order to catch up with the others. Oh, how Newt loved him.

It was when Minho caught sight of the blond, however, that Newt was afraid and felt his stomach somersault. He raised his hand to wave, but instead, Newt placed his middle and index finger to his head to do the jock’s signature two-fingered salute. The boy paused down below on the track and slowly a smile warmed his face, spreading so that the corners of his eyes crinkled and you could hear him chuckling from down below.

“That’s _my_ thing, Newt!” Minho cupped his hands around his mouth so his voice projected further, before giving his own two-finger salute back. The blond felt relief wash over him. If Minho had ignored him or been hostile to him, he didn’t know what he would’ve done. He meant so much to him.

“I don’t see copyright!”

“Not yet, but soon!” Minho chuckled before he jogged backwards to the track, having to gather up all the runners.

He could see from afar the figures of Minho and Thomas huddled with their team mates, discussing something technical about running – how the sport could be technical he didn’t know, but from what he saw they all laughed at something the jock had said before breaking away, leaving Newt’s two favourite people. Squinting to see, the blond saw Minho place a hand on the top of Thomas’ shoulder and a minute or so later pull him in for an infamous bear hug.

Slinging his bag over his shoulder, Newt strode down the steps to make his way towards where he was to meet the brunet after changing. Thomas had said he would be extra quick so they could get a lift together, but Newt realised he wanted to talk to his ex-boyfriend more, waving him over again as he approached.

“Great running today.” Newt smiled genuinely. The boy’s talent at sports never failed to impress him.

Holding out his arms to the side, Minho shrugged and displayed a cocky grin on his face, one Newt knew he used as a costume. “Are you suggesting my running before now has been less than great?”

Earning a chuckle from the blond, Newt tilted his head to the side and stepped further down the bleachers so he was in front of the boy.

“How are you coping?”

A breath or two were taken in the time before Minho sighed. “I’m okay. How about you?”

Newt tugged on Minho’s arms to wrap himself in an embrace with the boy, hugging him within an inch of his life. He didn’t know what to say to the jock, other than thank him for everything. So he did.

“Thank you, Minho.”

Once released, Newt felt lingering hands on his back that were swiftly removed when realisation hit the Asian. He shrugged the comment off and smiled. “Don’t mention it, honestly. You’re happy.”

“You deserve to be happy too. I owe you, so much more than you can imagine.”

“You made me happy, you don’t owe me anything. I have to change out of this sweaty gear, I’ll talk later, yeah?” Minho nodded and turned to go.

As the boy took a few paces away from Newt, the blond raised his voice. “Hey, Minho?” He turned, tilting his head in question. “There’s… There’s this girl in my English, her name’s Rachel. She’s, uh, pretty cool. I think you’d like her, just so you know.”

“Are trying to set me up?” The boy asked with a raised eyebrow, dimple on his cheek showing.

Newt swallowed and shrugged. “Considering you outed me and Thomas and set _us_ up, I guess I’m just returning the favour.”

“Huh…” A look of consideration passed over Minho’s face, alongside another smirk and then he was gone, running across the track to the changing rooms.

The blond couldn’t help his smile as Minho disappeared, he adored him so much. Aside from Thomas, Minho was the closest thing he had to a best friend, a partner in crime, someone that he could rely on no matter what. He had done so much for Newt that he probably didn’t even realise, even sacrificing a relationship for the blond to find happiness. Not many people could say someone would do that for them, but Newt had been given the treasure of that boy and knew he would do anything for him in return.

As he and Thomas drove home that night after meeting once the brunet was clean, the pair of them fell into conversation about the jock and everything he had done for them.

“I still can’t believe he gave me advice on how to tell you how I felt and he was still dating you…” The brunet pulled up outside the blond’s house, turning the engine off as he turned to talk to Newt.

Shaking his head so his hair splayed out slightly, Newt licked his lips and muttered, “Me neither. He’s incredible…”

“Understatement,” Thomas added, pointing a finger for emphasis as he locked eye contact with the boy. “We wouldn’t even be here if it weren’t for him.”

“I thought you said you blamed him for starting this in the first place?”

“Don’t pin that on me, you know you said it too!”

Soon, Newt leaned in, unafraid to press his lips to Thomas’, same butterflies appearing inside his belly that ceased to go away every time they shared a kiss. It was hard to kiss properly when one of them was leaning over the gearstick of the car, but they had gotten used to it by now with over two weeks of make out sessions in their cars.

Thomas placed a hand on Newt’s waist lightly, supporting him there so he didn’t collapse completely on him, not that he would complain all that much. The touches were fairly innocent, more caressing of cheeks, jaws and hair than anything else too desperate.

Newt wondered how Thomas tasted so distinctly of sugar syrup, then remembered the energy drink the boy had consumed prior to their journey. His usual nicotine and mint taste was almost completely varnished by the sickly sweetness, but Newt liked it all the same as his tongue delved deeper into the boy’s mouth.

Their make out session abruptly ended when Thomas’ hand knocked the horn on the wheel, causing the two of them to jump up and part, fits of laughter erupting from them. Their dishevelled hair and rosy red complexions were lit up with their cheer.

As Newt settled down to sleep that night, he felt the same bubble of happiness fill him up from the inside that he’d been feeling ever since the day on the rooftop. He couldn’t believe the amount of times he had sworn to himself that things would never get better, that Thomas would never love him back in his room, curling up tighter under the covers. Now, he thought as he ran through the routine of his days, he couldn’t believe how ridiculous he had been.

Every cloud had a silver lining, and for Newt, his silver lining had been a combination of many things – the kindness of others, Minho Park, and even the journey he had been on to get to where he was now, after all the suffering, he had turned out as a better person. A better person, in love with his soulmate. His Tommy, who loved him back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> well well well this is where we are folks - this is it! this is the huge event you have been waiting for and i am so so sorry about the shoddy writing/length of this chapter. i have had the worst writers block and intended for the scene on the rooftop to be so much longer than it was, but i just couldn't figure out anything else to write that wouldn't be meaningless.  
> a little throwback to chapter 10 here when they climb this same rooftop for the first time and also rachel makes her reappearance! good to know there's no hard feelings there.  
> the ending is so poor i may rewrite it, but for now this is what i've got for you all and i hope you all enjoy this scene. it was so stressful writing it - i wanted to get it just right and i don't know if i did or not, but i hope it's not totally unbearable.  
> as you know i love comments so much so feel free to leave a message whether its positive or negative (please tell me if theres a mistake or something you think could be done better bc im always up for constructive criticism) and know i love you all.  
> thank you so much for reading this fic - i know i say this constantly but it means the world.  
> ALSO, I SAW THE TST CAST LAST MONDAY AND TUESDAY AT THE LONDON TST PREMIERE AND A Q+A AND THEY ANSWERED MY QUESTIONS BOTH DAYS AN DI LOVE THEM SO MUCH THE FILM IS SO GOOD AND I'M GOINg to stop crying now  
> all the love  
> rosie :-)


	25. twenty five

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a note here that not only is this probably the shortest chapter, but also the chapter that has the least real plot – I guess what I’m saying is that here is what the M rating is for guys. 
> 
> This is my congratulations to you for making it through twenty-odd chapters of torture. It’s probably awful but meh. You guys rock.

Even after the thirty days had passed, Thomas and Newt still hadn’t decided officially if they were now together or not. It was a nightmare time, Newt thought, tapping the end of his pen on his workbooks as he lay on his bed, trying to cram as much information into his head as he could before his first exam of the year the next day. They’d died down on the constantly making out whenever they were in each other’s vicinities front, but Newt knew that neither of their feelings had subsided. After exams, he bit his lip, _that’s when this will all be real._

He and Thomas were going to be _together._ This time for real.

Suddenly his trail of thought wandered to Thomas and how he’d be locked in his own room at that current moment, trying as hard as Newt to go over all the topics for English. They both needed to do well to get into their chosen universities, which was another reason as to why they’d decided to cease fire on the passionate moments of kissing they had in Thomas’ mother’s Toyota Minivan. They had seven exams that spanned the course of one month, and they knew their priorities.

Newt sighed and closed his eyes for a minute, taking a deep breath before he delve back into his book, taking notes on the meaning behind the character’s in his text, stemming off into his own points. He hoped to do English and History at degree level, the only thing making his dream perfect being him getting accepted to Columbia… with Thomas by his side.

 

* * *

 

 

“Deep breaths, as if you were pacing yourself when running.” Minho’s soothing voice talked Newt down from the shaking mess he’d got himself into as they waited outside the exam hall. “In through your nose and out through your mouth.”

“I don’t do running, Min.” Newt winced, biting his already short nails into the beds of his fingers out of nerves.

“You got this, you’re smart. You’re one of the best in the class.” Minho smiled, nodding to him, hand on the blond’s shoulder comfortingly.

Nodding his head so his hair bounced on his crown, Newt silently thanked the boy with a return smile before his eyes began to dart amongst the crowd of people waiting to take their exam.

“Where’s Tomm—?”

“Here! Had to fill up my water bottle!” As if on cue, Thomas appeared in front of Newt and Minho, panting as if he’d just run a half marathon. He clutched his water bottle so tightly in his fist that the plastic began to cave into his grasp. Minho reached out and put a hand on the brunet’s to stop him squeezing too tightly and the boy relaxed, his gaze landing on Newt.

About to step forward and place a quick kiss on his soft lips for good luck, Newt was stopped in his tracks by the exam moderators opening the doors to the exam hall. He felt the air being sucked out of his lungs and he froze as if he were a rabbit caught in headlights. Only when he felt a cool hand take his own and give it a gentle squeeze did he feel slightly more at ease. Newt’s eyes followed the hand up the arm to meet Thomas’ smiling face, trying his best to conceal his own nerves for Newt’s sake before the exam.

This would determine everything, Newt chewed on the inside of his cheek and nodded. He was ready.

 

* * *

 

 

It hadn’t hit Newt that all his exams were over until the day after when he and Thomas were sat with a picnic basket on top of the brunet’s secret spot. Staring out across the city around midday, he realised he only had graduation left with his classmates and then he was off to university – hopefully his first choice.

He felt Thomas place his hand over the blond’s and shuffle closer so their knees were touching. Newt looked over at the boy beside him and smiled, a laugh coming out of his mouth when he noticed the brunet chewing a huge mouthful of one of the muffins he had brought with them,

Thomas grinned toothily, the food in his mouth on full display and Newt shoved him lightly, scrunching his face up in an amused frown. He couldn’t help the chuckle that escaped his lips.

“Gross, Tommy.”

“And yet you still love me. What does that say about you?” Thomas raised his eyebrows and swallowed his mouthful, his thumb rubbing the skin on the back of Newt’s hand so lightly it send strange chills up his arm.

“That I’m an idiot?” He raised his own eyebrows in response, still failing to hide his smile.

Thomas just nodded and erased the distance between them, Newt’s eyes closing lightly as their lips met. It wasn’t forceful and full of fire like their other desperate kisses; this was sweet and relaxing, so much so that Newt felt as if he were floating. He placed his hand on the brunet’s cheek, thumb brushing the skin there in a soft embrace.

“We’re… together, right?” Newt muttered against Thomas’ mouth, only the sound of their breaths and lips audible to him all the way up on the top of the building. He was afraid to open his eyes and meet the brunet’s chocolate gaze, but he did so and saw the boy falter.

“Of course. W-why would you ask that now?”

Newt shook his head, “No, no that came out wrong. It just all seems surreal, like I’m in one of my daydreams. I mean, I love you and you love me, we both finished our exams, we have a month and a bit to wait until we get results, uni acceptances and graduation… it’s just…”

“Life.”

“Yeah, life.” The blond chuckled breathily, leaning back into Thomas for them to continue their kiss, forgetting all about the rest of the picnic they had to eat and the buzzing of their phones as texts came through from various acquaintances, none important enough to break their embrace.

The two lay back on the picnic blanket, Thomas hovering over Newt, both their eyes shut so nothing could distract them from the motion of their lips, like waves of the ocean, pushing and pulling in a constant flow. The blond returned to holding his _boyfriend’s_ face, caressing his cheek, one hand moving to tangle fingers into the shaggy locks at the nape of the boy’s neck. He needed a haircut, but Newt knew he’d miss the feeling of holding his hair tightly whenever they kissed like this.

Hot air escaped his nose in a long breath, shuffling around on the blanket in an attempt to find a comfier position to no avail. Thomas’ kisses seemed to gain speed and force as he leant down into Newt, arms supporting his body either side of the blond’s head. His heart began to pump blood faster around his body, especially down to his loins. Was what he thought was happening actually happening?

Newt leant up slightly, elbows supporting him as he pushed forward to capture Thomas’ lips in a deeper kiss. However, as he did, blush creeping onto his face, Thomas made a noise and pulled away, rubbing at his forehead. Newt peeled his eyes open, lips still parted and leaning in until he saw the brunet chuckle and tilt his head to the side.

“Newt,” he began, eyes narrowing with a smirk on his lips. “Did you think we were about to have sex up here on a rooftop?”

The rosy red of Newt’s cheeks suddenly burned a deeper crimson, mouth opening and closing like a fish. “Wh—How did you…?”

Another small laugh escaped Thomas and with a lick of his lips he pointed a long slender finger towards Newt’s crotch. The blond frowned until he looked down and saw the small bulge there from his hardening cock. He gulped and stared back up at Thomas who seemed to be blushing himself. Newt was mortified, placing his face into his hands with a shake of his head.

“I’m so embarrassed.”

“Hey, no, don’t be… It’s kind of flattering actually.” Newt heard Thomas console cockily, reaching to pull away the blond’s fingers from his eyes. He sighed and looked at Thomas, chewing on the inside of his cheek. Shuffling around a little more, he watched as Thomas moved to stand, holding out a hand for him to grasp and help him stand; he smiled and accepted, ascending from the floor.

Thomas began packing away all their bits and pieces, slinging the basket and blanket over his shoulder. He stepped forward, reaching for Newt’s hand. Their fingers laced together and the blond stared down at them for a second or two, moving them about an inch or two.

“Should we head off? I think my mom wants us to watch a movie with her later.” Thomas suggested, smiling in a way that warmed Newt from his very core.

With a nod, Newt walked with Thomas towards the stairs at the edge of the building, all the time running thoughts through his head. How could he have been so stupid? Of course he and Thomas weren’t going to have sex up on the roof, so why had his brain told him it was extremely probable. Was it something inside him that desired the entire ordeal again, or was Thomas sending off signals and being a tease? He couldn’t pin it entirely on either, but his body knew that if it did happen, Newt would readily give himself up to the boy before him.

They had over a month of free time before their results came in, anything could happen in that time now they were a _couple_ , Newt thought.

 

* * *

  

“Do you have it?” Newt’s eyes were wide with anxiousness, one hand gripping the sealed envelope resting against his forehead. The other hand clutched his cell phone to his ear so hard the skin there was burning.

“Y-yeah, I just picked it up – I’m on my way over right now.” Thomas answered over the line; nerves clear in his voice too.

Taking shallow breaths, Newt swallowed. “Good, good. You haven’t opened it have you?”

“No, we’re opening them together! We’re going to be the first ones to see our own results and university acceptances and then the second people to see each other’s.”

“Exactly. Mum and Steve are at work but they told me to text them as soon as I opened the letter. Brenda’s also out, she went to Aris’ after opening hers.”

“She opened her results?! How did she do?” Thomas almost yelled down the phone, so desperate to know.

The blond had to bite his lip, heart swelling in his chest. “S-she got into Oxford. She’s going to university in England! God, Tommy, she studied so much harder than me. She deserves this so much.” The grin wouldn’t leave the blond’s face as he thought about his sister and how he had woken up to her squealing downstairs. He had raced to her and she’d jumped into his arms screaming about her university place, Newt hugging her so tightly in shock she had squirmed to get free.

“Holy fuck. That’s incredible! Brenda always was a genius under that popular, tough cookie exterior.”

Thomas arrived at the house shortly afterwards, knocking on the door in his unusual fashion. It was the kind of situation that warranted the use of the door for Thomas rather than the window. When Newt opened he door to the brunet, the first thing he saw was the gleaming white envelope in the boy’s veiny hands. He swallowed and invited him into the empty house.

The two raced upstairs, shutting the door behind them even though there was no one to intrude on them opening their final results and acceptance letters. Once in the room, the two just stood still in the middle of the carpet, clutching at the envelopes, terrified to open the seal.

“Let’s just do it.” Thomas spoke up, voice shaky as he glanced up to Newt.

“Yeah. On the count of three,” Newt agreed, hands trembling as he turned the letter to where he could easily rip it open.

“One…” Thomas breathed out, sucking his bottom lip into his mouth.

“Two…” The blond piped up, closing his eyes as a sick feeling rose in his stomach.

Then together, in sync the two of them let the final count burst out of their mouths. “Three!”

The sound of ripping paper filled the distressed air as the teenagers pulled open the envelopes that would reveal their future for the next half a decade. Newt ran final wishes through his mind in a frantic state, taking deep breaths as he pulled out the folded bit of paper he could see had his name written across the top.

He unfolded the letters, eyes scanning the useless prattle about graduation he’d worry about at a later date before flipping through to the page with his grades. Then it hit him – he’d gotten a letter about graduation, which meant…

“I-I passed! Every single subject! Even _history!_ Oh my god, _Newt_.” The blond was startled by Thomas’ sudden outpour, throwing his arms up in the air, punching it in triumph.

Newt stared down at the sheet that held his grades. He couldn’t believe it. A’s all across the board. Even in maths.

He blinked once, twice, thrice to make sure he wasn’t hallucinating or seeing things on the paper in front of them. Swallowing, Newt shot his gaze up to Thomas and felt a disbelieving smile creeping onto the corners of his mouth. Without further ado, the two shoved their papers towards each other and scanned the grades presented before them. To Newt’s relief Thomas had got mostly A’s as well, aside from his B in history, which he seemed proud of in any case. He couldn’t help but beam at the brunet as he flipped through his pages. When the boy paused and held out the page in front of him, he yelled in what Newt hoped was happiness and turned the paper around for Newt to see.

 

**Columbia University**

**In the City of New York  
**

**Columbia College Office of Admissions**

_Dear Mr. Isaacs,_  


_On behalf of the Principal and the Committee of Admission, I want to congratulate you on your acceptance to the University of Columbia to study English Literature and History for the Semester starting Fall 2016._

 

“I…” Newt began, unable to form a coherent sentence. He took the letter into his hands and read through it ten times more; still not believing it was real after that.

“You got into Columbia!” Thomas ran his hands through his hair, holding them there as the blond looked up at him, watery-eyed and in a state of shock. His body was pumping him full of adrenaline, so much so that he could barely move.

Thomas took his own letter into his hands and read the placement he was offered for his university. Newt took deep breaths, sick feeling lingering despite the news being good. He realised he still felt that way because he didn’t know if Thomas got into Brown or—

The brunet shook his head but didn’t look upset, more like okay with whatever he’d been put with. “I didn’t get Brown.”

“Tommy, I’m so sorry, you—“

“Newt,” Thomas stopped him, eyebrows raised in a calming way, smile on his face, “I got into NYU. Do you know what this means?”

Mind fuzzy from everything, Newt swallowed and winced, shaking his head as Thomas stepped closer to him, hands on his upper arms.

“We’ll be in New York City together!”

The news hit Newt like a punch to his chest, heart pounding in his chest. They’d be together in the city that never sleeps, studying at two separate universities but with no three hour drive between them, more like a half hour one. He’d be with Tommy.

“I can’t believe it.”

“I know,” the brunet chuckled, biting his lip as he beamed at his boyfriend, “you just can’t get rid of me now.”

Newt smiled so wide his jaw hurt, pulling Thomas forward to read through his letter again before the brunet caught his face in his hands and began to kiss the boy over and over on the mouth.

“I’m,” _kiss_. “So proud,” _kiss_. “Of,” _kiss kiss_. “You!”

Their lips opened against each other, allowing Newt’s tongue to meet Thomas’ in his mouth, cocking his head to the left to press further against the brunet. His hands tossed the letter aside, curling into the fabric at the front of the red shirt Thomas was wearing that day. He couldn’t pull him far enough into him, noses brushing as they changed the position of their heads, still kissing wildly.

His hands were cold against Newt’s flushed cheeks and they stayed there even as the brunet pulled away from their embrace to stare into the blond’s eyes. When Newt gazed back, Thomas’ pupils were dilated, breathing ragged and the blond swallowed, his own blood pumping loud and fast in his ears. The shine of saliva on the brunet’s wetted lips was the last straw.

It wasn’t long before they crashed their lips back together and they were tripping over each other on their way to Newt’s bed, hands gripping at anything they could pull at on each other. The blond immediately resorted to combing his hands messily through Thomas’ hair as the back of his knees found the edge of the bed and he sat himself down. Unfortunately letting go to shuffle back into the middle of the mattress, Newt lay on his back hesitantly waiting to see if the brunet would join him.

He could already feel the throbbing in his jeans and as Thomas came into view; hovering over him with messed locks and perfect moles dotting his skin, Newt couldn’t help but tug his soulmate closer, pulling him on top of him so their lips met again.

They didn't stop to breathe as they kissed hungrily, mouths open and eyes closed in bliss. Newt’s legs were spread unwittingly, his body acting out of impulse in his horny state. Thomas half-straddled his legs and it surprised the blond when he moaned into his mouth at the clash of their tongues. The sound was delightful, music to his ears and caused Newt to feel a twitch down below in his underwear.

“Tomm—Thomas.” He panted as the brunet attached his lips to the blond’s throat, kissing down the length of it, stopping at the adam’s apple. “T-Take off your clothes.”

He was embarrassed when the words left his mouth, but his current aroused state fueled him to act that way, trying with all his might not to arch his back at the feel of just Thomas’ lips on the bare skin of his neck.

“So demanding,” the brunet almost growled, making Newt try and hinder a whimper as Thomas sat back, allowing the blond to see him grab the hem of his shirt and pull it up over his head. His hair was already a state, but the removal of his top did nothing to help tame it.

What felt like an eternity later under Thomas’ gaze, Newt sat up and pulled his own garment off, leaving the two of them very half-naked and roused. It wasn’t that they hadn’t seen each other shirtless before, because they had many times, it was just those times had never been this kind of situation.

 _Oh God_ , Newt was hit all of a sudden as Thomas leant back in to place wet kisses to the expanse of his neck, he’s about to have sex with Thomas. They’re going to make love, he thinks, nerves suddenly kicking in because even though neither of them are virgins, Thomas had never had sex with a guy before and Newt had no idea what he’s doing because the last time was mostly Minho taking control.

Newt felt a pressure around his crotch that wasn’t just his cock straining at the fabric of his underwear, so he opened his eyes briefly to see Thomas’ fingers there, pulling at the button that held them together. He paused to pull away and place a kiss to the blond’s mouth in reassurance, before Newt lifted his pelvis and allowed Thomas to pull him free of his trousers.

Shedding his own clothing, Thomas settled between Newt’s legs again so they were both close and only in their underwear, lips and faces red as they were completely turned on by the sight before them. It was just a lot of silence for a while as the two of them admired their partner’s form, before Thomas began to kiss Newt on the mouth, pressure varying as their tongues darted in and out, trying to overpower one another. Newt let Thomas win and they fell into a rhythm that included Thomas’ hand massaging small circles into his side with his thumb that is doing nothing to quell his growing arousal.

He was completely hard and throbbing in his underwear and again, the shame was kicking in as Thomas shifted and his skin met his clothed erection. As Newt began to go and apologise for being so turned on already, he was stopped and groaned when he felt the brunet rutting against it, hand trailing down from his face to place over the top of the bulge.

Newt tried to keep his thoughts coherent, but as Thomas began trailing his kisses along his jaw to his weak spot under his ear alongside his hand palming at his clothed dick, he knew that was completely impossible. He cursed and just then he knew there was something he had to get.

Newt sat up painfully, not wanting to pull away from what he would call a scene close to euphoria. This earned a confused look from the brunet as Newt ordered him to stay right where he was as he’d be right back in a second, before darting down the stairs, heading for the door.

Throwing it open, Newt prayed to whatever God there was looking down on him right now that what he was looking for was still in the glove compartment of his car. He unlocked the vehicle, yanking at the handle of the draw so that half the clutter fell out onto the seat, including what he was looking for.

He snatched the pharmacy bag, peering inside to see if all the things he bought for the threesome were still there, and they were: condoms and lube. A quick muttered thank you under his breath saw Newt locking the car, racing back to his house mostly naked and barefoot, before running as fast as he ever had run before up the stairs to pounce back onto the bed, and subsequently onto Thomas.

Their lips crashed again, fighting another stupid battle as they lay back, condoms and lube dropped onto the duvet to their side. Newt couldn’t help but smile, even through his anxiety as the two finally agreed to remove their final layer.

They were naked, completely exposed in all their flaws to one another. Except they saw no flaws, only perfection in human form. _Horny_ human form.

The wet sounds of their lips would be obscene to anyone listening in on them, mixed with their moans as bare skin rubbed against one another. Newt moved his toes and wrapped a leg further around Thomas’ waist as they rubbed against one another, completely free from boundaries on the bed.

Their kissing ceased for a minute, both pausing their activities inches from their faces. Their breathing was heavy and fast, eyes roaming the features decorating their skin. Newt knew this was the point of no return; he wants Thomas inside him. The eye contact they make confirms they both want to do this, cheeks flushed in the extra rush of blood alongside their awkwardness of being together this way for the first time.

“I love you,” Thomas whispered so quietly through his breaths that Newt almost missed it, but they’re so close to one another he managed to pick it up, heart continuing to thud against his chest.

A smile presenting itself on his lips, Newt felt their foreheads touch. “I love you too.”

“H-how do you want to do this?”

Newt could hear the uncertainty in the brunet’s voice, mixed with the desperation to continue with what they were doing. Swallowing so his apple bobbed, the blond licked his lips and took a deep breath.

“If I g-guide you through it, do you want to…?” He left the question open, but he knew Thomas understood that he wants him to top. The brunet then gulped himself and nodded carefully, not wanting to knock their heads together too forcefully before they’re consumed in each other’s embrace again.

He felt Thomas’ hands on the skin of his side, too shy to move them further down despite his previous risk of touching him through his underwear. Newt pushed deeper into his mouth, pulling at his hair with one hand whilst the other trailed down Thomas’ back, hesitating before reaching out to grab the scattered condoms and lube on his bed.

Thomas went back to kissing at Newt’s weak spot and the blond could already feel himself leaking pre-come with every nip at his tender skin under his ear. He pushed him away so he could hand the brunet the small tube, upset that his lips were no longer on his neck or anywhere at the moment. Thomas’ hands were shaking lightly as his long fingers curled around the item. Newt bit his lip at the thought of them being inside him in just a while. That realisation made him almost moan on its own.

Muttering reassurance to himself, Thomas popped the cap and looked back into the blond’s eyes before he went to coat his fingers in the substance. “You’ll talk me through it?” Newt nodded, though he didn't know if anything coherent would come out of his mouth once they got started. “Okay, because the last thing I want to do is hurt you.”

Another nod confirmed he was ready and their lips met again before Newt observed Thomas sit back and squeeze out the clear liquid onto his fingers. He resisted the urge to stroke himself at the sight of the brunet’s lean body before him, hard and leaking just as much as he was. The sight eased his shame of his own predicament a little.

“Just go slow.” He added quickly, and Thomas nodded as if he would never consider doing anything else.

Opening his legs when he saw the brunet shuffling around into a good position, Newt didn’t expect the kiss to the inside of his thigh before he felt wet fingers pressing against his entrance. Newt sucked in a breath, taking his bottom lip between his teeth as he hears Thomas ask if he’s ready. He can only whine before he feels his finger pushing in, stretching his inside.

“Bloody fuck…” Newt groaned, squeezing his eyes shut as his hands grasped at the duvet beside him, remembering feeling the exact same strange sensation as his first time. He presumed it was always this way, feeling so unfamiliar, but oddly that excited him.

Face contorting into a strained frown at the pain that went along with the feeling, Newt relaxed and cursed again once he felt Thomas’ finger full inside him, widening him as carefully as he could. He was sure he could still feel the brunet’s hands shaking slightly, the foreign sensation causing him to curl his toes as the boy gradually began to pull back out and push in again.

The action happened for a minute or so before Newt spilled out that he could add his second finger now, Thomas obeying before he warily drove the second digit in, burying himself up to his knuckle. His fingers curled as the blond instructed him to do in a moan.

That’s when Newt felt it, the wave of pleasure spread through his body, one that would’ve turned his legs to jelly if he were standing. He gasped and hummed, peeling his eyes open to see Thomas watching him, eyes wide and full of lust as he pressed back in the same spot once more. Another jolt of joy sent Newt wanting to arch his back, but the hand still on his side, rubbing circles there prevented him from doing so. He knew Thomas had found his prostate, and with that, a new confidence began creeping into the brunet as he began to move his fingers faster, stretching as much as he could.

They were both already perspiring, adrenaline pumping through their veins as the third and final finger was added. Newt was a panting wreck, wanting more than anything to just have Thomas inside him already, and he could feel fro the furious thrusts of his digits that the brunet was anxious for the same.

“T-Thomas… fuck.” He managed to curse, attracting the attention of his boyfriend. “You can take them out now… I think that’s enough.”

Suddenly Newt felt the pressure inside him ease and he was empty, asking for himself to be filled up again. Taking deep breaths, Newt ran a hand quickly through his sweaty hair and licked his lips, glancing over at the condoms to their side. Thomas followed his gaze and immediately grabbed at one of them, examining the packaging.

Newt blushed and bit down on his lip. “I don’t know if they’re the right size… I just made an assumption and…”

The packet made a satisfying ripping sound and the blond’s eyes watched as Thomas tipped the condom onto the palm of his hand. “I think it will be fine. They stretch.”

Another swallow and Newt was suddenly watching as the brunet took his cock into his hand, holding it steady in his large palms. Newt had never been so lightheaded and turned on in his life. The condom slipped on over the tip of his erection and down the length, rolling on easily with the help of the pre-come already spilling.

Humming, Newt grabbed at the bottle of lube and handed it back to Thomas for him to slick up the outside. He didn’t know if it would do anything major, but if it would make the whole thing easier and less painful for him, it wouldn’t hurt to have it. So Thomas did as he was instructed and chucked the items aside.

After a beat, the two met in a kiss that made Newt feel like he was floating once again, as if he were outside of his body in some kind of phenomenon. His hands gripped at the hard, slender back of the brunet, groaning into his mouth as they rutted against one another. He didn’t feel as if he were in control of himself, so much so that the blond secured his lips to Thomas’ ear.

“Can I ride y-you?” The question surprised Newt himself as the words escaped his lips, kissing at the skin of his ear, taking the lobe in between his teeth in a way that earned a whimper from Thomas that Newt drank in.

All Thomas could reply was with a small noise in the back of his throat, and Newt took it as an invitation to flip them. He looped his leg around Thomas’ bare back, close to his ass and threw their weight to the side, causing them to roll. Newt was then straddling his lower body, diving down to join their lips together once more, kisses as hot as the Sun and never enough. He wants more, so much more.

He had to mentally prepare himself as he pulled back slowly, the brunet’s lips desperate to stay on him in some form, attaching themselves to his neck for as long as it’s there. Newt tried to keep his eyes from rolling back into his skull, and found pulling away is the best option.

This left him staring down at Thomas below him, glowing in his pre-sex state, pupils dilated, blood visibly pumping in the protruding vein in his neck, hair a complete sweaty mess and they haven’t even done the main deed yet. Newt wished he could’ve captured the sight with a camera, but it would never do Thomas justice.

Taking Thomas’ hands in his own, he placed one on his waist as he raised himself and shuffled back. He was hovering over the brunet’s throbbing length, placing Thomas’ other hand onto it to secure it in place. He decided holding his breath would be the easiest thing to do.

Eyes meeting, they both shared a non-spoken word of “ready” before Newt was sinking down, taking Thomas into him like he always wanted.

It burned, he wasn’t going to lie, a lot more than he thought it would, and he knew that with even a minute more preparation time, it would’ve been better. But they were desperate and they were there now. Newt let his head loll backwards and mouth open to moan as he took him fully into him, feeling Thomas deep inside.

“Fuck,” He heard Thomas spill out, hand previously on his dick making its way to Newt’s side to join the other, supporting the blond as he began to rise back up and down. Fuck was right, Newt thought as he blabbered incoherent noises from his mouth.

Easing himself slowly up and down, Newt let his creased brow relax from its frown, muscles all over his body relaxing as he led Thomas in what to do. However, he couldn’t shake one thing from his mind: He and Thomas were _having sex_ —making love. Thomas’ cock was buried deep inside him as he sat back down, sending shivers throughout his entire being. Thomas and he were _one_. Holy shit.

Then Newt let out a strange, caught in his throat moan as Thomas hesitantly reached out and took his dick in his hand, stroking it to take Newt’s mind off the dull burn of his insides. If Newt could’ve expressed himself then without stuttering, he would’ve cursed and told Thomas just how good that felt. Scratch that, better than good, he just can’t think of a word perfect enough at the moment.

When Thomas began to get braver, Newt encouraged him to thrust up into him in time with his rising and falling movements, wriggling around as he sunk deep onto his dick over and over until—

“Oh god,” Newt moaned the loudest yet when he felt it. Thomas’ cock had found his prostate and that same wave of euphoria washed over him, causing the blond’s jaw to fall slack and this time his eyes can’t help but roll back into his head. He couldn't help but be vocal now, moans just flowing out of his mouth with every thrust into his prostate.

Thomas was grunting and groaning too, their noises becoming a lewd symphony for only their own enjoyment. Their skin was slapping like percussion alongside the music of their erotic sounds. Newt thought Thomas being as vocal as he was, was one of the hottest things he has ever heard.

That’s when he knew it wasn’t enough. He could feel something brewing quickly in his stomach, but not fast enough. Newt was sweating profusely, hands gripping at bed sheets and the skin at Thomas’ sides—anything he could hold onto that was solid and supported him.

“Faster, Tommy.” He tried to demand, but it sounded more like a hoarse plead than anything. Fuck, he meant it. He needed more. He needed Thomas to completely consume him so that the only thing he could feel was his length inside his body.

Once again obeying, Thomas shut his eyes harder and cursed, pounding faster and harsher into his body, hitting Newt’s sweet spot over and over. His inhibitions were completely gone and Newt could see vibrant colours dancing behind his eyelids with every thrust.

They gained speed in their fucking by the second, wanting more and deeper and soon Thomas was balls deep into Newt and it was so hot—both literally and sexually—the blond could hardly stand it. He had never felt so alive.

Newt could barely sit up straight anymore, the feeling in his stomach feeling like a pool of fire that was ready to blast out of him at any second. His arms fell onto Thomas’ chest and his fingers attempted to curl into the skin there, one of the brunet’s hands holding onto his back. Newt was begging for release, the combined feeling of the stroking of his cock with the feeling of Thomas’ own dick inside of him getting too much for him to bear.

He knew Thomas was practically drooling on the verge of his own climax; deliberately moving his hips around a little more so the pressure was even greater. That was all it took.

Newt was swearing as he threw his head back and came all over Thomas’ hand, every drop of energy draining from head to toe as he released. Unlike his first time, Newt wasn’t afraid to cry out his lover’s name.

“ _Tommy_ …”

His words are what sent Thomas over the edge and as Newt was left panting and gasping for air, he felt a sharp heat fill him inside as the brunet orgasmed. He rode him out for as long as he could, trying to draw out his climax despite feeling absolutely exhausted. He was the most tired he's sure he’s ever felt, but also the most overjoyed. His heart swelled to five times its original size when he listened to the symphony of Thomas’ gravelly, hoarse voice moan out his own name.

“ _N-Newt_ …”

Their thrusting slowed gradually until Newt collapsed forward onto his boyfriend, their skin sweaty and Newt’s warm come dotting Thomas’ stomach so they stuck to one another; the blond didn’t care. It was perfect.

He felt empty once more as Thomas slowly pulled out of him a minute or two post-orgasm, leaving him to curl into the brunet once the condom was taken off and discarded into the waste bin across the room by the door. He ran his hands over the skin of Thomas’ chest and smiled up at him drowsily.

Kissing slowly, the two smiled against one another’s lips. They’re not kissing to win a fight this time or have it lead to anything, no, these were innocent, sweet, as if making up for all the dirty things they did just a few seconds prior. It’s a thank you, a congratulations and an “ _I love you”_ all in one and Newt wants nothing else in the world at that moment than the boy beneath him.

Once they pulled away slowly, lips red and swollen, they held their stares for a while, Thomas’ pupils shrinking back down to their normal size and to their perfect doe eyed gaze.

“Woah,” Newt grinned, dimples appearing in his cheeks, voice barely above a whisper.

Thomas chuckled and the blond could feel his chest rising and falling beneath him. He was real, what they had done was real, he and Thomas had _made love_ , everything was real, especially the smile of complete and utter adoration displayed on the brunet’s face. “I know.”

They pressed their lips together once more before Newt nuzzled into his neck and they wrapped their arms around one another, sighing deeply as they held each other close.

“Was it as good as it sounded?” Thomas spoke up through a slight yawn, Newt’s eyelids remaining closed as his eyelashes brushed the skin at Thomas’ neck. They refused to move in any way, even to get dressed or clean themselves off and the blond just nodded, sweaty hair shaking a little.

“Even better.”

“Better than… before?”

Newt nudged his side, and couldn’t help but let out a small breathy chuckle. This was just like when Thomas had asked if he was a better kisser than Minho and now… “Does everything have to be a competition for you?” The brunet hummed what Newt presumed was a yes in response. “And as a matter of fact, it was. I love you, Tommy.”

Arms caressed Newt tighter in their hug, feeling Thomas’ lips gentle against his crown. “As for me, that was better than anything I’ve ever done before.”

“Better than when you won gold for your cross country and track races a year or so ago?” Newt raised an eyebrow, breath hot against the bare skin of the brunet’s neck.

“By a million times.” His words caused Newt to smile again, the expression now permanently plastered on his face. “And Newt? I love you too.”

Newt wasn’t sure he believed in heaven, but if there were any, he bet it would never live up to the day he had just experienced. He was going to an Ivy League university, in the middle of New York City, where Thomas—his boyfriend, his soulmate, the _love of his_ life, would be living with him and they’d just now celebrated by having the hottest sex Newt could have ever imagined. Nothing, he was sure, could compare to just lying in Thomas’ warm arms. Not even close.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so nervous posting this because is the first real fic kind of smut I have written, so go easy on me but I hope it was okay! But after twenty four chapters of nothing, here is Thomas and Newt's first time with each other - bumbling, bashful sex that i hope is kind of erotic otherwise I just suck.  
> Like I said at the start, I always knew this chapter was going to just be porn without much plot and most certainly the shortest chapter, but hopefully it's still enjoyable!  
> I tried to add a few bits leading up to the big event at the end because I thought they wouldn't just rush into it, even after agreeing to date officially. AAAANND now they're going to nyc to live together. Things are just going perfectly for them aw  
> Let's hope things stay that way in the final chapter for y'all. Fingers crossed?  
> un-beta'd af as per usual gah why did we never sort this problem? please point out any mistakes!
> 
> ALSO, since this is the penultimate chapter of the newtmas faking it au (sad face), I thought now was the time to ask you which parts you would like to see from Thomas' point of view as I think I will write three-to-five chapters of events from his side of the story maybe. 
> 
> Thank you so very much for sticking with this fic through all its ups and downs. I'm serious when I say you guys rock. You duh best :-)  
> all the love, [rosie](http://twitter.com/grantgustins) ˚‧*♡ॢ˃̶̤̀◡˂̶̤́♡ॢ*‧˚


	26. twenty six

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> dedicated to all of you, whether you've been reading since the first chapter was uploaded or just recently stopped by. thank you. ♡´･ᴗ･`♡

Turning the hot water on in his shower, Newt sighed as he stepped under the stream, soaking his hair and sliding over his smooth, pale skin. He was tired and limbs drooping but it felt as he could breathe for the first time. Placing his hand against the wall of the shower, Newt closed his eyes and smiled, not even noticing the pain beginning to burn in his lower regions.

Thomas was wrapped amongst the sheets in his bed where the blond had told him to stay and get some rest for a while, and knowing that once he was finished cleaning up that that was what he was going to be faced with upon his return made Newt’s heart flutter in his chest. He wasn’t ashamed or regretful like his first time, just so completely and unbelievably head over heels in love.

Making sure to wash himself thoroughly, he spent a little more time in the shower than he had hoped before switching off the faucet and grabbing a towel to dry himself off. Newt wrapped the towel around his waist, tucking the fold in under the fabric so it stayed up as he walked, before giving his teeth a little brush and returning to the room with a small half-smile on his face.

Expecting to find Thomas sat up, smirking at him as he re-emerged, the blonde was instead greeted by the soft sounds of muffled snoring coming from the bed. The white sheets were a haphazard mess on top of him, covering his bare body and Newt couldn’t help but roll his eyes and grin.

It was past midday, near quarter-past two and he knew his parents would be back in a few hours, so there was time to let Thomas nap before he roused him to get dressed. So, pulling on a fresh pair of boxers, Newt then shuffled back to the bed, crawling in beside his boyfriend, avoiding the patch of drool on the pillow as he lay his head down.

Newt didn’t know when he fell asleep, but he presumed it was during the time he began counting the constellation of freckles on the boy’s face, skimming his fingertips lightly over the pale skin of his cheek and admiring that even in his post-sex state, Thomas was the most beautiful thing Newt had ever laid eyes upon in all his years upon the Earth. He hadn’t expected to fall asleep, but when he heard the ringing of keys in the door downstairs and the shuffling of feet on the wooden floor, the blond jolted awake and knew his mother was home from her work at the local television station.

Yawning and rubbing his eyes, he smacked his lips and looked at the clock beside him. The display read twenty-seven minutes past five and he quickly realised that next to him lay the naked body of Thomas, arm somehow draped over his abdominal region as they had snuggled together in the sheets. He pinched the brunet softly, but hard enough to stir the boy from his slumber with a sharp inhale of air.

“Tommy, wake up,” Newt murmured, “my mum’s back and you need to get up.”

“Mmmpfhh…” Thomas groaned incoherently as Newt tossed the covers aside and darted up to change into the clothes that he had worn earlier, that were scattered all around the floor from their activities. He pulled on his jeans and shirt as he heard Anne calling up the stairs to announce she was home. Newt once again tried to rouse his boyfriend by throwing a sock at him before he made his way out of the room, scooping up his university acceptance letter as he closed the bedroom door.

He hoped Thomas would shake off his sleep-ridden state soon and stay as quiet as possible as he made his way down the stairs. Newt ruffled his hair with his hand so it didn’t look totally post-sex and the letter in his grip sent a shiver through his spine when he remembered what it was for.

Reaching the floor downstairs, he caught the back of his mother as she slid out of her cat-heeled black shoes and admired herself in the mirror, spotting her son behind her. Anne turned and Newt said a quiet hello to her, smile on his face.

“You look very happy with yourself,” Anne grinned back, hand still working at her hair to make it all the more bouncy, “what’s up with you?”

Newt opened his mouth to speak, but all he could do was laugh and cover his face with his hands. He felt completely giddy, an unusual feeling for him the past few, tough months. Taking a deep breath, his shoulders stopped bouncing from his chuckling and Newt held out the letter towards his mother.

Anne cocked her head to the side and stepped forward a little, Newt taller than her by a few inches, taking the letter into her manicured hands. The blonde woman turned the letter over to see it addressed to Newt from the University of Columbia, eyes lighting up.

Observing as she pulled the letter fully open, Newt chewed on his lips and had to stop himself rocking on the balls of his feet as Anne scanned the paper, taking in everything that was said. Her red lips mouthed the words, Newt’s heart beating fast as if he were reliving the moment a few hours ago all over again.

Time seemed to stop when Newt’s mother looked up from the letter. Her eyes were watery, and the deep breath she inhaled was fragmented before she cried out a noise of complete joy. Newt felt cold palms on his cheeks, holding him so gently, lovingly before they were holding each other tightly in an embrace. The blond nuzzled his face into his mother’s shoulder, smiling so widely it hurt as he felt Anne’s shoulders moving from what he knew was her crying.

They say most comfortable hugs last three seconds, but Newt dismissed that, happily holding him mother for as long as he could before she pulled way, one hand returning to his cheek as the other rubbed away her tear-stained cheeks.

“My beautiful boy,” she swallowed, shaking her head in disbelieving awe, “I never had any doubt in you that you could do this. I’m so unbelievably proud of you, Newt.”

She was proud of him. That was all Newt had ever wanted.

Newt had been there when Brenda had opened her letter in the morning, as were Steve and Anne who lit up like a Christmas tree when they saw the brunette beaming the widest she ever had at the paper in front of her. He had been so scared to disappoint his parents, but seeing his mother there, expression pricelessly ecstatic, the feeling from the morning melted away to nothing.

Anne held the letter to her chest and bounced on her feet, exclaiming she was going to frame the paper the first chance she got, and that she couldn’t wait until Steve was home to share the amazing news. Honestly, Newt couldn’t quite believe his mother hadn’t keeled over with how overwhelming the grades of her children were.

“Do you know how Thomas did? Or that lovely boy that you had round a few times before?” Anne asked, voice laced with happiness and genuine curiosity.

“You mean Minho?”

“Yes, that’s him. Heard from either of them on their grades?”

Newt’s mind suddenly travelled back to Thomas upstairs in his bed, still possibly completely naked under his sheets. He could feel the blush spreading on his cheeks, so he swallowed and tilted his head to the side.

“Thomas got into NYU, which he is more than happy about and it means—“

“You’ll be in New York together? Oh, Newt, that’s so wonderful.”

“I know! I still can’t quite believe it—I don’t think I’ll ever full believe it, even after a year of being in the city with him!” The words spilled out of Newt’s mouth like a raging waterfall he couldn’t stop from falling.

The blonde woman’s face was still uplifted in a smile, “and Minho? You’re still his friend, right? How did he do, do you know?”

“I, uh, haven’t asked him yet.” Newt scratched his head, suddenly feeling the need to run to the phone and call his friend to ask how his grades were. “But I was thinking of maybe meeting up with him for coffee tomorrow to see?”

“That sounds like a wonderful idea.” His mother sang as she began to retreat backwards, “Now, I better start getting dinner on the go. I’ll prepare your favourite dessert as a congratulations – apple pie.”

Watching his mother disappear into the kitchen humming a happy tune, Newt bit his lip and span on his heels before running upstairs, taking two steps at a time. He bolted into his room; opening and shutting the door so noisily it rattled the door like a tiny earthquake.

“Where’s the fire?” Thomas smirked, pulling his socks on as he perched on the edge of Newt’s bed, now fully clothed, yet with just as bad a case of sex hair as Newt had woken up with.

Returning to his bedroom, Newt definitely noticed the smell of sex he had been faced with as he entered, and set a reminder in his mind to spray some sort of cologne or air freshener in the room later to mask it. For now it was fairly pleasant, a reminder as to what they had gotten up to earlier and the thought made Newt smile as he paced over to Thomas and perched beside him.

Not answering his question, the blond leant in and pressed his lips against Thomas mid-sock pull, grinning against his mouth. Newt had brushed his teeth a little earlier so it masked the post-nap breath they both had and he brought a hand up to curl into the back of the boy’s shaggy brown locks. Their mouths were slow and careful, no teeth or tongue, just closed eyes and blushing cheeks. It was all so innocent and lovely, the complete polar opposite of the frenzy they had been in earlier that day.

“Mum said how pleased she was that you would be in New York as well.” Newt said inches away from the boy’s mouth as they pulled away to breathe. He peeled his eyes open gradually, gaze flickering up to meet Thomas’ warm chestnut brown eyes.

“She did?” Thomas’ eyes had a shine in them Newt has never seen before but it made his heart swell as he nodded in response. “I—My mom will be just as happy, I imagine.”

Sniggering sweetly, Newt let his eyes fall to his lap. “Probably even more. She’s still acting as if us telling her about our relationship was the same as if she won the lottery.”

The two let their fingers entwine and they played with them for a while, Newt’s fingers thinner, but just slightly shorter than Thomas’. Nethertheless they slotted together perfectly and they held one another’s hands for a few passing minutes, only letting go as the front door was heard to signal another arrival to the Isaac-Despain household. As their hands slid apart, the blond was quick enough to bring the back of his boyfriend’s hand to his mouth, lightly pressing a kiss there in a swift, soft movement.

“I better go,” Thomas shuffled about, pulled the last sock on and stood, staring down at Newt as he ran a hand through his knotted hair. “My mom and dad should be home and I have to go tell them the news.”

The brunet paced over to his shoes and letter on the floor, pulling the footwear on before swiping up the paper that held his acceptance to university. With a turn and a smirk, the boy backed towards the window and threw it open.

“Get home safe.” Newt said in adoration, still perched on the bed as the moving downstairs started to get louder – his sister was definitely home.

A final nod from Thomas saw his – attempted – quiet departure from the blond’s room, leaving the bed a complete mess and Newt rubbing his face as he began to chuckle. He lay back on the ruffled duvet once he heard Thomas land safely on the ground, staring up at the ceiling through his fingers.

Thinking back over what his mother had said as he recalled his final few moments with Thomas that day, Newt reached for his phone and pulled up his contacts, sending a text to someone very specific about getting together for coffee. The reply came quick, but not as quick as usual, yet it accepted. With a butt-load of emojis.

Newt couldn’t help but giggle.

 

* * *

 

 

“I think my dad took both our news pretty harshly.” Brenda laid her empty bowl of apple pie on the side beside the sink as Newt continued washing up after their dinner. “You can still hear him crying in the lounge from here.”

Although her words were blunt, Newt could hear the disbelief as well as sorrow in her voice as she spoke. Nodding, the blond took the bowl he was washing out of the soapy water and placed it on the side. Brenda caught it and swiped up a cloth to help dry off the crockery.

“He’s proud of you—you’re going to Oxford. That’s a huge deal and it’s in a whole other country, Bren. It’s going to take him a while to get used to.”

With a tut, Brenda nudged Newt’s side and rolled her eyes. “You’re speaking as if he isn’t proud of you also, moron. We both got into some of the best universities and it’s overwhelming. Sure, I’ll be in England but you’ll also be away from home! The birds have to leave the nest sometime.”

“Yeah, but I’m only going to New York – that’s a short plane journey away. But England—“

“Will be great. Dad’s never been and neither have I.” Brenda cocked a smile, reaching for another item to dry as she spoke. “And if it’s anything like Anne has told me, I’m sure it will be a blast.”

“A rainy, windy, cold, stormy blast, yeah.”

Flinching back, Newt shut his eyes and made a face as the brunette dipped her hand in the bowl of hot water and flicked the concoction of washing up liquid and water at her stepbrother’s face. He wiped away the soap and scoffed, flicking his already drenched hand back at her so she had to turn away and squeal. Here’s to say they continued having a mini-celebratory water fight for a short while following, shrieks and laughter erupting from both their mouths until they started to lose gusto.

Their hair was drenched in patches, sticking to their scalp, clothes dampened and dripping water onto the tile floor. Brenda grinned widely, teeth flowing, eyes squinted as Newt shook his head like a wet dog trying to rid itself of the water. They looked a mess, but their happiness overruled everything.

“Promise to video message me loads when you’re in England.” Newt ran a hand over his face before tilting his head to the side.

Rolling her eyes, the brunette continued to chuckle and punched her brother’s arm playfully. “You know I will, silly. I need a constant update of all the stuff I’m missing over here from someone. I guess you’ll have to do. You and Thomas that is.”

“What about Aris? Couldn’t he tell you what’s going on over on this side of the pond?”

“We broke up – today, actually. The thing is, I’m not sad about it. Just goes to show how time changes, doesn’t it?”

Reaching out with a soft smile on his face, Newt placed a hand on the top of her arm before dropping it back to his side. Although they’d started out their relationship not standing one another’s guts, Newt had always wanted a sister and now couldn’t be more grateful that it was Brenda.

“I’m going to miss you.”

“Don’t go all soppy on me just yet,” Brenda wrinkled up her nose, placing the final clean dish on the side, grabbing a towel to dry her hands. “Save that for graduation.”

 

* * *

 

 

The warmth of the coffee cup scolded his hands as Newt held the china in his palms, raising it to his lips to take a sip. It was a hot day, but he’d read somewhere that drinking hot drinks when it was warm was supposed to cool you down – apparently. Either way, the blond sat by his lonesome in the corner of the café at the edge of Denver, origami birds hanging from the window beside him.

As he swallowed, the door opened allowing a gust of chatter from outside into the teashop, along with a gaggle of customers. Going to take another sip, Newt stopped, sat up straight and placed the cup back onto the table momentarily as he spotted whom he was meant to be meeting.

“Minho!” Newt called out as loudly as he dared without disturbing the customers around, waving his extended hand in the air for his good friend to spot.

The runner smirked, raising his fingers to his head to two-finger salute Newt as he approached the front of the queue, received a drink and turned. He wove in-between the mass of tables that had been stuffed into the room for the demand of customers that day, until he finally reached the bond.

Newt beamed at Minho as he sat, pulling at his black t-shirt so it didn’t stick so visibly to his chest. He looked good, as if his olive skin were glowing in the sunlight through the window, but there was something else about him that Newt couldn’t quite put his finger on just yet.

“Lucky you got here early to grab a table,” the jock chuckled; placing his coffee on the table as he shuffled his chair under it a tad more. “If we’d both been late we probably would’ve had to sit out in the gutter.”

“That wouldn’t have been too bad – it’s a nice day.” The blond shrugged, still smiling as he tapped the side of his cup. “I hope you don’t mind that I ordered before you got here.”

With a wave of his hand to dismiss the comment, Minho also shook his head. “Don’t worry about it. Traffic kept me for a while, so I don’t blame you. How are you doing?”

Newt nodded, licking his lips after another sip of his hot drink. He pondered on whether he should strike up a conversation before hitting the nail on the head as to what college Minho got into. He wanted to ease it in, but his body overruled his thinking as he swallowed and blurted out his own position.

“I got into Columbia.”

It was short and sweet, if a little blunt, but Newt watched one of his closest friend’s eyes light up and mouth open and close in disbelief. The blond couldn’t help the smile on his face, jaw strained from the amount of it he’d been doing lately.

“A-are you serious?” Minho moved about in jolts, moving to stand up then stopping himself. But Newt nodded, sucking his bottom lip into his mouth to chew on. “Columbia?”

“To study English Literature and History, yeah.”

“Oh my god… Oh my—Newt!” Minho leapt up then, the table almost tipping if Newt hadn’t caught it before Minho made his way around the table to pull the blond up into the tightest hug he’d ever received. Newt chuckled, arms wrapping around the athlete’s back and he couldn’t help but bury his face into his friend’s shoulder as he felt Minho’s hands rubbing his own back, holding him there.

When they let go, Newt stood with his stupid smile on his face and Minho grinned back, quickly placing a peck to the boy’s cheek in a congratulations. The pair made their way back to their seats and Newt ran a hand through his hair before taking his mug in his hand again. His eyes settled on Minho, who was tucking himself under the table again before taking a large gulp of whatever drink he had ordered.

“Wow, Columbia… That’s—That’s unbelievable, man. I’m so stoked for you. You deserve it so much.” The Korean teenager ran his own hands over his face and then played with his fingers, raising an eyebrow. “Who would’ve ever have thought that I would have dated an Ivy Leaguer in high school? That’s something to put on my permanent record.”

Newt giggled, shaking his head until he rested it on the palm of his hand, elbow supporting it on the table. “You’re ridiculous.”

“I’m charming.”

After a pause to take in everything that had been said, Newt decided it was time to ask about the boy opposite him who was so content to talk about the blond’s own acceptance rather than his own. It made him worried, but still he pressed on.

“So… How about you? Did you get into your chosen college yesterday?” Chewing on his lip subtly, Newt felt his heart race. He hoped more than anything that Minho got into his first choice; he deserved it more than anyone he knew—aside from Brenda.

“I did…” Minho lowered his head, moving his mouth around for a little bit before he looked back up at the blond. Newt let out a sigh of relief and smiled.

“Minho, that’s so—that’s amazing. Congratulations—“

“But I didn’t accept it.” He cut him off and Newt faltered, blinking a few times before he took in what the athlete had said.

“I’m sorry, I—I don’t understand… You didn’t accept it? What do you mean you didn’t accept it?”

“It was the local college: okay stats and all that, but I turned it down. It was top of my list for so long because I never thought I could get into anywhere else. But I turned it down.”

Newt still didn’t understand, moving in closer to the table so he could lean over it, eyebrows furrowed in confusion as he watched Minho speak. He didn’t look upset, in fact, a smile was spreading across his face like the first ray of sunlight in the early dawn.

“Newt, I got a scholarship…” Minho exhaled, “To the University of Florida. Full-ride. They saw me at one of my many sports games and approached me because I didn’t approach them first. They said they wanted me for the sports programme and would be in touch. I got the grades and that’s why I turned down my first choice. Holy crap. I’m going to Florida in the fall.”

It was Newt’s turn then to sit in shock, mouth open, eyebrows raised all in complete and utter happiness for the boy. He expressed his joy through tiny breaths of laughter, moving his hands about before reaching across the table to tap the athlete’s hand.

“Minho, that’s just as amazing as my news. That’s just wonderful. Congratulations!”

“I never thought I’d be good enough to get into one of the top sporting colleges in the US.” Minho coughed out a chuckle and raised his fist slightly in a silent cheer. “Go Gators and all that.”

Eyes shining, Newt felt his heart swell. Everyone around him, friends and family were thriving, getting into the colleges and jobs of their dreams and he couldn’t believe his luck. He had never felt so elated in his life; it was all so overwhelming he could feel himself beginning to tear up.

With a sniff and a wipe of his nose, he nodded and grinned toothily. “You’ll have to get me tickets to one of your events at some point. I’ll fly from New York to come see you run, dunk, dive, dodge—you name it, I’ll be there. Tommy would be up for it too. God, Minho, everything’s just falling into place perfectly.”

“I’m happy you’re happy, you know that?” A dimple appeared in the dark-haired boy’s cheek and Newt sighed, mouthing a silent thank you to Minho. “It was kinda hard to get past whatever we had at first, but I’m okay. I think getting into UF really took the edge off everything and helped me past it.”

“I don’t think I’ll ever forgive myself for what I put you through,” Newt bowed his head now, staring into the final remnants of his drink.

“Hey, come on now. You have to. I mean I’ve forgiven you—I never blamed you.” Minho spoke wisely. “So don’t hate yourself. You have Thomas and I’ve got—“ When he cut himself off, the blond peered back up at the boy to see him smiling to himself. “You know how you kinda possibly suggested to me that I should get to know Rachel from your class? I may or may not have asked her out to a movie and she may or may not have said yes and been totally awesome and all that… But just maybe.”

“Just maybe?”

The jock raised an eyebrow and smirked, grabbing his coffee cup so he could hide his expression behind the object. Newt could see right through him though and he was more than happy that the two of them had agreed to go out and had gotten along despite Minho’s embarrassed cryptic ‘maybes’. He liked her. Newt was glad.

The coffee shop was just as busy as it had been on the day of their big arcade date, the chatter of customers around adding a nice background track for the two to chat to quietly, sharing stories of anything they’d missed in one another’s lives in the past couple of weeks. They fell into talking about graduation and speeches and what they were both going to do in terms of decorating their grad-caps.

“We’ll always stay in touch, right?” Newt worried his lip, chewing on it so it became sore until Minho nodded.

“Of course we will. Didn’t you just say you were going to come to some of my sporting events? Well, if you ever have anything going on in New York, sign me up to be there. You’re one of my best friend’s man, whether you like it or not and I’m not saying goodbye to you just yet. Not until you’re old and wrinkly and still watching me on a television in my last sporting game ever.”

He couldn’t help but laugh as they finished up their second round of drinks, Minho nudging him cheekily under the table with his foot until they fell into conversation as easily as ever. Newt adored that about the boy across from him; they were so comfortable with each other even after everything that had gone on between them and he couldn’t have been more thankful. He didn’t know if he would have ever managed to get a hold of reality if he’d lost one of the most important people in his life. Newt’s only regret was that he wished he could’ve had longer to get to know the raven-haired boy. But they weren’t saying goodbye any time soon, and that thought alone with the help of Minho’s expressive, contagious laughter etched a smile onto his face that he knew he’d be wearing until the very last second of the day.

 

 

“Have you decided what you’re going to do to decorate your graduation cap yet?” Thomas asked as he swung Newt’s hand, the pair of them entering the familiar suit shop they often found themselves in whenever a big event popped up at school. The two had arranged to pick out new clothes to wear under their bright blue graduation gowns that day, and it had been the brunet who suggested they return to the trusty shop that had been there at their every waking call.

The blond frowned a little as the two pulled apart their intertwined fingers to rifle through a few stacks of neatly folded shirts. He hadn’t really considered what he was going to do to the top of his grad cap, what kind of message he wanted to send to all his graduating peers.

After a minute of humming to himself, Newt tilted his head to the side and held up a crisp, white shirt in his size. “I’m not quite sure. I don’t want anything too cliché or extravagant, but I want it to be memorable. It’s tough.”

“I’m having the same problem. I thought maybe if you had an idea, we could’ve shared the wisdom or made it a two-part thing.”

“That doesn’t sound like a bad idea,” a familiar voice called out behind the couple and they craned their heads around to remember whom it belonged to. As the tall Hispanic man approached, he wore a wise smile on his face that radiated out a genuine sense of welcome and happiness to see the pair of them again.

“Hermanos! So good to see the pair of you once again.” He clapped a hand on both their shoulders, squeezing almost affectionately. “What can I do you for?”

Newt returned the smile as he remembered that the last time he had been here was to pick out a suit for his mother’s wedding, only to be told by Jorge to get him back. Now here he was, with Thomas as his actual boyfriend, no longer in the predicament he’d fallen captive to only a few short weeks ago. There was a tiny glimmer in the storeowner’s eyes that told Newt that he had known they would be together; the blond couldn’t help but blush and smile.

“We’re looking for shirts and ties – the fancy kind.” Thomas spoke up, glancing over at Newt. “And we kind of want to match.”

“I see,” Jorge flashed a toothy grin and took a deep breath. “What sort of colour were you desiring for the tie, muchacho? What shade is this graduation gown of yours?”

“A bright blue, so whatever you can suggest would be a lot of help.”

With a nod and the promise that he’d be back in a minute or two, Jorge shuffled off to choose a selection of ties that he believed would suit their outfit best. Newt and Thomas occupied the time by sorting and picking out their shirts, settling on two slim fit cuts without a shirt pocket.

Happy with their outfits, they walked them over to the counter where Jorge reappeared and lay out two ties beside one another. Both were a misty grey but whereas one was shiny and plain, the other exhibited tiny black spots along the fabric.

“This one,” Jorge held up the simple, block silver tie against Newt’s aloft shirt, “is for you. And the other for you, my friend.” He handed the second tie to Thomas, who received it gratefully and looked over at Newt.

“Thank you so much,” Newt nodded, grateful for all the help the man had given them over the course of the year, albeit subtle.

“My pleasure, hermano. I’m glad you followed my advice.”

Newt tipped his head as a blush crawled up his neck and over his cheeks. He knew exactly what he meant, but Thomas furrowed his brows for a while before letting go of the comment.

After paying and bagging the items, Jorge congratulated them both on their pending graduation and reminded them that if they ever needed formalwear, he’d be right there to help them. It earned a light chuckle from the couple and Thomas promised that if anyone expressed that they needed a suit or dress, he’d send them right his way. Newt agreed.

A final smile was cast between them, waves in motion and the bell to the shop rang a final time as the two departed, free hands reaching back to wrap around each other and weave their fingers. The blond cast a look over his shoulder and he was certain he could see a grin on Jorge’s face as he saw and winked at Newt before he disappeared out of sight.

 

 

“Make sure you take a yearbook!”

Newt cast his eyes around at the decorated school field, rows upon rows of chairs spread far and wide over the expanse of the grounds. It made his stomach somersault to see just how many of his classmates were there, fully clad in the bright blue graduation gowns, decorated graduation caps perched atop their styled hair. The whole thing made the boy suddenly self conscious, reaching up to reposition his own cap on his hair – styled with a new pot of gel he’d received from Steve as part of a set of gifts he’d received from his parents.

There were tables of refreshments and various other activities that outlined the area as he was swept up in the swarm of people entering the field. Newt tried to steady himself, looking around to see if he could find his following family in the hoard behind him. No luck, he thought as he peered over as many heads as he could, only to be pushed to the side and towards the table where the yearbooks were being handed out by Zart and two other members of the yearbook team Newt regretfully couldn’t remember the names of.

“Make sure you take a yearb—Newt!” Zart ceased his yelling; lowering the raised album from high in their air, back down to the safety of his chest. “Looking sharp, man! Have you got a yearbook yet? I mean, you should, considering you helped make this thing.”

With a lick of his lips and a shake of his head, Newt replied, “No, actually. I just got here so I haven’t had the chance to pick one up.”

“Here!” The curly-blond haired teen grinned, pushing the black book into Newt’s chest, hands only just visible underneath the too-big gown Zart was wearing. “It came together perfectly.”

Newt’s eyes fell to the book he was now clutching, thumb running along the faux leather of the cover before he looked back up at his friend. “Thanks, Zart. I’ll take a look at it once I find my family and sit down.”

“Sure thing. And hey, good luck up there. It’s a real honour to be asked to give a speech before the ceremony.”

A jolt in his stomach made him feel sick as Newt was reminded of the upcoming events of the day. Headmaster Janson had called him and four other students (Brenda and, surprisingly, Teresa among them) into his office to ask them if they would be happy to give speeches, as they were the students that achieved outstanding results throughout their time at high school. He had felt sick as he reluctantly agreed, and being reminded helped the same exact feeling resurface.

Newt forced a smile, mind racing with all the things he had prepared to say as it counted down the minutes until he had to deliver it. With a small nod, Newt swallowed. “Cheers. I’ll catch you later.”

People suddenly engulfed him and Newt just about managed to break free as they stormed the yearbook table, all wanting a copy to flick through the pages of high school memories, both good and bad. It was like he was lost in a raging sea, unable to catch his breath until a firm hand found his arm and yanked him free.

Taking a gulp of air, Newt blinked and found himself face to face with Thomas, huge smile painted across his features. His same enticing doe eyes stared back at the blond and he suddenly felt a wave of reassurance through him, as if he were finding out the world was okay again.

“I thought I saw your cap near the yearbook stall,” Thomas laughed, tilting his head down for Newt to observe the adornment they’d agreed on.

Decorating the rest of the plain blue cap was a layer of card, neatly cut to fit the dimensions of the top, painted with a dazzling night sky. The dark card held dots of white that looked like stars and buildings lining the bottom like that of those in New York; in the middle of the constellations the words read, ‘ _if you can make it here…_ ’. It was half of a quote they’d agreed on alongside the general design, but promised that they wouldn’t show each other the outcome until the day of graduation. Thomas’ had turned out beautiful, Newt thought, heart fluttering in his chest enough to take his mind off of the impending speech for a while.

“It looks perfect, Tommy. Absolutely perfect.”

The brunet rose back up, continued to grin and shrugged, nose wrinkling adorably. “I spent a hell of a long time on it. Let’s see yours up close, then.”

Pressing his lips together tightly, Newt imitated the stance Thomas had held moments ago, lowering his head so that his boyfriend could see the design he’d done on his own cap.

Similar to Thomas’, Newt had pictured a sky above the city of New York, but this one was bright and like the most beautiful summer’s day ever experienced in the Big Apple. The end of the quote was curled and fancy, suiting the theme and read, ‘ _…then you can make it anywhere_.’.

“It was good from far away, but it’s a masterpiece up close.” Thomas’ voice signalled for him to rise until once again the couple were face-to-face. “We look quite the pair.”

A warm touch was felt by Newt as his hands were taken into Thomas’, pulling him slightly closer despite the bustle of people around them. The crowd noise was overpowering, but also strangely calming. It all merged into one soundtrack as the two blocked out the sights around them and leaned in slowly…

“There’s my favourite duo! Boys, come over here!” Frypan’s familiar voice sang out to them, interrupting their thoughts and as a result, their pending kiss. Thomas moved his tongue around his mouth in slight annoyance and rolled his eyes, Newt looking round to where their friend stood, manning his food shack.

It was a surprise to them both that he was there, but despite him breaking up their moment, they were more than happy to see him. They were both pulled into tight hugs by the larger man, patting his back affectionately as they pulled away.

“Y’know, when I got asked if I would cater for this graduation, I was hesitant at first—then I remembered that it was both of your school and I snatched up that opportunity in a flash.” Fry explained, answering the silent but questioning faces of the couple before him. “Had to leave the diner for Winston to run with a few of my kitchen staff, but I wouldn’t pass up an opportunity to see my buddies graduatin’ and moving on to New York City! I’m so proud of you both.”

As their friend handed them a complimentary drink, the two thanked him and hoped everything went smoothly for him. Fry chuckled to himself and folded his arms before looking around at the few staff members he’d brought along with him to help out. They looked busy, eyes wide and lips pulled tight across their faces in stress as they handed out burgers.

“I’m so glad the pair of you worked everything out. Don’t get too lost in each other in New York and forget about lil old me now, will you? Don’t you two get busy doing other things.”

Hoping that he wasn’t insinuating anything dirty, Newt let out a quick laugh, noticing Thomas do the same to his side. They hadn’t regretted telling Frypan that they were officially together, he was genuinely so pleased for them but he was sometimes over the top with what he said.

“Oh, and Newt—“ The cook called out as they parted ways, causing the blond to turn back to him with a curious look on his face, “knock ‘em dead with that speech of yours, yeah?”

“I—Thank you, Fry!” Newt stuttered, eyes wide as if he were a rabbit caught in the headlights of a car. They began to water and he turned, breath uneven, chest and stomach tight with the sick nervous feeling he’d possessed all day. When Thomas’ hand slipped back into his and gave it a squeeze, it eased some of the feeling, but the time was near now and he couldn’t shut the fear out.

They walked further into the gathering of people, all crowding around their seats with their friends. Newt hadn’t seen his mother or Steve since the moment he’d gotten out of the car and they had promised to be back as soon as they found a space to park. It was all weighing up on him then.

It took Newt a while to realise they had stopped moving and were just stood still in the centre of the crowd. His eyes flickered around to find something steady to look at and hold onto, which was when Thomas moved into his line of sight once more, face soft and reassuring.

“Hey, hey. Newt, listen to me, okay?” He began, hand moving up until the blond felt it, cool against his skin as his jaw was held and caressed so gently, that simple action alone made him fall in love with the boy before him all over again. “You have to trust me when I say that there is nothing to worry about. You are one of the smartest, kindest, most amazing people on this planet, yeah? If anyone is going to kill that speech, it’s going to be you. You spoke in front of a crowd almost as big as this at the homecoming pep rally, just draw on that and you’ll be fine.”

“I said one thing at that rally, Tommy. This is completely different.”

“But you still got this. I promise you that you’ll be fine – you won’t mess up. You’ll speak from the heart like at your mom’s wedding, then. I know that wasn’t exactly the greatest of circumstances, but you did it.”

That was when the speaker systems on the field started playing the school theme and a voice welcomed everyone to the event, advising graduates and their parents to take their seats as the ceremony would be starting in a number of minutes.

“Okay, okay.” Thomas himself took a huge breath as his gaze – previously focused on the sound system – moved back to Newt. The crowd around them began to move faster then, taking their seats in the neat rows set up prior to the event. “Newt, you were chosen to speak for a reason, remember that. The headmaster has faith in you; the student body has faith in you, your parents, and peers… _I_ have faith in you. Trust me. You’ll do something amazing.”

That’s when Newt felt the embrace disappear, as he was directed by whom he presumed was one of the faculty, towards the front stage where he was to be seated until his time came. Newt continued to look at Thomas, who was stood with a hopeful smile on his face.

“Look for me in the crowd if you need an anchor!” Thomas shouted finally over the deafening chatter. “I love you!”

 

He trusted him; Newt always did. He wanted to shout the words back to the brunet, but his lips trembled and all he could muster up was a weak reply he was sure only he could hear. “I love you too.”

The crowd cheered then and Newt whipped his head around to the stage directly in front of him, as Headmaster Janson stepped out to the middle of the set up and tapped the microphone to encourage everyone to be quiet. Newt silently made his way up the steps, spotting Brenda taking a seat beside Teresa and the two other students asked to speak. He noticed from the order that he would be last if they were called up seat by seat. The thought only made him feel even worse for wear, and everything was strangely dizzy.

Luckily, he made it to the chair without collapsing, and he felt his sister place a comforting hand on his upper arm, her brunette hair falling over her shoulders in waves, under a graduation cap that was bejewelled with tiny gems that created half the American and half the flag of the United Kingdom for when she was flying there for Oxford University.

“Yes, yes, we’re all very excited.” Janson spoke into the microphone, for once sounding relatively chirpy. “I’m not even graduating and I’m all giddy, so I think we should get on with this thing, don’t you?”

A loud cheer rocked the field once more as a few more people took their seats in the centre or in the stalls surrounding.

“That was a good response. And therefore, I welcome you to the graduation ceremony, class of twenty-fifteen. This is a day of celebration, when we honour our students and for the first time, introduce them to the world. So, let’s get to graduating, huh? Let’s go graduate, what do we say?” Janson rallied the students, grinning out at them in a way that was meant to be affectionate and without malice, but just looked strange from a man who was always considered quite sinister and proper. But once again, the students applauded and stamped their feet, ready to be called up to receive their high school diploma. Really, Newt thought, a certificate that congratulates you for staying alive through the rough times high school.

“All right, all right! That’s great to hear! As we go about getting ready to receive twenty five students up on stage at a time through alphabetical order, we have five wonderful speakers from this class that have been selected to express their memories and thoughts of their time throughout high school.” Newt gulped. “If Mr. Newman would like to come up and speak first…”

Time passed by in a blink of an eye. Newt knew it was a clichéd expression, but as soon as he looked up at the crowd rather than at his hands in his lap, he realised that the second student was already almost done with his speech.

“—and remember your time at this school, as it will guide you in the toughest moment. We will be faced with challenges and moments when we feel like we have hit rock bottom, and in that moment I want you to remember that you’ve survived this far and you can strive to make it another day. Thank you, God bless you all.”

The boy bowed slightly, raising his cap off his head with his hand as the student body applauded what (Newt knew from the last few moments) had been an incredibly inspiring speech. It only put more doubts in his head: he wasn’t as eloquent as that boy, how was he supposed to follow any of these students?

“Teresa Agnes.” Janson introduced and Newt whipped his head around to face the black haired beauty, who cleared her throat and stared back at him. A devilish smile was on her face as she stood and slowly made her way towards the microphone, taking it in her perfectly manicured hand.

“Hello fellow graduates of the class of twenty-twelve. I just wanted to start this off by saying how honoured I was that Principal Janson selected me to come up here and speak to you all today. Now, whereas Edward and George orated beautiful pieces about hope and the future I want to hone in on the subject of truth… especially in this last year.” Teresa paused and Newt saw her slowly turn around to make eye contact with him, eyes glinting with mischief. He swallowed loudly, palms sweating as he anticipated what she was going to say… what she was going to expose.

“You may all remember that this year was a very special one for all those that support equal rights and also happen to enjoy the time old tradition of homecoming.” The girl laughed a little, sounding innocently sweet. “That’s right, I’m talking about how we all embraced two of our male students who announced they were in a relationship, and sent them straight to the top of the run for homecoming kings.”

Mutters of remembrance and approval radiated amongst the crowd, a few loud whoops and cheers among them, that sparked up more, but the enthusiasm for times long past just made Newt feel like throwing up.

“What is she doing?” Brenda muttered, fury present in her expression as the blond gazed at her, face now pale.

“Yes, yes, it was lovely to finally have that diversity walking our halls, not only as the first out gay couple in the school, but in the whole of Denver!” She smiled, but just as Newt’s heart dropped, so did her expression. “Only, boys and girls, ladies and gentlemen… it was all a lie. I am here to declare the truth and nothing but the truth and tell you that your homecoming kings, face of the LGBT community in our beloved city, Thomas Murphy and Newt Isaacs were lying!” He could picture the crowd without seeing it: eyes narrowing, brows furrowing, fists clenching, lips snarling. They were muttering in a frantic, confused manner but Newt kept his eyes glued shut. This wasn’t happening. “They were never a couple, just two shameful boys, best-friends that were sick and tired of being looked over, and wanted to climb the ladder to the top of the social hierarchy. They exploited this sexuality as if it were no big deal, using it to rise up and win our trust—our love! Only, they didn’t realise that by doing so they were lying and deceiving the many people out there that related to them and found hope in them, so that one day they would be able to come out of the closet and be themselves… just like Newt and Thomas had done.”

Newt’s breathing became shallow and fragmented, even with Brenda now squeezing his arm tightly to make sure he was okay. He was snapped out of his hellish mind-set when he heard his name mentioned once again by the devil in the blue gown.

“One of them has actually been brought up here today to speak, if you can believe it! So, Newt…” Teresa tilted her head, pure spite in her eyes, “what do have to say?” He remained silent, unable to move from where he was sat. “Nothing? I thought so…

“But thank you, class of twenty-twelve. I will end this by saying that throughout the rest of your life, whether it’s near or far from where we’re stood right now, trust your gut and stay true to yourself, because when you do, you’ll know what is right and what is wrong. Thank you.”

The loud hum of collected mutterings about the crowd made the noise sound like a far off swarm of bees. He knew that every single person out in the field was talking about him and Thomas, and Newt wanted to be swallowed up by a black hole, never to return. None of them understood and wouldn’t understand if he didn’t explain everything. The blond ran a shaky hand through his hair, hoping that wherever Thomas was in the crowd, that he was okay.

Brenda stood beside him before her name could even be called out. He was red with rage, and marched over to the microphone before Janson was able to comment on the last speech or introduce Brenda Despain to the stage. Newt was on the verge of tears, but tried to focus through glassy vision on his sister as she grabbed the microphone forcefully and stood her ground.

“In light of what has just come to light, I have decided to change my original speech to you all, which was based on following your dreams and being a good person, to just focusing on the latter with a few changes.” Brenda’s voice wasn’t shaky; she didn’t sound nervous, just passionate. He knew that the fury she harboured was all down to what Teresa had said, as the girl retook her seat a chair away from Newt, but he wanted to be as confident and self-assured as his sister seemed to be.

“To make it well in life, many believe you have to walk over everyone else to get what you want. You have to put down others to make yourself feel good. You need to demonise those around you that are happy, when you’re not. That is what my fellow student, Teresa Agnes believes and just did. But she’s wrong.

“Moving forward and striving for greatness doesn’t always mean you have to play dirty to get there. Look at all the most inspirational people in history that made their name heard, that spoke out peacefully and achieved something. None of them played dirty. It’s not always the option to take, and many don’t realise that by being good and honest and just, that you will make your way through life one step at a time. You’ll get there and you’ll be happy. You won’t have the guilt of walking all over somebody just to succeed and watch them fall out of your personal hatred. That’s what Teresa just did.

“High school is about learning who you truly are. It’s about making mistakes and setting them right, building the best you possible. I know it’s hard, I’ve been through it just the same as you all have, the same way Newt and Thomas have. They learned about themselves in this past year, and they never put anyone down to get where they are. What Teresa said was out of pure spite for them as people, and I want you all to see what she just did and learn from it. Grow to be a better person than that. Be kind, be generous, and be yourself; we will make it as the next generation. Love and be loved, because what else is there in this big wide world? Thank you for listening.”

Newt was utterly shocked by everything that left his sister’s mouth and the crowd clapped for her inspiring speech. Her mixture of defence for him and hope for what they could become. It struck the blond that she was also addressing her own change over the course of the year, and how the two of them had found support and a sibling affection for one another that helped guide each other through.

Brenda re-approached the line of chairs slowly, not glancing anywhere but Newt. Her eyes showed that she had tried her hardest, risking her own reputation, to try and fix whatever damage Teresa had done. Newt didn’t know the extent as he hadn’t seen the crowd since the black-haired girl had delivered her speech, but as Janson introduced him to the stage, he rose as steadily as he could, preparing himself to look out at the people he hoped he could still call his friends.

Newt didn’t look up from the ground until he felt Janson’s hand on his back momentarily, as if he were sorry for the happenings prior to this moment. He averted his gaze from the floor, and was suddenly confronted with hundreds upon hundreds of familiar faces, all staring up at him. He couldn’t read a single one, parting his lips to inhale as much breath as he could.

He was terrified.

“I’ve never, uh, been good with speeches…” Newt started, admitting his flaw before people told him something he already knew. “The last time I was in front of this kind of crowd was when I was nominated for homecoming king alongside Thomas…”

Silence followed as the blond racked his brain for what to say next, eyes trying to find the one person he needed to see and be his anchor at that moment. “Brenda said that high school is about finding yourself and learning who you truly are… At that start of this year, and throughout my time at high school, Thomas and I were nobodies. We were just two dorky guys sat in class, getting along, but not really standing out or being noticed. I never really cared. I was happy I was surviving high school – an experience that so many people have said have been the best and worst times of their life. I was fine, but for Thomas, he wanted more and therefore, I wanted more for him. So, when him and I were outed as a couple, we went along with it even though we… we weren’t actually dating.”

Newt still couldn’t find the brunet in the crowd, taking a breath to focus his point and continue. “We went along with it because we thought that we could fake it to win homecoming kings, and to be ‘popular’… to fit in and be noticed, for once. It’s all so petty, but we wanted it.”

That’s when Newt caught sight of him and his doe eyes, and he could tell that Thomas had been crying—from what, he didn’t know, but his heart thudded loudly in his chest. The blond zoned in on Tommy, his Tommy and spoke the next few words that seemed to come directly from his heart to his tongue. “I-I knew something was going wrong. I think I always knew it deep down, but we went along with it and we won, and as I said, deep down inside I knew something was there… And some of you may hate us, and the teachers may even revoke our titles, but I want you all to listen to me now, because the now is what matters, and I’m telling the truth. I’ve exposed what really happened and now… Thomas and I are together. As a couple.

“I love him, and some of you may roll your eyes and groan at this public display of affection, or you may think I’m still lying, still think this is all one big façade… but I wouldn’t lie to you now. I have no reason to lie to you. Let’s be real when I say that I’m not going to see the majority of you again until our high school reunion ten years down the line. I love Thomas.

“This whole thing may have been a big confusing mess, but we’re not faking it anymore. When Teresa found out, she said to me, how dare I pretend? I’m not. I never was. She even said the way I looked at Thomas was if I wasn’t putting on a show, as if I wasn’t acting. And I wasn’t.

“But I’m sorry, I couldn’t be more sorry… but this is who I am, who we are. We’re going to New York together, and I know that most of you couldn’t care less – that’s the way high school is. You don’t know me and as I said, most of us won’t see each other again or keep in contact, but I wanted to let you know. I wanted to finally say something that was the complete and utter truth…”

Time seemed to be frozen and the words stopped spilling from the blond’s lips. Thomas remained still in the crowd, eyes wide, tears still forming but for a different reason. It was only when he was engulfed in a shroud of magnificent cheers, applause and whistles that Newt blinked and saw the reality of the situation. There was no booing, no hatred, just understanding. He knew people would be mad, but the way he’d expressed himself in his proclamation spoke loud and clear to each and every student there today.

He stood there just staring out for a while at the students on their feet, clapping and giving him a near standing ovation, the fear he had felt beforehand now completely dissolving from every fibre of his being. He had done it and they had loved it. A gradual smile worked its way onto Newt’s face, before he was tugged away by Brenda to sit back down. Before he was completely out of the spotlight, he looked right back at Thomas and noticed the boy’s shaggy brown locks being ruffled by one guy, and others around him were nudging him and clapping. He was red faced, but the smile was evident in his features.

From the corner of his eye, he could see Teresa fuming, fists clenched, lips curled and she was breathing heavily in anger that her speech hadn’t ridiculed Newt and Thomas in the way that she had hoped it would.

“Now, now, calm down. Let us retake our seats.” Janson reappeared at the microphone, clasping his hands together behind his back. “I must say those were some of the most… _unusual_ speeches we have received from our chosen students and valedictorians over the years, but the reaction from you was outstanding, so I thank every single speaker up here tonight.” Another cheer played from what seemed to be a never-ending audio track of student applause.

“It’s the moment you’ve all been waiting for! We’re going to call up groups of twenty five at a time to receive their certificate and we’ll do one great big round of applause for them once they’re all up on stage, how about that?” The sound of the audience showed they approved and Janson flashed his smile again, pausing for dramatic effect. “Who’s ready to graduate?”

The band started up, live music blared loudly over the speakers surrounding them and the principal made his way to the pew to the left of the stage, unfolded a list o it and peered up and out at the students.

“When I call your name, please make your way calmly to the stage to receive your certificate and then wait in a line next to one another.” A few of the faculty were surrounding a table filled with diplomas all neatly tied up with a blue ribbon, the same colour as the graduates’ gowns. “Let’s get started… Mr Zart Abbott…” The clapping began as Zart made his way from the back of the crowd, right the way up onto the stage, followed by other’s if their names were called out.

“Miss Teresa Agnes…” He decided not to watch, focusing on his lap as he heard the girl’s chair make an unpleasant noise as she moved it back and stood, huffing as she went to receive her certificate.

Once she was gone, Newt’s eyes scanned the scene as the person would ascend the stairs, shake the hand of Principal Janson, then make their way over to receive their diploma from the staff, shake their hand and join the line forming in front of him. He recognised a lot of the people that were called upon, some from a variety of his classes, some just faces he knew because they were constantly awarded in assemblies.

“Miss Brenda Despain…” She was the twenty-forth name called from the first batch of students called up, and he quickly reached over to take her hand and give it a squeeze. The brunette returned the gesture, soft smile radiating warmth throughout him. Then she went up to do what all their other peers had done before her.

The final name was called and there was a set of twenty-five students on stage, staring out at a field erupting with cheers. The group bowed dramatically, laughing amongst themselves before they were urged to move back for the next lot of names.

The same procedure happened again, but this time Newt knew he’d be a part of the twenty-five. He heard Rachel being called up alongside Harriet, Ben (one of Minho’s friends on the running team), and a few other familiar peers. Then…

“Mr Newt Isaacs…”

Even though the crowd weren’t meant to cheer excessively for a singular person, they whooped for the blond as he rose and gradually made his way out to the front to shake Janson’s hand. He was sure he was sweating, and the firm shake of his palm didn’t do him any favours. Turning away from the hoard of people all grinning and staring at him, Newt shuffled towards where his English teacher waited, certificate in hand, ready to hand to him and send him on his way.

 _This was it_ , he thought, as he got nearer, hand now reaching for the roll of paper. _I’m done with high school. I did it. I_ survived.

“Well done, Newt.” His English teacher said, happiness present in the wrinkles at the corner of their eyes. Trying to formulate the words, Newt just nodded and looked down as he shook hands and was handed the certificate. It was so light in his hands, as if it represented leaving everything behind to start anew.

Joining the line of students, a few more stood beside him and the crowd were invited to clap once again before they shuffled back.

The two other speakers were part of the new group of twenty-five, and both them and the following clutter were sped through quickly as people seemed to get the gist of the entire ordeal.

“Now, our penultimate group. Mr Thomas Murphy…” Janson called out and the blond’s heart fluttered in his chest, standing on his tip toes to try and catch a glimpse of his boyfriend over the heads of the other students in front of him. Newt could just about see through the cracks, watching as the brunet jogged onto the stage to be greeted with the same applause Newt had received. He felt warm all over, pride coursing through his veins as Thomas was handed his certificate and turned to try and find him through the lines of people. He knew Thomas wouldn’t be able to see him, but he couldn’t wait until the end when he would rush into his arms and just hold him.

“Mr Minho Park…”

A few lower calls were heard then and Newt presumed it was a lot of the sports team cheering for their leader. He himself couldn’t help but clap, grin tugging at his cheeks as he watched one of his best friend’s make his way onto the stage, throw his hands up and then bow over-dramatically. A bubble of affectionate laughter rose up into his throat.

More names… Alby Stein, Sonya Turing, Clint Williams… Until finally every graduating pupil was positioned on the stage, a sea of blue in front of a field of green. Everyone was silent.

“Upon the recommendation of the faculty, and by the authority of the commonwealth of the State of Colorado, I hereby confer upon you the certificates that you have earned together with all the appropriate honours, privileges and responsibilities, in token of which you are granted high school diplomas. My congratulations to you all. You are the _graduated_ class of twenty-fifteen!”

Suddenly there were arms thrown up all around the blond and as he looked up he saw over a hundred of the graduation caps being thrown high into the air, raining down on them happily. Newt reached for his own and chucked it up to join the rest, before the crowd scattered and applauded and went to find their friends to congratulate one another on such a momentous occasion.

They were rallied off the stage to converge on the field with one another and the guests they’d invited, but al Newt could do was crane his neck to look around for Thomas, swiping up his cap. A few happy congratulations were sent his way, and some even said his speech made them cry in joy, which reminded Newt of the first time he’d been outed to the school and they’d reacted the same way. He’d gone in a full circle, but now he had grown so much more.

Spotting a familiar mess of brown hair a little while away, the blond excused himself through the group of people that were slowly splitting up to sections in which their friendship groups were situated.  They parted with ease, still engrossed in over-joyous conversations. Newt had his sight honed in and set on reaching Thomas, speeding up as much as he could.

Thomas was speaking to two boys he vaguely recognised as members of the track team, but as soon as the blond was in his peripheral vision, the brunet turned and beamed so brightly, he could’ve put the Sun to shame.

Running straight into his arms, Newt wrapped himself around the brunet, hugging him tightly as he nuzzled into the crook of his boyfriend’s neck. He had never felt more at ease than when he was held against Thomas, comforted in his embrace. Feeling the brunet squeeze back, Newt let out a deep sigh and couldn’t help but smile into the skin he was pressed against.

“I am so proud of you.” Thomas said and Newt could feel the vibrations of his voice box. “What Teresa did was… and you handled it so, so well. I knew you had it in you, even if I didn’t quite predict that was gonna happen. I just—I love you so much, Newt.”

Pulling away to stare into his eyes, Newt’s face flushed red and the brunet brought a hand up to run through the messy hair at the back of his own head.

“Can you believe that, even after all this, we made it to graduation?” Newt mumbled, trying not to stutter in his flustered state.

“We graduated!” Thomas stated in sudden realisation and Newt felt his heart swell.

“We graduated.” He leaned forward to press his lips to Thomas’, hands grasping at the sides of the boy’s face. His eyes fluttered shut, thumbs running subconsciously over the moles dotting the skin there. His stomach somersaulted, but not in the same way it had earlier: then it ha been fear, but now it was relief and adoration. Newt lost himself in Thomas, mouths working against one another slowly, not at all like some of their more heated kisses over the past few weeks.

“There you are! Oh, my boys!” The pair pulled apart, huffing slightly in irritation at the sudden choice of appearance and announcement from Newt’s mother, but once the blond reopened his eyes and saw the tear tracks down her face, his face softened.

Thomas cleared his throat, seeming weirdly embarrassed about them being caught kissing, but Newt knew it was only because it was his mother who had done so. They moved away from each other a little more, giving Newt the space to hug Anne, and behind her Steve appeared. Brenda accompanied her father, nestling into his side with his arm around her.

“I’m so proud of you, Newtie. So unbelievably proud.” Anne held him tight, hand on the back of his head and he could hear her trying her hardest not to cry. Wrapping his arms around her in return, Newt placed a kiss to the side of her head. “Your father, despite all his flaws… he would’ve been proud too.” Newt felt his lip tremble slightly at the mention of his father, but he pushed all of his ties with him aside. He had reached the point of his life where he no longer needed to imagine his father—this pretend, perfect embodiment of everything he wanted—when he had a great life ahead of him. And besides, Steve was a better dad to him that anyone else could ever have been, he decided.

A flash of white light caused Newt to squint and retract back. Blinking to rid himself of the glow behind his eyes, he saw that Steve had taken a photo of the scene on his camera, smiling widely behind it.

He let go of Anne and she beamed up at him, still teary-eyed. Newt knew she was proud, but hearing her say it once again made the whole thing real. He was proud of how far she had come too, how far they’d come as a unit. His heart swelled when his mother pulled Thomas into a hug, surprised look on his face until it turned happy and he chuckled, hugging back.

“Come on, let’s take a few snaps for the memory books.” Steve hurried them along, anxious to capture the moment forever.

“Okay.” Anne let go of Thomas and moved in closer to Newt. The blond glanced at her, then at Thomas whom he noticed was moving out of frame for this singular shot. “Say cheese, honey.”

“Cheese!” Newt laughed, putting his cap on for the shot and trying his hardest to keep his eyes open as the camera clicked and took the photo.

“Now let me take one of you!” Anne flapped her hands around, grabbing for the camera giddily before turning it on her husband and stepdaughter. They repeated the same action they had done seconds prior before the three graduates were gathered up and photos were taken of them.

“Now just Newt and Thomas,” Steve nodded at Anne, who agreed, moving her head up and down in some sort of graduation-craze. “Do whatever you like, boys. I’ll take a few shots.”

Feeling a hand take his, Newt allowed Thomas to pull him closer so they were stood beside one another, wrapping arms around waists. Newt grinned, and not just for the camera. Another few were taken (tongues sticking out, noses scrunched) before he felt Thomas’ breath on his skin and he turned to face him, only to have their lips meet in a gentle touch. Obviously, all previous embarrassment had vanished from the brunet, who smiled against his mouth. His hand flew up to hold onto his cap, eyes closing again as they kissed and he could hear the camera go off, capturing that one moment forever for them to look back on.

“Are your parents here?” Newt muttered, as they broke apart, gazing at each other from inches away. Thomas nodded, pulling his bottom lip into his mouth as he recalled where they were.

“They’re in the stands somewhere, probably getting food at Fry’s shack. I better go and find them.” Thomas nudged his nose against Newt’s in a way that made him swallow deeply. “I’ll be back as soon as possible.”

Then he was off, weaving through the crowd, and Newt was left with his parents and sister, still taking photos and discussing the happenings of what had just gone on. He knew that if he stepped away now they wouldn’t even notice, but he needed a breather to take everything in and spoke up in any case.

“I’m going to go say hi to a few of my friends.” With a nod of acknowledgment, he smiled and began his own submergence into the crowd of ecstatic students. He played with the sleeve of his gown and pulled at the silver tie he’d bought from Jorge’s shop, loosening it slightly.

“That looks like a pretty nervous gesture there, buddy.” Minho stopped him in his tracks and Newt turned to grin at him, expecting to see him alone. However, as Newt greeted him his eyes panned to his side, where Rachel stood in close proximity and whom he presumed were Minho’s regularly absent parents behind him, chatting to other parents.

Newt let out a chuckle and shook his head, looking from one of his friends to the other. “Not really, it’s just all kind of overwhelming.”

“Tell me about it.” Minho ran a hand through his hair, eyes sparkling. “Listen, what Teresa did up there was totally uncool, and the way you and Brenda handled it was shucking superb, man.”

“Thanks, Minho. I hope it made sense. Half of it I don’t remember; it was like I was on autopilot and giving free reign to my mouth to just speak.”

“You were amazing, Newt.” Rachel agreed, hair plaited into a braid that was resting over her shoulder. “We both thought so and what you said was so inspiring.”

With a small smile, Newt thanked Rachel as well before looking between the two of them more closely. “Congratulations to you two, by the way – on both graduation and…” He raised his eyebrows, only to see Minho’s face flush a colour he was certain he’d never seen on him before.

The jock cleared his throat and rubbed at the back of his neck, his signature smirk now bashful and shy. On the other hand, Rachel was beaming widely up at the boy, giggling a little to herself. Newt couldn’t help but love them—both as individuals and together.

“Thank you too, Newt.” Rachel spoke on both of their behalves, nudging Minho with her hip in an affectionate gesture. The boy had somehow helped her come out of her comfort zone a little more, and he admired how well suited they were for one another. “And congratulations to you too, for the same things but with Thomas.”

Newt embraced Rachel and received a kiss on the cheek from her before he stood back up and looked to Minho for a hug. The boy nodded and opened his muscular arms wide, pulling him into the embrace. Newt held him tight, face scrunched up in a blissful and toothy grin.

“Hey, Newt.” Minho spoke into his ear and they parted to speak face-to-face. “I’m having a graduation party at mine tonight if you’d like to come. My parents promised to leave so it won’t be lame, but I’d really like it if you would join us. And Thomas too, of course.”

The proposition of a party took Newt right back to where they had begun in the year. He and Thomas had tried and failed so many times to be invited to big events hosted by the ‘popular’ students, without much avail. So when Minho had invited them after getting to know the two during their science project, everything seemed to be looking up. A small laugh formed on his lips as he realised that the party had been the catalyst for everything that had happened over the year.

“Sure,” Newt agreed, earning a whoop of approval from the Asian and a clap of hands from Rachel. “But, on one condition: no outing people at this party, no matter what good it does them.”

Smirking, Newt watched and raised his eyebrows as Minho tilted his head to the side and shook his head with a laugh. “I promise no more outing. But I guess you could call me your fairy godmother.”

“In your dreams, Park.”

 

* * *

 

 

“I can’t even hear myself think!” Thomas yelled over the music blasting through every inch of the Park household. Newt laughed as both he and Thomas took a drink of their third almost-empty beverage. The alcohol was starting to make Newt sway a little now, making him feel as if he were floating and nothing could go wrong.

“Minho looks like he’s having fun!” Newt added, blinking a few times before pointing out their friend who was dancing wildly in the centre of the lounge, spinning Rachel around as if she were a spinning top. Nethertheless he looked as if he were having the time of his life. Almost everyone did, the more Newt thought about it and looked around from the edge of the room. No one was arguing or upset; there were only smiles present on the guests’ faces. Some were drunk and others, much like Newt and Thomas, were on their way there.

“Let’s dance.” Thomas stated, stepping in front of the blond before downing the rest of his drink. He grabbed at the blond’s hands and tilted his head, eyes wide and pleading. _Those stupid, god-damn puppy dog eyes_ , Newt thought, rolling his own before allowing his boyfriend to pull him into the crowd of people already dancing.

They threw their heads back and laughed as they bopped and swerved and span to the beat, occasionally close, other times allowing themselves space to move more freely. Newt didn’t recall anyone dancing at Minho’s first party, pleased how jubilant everyone was.

They danced for what felt like hours, stopping for the occasional drink now and then. Newt danced with Rachel and Minho at one point, he thought, but he wasn’t exactly sure as he laughed uncontrollably and downed his sixth—or was it his seventh?—alcoholic beverage of the evening. The dull floating feeling from earlier became a buzzing sensation within him and Newt felt on top of the world.

He didn’t want to leave that moment, wanted to stay in this tiny elated world forever, surrounded by friends and the love of his life, dancing and drinking and laughing until he couldn’t stand anymore. His mood and his entire life had flipped upside down and he couldn’t have been more grateful.

As Thomas’ hands reached for him to tell him that they should be going soon, the blond pulled him in close, staring deeply into his warm brown eyes before their lips met in an overpowering kiss. His insides hummed, filling him with warmth from head to toe, hands finding Thomas’ nape and lower back, where he curled his fingers into the hair and clothing there. Never had he been more thankful for the brunet wearing the loose black shirt he was sporting that evening.

The taxi ride home was excruciatingly painful, as if were torture to keep their hands off one another until they found themselves on Newt’s bed, pressing into each other forcefully. Their mouths tried to delve as deep as possible into the other as their tongues collided. The huffs of breath, guttural groans and wet smacking of lips on skin filled the room like that of a symphony only to be heard for the pair of them.

If he hadn’t felt euphoria earlier that day, Newt sure as hell felt it then as he and Thomas pulled off their clothes, running their hands all over their bare bodies, flush and heated from their elated state. Touches sent sparks through his veins, as if a fire were inside him.

If he hadn’t felt euphoria earlier that day, Newt was sure he was in heaven as Thomas moaned into his ear, asking Newt to fuck him until he was unable to think coherently. He was in heaven as he stretched the boy’s tight hole and slid in with a loud whimper, head thrown back, gasping.

If he hadn’t felt euphoria that day, Newt was sure that nothing could have matched the feeling of being inside Thomas, being the cause of all the sweet sounds that escaped the brunet’s mouth in mewls. Hair stuck to his sweaty forehead, Newt gazed upon the boy’s face as he reached his climax, head thrown back in complete bliss. Thrusting harder, he rode out his own orgasm, colours dancing behind his eyelids more vibrantly than previous times, the drunken state they were in making everything both brighter and hazier.

 

* * *

 

 

Thomas’ chest was broad and Newt enjoyed lying his head back against it. Although the tiles of his roof were hard as ever beneath them, the gentle touch of their hands together pushed that aside. They sat out in the chilling open air at two in the morning, wearing one another’s clothes for the fun of it, just looking at the way their hands entwined.

Thomas held his hand still; his head nestled into the crook of Newt’s neck from over his shoulder, allowing the blond to silently run his fingertips up the length of his digits, sending a tingling sensation down each one. They were still dazed from the alcohol, but they could see clearly how comfortably their fingers locked together, as if sculpted by an artist with one another’s hands in mind. Their fingers closed around each other and reopened. Newt couldn’t help but smile.

“Do you fancy a cigarette?” Newt asked quietly, voice slightly croaky from all the hoarse cries he had made when fucking into Thomas earlier that evening. He turned his head slightly so that his cheek was pressed against the tip of Thomas’ nose.

A light breath brushed over the skin there, but he received a reply rejecting his offer. “I don’t feel like smoking now. Haven’t for a while actually.”

“Me neither.”

“You’re my new daily fix of nicotine. And gosh, you make me feel a hell of a lot better than any stupid cigarette could.” Thomas’ words were sincere and the blond couldn’t help but smile and chuckle to himself. As the brunet nuzzled his face into his skin further, Newt closed his eyes and opened his mouth to suck in a breath. “You inside me was one of the most incredible things I have ever experienced.”

“Try to take it easy today.” He advised, trying not to think about the events from earlier as his face flushed, sending a heat downwards to his lower regions.

Another chuckle. “To think that we never knew any of this was coming when we were seven… time rushes by so fast. It scares the crap out of me, the future, and it you had told me back then that this—us—would have happened, I would’ve called you mad. But now, this is the most real, right thing in my life.”

Beaming out into the night, the corners of Newt’s eyes crinkled. “I would’ve said the same, but also with New York. I used to want to be a marine biologist like my dad, because I thought if I followed in his footsteps he would be proud of me and want me back. If you had told me aged ten that I would be going to study English and history at an Ivy League university, I would’ve run away in denial.” He began to play with Thomas’ fingers once again. “Now I can’t see myself being in any other situation – with education, family and you…”

Sitting up, Newt finally turned to Thomas and gazed in complete adoration at the boy’s face. Their hands never left one another, even as they shuffled around for them to be comfortable and visible to each other. They were still slightly out of it from the party and sex earlier, but it didn’t stop them from speaking the truth.

“You think we’ll survive out there?” Thomas raised his eyebrows, nudging his head a little to the side to signify the big wide world outside of their tiny home in Denver.

“It’s like our graduation caps said,” Newt started, licking his lips a little as he looked from Thomas’ eyes to his mouth and back again without realising it. “If you can make it here…”

“You can make it anywhere.” The two of them said together, smiles pulling at the corners of their lips as they leant in to press them together.

Thomas’ hand ran through the side of Newt’s hair, the other still entwined with the blond’s slender fingers. They held them tighter and tilted their heads to the side; now so familiar with the way their faces were shaped and how their lips fitted together that it was as if they ran on autopilot.

Newt moved so that as they let go of one another’s fingers, he crawled onto Thomas’ lap and straddled it innocently as they continued to kiss. Fingers pressed into the skin below his borrowed shirt on his waist, prompting Newt to wrap his arms around Thomas’ neck and kiss him until neither of them could breathe.

Thomas’ hands were now holding Newt tight around his lower back, and he said through kisses, “Who would have ever thought that our stupid little game would ever come to this?”

Foreheads pressed together, their eyes opened and they just looked at each other for what felt like an eternity. Newt’s heart was thudding out of his chest, as if a drummer were playing a fast beat on his instruments.

“We really gave them something to talk about this year, didn’t we?”

Newt couldn’t hold back his grin any longer as Thomas’ words filled his head. Laughter like music poured out of him and he threw his arms around the brunet in a tight hug, the pair falling back onto the tiling, so they lay there tangled in one another’s limbs, chuckling amongst them.

All of the heartbreak, pain, tears he had shed throughout the course of the year, Newt wouldn’t have changed a single thing if it meant not being exactly where they were right then. He’d suspected it before, but as Newt lay there, mind filled with nothing but ethereal happiness, he knew that as long as they were in love and together, everything in his life – no matter if he was in Denver or New York – was more perfect than he could have ever imagined it to be.

 

* * *

  

 

> **“Yet, as only New Yorkers know, if you can get through the twilight, you'll live through the night.”  
>  — Dorothy Parker**
> 
> **“Perhaps that is where our choice lies — in determining how we will meet the inevitable end of things, and how we will greet each new beginning.”  
>  ― Elana K. Arnold**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm actually at a loss for words. I keep telling myself to start jotting down ideas for the next chapter of this fic, but this is the end and it's so so surreal. I'm not okay but we did it. WE DID IT. (๑˃̵ᴗ˂̵)و  
> This took me two whole months to write because of a few reasons: the first being that I had huge writers block for a section of it, second was that my college work load was piling up and up, and finally, I just really didn't want to see it come to an end. Gah. Endings are the worst -- they're hard to write and once it's done I feel so empty inside. I don't know what to do with myself and I'm overly emotional because it's been almost a year since this story was first uploaded onto ao3 and now it's done, completed, finished, kaput.  
> I briefly said thank you in the beginning notes of the chapter, but I mean it from the deepest darkest corner of my heart and soul -- both me and ilsa would've given up a long time ago had it not been for your constant support and love for this fic and characters. Although Ilsa stopped writing due to schoolwork halfway through, we are both so so grateful for everything. The way you interacted with us and reacted so positively to the characterisation is the best. THE AMAZING FAN ART AND PLAYLISTS THAT CAME OUT OF IT I AM IN TEARS JUST THINKING ABOUT THEM and I just hope that we did it all justice for you guys. You duh best. (❁´◡`❁)*✲ﾟ*  
> This chapter, like all chapters, is unbeta'd and it's so long I am sure there will be a few mistakes in there. It's almost two-three chapters worth for you all.  
> Like I said, I really don't know how to express my feelings so I'm just babbling here, but thank you whether you've been reading for a long or short time, and know this is all for you. I hope we didn't let you down.  
> I guess this is the faking it au signing off for the last time. ( ᵒ̴̶̷̥́ _ᵒ̴̶̷̣̥̀ )  
> Thank you for the billionth time with love on top,  
> [Rosie](http://twitter.com/grantgustins) \+ Ilsa


End file.
